Eve From Ruff Ryders To Soft Life, How Love & Healing Changed Everything

Rapper and singer Eve joins the show, reflecting with Angie Martinez on her time with Ruff Ryders. Meanwhile, she is on the Where The Party At tour now traveling with her son. Eve discusses motherhood and her marriage to millionaire Maximillion Cooper. She discusses what it’s like being a female rapper and her time as a talk show host. Eve and Angie look back on some iconic Eve moments. Angie asks Eve some ‘In Real Life’ questions.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:05):
She came into the game with Paul Prince and platinum plaques.
The first Lady of Rough Riders. Eve's story doesn't end
at Bars and Bravado. It unfolds into a global reinvention,
international love, motherhood, healing legacy. Is she still even you, hi, baby?

(00:32):
If you still have the same It's funny because one
of the main things when I think about talking to
you today, I'm like, oh, Eva's had so many evolutions
of herself, so many seasons that we've witnessed, some expected,
some unexpected. But you're really but your essence and your
personality and your spirit has always been the same. I'm

(00:52):
just goofy, I'm just me.

Speaker 2 (00:55):
I'm thank you for saying that, because I do think.

Speaker 1 (00:58):
Yeah, I definitely I get bored.

Speaker 2 (01:00):
So I do a lot of stuff. I say yes
to a lot of stuff. I walk through a lot
of doors. But I am me honestly, I don't feel like,
like you said, I feel like that part of who
I am at the core has never changed at all. Yeah,
So people wouldn't expect that, because then because the packaging
that comes and has through all the different periods, it's
been so different.

Speaker 1 (01:19):
Yeah. Definitely, Yes, we're gonna go through a little tiny capsule, right,
is that what we're doing, Brittany. Okay, We're gonna go
through a little tiny capsule of some of those moments
and we'll see what that brings up for you. Okay,
all right, where are we starting? This is the first
time I met her. Yes, I don't know, this is
the first time I met you, but this is my
first memory of meeting you and being around you and

(01:41):
spending time with you. Okay, No, I love this.

Speaker 3 (01:46):
Okay, So this is the Sprite commercial that we shot
in ninety Yeah, yeah, I was like this is it
was a five deadly Vendom's Spide commercial.

Speaker 1 (01:56):
Yes, I was. I had maybe been on one thing
in my whole I think I had done Ladies Night
already made. Maybe yeah even maybe just I think you dish,
maybe just maybe just You're right, it was very fresh
for me to eat me around this whole environment. Yeah,
and you were fresh too. I was fresh. I was
baby what y'all want had just come out, and I

(02:20):
remember being on set with you and I'd be like
that song, she got it so fire like. I remember
thinking that like almost a slight envy.

Speaker 2 (02:29):
With almost slightly envious like it was so fire.

Speaker 1 (02:33):
Actually, you just felt that this is going to be
a hit record. This wasn't. It wasn't a hit yet.
It wasn't.

Speaker 2 (02:37):
Yeah, I think, you know what's funny, Like I don't
think I realized it, but Darren and Wade, Darren Dean, Wadeen,
Joaquin Dean, they realized they knew it.

Speaker 1 (02:48):
Like he was like, nah, this is out of here,
this is out of here. And I kind of was.

Speaker 2 (02:53):
Just like just happy to be there, like I got
a single out, like that's all I cared about. But
then being on that that commercial was it was so great, right,
that commercial was great. It went a lot of I
was about to say it was that was Hollywood. That
was like we had doubles, stunt doubles.

Speaker 1 (03:11):
Uh, we were jumping off a building. Yeah. It was crazy.

Speaker 2 (03:14):
Yeah, yeah for a commercial for a commercial, for a commercial.

Speaker 1 (03:18):
That was that was my first time too. We was
the same, like I've never been around nothing like that. Yeah,
but I felt that it was such a nice thing
to be able to share with. Yeah, we were really
in awe of the whole thing.

Speaker 2 (03:28):
I think in awe and actually genuinely happy to be there,
like genuinely like Oh, this is dope.

Speaker 1 (03:33):
This is so dope. It's dope. It's a lot lot.

Speaker 2 (03:37):
Yeah, it was on I think it was on Universal.
I think it was either Paramount or Universal.

Speaker 1 (03:41):
It was Universal. I think it was. Yeah, it's like
a big lot. It was a big deal. It's huge. Anyway.
I loved that we have that so long. Right, Okay,
let me run them through. Oh look at her, Look
at this girl baby me. Yes, yes, yes, yes, but

(04:01):
you're like a different girl here.

Speaker 2 (04:03):
Well visually, yeah, definitely, this was me, like this was
this was me before stylist, before anything. This because this
was my first that was my verse. My first verse
step was my introduction to right. It was a rough Riders,
the Rough Riders anthem and all the pumps as they
called us. I had to prove thisself and that was

(04:25):
my first. So I basically was showing up as me.

Speaker 1 (04:27):
I was artist.

Speaker 2 (04:29):
I wasn't artist Eve. I was just Eve the rapper.
I was like, you know, the new girl, fresh off.
So that's me dressing me literally how I would walk
through the street. I still wore my glasses because bitch
can't see me. Contacts and organized. That was pre contacts
and pre makeup, pre everything like pre industry. I know

(04:50):
we have a couple more, but take hold on for
a second because I want to take you back to
this time because when we talk about the evolution of
Eve and all the different.

Speaker 1 (04:57):
Sitcoms and shows and talk shows and but really the
kind it started with that Rough Riders, oh Man, right
for sure. And I would not I say that all
the time. I would not have the life I have.

Speaker 2 (05:12):
I wouldn't be here without coming through Rough Riders period,
without that verse on Rough Riders one hundred percent, and
without them, Like I always say thank you to Dean
and to Why, I mean to Darren and too Why,
because they were really my coaches.

Speaker 1 (05:27):
They really were my coaches, and it was hard coming
up through them. What do you mean, like just it
was boot camp? It was boot camp.

Speaker 2 (05:34):
Like it wasn't like, Oh, she's the girl, so we're
gonna treat her nice, We're gonna treat her like.

Speaker 1 (05:38):
Nah, I was.

Speaker 2 (05:39):
I was hustling with all of them, and I appreciate it.

Speaker 1 (05:42):
I appreciate it. Yeah, what do you mean, just like,
what does that mean?

Speaker 2 (05:47):
Hustling in the studio, Like if we were in the studio,
if nobody slept, I didn't sleep, and if I had
to carry back, nobody carried my bags.

Speaker 1 (05:53):
Like it wasn't like I like baby.

Speaker 2 (05:55):
I still was baby girl to a certain extent, but
I really wasn't baby girls.

Speaker 1 (05:59):
So I myself.

Speaker 2 (06:00):
So they saw that lyrically, I can like stand up
to all of them if I needed to. And I
wasn't scared to be thrown into situations because there was
lots of ciphers, lots of ciphers on the streets in Harlem,
you know. I wasn't scared to be thrown up against
any situation. And I think that's when it was like, Okay,
she can hang with us. She's the right girl for us.

(06:20):
And you seem to have been I know, maybe where
you come from, maybe just being from Philly. Oh yeah,
but it's like that's another thing I could relate to
you on is being young, being a young woman in
a space with mostly men and not just men, but
like super.

Speaker 1 (06:37):
Aggressive moment yeah yeah, yeah, you know manly men. Manly
is the men, and and navigating through that in a way,
what what.

Speaker 2 (06:44):
Was navigating and thriving both of us, like real and
thriving not just like like we're like we're here, Yeah,
but what do you attribute that to Like, I think
it as a Philly thing for sure.

Speaker 1 (06:54):
You just used to being with God Like I was
always a tomboy. I was.

