May 30, 2024 • 18 mins
Angie Martinez IRL: Jerrod Carmichael Opens Up About His Journey
Angie Martinez is back with a powerful episode featuring comedian Jerrod Carmichael. Jerrod discusses his journey of coming out publicly, his struggles with his religious family, and how he has embraced his sexuality. This episode is the first of the new season and dives deep into Jerrod's life, his Emmy win, his reality show, and his views on friendship and interracial relationships. Angie reflects on the importance of non-judgmental spaces and the impact Jerrod's story may have on others. Don't miss this heartfelt conversation as they prepare for an exciting season ahead.
00:42 Breaking Boundaries
01:20 Jerrod's Journey: From Closet to Open Book
02:37 The Takeaway: Comfort in Conversation
04:48 Family Secrets and Public Confrontations
06:36 The Art of Comedy and Personal Truths
09:37 Love and Interracial Relationships
12:12 Friendship and Chosen Family
17:16 Looking Ahead: Upcoming Episodes
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Mike check one two one two. We are back.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
We are back, everybody, man, it feels like a long
time since we did an IRL takeaway.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
I'm so happy to be here.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
I am so happy to be back, and I apologize
for the little gap in the programming, but we are here,
and we are back, and we have launched our new
season with our first episode, which was with special guest
Gerrod Carmichael, who I enjoyed very much on the show.
And yeah, and so we're here, and this is the
takeaway of that episode, which hopefully you guys have watched already.
(00:29):
If you haven't, please go do that and then come
back here so we could discuss it, or you could
stay here rock with us for the takeaway and then
go watch the episode either way as you like. But
I've loved the response so far. And I loved our
conversation number one because it was different than any conversation
that we've had on IRL. Driver was our first comedian,
first comedian, first comedian who came out of the closet
(00:52):
on television, YEP, and has been really open. It's really
been our first episode about sexuality and have to kind
of confront it, you know, he talks about being in
the closet for all those years, and he was a
public figure in the closet, like he had a whole
TV show, YEP and girlfriends and yeah, he had the
(01:12):
Carmichael Show.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
He was hosting things, and he hosted the Emmys. He
won an Emmy.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Well, he hosted the Emmys. I think after he came
out of the closet, and he had a whole career
before that where he was way, way in the closet,
even with his family. He grew up in a very
religious home, so it was very challenging for him to
come out of the closet. So he talks about all
of that and then now this moment where he has
not only come out of the closet publicly, but let
(01:37):
everything out of the closet. Every piece of him is
out of the closet. Family issues, you know, challenges with
his dad and dating, so many dating problems. The closets
flew open for our episode for Gerard Carmichael, and so
we talked about a lot of that and what that meant.
And I learned a lot from him and I just
had a lot of I don't know, but we talked
(01:59):
about him being kid because you know, he used to
listen to my show as a kid, which is super sweet.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Used to tape it.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
I don't know always that's always fascinating to me how
people would tape from other cities because we were only on.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
In New York before the internet.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
But thinking about that kid he said he was like
twelve taping the show and being in the closet and
being a fan of hip hop, and what that meant
to be a kid that age in the closet and
it being not okay for him to be out of
the closet within hip hop culture, but also where he lived,
and also being part of a family that was so religious.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
You know.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
Just I just learned a lot from him. I thought
he was super honest and dope and fun. What are
are what?
Speaker 1 (02:34):
First of all, should we talk about his takeaway? Did
he have a takeaway? Did he leave us with one?
Speaker 3 (02:37):
He did right? I felt I could go anywhere, And
that's it's the fear for me in day to day
life is that I can't go anywhere in a conversation,
that they are boundaries that I can't cross, and I
didn't feel that. So I guess my takeaway is the
comfort that I felt that I felt like I could
(02:58):
go to any any space. I mean, like there's a
moment like reflecting on what I'm talking about, like jerking
off after school. This is insane, like insane things, and
I'm just like, yeah, i'll say this right now. Yeah.
I felt very, very comfortable. So the takeaway is that,
I mean, you're obviously, so you're good. So this is
(03:21):
like you're able to make someone feel heard and feel seen.
So I felt that, And so my takeaway is that
someone will open up and share more if they have
a non judgmental host.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
That sweet oh oh shush, sweet. I like that because
he did open up. I mean, you know me, I'm
always like if it's if somebody's talking about me, I'm like, eh, yeah,
you need to share that.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Humble queen, humble queen.
Speaker 2 (03:52):
But it's like I don't, like, you know, I'm not
here to like, oh, look she really likes me as well.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
It's not that, but it is.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
It is a thing because I do think we live
in a time where there are not a lot of
spaces to do that. It's like there isn't and even
for all of us just in general, like everybody, whatever
anybody's opinion or reality if you're sharing your story, you
serve it up to be, you know, butchered, especially the
way things are set up now. So I appreciated that
(04:18):
he felt comfortable like that and felt comfortable sharing, But
I got to be honest. After watching his show on HBO,
it was hard for me to believe he has any
discomfort sharing anything at all. But what I learned from
this conversation was like, he's more comfortable.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
It's like sharing with a reason. So it's like, it's
my reality show. Cameras are rolling, so I can ask
my dad all the things I've ever he he's motivated
by it.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
He's motivated by it. He's found the way in. It's like,
I want to talk to my dad about all these
real things and I haven't been able to my whole life.
I'm going to use this opportunity. I'm shooting a reality show,
so we get a chance. We got to talk about it.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
It was just his.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
Vehicle for finally tapping into all this stuff, not just
about him being gay, but the fact that his parents
are not okay with it and why let's talk about it,
And also his father had a whole other family nobody's ever.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
Talked about it.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
I want to talk about it now, And so it
was just interesting to me how he used that as
an excuse for him to finally tackle some things, because
everybody in every family can relate to the fact that
there are things that people in the family do not
want to talk about and it is hard to get
people to crack.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
I admired that that he found a way to do that,
that he found a way to confront his father now.
So I know people have mixed feelings about it, like
doing that on television to that man, and.
Speaker 4 (05:36):
Well, bringing in members of your family. They didn't he
signed up to be a public figure. They did not
sign up to you.
Speaker 1 (05:42):
Didn't they did it.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
No, And I understand why people would feel a way
about it, But I also understood his take is like
he's trying to free them. Yeah, his whole family has
lived in secrecy about so many things for so long,
and he sees how it has affected them, and he
sees the difference in himself as he's come out of
the closet. He's freer. He's like your freer. He wants
that for his family. So, yeah, it's like non traditional.
(06:05):
It may be a little kooky. The way he's done it.
But I do admire that he's found a way to
do that. You know, I'm like, I don't know that
I would do that, but I'm like.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Okay, you got in there. Yeah you got in that wound. Yeah, yeah,
you got into it publicly.
Speaker 4 (06:20):
It's also it's the basis of one of his reality
show but his comedy sets too.
Speaker 1 (06:25):
It's like all rooted in truth.
Speaker 4 (06:28):
Yes, deep uncomfortable truth, the most uncomfortable of truth.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
Truth.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
But when you think about the best comedians, that's all
it is. We talked about that a little bit too,
about like the job of a comedian. I saw somebody
say I didn't tell him to see him tell one joke.
First of all, comedians don't have to be joking every
twenty four hours a day. Comedians are full people, and
sometimes non comedic conversations can happen. And I wasn't looking
for him to be funny. I wasn't really setting him
(06:55):
up for the punchlines on this conversation. I was really
interested in getting to know him and his experience. But
comedians by nature analyze people the world, analyze things, and
try to find unique ways of framing them.