Speaker 2 (06:58):
I honestly, I was a girly tomboy because I still
like my herd them, you know that kind of thing.
I wore tight stuff and whatever. But I was like
a dude, like I did operate line dude. Most of
my friends, my closest friends, would always do so. And
that was when I was growing up in Philly too.
I had girlfriends, but I hung out with boys like yeah.
But I think also Philly just gave me my feisty attitude.

(07:22):
Philly girls are known for being feisty and also being
the underdog, like I all I was. I kind of
thrived off of being like I'm gonna show you it's okay,
Like you know, I kind of liked it, like like, oh,
let me see what you could do.

Speaker 1 (07:36):
Okay, I'm gonna show you. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (07:38):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (07:38):
It's funny because when like later on years after my career,
people would ask me, well, you know, as a woman,
it's such a male dominated and I just never know
how to answer that question because it always just seemed
normal to me, like I would like you grew up
on the blood. You know, I was playing handball outside
with the boys. I was you know, I was the
tomboy like that. So to me it never was. But
then as an adult woman now sometimes I do think

(08:01):
back and I was like, oh, I was behaving that
way because I was protecting my hundred percent or I was.
You know, there's certain ways you learned how to maneuver.

Speaker 2 (08:11):
You definitely have to be you have to have on
armor when you're in those rooms and you're in those
spaces that can't be sensitive. You cannot be sensitive. You know,
I think a lot. It took me a while to
to unpack that part of myself. It took me a
while to be like, oh, you don't need that anymore.
You don't want to need the armor, the armor.

Speaker 1 (08:33):
You know.

Speaker 2 (08:34):
I spent a lot of time, so many years in
it that I think, you know I talk about And
I didn't realize this until I start when I wrote
my book and looking back on like why I was
drinking so much, Like why I was like numbing my
emotions on my feelings is because I was like what

(08:56):
am I doing? Like I spent so much time in
this hard place and when I didn't need it anymore,
I didn't really know how to get out of it.
So I think I was like using drinking to kind
of like counteract it. I don't know, it was weird
to like relax, like calm yourself. Yeah, calm relax, definitely,
and to stop like like which I also, you know,

(09:17):
stuff that we didn't talk about back in the day
of like having anxiety and no.

Speaker 1 (09:20):
No, no, no, that never came. We've never discussed anxiety, never.

Speaker 2 (09:24):
Discussed, right, And but I you know, now I look
back on stuff and I'm like, damn, wow.

Speaker 1 (09:30):
That anxiety. Yeah, yeah, it that's interesting. I never thought
about that that you would need to like if you
have all that armor on. I don't know from when
I'm trying to think about how I what my armor was.
I definitely used to wear bagging clothes. I also would
come over prepared, which probably used it as a rapper, right,
I would if I had, I would make sure that
I knew more than anybody in the room so that

(09:52):
nobody could up in front of me. Yeah, that's real.
And as a woman, you've like extra oh extra hard
on that. Well.

Speaker 2 (09:58):
Yeah, because I used to walk into rooms and like
I would go into sessions and people would be like, oh,
are we waiting for your writer? I mean, like I
am the right, she's here, she's here, you know what
I mean. But I got asked that so many times,
and it's like that's insane, Like I don't write these lyrics.
I write these lyrics like yeah so.

Speaker 1 (10:18):
But there's also like a toughness, like you said, right,
that we probably can't even all the way subs describe.
I think it's a presence, like carrying yourself with a
certain hardness that it's understood when you're in a room
full of guys that you are you're not for the shit, right,
so when you have to let that go. I never

(10:39):
really thought about that. No, it's hard.

Speaker 2 (10:41):
I think it took even with like I still had
it even when I met my husband, which you know,
our first we've been together fifteen years now, which just
crazy wow. But when we first got together, the first
few years we were together, I shit would play out
because I was and this is not this is not

(11:02):
just being hard in the industry, but hard in relationships.
You know, it would play out in a way that
he'd be like what I don't understand, Like why are
you cursing me out or.

Speaker 1 (11:11):
What did I do? I let me just talk.

Speaker 2 (11:13):
Yeah, like I missed. I was you know, I was
in the bathroom, mister, call like you know, and I'd.

Speaker 1 (11:18):
Be like, yeah, I know, you would. I know that.
He's like I was taking a ship, like I don't
give me a second like and I.

Speaker 2 (11:24):
And it took me years and even to also understand like,
oh shit, I can lean on somebody. I don't have
to do everything by myself because I'm used to just
doing it. But like, I got it, I got it,
I got it, I got it. It's like I'm fucking
tired of getting it all the time. And it took
me a few years to really be like, wow, it's
I got I got a partner.

Speaker 1 (11:43):
I can wow or I could be soft.

Speaker 2 (11:44):
I still I still sometimes still there are times where
I'm I definitely will be like in my head about
something and he's like what's up, and I'm like, no, no,
I'm good.

Speaker 1 (11:55):
I'm good. I'm good. I'm good.

Speaker 2 (11:56):
It's like you don't have to do that. It's still there,
there's still remnants of it. Wow, man, But what made
you what made you feel like you needed to shed that?

Speaker 1 (12:06):
Like was there a moment. Was there something that happened
or now I think it was just like it kind
of became this thing that was like what am I whole?
What is this for? What is it for?

Speaker 2 (12:17):
Like I'm safe? It was another it was I think
that's the holding onto the heart being like having that
wall or having that arm.

Speaker 1 (12:24):
Or two is making yourself safe.

Speaker 2 (12:27):
Because you are in these rooms, because you are around
these dudes.

Speaker 1 (12:30):
Because I think it's not just about for me.

Speaker 2 (12:33):
The armor is not just about looking at me and
being like, yo, okay, you can't try it with her.
It's also about like making sure I'm in a sa
I'm in a safe space like this, am I good? Like?
And I think I guess I didn't feel safe. I
don't know, it's weird.

Speaker 1 (12:53):
It's weird. I don't know. Well, you know you're probably
growing into it too, like making mistakes which I'll definitely
reinforced that you're not safe sometimes, especially relationships.

Speaker 2 (13:02):
Definitely, definitely relationships. Yeah, definitely relationships. I always was good
in my professional life. I was great relationships with the worst.

Speaker 1 (13:14):
I mean, you made a couple of questions.

Speaker 2 (13:15):
I mean, let's come on, you know my history. So yeah, man,
when you think.

Speaker 1 (13:23):
Back on that girl though, what would you tell her
or what do you think? What do you think you
were run for your life? No, no, what do you
think you were chasing? What do you think you some
of your mistakes were based on?

Speaker 2 (13:34):
I think because you know, just like the common story
of a girl that grew up in the hood with
a single mom that was seventeen, who didn't have a dad,
like you know what I mean, like literally that literally
don't really haven't seen what love is between what healthy
love is, never heard it being talked about, so I
never had any examples or anything. So I think it

(13:56):
was literally that, you know, or tension, I think attention,
but I think also like being conned by bullshit, the
sweet talking ass you know that can see this little
vulnerability that could break through that chink of armor, you

(14:17):
know what I'm saying, Like.

Speaker 1 (14:18):
Because when you're holding onto that armor, I think a
lot of women. I don't know if everybody would admit this,
but I think you secretly don't want to be so hard.
So when somebody makes you feel like, oh, I'm I
could be safe.

Speaker 2 (14:30):
I can be safe here, but it's not necessarily yes,
not necessarily safe.

Speaker 1 (14:36):
It's not safe. You know.

Speaker 2 (14:37):
That's why I think right now, that's why the soft
life thing is such a big thing, because so many
women still feel like that, like I'm tired of being
the one to do. I'm tired of having to hold
up and do this and that I'm tired of being
like So I yeah, I think it from I think
mind stems, like many things.