Speaker 4 (07:08):
And as many as people were criticizing him or ridiculing
his show and his comedy special. On the other side
of that, it's also people who felt who feel inspired
by his story and could relate to growing up in
the religious household and all that stuff. I'm sure there's
other people who don't have his platform who are on
(07:28):
the Internet also telling their coming out stories or talking
about their toxic trauma and stuff.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
You made that comment about he helps everybody gets the
reality show. Yeah, yeah, no, yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
I don't know that I could go that route, but
it is true that everybody is living in their own
level of a reality show. In this world that we're
in now, where everybody has an opinion, everybody has a
reality show. I love that clip that he shared about
one of his favorite comments.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
I hope everybody gets their own reality show. People seem
to be aiming for again, if if you are posting,
like if you're One of my favorite responses is a
woman on TikTok. She's like recording on her phone. She's like,
what Jerrod Carmichael needs to understand is that everything don't
need to be on camera. Like, man, we're all on
(08:16):
the same Internet, but we're all just sharing the same Internet,
putting things out, wanting to be seen, want people to
say I see you, I hear you, I understand you,
I accept you. That's the hope, and that's what I'm
putting things out for.
Speaker 1 (08:29):
That is the hope. That is the hope. But yes,
everybody has a platform.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
He said something about that too when we're talking about Oprah,
because he was like, one of the reasons some people
don't like OPA's because people don't like rich people now,
so people will call people complaining because they don't like
Opra because she's rich, but they're complaining on Elon Musk's Twitter.
So everybody is involved in the same crazy universe that
we're in right now, and everybody has opinions and everybody
(08:55):
has thoughts.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
So he's just going in extra hard.
Speaker 2 (08:58):
I mean, it is kookie like there is wild stuff
and he knows that, and I think that's part of
his art.
Speaker 4 (09:05):
Somebody has to do it because I'm not participating in that.
I'm strictly a watcher, a strictly a viewer. I don't
want you're.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
Sitting on the Agie Martinez Iral Takeaway podcast saying not me,
I have no opinion.
Speaker 4 (09:17):
I'm when it comes to my personal life, like he's
put in his there's there's no.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
Secret, a strange man's foot in his mouth, literally.
Speaker 4 (09:25):
Which people also had an opinion about his selection in
partner You mean race wise, Yes, yeah, well you know,
race is always sensitive for sure.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
And it wasn't just that.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
I mean he had made some comments that made people
really uncomfortable. But yes, I love the way he breaks
down what his relationship means to him, and because I
think anybody in an interracial relationship feels the way he
speaks about his partner. It's like, it's so hard to
find a partner I have. I have friends who are
(09:58):
single who would love to to find somebody who work
day and night to trying to find some job, like
a full time job, and they're like, yo, there's nothing
out here.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
This doesn't work.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Like people struggling to find connection with another human being
that you could somebody you could live with, live your
life with, share experiences with equally, yoke, it is really
hard to find somebody that works with you.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
Let's play the clip. Race is always gonna be sensitive,
oh for sure, especially now.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
And I know I get it. I got it from
the trailer, like you know, you put it out I
got a white boyfriend. People get upset about that. People
have really, really strong feelings. It's funny because I am
in love for the first time in my life, and
here I am with someone who cares about me and
I care about him, And it's already it's hard enough
to find someone that you're compatible with just across all areas,
(10:47):
like like, just like I got to sleep with this person.
I'm not even talking about sex, like sleep, like compatible
in the bed, on vacation, food and interest and all
these things. You got to find somebody that you align with.
And I finally found that. And it's just like, who
cares what race that person is. I'm just so thankful
to have somebody. I'm so thankful.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
How can you find on that?
Speaker 2 (11:09):
Yeah, I get theories about like how people think, you know,
it's better to raise two children if you're you know,
legacy and things like that.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
I understand those conversations.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
About being like with another black person, yeah, or whatever
your religion.
Speaker 2 (11:24):
You know, there's reasons why people like to marry people
who are within their community and create children with people
within their community, whether it be race, religion, ethnicity, whatever.
I do understand that, But I also feel him like,
it's hard to find a partner, and if you find somebody,
then why should anybody outside of that relationship have any
(11:47):
input on how you live in your life. They're obviously
very happy too. He speaks so high his boyfriend.
Speaker 4 (11:56):
It's like he's like he's every even in the other
interviews that he has, he's like, my boyfriend's smarter than me.
He's so well read, he's with whatever. Like, no, he's
in love. Yeah, yeah, he's like in full love. It
was really sweet and cute.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
I really liked that part. I also liked what he
said about friendship, about.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
How you know, sometimes if you are gay, and especially
when you come from a family who does not accept
you as such, you have to kind of create your
own family when you don't feel supported and you don't
feel part of your natural born family kind of you know,
doesn't connect with you or tosses you away in some cases.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
How important it is to create your own family. Friendship
seems like it's important thing.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
Very important. Well, I mean that's kind of the gay thing,
like the chosen family, because you feel alienated from your family,
and so then you build, like you rebuild your family
with your friends and your life and that's a very
common thing amongst gay people who come out who have
(13:01):
a rough experience at home, and so my friends became
my family.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
I love that clip. Yeah, because I see that clip
in real life. My friends who are gay like different.
You know, the friends circle is very strong and it
is family. It feels like family.
Speaker 4 (13:20):
Yeah, what I mean historically, if you know anything about
like ballroom culture, there also used to be another show
on HBO called Legendary and it was about it was
basically like a dance competition show between these houses. And
houses were made up of people who are from the
LGBTQ community, and they have mothers and fathers who are
(13:40):
like ordained there and they form like a family of
not related by blood, but people who watch over each
other and sometimes they live in the same house and
they do things together.
Speaker 1 (13:50):
They offer resources to each other.
Speaker 4 (13:53):
So that's been like a longstanding historical practice that Yeah,
that community has upheld which has been important to them
even till this day.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Yeah, he broke it down. I just love the way
he's just said it so simply, and I don't know
I felt that, and you see it in the show too.
You see his commitment to his friendships.
Speaker 4 (14:11):
It's my favorite part of the show. Yeah, because yeah, no,
I'm gonna pass on that part. I mean, it's beautiful
that he supports that. But I love how he he
had two major friends on the show and he took
both of them in, let them sleep in his home,
doesn't have to pay, and like also nurtured their dreams.
Like one of his best friends was a comedian and
(14:32):
he put him on tour without ever having experienced. He
was like, yeah, have you opened for me? And some
nights it wasn't good all it was terrible. But he
loves his friends so much that he was willing to
open up his resources to do that. And I'm like,
if that's not a good friend, I don't know what is.
And even with his other friend, he has another friend
(14:52):
who she really wanted to be an actress, no experience.
He moves her into the house and she starts taking
classes and yeah, she's not that great either, but you
know he's maybe somebody watched the show was like, screw it,
let me give this girl a shot.
Speaker 1 (15:05):
I got I got a character three roll for her.
It was real love there. It was real love there
with his friendship. So I love to see that too.
Speaker 4 (15:12):
People can pick him apart all he wants, but like
his whole point I think with the reality show, with
doing this episode with you is like I'm showing you
the good, the bad, the ugly. Yes, take it how
you want to take and I'm gonna take the darts
as they come. But at the end of the day,
here's my truth.
Speaker 2 (15:30):
And a lot of that has to do with the
fact that when he was a young boy in the closet,
he didn't see himself anywhere. He didn't see anything that
helped him to cope, Yeah, to help him deal with
the guilt, because he had a lot of guilt. So
that is also one of the reasons for him being
so transparent is that is he wanted, he wants to
be what he needed as a kid. So I found
(15:51):
that interesting and I saw one of the comments in
the YouTube post was that they said it was about
him saying that jay Z was the art tect of
his personality, which some people might find strange.
Speaker 1 (16:03):
But he is a fan of hip hop, like he
is a hip hop for He's used to take my show.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
He was breaking down for me like verbatim some of
my jay Z interviews, And it's not that strange to me,
and I do like the fact when he talks about
Jay and Jay being supportive of his career and it
being about the art, because I think for Gerard it
really is an artistic expression. As maybe hard as it
is for some people to watch, I think it really.
Speaker 1 (16:29):
Truly to him is his art.
Speaker 2 (16:31):
If you watch his even the special before this reality show,
it is something very artistic about the way in which
he delivers his specials. So anyway, definitely worth checking out.
If you haven't watched the whole episode, you should. It's
on YouTube right now and given show a chance, and
maybe maybe if you tried before the interview, you may
feel differently about it after hearing his full story. So
(16:55):
I loved him, especially as we're giving up by the
way for Pride. Pride starts June, right, yep, Yeah. I
liked that this conversation was our first. I love that
that's how we launched it. It was different. We hadn't
talked about it, we hadn't really talked about sexuality munch
in any other episodes, and so I really enjoyed this conversation.