Speaker 1 (14:55):
Through childhood. Yes, of course all of our things come
from child then, but so are you living the salt?
Are you like the poster girl for the soft life
right now? Because you give your skin is giving it,
your energy is giving it oil, little oil. You seem
like you're in a very happy place. Are you living

(15:16):
a soft life?

Speaker 2 (15:17):
I mean I I jokingly will say yes in a
way that because I hate all these titles, but I
understand what it is, So yes, in a way that
yes because I worked on myself. Yes because I want
to be an amazing mom and I don't want to
carry my childhood shit into how I've raised my kid. Yes,

(15:37):
because you know, I want to have a thriving relationship
and good friendships and love myself. And yeah, so I've
done the fucking work. So it's not just soft life
because of the man I'm with. Because some people have
this idea of what my life is because of this
man or whatever. It's because I fucking worked hard on
my own. Shit, Yeah, I love that. That is perception

(15:59):
by the way, he married the billionaire and you have
figured out a life and.

Speaker 1 (16:03):
You've chosen it for life down me on there but overseas.
But yeah, that's because everybody says that.

Speaker 2 (16:10):
And I'm like, first of all, before I met him,
and he's not a billionaire.

Speaker 1 (16:13):
I need to clear that up. He's not a billionaire.

Speaker 2 (16:15):
He ain't broke, but I ain't broke either, so I'm
not gonna be able to broken, you know what I mean.

Speaker 1 (16:20):
So, but he's you.

Speaker 2 (16:22):
Know, before I met him, I was doing work, but
because I have.

Speaker 1 (16:27):
Him, it helped me do better work. Because he's a
good dude. I'm like really lucky, like.

Speaker 2 (16:33):
But beyond that, people who know me, who know me intimately,
my friends, know that I don't stop working on myself.

Speaker 1 (16:40):
I don't.

Speaker 2 (16:41):
I'm not woo woo. I'm like one woo. So you
know what I mean, I'm like one wo So I
do all the like, I do all the scenings, I
do the healing, I do the acupuncture. I do the
spinal energetics, I do the reiki, I do the breath work.
I do like that's what I that's my life. That's
who I am for real.

Speaker 1 (16:57):
You've done the work. I do the work. Yeah, nobody
has come along and fixed your heeled.

Speaker 2 (17:02):
Nobody can't fix nobody period anyway, that's just her juices.

Speaker 1 (17:06):
Yeah, damn, somebody.

Speaker 2 (17:08):
I don't know who's watching this, right, but somebody needed
to hear that real bad peace.

Speaker 1 (17:14):
Nobody can know. Nobody's coming against you. You have to
do it.

Speaker 2 (17:18):
Yeah, what is the What was the biggest thing that
you had to do for yourself and when when was
the big shift for you? There were a few things
because I'm hard headed, you know, uh my d u,
I that was a big deal.

Speaker 1 (17:33):
That was a big deal.

Speaker 2 (17:34):
That was because I had to wear one of those
anklet things that came after tambourine, right named after tambourine.
Show them a tambourine to take them to the time.
And you and your you were so fly and fashion.

Speaker 1 (17:49):
That's one of my favorite videos. It's so good. And
the interesting thing is that you look so good. You
nailed the fashion. You just seemed I was in a
happy blaze you were, but then you said this thing happened.

Speaker 2 (18:01):
I was in a happy artist place, an artist place,
but the label was not with it at all. Like
I I was fighting with the label and they did
not want to support the record.

Speaker 1 (18:10):
They didn't give me want to give me.

Speaker 2 (18:11):
The money I wanted for the record. They didn't work
the record like it was. Really that was a hard time.
And that's when I started being like, Okay, like when
I made that record was great, Yeah, but trying to
work the record, like my next single that I wanted
to put out, they was not fucking with it. It
was supposed to be me and Sean Paul like it
was just it got bad from there. It started going
downhill from there, and I don't know why career. Yeah,

(18:33):
and I actually I still don't know why.

Speaker 1 (18:36):
I still have no idea. Wow. Yeah, well you you
got the d UI after that video, right, Yes, I was.

Speaker 2 (18:43):
What's funny is I wasn't as tipsy is like usually was.
But I was taking like diet hills and drinking because
I was like, I gotta be skiy because the next
thing is this project.

Speaker 1 (18:53):
I was just doing way too much. And then yeah, yeah,
but pivot because it go back to we were talking
about what the big pivot.

Speaker 2 (19:03):
Moment it was wearing the it was wearing the anklet
thing because I didn't realize until I started wearing that
thing that I hadn't had a day where I hadn't drank,
Like I literally have been drinking every single day for
probably a year, probably long. I don't even know if
it's longer than that. So that actually made me sit

(19:23):
with my emotions because I was like, what am I
running from? It made me start thinking about stuff, the questions.
It was like fifty six days. Fifty six days, I
was like, and I remember saying to like my lawyer,
like can I like, can I go go to a hospice?
And like volunteer? I'll do Like can I go and
volunteer on the street? I would clean up the street?

(19:43):
Like it was like that's how scared I was of
not having to drink, Like I would have done anything else.

Speaker 1 (19:48):
But just wanted to be busy.

Speaker 2 (19:49):
I just wanted to be busy. I just wanted to
be busy and out of my head. I just want
to be out of my brain, which I still suffer
with that now. I'm like, I just am a very
living my head.

Speaker 1 (20:00):
I live in my head. Oh so you were hiding
from that for so long? Oh yeah, drinking?

Speaker 2 (20:11):
Work workaholic? Probably work, yeah, workaholic. And when you and
I remember a few times. I won't say I reached
out for help, but I definitely had conversations where I
kind of was just like, yo, you know, I'm kind
of tired and I'm kind of this.

Speaker 1 (20:28):
And then I'm like, nah, you be right, who's that?
The guy friends now? And you be ey, that's what happened,
the girl and a bunch of guy friends.

Speaker 2 (20:38):
You be you want to drink, you want you want
to smoke, like like all these things.

Speaker 1 (20:42):
And she's like, yeah, I guess so okay, alright, that's
one that doesn't The show doesn't work. Yeah, coding doesn't work.
But isn't that crazy how you have to sit down
to another thing we have in common?

Speaker 2 (20:53):
Man.

Speaker 1 (20:53):
I always talk about this time in my life, especially
on the pod. I had this car accident. I had
to sit down for a couple of months, and all
of a sudden, when you got that quiet time.

Speaker 2 (21:02):
All things start seeping in because you ain't got a
way to go, see you're gonna go.

Speaker 1 (21:07):
That's a scary time.

Speaker 2 (21:08):
Though it's scary, Like it gives me butterflies thinking about
that now, because as much as I do want to
I do work and whatever me sitting still is still hard.
I still don't really know how to do that with
my own kind of like Okay, guys, I'm gonna take
this moment, like you know, I still.

Speaker 1 (21:26):
Don't know how to do that. It's interesting, But what
did you learn in that time about yourself? Oh? My god?
Change shifting a lot.

Speaker 2 (21:33):
It allowed me to be like, think about the things
I want to, think about the things I didn't want anymore,
think about the ways that I wanted.

Speaker 1 (21:43):
To move, what I really who I really.

Speaker 2 (21:46):
Wanted to be, and my showing up authentically like me
or am I showing up because this is what I'm
supposed to be doing because people told me I'm supposed
to do this, because you can't stop because if you stop,
like they don't forget.

Speaker 1 (21:59):
About you, if you know what I mean.

Speaker 2 (22:00):
I mean, Like, there was so much of that, especially
back in the day. It was so much of like, nah,
we gotta do this, would you crazy? We gotta do this,
like we gotta do Scared of saying no. I was
scared of the word no, like I cannot say no.

Speaker 1 (22:14):
So, yeah, that's crazy. Yeah, but I get that. But
you weren't such a you were in such a whirlwind
of like just success. It was nuts. Yeah, it's like
you're run was crazy. It was nuts. And when it happened,
it happened. No, it happened, and it happens. What do
you think that? Do you think of that?