I felt like I really learned a lot from him,
And if you haven't checked it, out yet. You should
(17:15):
absolutely do that, and we're getting ready to drop. Next
week we'll do a new episode.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
We are back.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
Irl is back our next episode. Should I say it
now in advance?
Speaker 1 (17:23):
Do it? Oh my gosh. We're pivoting a little bit
for sure every episode. But by the way, this season
is a lot of pivots. You think we're going in
one direction and we're gonna go somewhere else. On you.
Speaker 2 (17:38):
Our next episode is somebody that I admire a lot
to Sarah Jakes Roberts du Da DA d d DA.
Speaker 1 (17:46):
This is Tdjakes's daughter.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
Yep, very successful pastor, pregnant at the age of thirteen.
Could you be imagined being pregnant at the age of
thirteen and being the daughter of TD Jake's and he's
already TD Jakes, I'm a cover magazines. She is thirteen,
at home, pregnant and somehow winds up becoming a pastor.
(18:08):
So definitely check it out.
Speaker 1 (18:09):
We are back. Thank you to Gerard Carmichael for an
amazing conversation.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
If you haven't checked it out yet, please do and
stay tuned for our next episode and we will be
back right here. Thanks guys. Go to YouTube, subscribe, Edge
Martinez IRL
Mike check one two one two. We are back.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
We are back, everybody, man, it feels like a long
time since we did an IRL takeaway.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
I'm so happy to be here.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
I am so happy to be back, and I apologize
for the little gap in the programming, but we are here,
and we are back, and we have launched our new
season with our first episode, which was with special guest
Gerrod Carmichael, who I enjoyed very much on the show.
And yeah, and so we're here, and this is the
takeaway of that episode, which hopefully you guys have watched already.
(00:29):
If you haven't, please go do that and then come
back here so we could discuss it, or you could
stay here rock with us for the takeaway and then
go watch the episode either way as you like. But
I've loved the response so far. And I loved our
conversation number one because it was different than any conversation
that we've had on IRL. Driver was our first comedian,
first comedian, first comedian who came out of the closet
(00:52):
on television, YEP, and has been really open. It's really
been our first episode about sexuality and have to kind
of confront it, you know, he talks about being in
the closet for all those years, and he was a
public figure in the closet, like he had a whole
TV show, YEP and girlfriends and yeah, he had the
(01:12):
Carmichael Show.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
He was hosting things, and he hosted the Emmys. He
won an Emmy.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Well, he hosted the Emmys. I think after he came
out of the closet, and he had a whole career
before that where he was way, way in the closet,
even with his family. He grew up in a very
religious home, so it was very challenging for him to
come out of the closet. So he talks about all
of that and then now this moment where he has
not only come out of the closet publicly, but let
(01:37):
everything out of the closet. Every piece of him is
out of the closet. Family issues, you know, challenges with
his dad and dating, so many dating problems. The closets
flew open for our episode for Gerard Carmichael, and so
we talked about a lot of that and what that meant.
And I learned a lot from him and I just
had a lot of I don't know, but we talked
(01:59):
about him being kid because you know, he used to
listen to my show as a kid, which is super sweet.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Used to tape it.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
I don't know always that's always fascinating to me how
people would tape from other cities because we were only on.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
In New York before the internet.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
But thinking about that kid he said he was like
twelve taping the show and being in the closet and
being a fan of hip hop, and what that meant
to be a kid that age in the closet and
it being not okay for him to be out of
the closet within hip hop culture, but also where he lived,
and also being part of a family that was so religious.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
You know.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
Just I just learned a lot from him. I thought
he was super honest and dope and fun. What are
are what?
Speaker 1 (02:34):
First of all, should we talk about his takeaway? Did
he have a takeaway? Did he leave us with one?