Speaker 2 (22:32):
Like?

Speaker 1 (22:32):
What is the pinnacle of that? I don't even know.

Speaker 2 (22:35):
I mean, like, you know, the earlier a little while ago,
I was talking about some of the new the songs
and some of the moments, and I'm like, you don't
have time in that time to be like, oh the
song did this?

Speaker 1 (22:48):
Are we charting over here? Oh? That's it.

Speaker 2 (22:49):
It's because it's always like, congratulations what we're doing next,
Congratulations getting the studio, Congratulations we need this next record,
So you really have no time. When I think back
on it now, it is crazy.

Speaker 1 (23:04):
Like I'm I.

Speaker 2 (23:06):
Said this to my co writer after the book as well,
like when I did the audio book, call who's that girl?
If you haven't got it, you should go get it.

Speaker 1 (23:15):
It's really good.

Speaker 2 (23:18):
I called her after I did the audiobook and was like, yo,
I'm proud of myself. Never had a chance in my
life to sit and think about all the shit. One
that I've accomplished, but two that I went through, got
through and was like, oh, damn, I'm actually fucking stronger

(23:38):
than I thought, even though I knew I was because
I was going through it, you know, but you don't
get time to patch yourself on the back, you know.
So yeah, I really was like, damn, I'm really proud
of me.

Speaker 1 (23:50):
Yeah, I love that.

Speaker 2 (23:51):
I always said people everybody should write their own memoir yep,
because it gives you that whether you publish it or
put it out or not. It was like, it gives
you that moment to really look at your life from
up top yep, and it will show you like because
I think as humans, we just are designed and built
in a way that we who has time. Nobody has
time to sit and do that. But if you did
do that, it lets you know you're and you're in

(24:12):
a much better place than you thought you were.

Speaker 1 (24:16):
Hopefully. Yeah, for sure. Take you back to that time though,
when you were saying, like you learned how to like
even in your relationship, like you were shedding that hard
girl because listen, the hard Girl show. We know, too
many people know what we are talking about that we
don't even have to get specific about what it is.
They know what it is. So when you're taking that

(24:39):
shell off, I don't know what is the scariest part
of it? What what helps you land?

Speaker 2 (24:46):
Just honestly being I think we're all scared of really
being seen vulnerably. It's the vulnerability we say the word,
we say the word.

Speaker 1 (24:56):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (24:57):
I've never been really comfortable with her, you know, and
that is scary. That is so scary, and just like
you know, sometimes you want to be a mess, but
she just like, is it gonna land right? You know?

Speaker 1 (25:13):
And I do again. You know, I'm.

Speaker 2 (25:15):
Lucky because I mean, my husband is very British, so
he can definitely be dry.

Speaker 1 (25:20):
And cold child. There's times where I'm like, you are
so damn.

Speaker 2 (25:24):
But then there are times when I'm really he surprises
me and I feel like that helps. And then again,
the other thing that I discovered is really leaning back
into my friendships because I lost a lot of that
traveling and being on the road, Like you know, you
don't really have those connections my family, Like this time
on the road is you know, I'm on tour and

(25:44):
I'm like, hey, my baby, which is crazy but amazing.
My brother is on tour with me. My mother's coming
on tour with me.

Speaker 1 (25:52):
Like I would have never.

Speaker 2 (25:54):
I would have never back then I couldn't even think
of that. But now I'm like, I want them with me.
I kind of crave it, you know. So that helps
as well. I think you know, people who kind of
hold up this strong wall or this strong.

Speaker 1 (26:11):
Like sense of self, you forget that.

Speaker 2 (26:14):
You hopefully have people you can kind of be like, yo,
I kind of I just want to talk.

Speaker 1 (26:19):
I just want to giggle. I just want to hang out,
you know what I mean. What is the key to that?
To like long Do you have a lot of long
term friends like friends? Yeah, dude.

Speaker 2 (26:26):
I actually saw last night one of my friends who
I haven't seen in a long time, but I've known
her since we were like eleven, Like she came and
saw me last night. That was the best thing, Like
so nice the last few shows I've been seeing people.
I have some friends that now will just because you know,
we got we're older, now, we got babies.

Speaker 1 (26:43):
Some of us got babies.

Speaker 2 (26:45):
I have some new mom friends. That's a whole of
the yo. It's like a sitcom. It's like as they come.
And because I'm in London as well, so I'm the
only mom like me, it said nursery, there's not many
rappers get through the door. So yeah, that's a whole
other thing. But the way it's a listen, it's crazy.

(27:07):
But at the same time, it's almost like wow because
being a mom, I also I have discovered it's the
best thing. Especially in the early times. It's the it's
the loneliest, busiest time of your life. What because I
feel like you're so insulated with this little person and
you're doing this thing you've never done before, and you

(27:30):
the baby's NonStop.

Speaker 1 (27:32):
But really it's just you.

Speaker 2 (27:33):
And that baby in the house or walking around the street,
walking around the block, even if people coming in out.
I mean, if you're lucky enough to like have a
whole ton of family like me, I was obviously in London,
no family whatever. I just feel like it's a really Also,
you're vulnerable. You the most vulnerable, the most vulnerable. You
don't know what you're doing. They let you leave with

(27:54):
this human child at the three days.

Speaker 1 (27:57):
In the hospital and you're like, ain't nobody come in
with us? Like this is literally the day. Well, I said,
they're just gonna let us leave. My husband's like it's our.

Speaker 2 (28:07):
Child, like yes, like we have to take our child home.
And I was like, oh my god, like it's a
good crase. I'm gonna mess this up up.

Speaker 1 (28:17):
It's so funny. But he has had kids before, yes,
so it's different. It's a bit of no. But and ain't.
I was like, how did you have four kids? But
it's because his it's been years since he's.

Speaker 2 (28:27):
Done the infant thing, like all my bonus kids are
all down twenties, teenage and then then they would teenage
and whatever. So he was just like, wow, this is
a lot. I was like, don't you know how to
do this? I was counting on you, Like but yeah,
it's a crazy time.

Speaker 1 (28:46):
Yeah, but you're probably a great mom, and you you are.
I am a mother, nona, I am a helicopter mother.
I am one of them.

Speaker 2 (28:54):
This boy, I'm trying not to make him a spoil brat.

Speaker 1 (28:57):
But is it happening? How you doing with that? I'm
doing It's not good. I'm not succeeding. He is, but
he's the best.

Speaker 2 (29:09):
Thing, Like he truly truly is my homeboy, like my
best the bestie bestie, and he makes me laugh, like
that's great.

Speaker 1 (29:17):
What is what is motherhood taught? What was the biggest
best lesson you've learned so far about motherhood. Oh, that's
a good question.

Speaker 2 (29:23):
Best lesson I've learned so far about motherhood? No, you
know what, I think it's a it's it's a teacher.

Speaker 1 (29:33):
It teaches you.

Speaker 2 (29:35):
I think I feel like he's my little Tea's like
my teacher in a way, because again, like I don't
want to carry things into the way I raised him,
the way I was raised. But when certain things happen,
like if there's a tantrum or something, I find myself
going back to what I know. If i'm I grew
up in a screaming household like you know, and I

(29:55):
grew up in a adult because I said so kind
of thing, you know, which I feel like you do
need a little bit of that because they need to
respect you. But I also want you know, I'm never
gonna be a gentle parent. I don't think that's for
me and I don't think that's for him. But I
want to find a common ground because I want my
kids to be able to come to me with stuff.

Speaker 1 (30:14):
So I think he's just he's my little teacher. Oh yeah,
I love that man.

Speaker 2 (30:18):
What about marriage? What have you learned about that? You
said eleven eleven years? Right, you've been eleven years married. Yeah,
that is child. I'd be like, we stay together. No,
marriage is hard. Marriage is hard. Marriage say that, but
what does that mean.

Speaker 1 (30:36):
It's because you.

Speaker 2 (30:36):
Are living with another whole ass human that got their
own shit and that you sometimes are like, I don't
want to deal with your jit, but I choose.

Speaker 1 (30:46):
To every day. It's a choice.

Speaker 2 (30:48):
I feel like marriage is a choice if you're doing
it with the right person you made. You know, if
you guys can communicate when we're really good at that,
when we are not all the time, you know, and
when you're changing. I think motherhood changes you as a woman.
And men don't have to change that much. There's not

(31:08):
much that they have to do, I think, and that's
hard for them. And then that becomes a whole different
thing because now this person, as you're learning who you
are as a mom, they're learning who you There's a
whole nother woman that has emerged for them.

Speaker 1 (31:23):
It's it's hard, you know, you really have to.

Speaker 2 (31:27):
You really have to communicate. It sounds cliche, but it's true.

Speaker 1 (31:31):
That's interesting. So you had to like learn how to
be a wife, Yeah, but then you also had to
learn learn how to be a mother inside of your
marriage also, like a different version of yourself, even with
bonus kids like my step kids. That even was like,
that's a learning curve. So yeah, I think you know,
marriage is hard.

Speaker 2 (31:52):
It's great. It is great if you're doing it with
the right person. But well, yeah, he's a good man,
he really is.

Speaker 1 (32:01):
How did you know it was him?

Speaker 2 (32:03):
I don't know, he will say, like it's funny. No,
I'll say this because I'm not a romantic. He's a romantic,
But I will say the moment I met him, I
was like who is he? In a way that I
never felt before, Like in a way that I was
like what does he do.

Speaker 1 (32:19):
When he wakes up?

Speaker 2 (32:19):
And the like I wanted to just sew everything, And yeah,
I was fascinated, Like why, I don't know what. He's
a chill dude, Like he really is a chill, laid
back and I think maybe what it could be now
I'm really thinking about it, especially coming from hip hop.
Everything's on show, I'm gonna show you everything I'm gonna
tell you, everything I'm about to do for you, Like

(32:40):
there was a quiet confidence that I was like, you know
what I mean, Like I was like, mystery, what's going on?

Speaker 1 (32:50):
That works? That works? That works? And he wasn't flashy or.

Speaker 2 (32:53):
Anything like, Yeah, it's not him, it's not his thing,
it's not his thing.

Speaker 1 (32:57):
So that intrigued him. Yeah, definitely. There's a difference between
being interested in being intrigued by somebody and then making
a commitment live your life with them. We I mean
he I will say this too. He definitely pursued me.

Speaker 2 (33:09):
I think when I met him, I was in a
space I had stopped dating, and one of my homeboys
that came to my wedding told me, and I don't
remember I didn't remember this, but he hugged me at
my wedding and he said, yo. He was like, you
told me you were you were sick of dating, and
you said the next dude that you date is when
me your husband? Like, and I was like did I

(33:32):
And I was and my friend said to me, YEA,
like I guess I said this, but I wanted someone
to come get me like I was in I was
doing these situationships where it was like, let's just see
what happens, pecially because I was living in La, so
every dude.

Speaker 1 (33:44):
Was let's just see what happens. Yo, I like you,
you like me? Oh God, don't even give you. You
feel like you want to throw up right now, but.

Speaker 2 (33:53):
Let's just yo, it's good right now, like all that.
So I was dealing with all that, and finally I
was like, you know what, I'm so so over it.
I'm like, I'm sick of dating, Like I just want
to I want something serious and grown up.

Speaker 1 (34:04):
I just want something grown up. And I met him.

Speaker 2 (34:07):
We had we spent a week together on his this rally.
I was driving on this rally, this thing that he does,
and he called me after and was like, yo, I'm
flying to LA And I was like, oh why, Like
he was like to see you, and I was like,
oh okay. And from that time, you feel like we
I mean, we weren't apart over that, yeah, because he

(34:27):
was like I don't know what this is going to be.
And I actually tried to say to him like, well
I'm talking to a few people.

Speaker 1 (34:36):
We figure it out, and he.

Speaker 2 (34:36):
Was like, okay, well when you're done, you should call me,
and I was like, hello.

Speaker 1 (34:40):
Like I never had a man saying.

Speaker 2 (34:43):
Like he really was like a mature adult, and I
was like wow, okay, and that that again was intriguing.

Speaker 1 (34:50):
Yeah, you know, so good for you. Yeah, those games
there're so big in that cycle right now. Oh my god,
what do you say? What is your advice to that
version of you that still with the let's just see
how this goes guys.

Speaker 2 (35:06):
Well, that's you know what, that's a part of me
that was still I think trying to hold on to
the armor of being you know, ah.

Speaker 1 (35:12):
I can date like a dude. No you can't, No,
you can't. That really takes.

Speaker 2 (35:16):
A toll As a woman, it takes a toll on you.
So I think that I would say, you know, just
let go. It's okay, Like you deserve what you want.

Speaker 1 (35:29):
Let go. I love that. And you didn't resist. You
didn't resist the change, because sometimes we hold on. I
think I was ready though, Okay, I was ready. I
was ready.

Speaker 2 (35:38):
I was still like, I still was slightly, but I
knew when I stopped dating is when I was like
I'm ready you already. Yeah, I was ready. So he
came in the right time. He did the timing is good, yeah,
because sometimes we hold on to another old version of ourselves,
especially you who, like you had the success. People look
at you a certain way.

Speaker 1 (35:57):
They expect this from your career, they expect this from
the type of person maybe you would date. You don't
seem to like play along with any of those rules. Nah,
I try not to. I have internal battles.

Speaker 2 (36:08):
I'm like, yeah, I definitely have internal but it's like
even you know, when I first started dating, the first
year was kind of weird.

Speaker 1 (36:15):
Because I was like, you know, he's white. Yeah, I
come from hip hop, I gotta go to Did you
not notice that until you were married? Like this? This
is not what I mean.

Speaker 2 (36:25):
No, the first year it was like one of those
things where it was just like, oh do I because
people I have people say to me like when I
would bring in this, I don't marry him, Like I'm like,
but why not? Like but then I was like, oh,
maybe I don't know. So I had some internal stuff,
but the way that I felt, the happiness that I
felt it overrode all that shit, like you know, and

(36:48):
and then I start being like like, well this supposed
this dumb shit, this is like these are like these
aren't even your real things. These are this is outside stuff, yes,
and that that was That's what I was gonna ask you.
Is now in a world where there's so much outside stuff,
oh my god, more than ever outside stuff, especially when

(37:09):
when some things that people think warrant an opinion.

Speaker 1 (37:12):
Yeah yeah, but even into racial dating warrants so many
things and things, and that was probably didn't really kick
until after you were already in this relationship.

Speaker 2 (37:23):
Yeah, but once we started posting, like Instagram kind of
was just kind of we would get some crazy stuff,
like crazy and I'm like, I cannot believe people will
fix their little thumbs and.

Speaker 1 (37:36):
Be like crazy stuff. Wow.

Speaker 2 (37:38):
Thankfully, you know it's been it's been a while. There's
like one or two still it's got to get boring
for them.

Speaker 1 (37:43):
At some point. Yeah, yeah, but it's gotten better. Would
have much better, much better.

Speaker 2 (37:48):
Most, I mean most most people are celebratory of both
of us. Like his following, He was like, I never
thought I had so many black women follow me, like
on my socials, Like it's so funny, Like they'd be
like paybacks, like going out, Like it's so funny.

Speaker 1 (38:04):
But I love that. Yeah, that's cute. That's really cute.
How do you navigate that with your child now, because
he is going to be in a world where he's
living in both worlds.