Speaker 3 (02:37):
He did right? I felt I could go anywhere, And
that's it's the fear for me in day to day
life is that I can't go anywhere in a conversation,
that they are boundaries that I can't cross, and I
didn't feel that. So I guess my takeaway is the
comfort that I felt that I felt like I could
(02:58):
go to any any space. I mean, like there's a
moment like reflecting on what I'm talking about, like jerking
off after school. This is insane, like insane things, and
I'm just like, yeah, i'll say this right now. Yeah.
I felt very, very comfortable. So the takeaway is that,
I mean, you're obviously, so you're good. So this is
(03:21):
like you're able to make someone feel heard and feel seen.
So I felt that, And so my takeaway is that
someone will open up and share more if they have
a non judgmental host.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
That sweet oh oh shush, sweet. I like that because
he did open up. I mean, you know me, I'm
always like if it's if somebody's talking about me, I'm like, eh, yeah,
you need to share that.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Humble queen, humble queen.
Speaker 2 (03:52):
But it's like I don't, like, you know, I'm not
here to like, oh, look she really likes me as well.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
It's not that, but it is.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
It is a thing because I do think we live
in a time where there are not a lot of
spaces to do that. It's like there isn't and even
for all of us just in general, like everybody, whatever
anybody's opinion or reality if you're sharing your story, you
serve it up to be, you know, butchered, especially the
way things are set up now. So I appreciated that
(04:18):
he felt comfortable like that and felt comfortable sharing, But
I got to be honest. After watching his show on HBO,
it was hard for me to believe he has any
discomfort sharing anything at all. But what I learned from
this conversation was like, he's more comfortable.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
It's like sharing with a reason. So it's like, it's
my reality show. Cameras are rolling, so I can ask
my dad all the things I've ever he he's motivated
by it.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
He's motivated by it. He's found the way in. It's like,
I want to talk to my dad about all these
real things and I haven't been able to my whole life.
I'm going to use this opportunity. I'm shooting a reality show,
so we get a chance. We got to talk about it.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
It was just his.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
Vehicle for finally tapping into all this stuff, not just
about him being gay, but the fact that his parents
are not okay with it and why let's talk about it,
And also his father had a whole other family nobody's ever.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
Talked about it.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
I want to talk about it now, And so it
was just interesting to me how he used that as
an excuse for him to finally tackle some things, because
everybody in every family can relate to the fact that
there are things that people in the family do not
want to talk about and it is hard to get
people to crack.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
I admired that that he found a way to do that,
that he found a way to confront his father now.
So I know people have mixed feelings about it, like
doing that on television to that man, and.
Speaker 4 (05:36):
Well, bringing in members of your family. They didn't he
signed up to be a public figure. They did not
sign up to you.
Speaker 1 (05:42):
Didn't they did it.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
No, And I understand why people would feel a way
about it, But I also understood his take is like
he's trying to free them. Yeah, his whole family has
lived in secrecy about so many things for so long,
and he sees how it has affected them, and he
sees the difference in himself as he's come out of
the closet. He's freer. He's like your freer. He wants
that for his family. So, yeah, it's like non traditional.
(06:05):
It may be a little kooky. The way he's done it.
But I do admire that he's found a way to
do that. You know, I'm like, I don't know that
I would do that, but I'm like.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Okay, you got in there. Yeah you got in that wound. Yeah, yeah,
you got into it publicly.
Speaker 4 (06:20):
It's also it's the basis of one of his reality
show but his comedy sets too.
Speaker 1 (06:25):
It's like all rooted in truth.
Speaker 4 (06:28):
Yes, deep uncomfortable truth, the most uncomfortable of truth.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
Truth.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
But when you think about the best comedians, that's all
it is. We talked about that a little bit too,
about like the job of a comedian. I saw somebody
say I didn't tell him to see him tell one joke.
First of all, comedians don't have to be joking every
twenty four hours a day. Comedians are full people, and
sometimes non comedic conversations can happen. And I wasn't looking
for him to be funny. I wasn't really setting him
(06:55):
up for the punchlines on this conversation. I was really
interested in getting to know him and his experience. But
comedians by nature analyze people the world, analyze things, and
try to find unique ways of framing them.