Speaker 2 (38:14):
Yeah, we started talking about it because he started looking
at skin color. He started talking about skin color. I'm
looking at my skin like that daddy's skin. And the
other day he told my mom, like, we had just
come back from vacation and he has this little farmer tan,
so like in the middle.

Speaker 1 (38:27):
He's still a little creamy, but then he's like rotisserie
on that side. So he said to my mom, was like, oh,
you got a tan, and he's.

Speaker 2 (38:35):
Like, yes, I'm mixed up, Like I'm mixed up because
of Mama and Dada and meaning like because we've told
him like, you're the best parts of Mama.

Speaker 1 (38:43):
Your best parts of Dada.

Speaker 2 (38:44):
So he's we're starting to have those conversations.

Speaker 1 (38:48):
He's still so young.

Speaker 2 (38:50):
But you know, one big thing for me and me
and my husband talking about this is like, you know,
I don't ever want him to feel othered because his
siblings are very blonde, blue eye or brown one, you know,
but they look a different way than him. And not
that he feels that now in any way, but as
he gets older, and becomes a teenager. Well, those things
might come up and you know, at school, so we'll

(39:11):
just have to stay on it. You know, I don't
know right now. It's you know, he's he's happy, it's fine,
and he's so cute.

Speaker 1 (39:23):
How's he doing on tour?

Speaker 2 (39:24):
Because he's on tour with you, let me tell you
how I think he's going to come back? I said,
I was trying not to spoil him. But production is
given him all kinds of toys. He just got a
giant car yesterday, a giant Dinosa. He's not gonna want
to come home.

Speaker 1 (39:37):
So he's a tour based toy. Baby.

Speaker 2 (39:40):
I had so many questions I didn't even go through it.
Now I have to make sure I get to some
stuff because of our time, But I do want to
go back to like the.

Speaker 1 (39:49):
You not being afraid to evolve. Pivots, so many pivots
in your right. That's like one of my favorite words,
is it? Yeah, why are you?

Speaker 2 (39:59):
Because that's how I feel, That's what I feel. It's
a it's a pivot. It's a pivot, and I believe
in the pivot. Are you aware of them when they're
happening or yeah, just after it happens now. I'm aware,
I'm aware, but it's usually again it's a it's an
internal I have this thing of like this is the
right thing?

Speaker 1 (40:13):
Is this the right thing?

Speaker 2 (40:14):
But then I'm always like, lean into it because if
I'm feeling fearful in a way, if I'm feeling a
way that I'm like, hmm, if it's more excitement than fear,
lean into it. Yeah that's your rule. Yeah, has it
ever backfired or not gone? Well, no, thank god, I'm

(40:37):
gonna go hug a tree when I leave it.

Speaker 1 (40:39):
So it's worked for you, thank god, thank god.

Speaker 2 (40:41):
But then again, I also I also am a believer
that you know, if it doesn't.

Speaker 1 (40:47):
And and no, because I do yes and no.

Speaker 2 (40:52):
So like, for instance, if something flops or if it
doesn't do as good, I still learn something from it.
And I am and I sound so cliche and like
dulous reasons.

Speaker 1 (41:01):
Everything has reason.

Speaker 2 (41:02):
But I truly do believe that, like I really truly
truly do.

Speaker 1 (41:06):
It's because it's because it's really true.

Speaker 2 (41:08):
It's really true, it really But some people think it's
like you know, a little woo woo, but ain't.

Speaker 1 (41:12):
I think there's a moment too in all of our lives. Well,
we always have to pivot throughout our whole lives. But
there are times where you're the confusion comes as like
am I quitting or giving up on something too soon? Yes?
Or am I shifting into something new? Yeah? How do
you know? That's hard? That is that part is hard.
I think for me, when I'm in those moments, I

(41:34):
have to get quiet. Yeah. I sometimes I need a
loane time. Sometimes I'll do a day or trip by
myself if i feel something pulling on me, pulling on me,
but I'm not really ready to let go of whatever's
going on, and I'm confused about it. It's like, get quiet, yeah,
and just sit on it and meditate on it, pray
on it, because that's real. It'll show itself, that's real.
I do. I do a lot of prayer. I literally

(41:57):
it's so weird. I'm always in my head.

Speaker 2 (41:59):
But I literally the other day said, because I'm I'm
a I pray to my angel's ancestors universe.

Speaker 1 (42:04):
That's like my team, my tribe. You got a squad taught.

Speaker 2 (42:09):
But I literally apologized. I was like, I know I'm
getting on your nerves today. I've been talking to you
all lot recently. But I believe it makes me feel
like I'm not alone. It helps me just feel better.
So I lean in into that a lot.

Speaker 1 (42:22):
I lean into their prayer.

Speaker 2 (42:23):
Yeah, that helps when you're in those moments trying to
figure out what's next.

Speaker 1 (42:28):
But you've never been afraid to.

Speaker 2 (42:30):
Girl, I am, though it's it's a it's I think
by the time it happens, I have done so much
internal that it seems effortless. It seems effortless. Yeah, but
it's it's a lot.

Speaker 1 (42:44):
It can be a lot.

Speaker 2 (42:45):
Like I remember when you moved to loved it, but
what were you going to say?

Speaker 1 (42:50):
No?

Speaker 2 (42:50):
When I when I was on the talk and like
COVID happened and I was home for a long time
because of COVID, and I was like, I think it's
I think I need to leave the show. But I
was sad, like I was like, why am I leaving
something that I actually enjoyed?

Speaker 1 (43:06):
That was weird.

Speaker 2 (43:07):
But then I was like, I have to. I have
to if I want to have a kid, if I
want to like grow, mot ate like stuff like that.
I don't know, because you were in this relationship and
he's yeah, and we were trying to get pregnant and
like how we were doing every two we were doing two weeks,
every two weeks.

Speaker 1 (43:23):
Back and forth. Yeah, so you liked that era of
you talk to your host. It was fun. I learned
a lot. I learned a lot. It was definitely it was.

Speaker 2 (43:32):
It was different, but I did I honestly, I enjoyed it.
I honestly I enjoyed being around the women. You know.
I learned a lot about myself. I healed some stuff
which I never thought I would really. Yeah, because being
on that show, I had to open up and talk
about a lot of personal stuff that I didn't think when.

Speaker 1 (43:51):
I took the job. That was the job.

Speaker 2 (43:53):
I thought it was a lot of like today's topics,
say topics, but because they really those were women did
really get personal, and so I couldn't sit there at
the table not get personal. Talked a lot about my fertility,
which I never talked about before. I talked a lot
about my drinking, which I never talked about before, my
daddy issues, which I know, you know, So there were
things that I very like I started speaking about that

(44:16):
kind of was like, oh, Okay, this is something I
can dive into, this is something that I'm letting out.

Speaker 1 (44:21):
That's healing me. I guess, yeah, yeah, good for you.
But then you have to walk away.

Speaker 2 (44:26):
Yeah, it was time. I think it was time. It
was time because I was. I did love it, I
actually was. I cried about that one I did. I
cried about them because I was like, am I doing
the right thing? Am I quitting too soon?

Speaker 1 (44:38):
Like? Literally?

Speaker 2 (44:39):
But then I was like, I want to grow families.
Oh yes, that trumps everything.

Speaker 1 (44:42):
Yeah. Yeah, I was thinking. I was going through your
book and I saw the story about the paw prince right, yeah,
how your mom hated them at the beginning, and that
you were ready to get them taken off. Yep, and
your mother decided she actually liked, like, you can't do that.

Speaker 2 (45:00):
That's part of you is how would people know who you?
I'm like, Mom, you the same lady that was.

Speaker 1 (45:05):
Like that is tacky. That was tacky. I can't believe
you did those paw prints up there. Yeah. No, she
was like, you cannot do that. But you didn't get
rid of them, No, I didn't. They're like a I mean,
they're like a birthmark. At this point. That's how I
feel about it now. I wonder if that's one little
piece of something that like just holds you kind of
in all the phases of your life. They're there. Yeah,

(45:27):
maybe so I don't know, or you don't even notice
them anymore, you don't even know. I don't even think
about it. I don't.

Speaker 2 (45:32):
I only think about it if I'm going to certain things,
if I'm going to certain events. Because my husband does
a lot of things, and we've been to places I
never thought I would probably.

Speaker 1 (45:42):
Wind up at like bucking and Palace.

Speaker 2 (45:47):
So that crazy because I was like, they, like, what
are you doing there? I was representing my husband's charity
and I got to meet the king and I was like, whoa,
So couldn't have the Paul prints out there?

Speaker 1 (45:59):
No? I mean I could have. You know, you should have.
I should have. That's really funny. Okay, we got in
real life questions and a ball. You want to do
our ball questions for you?

Speaker 2 (46:10):
I'm here, I'm down on the bowl's all right, so
I just reaching.

Speaker 1 (46:14):
Oh it's so far from you. We both doing them.
She's just doing whatever. Whatever.

Speaker 2 (46:19):
Let's see what you get a good One's see what
have you always wanted to do? But haven't that's a
good question. What have I always wanted? To do, but
haven't so like your bucket list, Yeah, that's on your
bucket list. Still there's a lot though, Like I do
want to still learn the language fluently. Which one That's

(46:40):
the thing I need to choose, like a lot of them.
Portuguese I love, I love Portuguese, Brazilian Portuguese. All Portuguese
is beautifulough anybody who actch it's all great. But Brazilian
Portuguese just sounds like singing to me. Italian would be sexy,
that'd be great.

Speaker 1 (46:57):
What else?

Speaker 2 (46:58):
I want to learn an instrument. I want to learn
how to play an instrument. I want a ranch. I
was just talking about this. I want my friends who
know me know that I've always been obsessed with goats
and bees. So at some point, maybe a ranch with
some goats and some bees, and I'll be giving you
some honey the next time I thought, I'm excited about it.

(47:20):
On the scale of one to ten, even o happy
are you today today?

Speaker 1 (47:26):
Oh?

Speaker 2 (47:26):
I don't like a scale. I don't know because I
feel like it's boxing it up. I don't know, it's weird.
I don't have a thing about that. I feel like
that's my one move as well. That's part of my
one move. It's almost like a jinx. What do you mean,
because it's just living it. You don't you don't need
to name it or label it or put a put
a number on it, just be in it. It's my

(47:48):
one move because I feel like you put a number
on it, then tomorrow be goddamn.

Speaker 1 (47:50):
Two or one. I don't know. We're good, life's good.
You don't want to label that. I don't want to
label it.

Speaker 2 (47:58):
But you are happy, definitely happy, definitely like every day
or most days, most days, most days most days, I mean,
m I give myself one or two days of pity
party because I'm human, so yeah, but most days.

Speaker 1 (48:15):
Yeah. So if something's wrong or you're bothered by something,
you give yourself.

Speaker 2 (48:19):
Oh yeah, I think that's important. I think, what does
that look like? A pity party day?

Speaker 1 (48:26):
If I can?

Speaker 2 (48:26):
It depends like hopefully babies at nursery, and then I
get a date to myself and walk around quiet time.
That is probably my most my quiet time, I walk.

Speaker 1 (48:36):
A lot and just think and think and think. Yeah,
so that's like a self love day. That's not like
a pity yeah.

Speaker 2 (48:43):
Yeah, I guess that's a sself a pretty party day.

Speaker 1 (48:44):
It's poor me, the world's terrible. Oh yeah, that's no,
I'm not so No.

Speaker 2 (48:49):
Maybe it's more of a self love because I'm not
a very I don't do that a lot.

Speaker 1 (48:54):
I don't believe in.

Speaker 2 (48:55):
Leaning into the poor me, the world is tough, life
is terrible because I always believe that you're the person
that can change it. You're the person that you're the
person that can flip it when you need to. So, yeah,
I like self love. Maybe I'll start saying that.

Speaker 1 (49:08):
Self love thing. Yeah, what about your legacy? Eve? How
often do you think about that? I don't ever know.
Is it like a wu thing, like a scale thing?

Speaker 2 (49:17):
No, I just feel like I feel like I'm starting.
I have a whole new life with my son. It's different,
Like I know, there's a whole my music and things
that I've done, But I also feel like I'm not
done doing the things that I want to do, Like
I you know, I want to write another book. I also,
along with learning the language, I want to do some
more TV stuff. I want to produce. I want to create.

Speaker 1 (49:38):
So that's hard.

Speaker 2 (49:40):
I'm not there yet.

Speaker 1 (49:41):
Yeah, you don't even think about it? Nah? Not yet? Really? No,
what are you most proud of in your career? I'll
say that instead of just legacy.

Speaker 2 (49:50):
Yeah, what are some of the moments or the things
you big, big moments, accomplishments. Definitely a Grammy one hundred
perc for Blow your Mind, because that's the one song
that I wrote one hundred percent of everything. So that
feels good, you know, being able to kind of I

(50:12):
don't know, flip into TV.

Speaker 1 (50:13):
Kind of pivot, you know. And so you had a
whole sitcom. Yeah, yeah, it was so good, by the way,
thank you, thank you. This is so those are.

Speaker 2 (50:23):
Those are huge moments that I definitely look back on
and be like wow.

Speaker 1 (50:26):
And we were talking about this earlier. Is like one
of the things that I think being a woman in
hip hop, especially an artist, a rapper, it's like this,
this comparison thing. Yes, like this, It's just horrible what happens.
It's like a comparison curse. As soon as you become
this figure, they want to compare you to other people.
How did you never kind of fall victim to that

(50:49):
or did you? Yeah?

Speaker 2 (50:51):
I think because I was so insulated with rough riders. Honestly,
excuse me, I don't think I think they because They
also allowed me to be so much in myself.

Speaker 1 (51:03):
I was very lucky with that.

Speaker 2 (51:05):
Like they never said to me, like, you see what
Kim was doing, You see what Fox he was doing, you.

Speaker 1 (51:09):
See what this?

Speaker 2 (51:10):
I always was like, they kept me so me, They
allowed me to just be me. Whatever I wanted to wear, whatever,
however I wanted to show up, what I wanted to
write about. I think that probably helped me a lot.
I think it did because it did. You know, in
certain meetings, Yes, people.

Speaker 1 (51:26):
Would say things about singles things like that, but because
I was so insulated, I think I was fine, Yeah, yeah,
that's really good, and that's something people should know. It's like,
if you empower people and you support people about who
they are, it just takes them so far as most
as imagine you were in a group that was like yeah,
like you said, you know Kim's doing this, you gotta

(51:47):
be sexier or you gotta be If.

Speaker 2 (51:49):
Anything, they was trying to cover me up while I
was trying to get me rougher out of vests all
the time.

Speaker 1 (51:53):
This time he was like put this on, put this on.
So like yeah, no, I I and not that anything's wrong,
but that's him or whoever or Foxy Right, but it's
like the it's just then evil of the cruel, what
is the curse? The curse comparison, but it's also white.

Speaker 2 (52:09):
Yeah, but it's also why women back then, especially for me,
like in the beginning, they weren't that friendly to me,
like because in the the overall industry of it, like
the execs and things like that, I think they were
pitting us against each other, whereas I was just like
happy to see everybody, like I thought we was gonna
be the sisterhood.

Speaker 1 (52:29):
Like it was not like that really did that ever change?

Speaker 2 (52:33):
Yeah, because as you get older, you know what I'm saying,
You sit down and have a conversation and realize, oh,
you got a Yorkie. I got a Yorkie too, Like
you know, its just silly shit, silly girly shit like
and then you're like, oh, we're just the like like
or whatever. We got something in common.

Speaker 1 (52:46):
Yeah, so you had some sisterhood. So were you a
Missy book?

Speaker 2 (52:49):
Yes, we and Missy great, me and Trina great. Like
that was instant like yeah, always great Latifa, always big
sister like I was.

Speaker 1 (52:58):
I was very lucky, very very lucky. Like, yeah, you
had some ones. Yeah, what about Swiss? I love that
you guys we were talking about friendships before and how
important like long term. I've heard Swiss talk about you
in so many different periods of your life and you
could tell there's just so much love and Swiss is

(53:19):
the best. Swiss is really my brother. Like Swiss.

Speaker 2 (53:22):
It's so funny because we might not speak and something
ran dumb, but it will be like aosis do you
hear mother?

Speaker 1 (53:28):
Oosis? I need to kid or.

Speaker 2 (53:30):
Whatever like well, I'll hit Swiss like he's never not
there somewhere at some point. And I love seeing his evolution.
I love seeing his evolution. And it all makes sense
because talk about a pivot, like all the things that
he does and him and Alicia do, but he does
within between the art, jewelry, music, whatever, car cammels.

Speaker 1 (53:55):
Literally camels like come on.

Speaker 2 (53:58):
But I love that and I think that's something we
always had in common as well. That's something that we've
always been able to talk about. Is that kind of
like yo, I'm over here, I'm over here, like you know,
so yeah that in real life? What are some of
what is your biggest pet peeve or trigger? Pet peeve
or trigger or trigger Oh that's a good question. What's

(54:21):
the big trigger for me?

Speaker 1 (54:23):
There's something you do not enjoy. I'll tell you one
of my own. Yeah, I like when people are manipulative. Yes,
and that goes that doesn't mean flagrantly, no, it's the
subtle little manipulations of you said that because you want
me to do this. You said this because you want
that person. I don't like to watch people bully anybody. Yeah,
I don't like manipulative people. Yeah. No, like, just just
ask for what you want, just say it, like that's

(54:45):
the thing for me. Yeah, so I wonder if you have.

Speaker 2 (54:46):
Some that one for sure, But in this business because
you see it a lot. Oh my god, it's it's
so annoying people who can't admit when they're wrong, Like
I lock because I'm a person.

Speaker 1 (55:00):
Really, I'm my bad. Did I do that? My bad? Like,
oh you could say sorry, oh yeah, I think because
let's just get over it.

Speaker 2 (55:06):
I'd rather also because it's awkward when you don't and
like it's weird, like and I'm really awkward, like in
real life, I am an awkward nerd, like when it
comes to certain things. So yes, I can't stand like,
please just just own up. People make mistakes. Nobody's fucking perfect.

Speaker 1 (55:21):
Tell me something you have You have recently owned up
to ooh, something that you had to say sorry for. Yeah?

Speaker 2 (55:27):
Actually I had to say sorry yesterday because I was snippy, snappy,
like I was like.

Speaker 1 (55:32):
I was just like, yeah, I need I need to
like please just give me. Can you just get it?

Speaker 2 (55:36):
I was like, so I did say sorry about that
because I also like not bull. I don't believe anybody,
but I don't like treating people. It's like almost getting
like getting caught in a crossfire, like this is my
energy and my mood. My bad, that's not you, like
I'm I think that's important.

Speaker 1 (55:55):
Yes, yeah, So you apologize to somebody yesterday? Oh yeah yeah?

Speaker 2 (55:58):
Was it like my girl manager? You are, I'm my
room manager.

Speaker 1 (56:02):
I was like, my bad, I know I was snippy, snapping.

Speaker 2 (56:04):
He's like, nah, it's cool when we get the ship
done right, Like you didn't take it personally, and sometimes
most people don't if they know you, especially, but I
do think it's important.

Speaker 1 (56:11):
I do own your ship. Definitely. I love that. That's
a great lesson. Are you writing one more ball? Going
to do one more ball? Oh? Yeah? Okay, okay, I think.

Speaker 2 (56:21):
What's one item on your bucket list you want to
check off? Well, that's kind of like that one.

Speaker 1 (56:25):
Go to the next one, go to pick one. So
you like one, you could pick five and pick whatever
best one. Okay, perfect, Take whichever one you like. Oh
that's a good one. Actually look at you and then
pick your favorite one. Oh my god, he's good. Okay, okay,
let me two. Let me let me see one more.
That's it. That's let me see what I like for you.
Let me see what I like for you. Okay, yeah,

(56:46):
do that? Do I've rather that? Okay? All right?

Speaker 3 (56:48):
All right?

Speaker 1 (56:48):
Because also I'm indecisive in real life? Are you? Oh gosh, yeah,
are you indecisive? I can be with business stuff. I'm
good like business. No, but like life stuff, i'd be like,
am I indecisive? No? No, no, not your clothes. I'm

(57:14):
a heard decider. I don't know if that's true. I
always love this one. It's the one that everybody. I
always stop on this one. Okay, I like this one.
Try this one. Okay, Okay, you take that one. I'll
hand you that. I saw that. That's a good one.

Speaker 2 (57:27):
Right, yes, If God would to text you right now,
will say, oh, my God, that is so good.

Speaker 1 (57:33):
What would he say to you if God would have
texted me right now, he probably have a whole lot, but.

Speaker 2 (57:43):
It test well text it'll be mmm, I told you,
I had you, I told you, I got you. I
told you, I told you you're safe. I knew you
had it in you. I knew you was gonna be
all right. I think that would be some of it.

Speaker 1 (58:04):
Some of it. I wish you would have fucking listened before.

Speaker 2 (58:09):
Yes, my girl would be like, I wish you would
have listened before, we could have got over this sooner
if you would have listened, But also like good, like
I'm glad you're listening now, I'm glad you're listening.

Speaker 1 (58:23):
Though you think you'd be proud of you? I think so,
I think so, I hope so, I hope so.

Speaker 2 (58:28):
I think it's funny because now a lot of as
you get older, and I, like many people do, I'm
not religious as such, but I definitely believe in God
and again, like I call it the Gaau, God, angels, ancestors, universe.

Speaker 1 (58:44):
So that's what I call it.

Speaker 2 (58:47):
And when you get the older you get, I feel like,
you know, if especially if you kind of grew up
in faith in any way.

Speaker 1 (58:52):
You just go back to that and it's a good
place to be.

Speaker 2 (58:56):
Yeah, ancestors is good answer. People don't talk about that.
Connections your ancestors. Yeah, what are your beliefs or thoughts
about that?

Speaker 1 (59:04):
Because I do woo stuff.

Speaker 2 (59:06):
Sometimes those are things that a lot of times healers
will bring up that I.

Speaker 1 (59:12):
Never thought about for years before. What do you mean?

Speaker 2 (59:16):
Because you know you don't think you didn't you know,
unless you unless someone kind of brings it up and
makes it make sense for you. And now I do
think about like I say, thank you for being that.
I ask for help sometimes I ask for guidance from ancestors.

Speaker 1 (59:35):
Yeah, I think.

Speaker 2 (59:38):
I think it's real. I believe it, I feel it
all right. Last in real life question, what do you
hope people if people can learn anything from your life
and your journey and watching you all these years, what
do you hope people take away or learn from how
you've done it?

Speaker 1 (59:52):
That's a good question. That you're allowed.

Speaker 2 (59:57):
To do and be how you want, who you want
to be. You're allowed to be as happy as you
want to be. That it doesn't matter where you start,
you can go wherever you want. Yeah, yeah, this is

(01:00:17):
Eve in real life.

Speaker 1 (01:00:19):
For more episodes, you know to do, subscribe like comments
and we'll see you on the next I r L
podcast