Speaker 4 (07:08):
And as many as people were criticizing him or ridiculing
his show and his comedy special. On the other side
of that, it's also people who felt who feel inspired
by his story and could relate to growing up in
the religious household and all that stuff. I'm sure there's
other people who don't have his platform who are on
(07:28):
the Internet also telling their coming out stories or talking
about their toxic trauma and stuff.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
You made that comment about he helps everybody gets the
reality show. Yeah, yeah, no, yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
I don't know that I could go that route, but
it is true that everybody is living in their own
level of a reality show. In this world that we're
in now, where everybody has an opinion, everybody has a
reality show. I love that clip that he shared about
one of his favorite comments.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
I hope everybody gets their own reality show. People seem
to be aiming for again, if if you are posting,
like if you're One of my favorite responses is a
woman on TikTok. She's like recording on her phone. She's like,
what Jerrod Carmichael needs to understand is that everything don't
need to be on camera. Like, man, we're all on
(08:16):
the same Internet, but we're all just sharing the same Internet,
putting things out, wanting to be seen, want people to
say I see you, I hear you, I understand you,
I accept you. That's the hope, and that's what I'm
putting things out for.
Speaker 1 (08:29):
That is the hope. That is the hope. But yes,
everybody has a platform.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
He said something about that too when we're talking about Oprah,
because he was like, one of the reasons some people
don't like OPA's because people don't like rich people now,
so people will call people complaining because they don't like
Opra because she's rich, but they're complaining on Elon Musk's Twitter.
So everybody is involved in the same crazy universe that
we're in right now, and everybody has opinions and everybody
(08:55):
has thoughts.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
So he's just going in extra hard.
Speaker 2 (08:58):
I mean, it is kookie like there is wild stuff
and he knows that, and I think that's part of
his art.
Speaker 4 (09:05):
Somebody has to do it because I'm not participating in that.
I'm strictly a watcher, a strictly a viewer. I don't
want you're.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
Sitting on the Agie Martinez Iral Takeaway podcast saying not me,
I have no opinion.
Speaker 4 (09:17):
I'm when it comes to my personal life, like he's
put in his there's there's no.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
Secret, a strange man's foot in his mouth, literally.
Speaker 4 (09:25):
Which people also had an opinion about his selection in
partner You mean race wise, Yes, yeah, well you know,
race is always sensitive for sure.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
And it wasn't just that.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
I mean he had made some comments that made people
really uncomfortable. But yes, I love the way he breaks
down what his relationship means to him, and because I
think anybody in an interracial relationship feels the way he
speaks about his partner. It's like, it's so hard to
find a partner I have. I have friends who are
(09:58):
single who would love to to find somebody who work
day and night to trying to find some job, like
a full time job, and they're like, yo, there's nothing
out here.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
This doesn't work.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Like people struggling to find connection with another human being
that you could somebody you could live with, live your
life with, share experiences with equally, yoke, it is really
hard to find somebody that works with you.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
Let's play the clip. Race is always gonna be sensitive,
oh for sure, especially now.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
And I know I get it. I got it from
the trailer, like you know, you put it out I
got a white boyfriend. People get upset about that. People
have really, really strong feelings. It's funny because I am
in love for the first time in my life, and
here I am with someone who cares about me and
I care about him, And it's already it's hard enough
to find someone that you're compatible with just across all areas,
(10:47):
like like, just like I got to sleep with this person.
I'm not even talking about sex, like sleep, like compatible
in the bed, on vacation, food and interest and all
these things. You got to find somebody that you align with.
And I finally found that. And it's just like, who
cares what race that person is. I'm just so thankful
to have somebody. I'm so thankful.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
How can you find on that?
Speaker 2 (11:09):
Yeah, I get theories about like how people think, you know,
it's better to raise two children if you're you know,
legacy and things like that.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
I understand those conversations.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
About being like with another black person, yeah, or whatever
your religion.
Speaker 2 (11:24):
You know, there's reasons why people like to marry people
who are within their community and create children with people
within their community, whether it be race, religion, ethnicity, whatever.
I do understand that, But I also feel him like,
it's hard to find a partner, and if you find somebody,
then why should anybody outside of that relationship have any
(11:47):
input on how you live in your life. They're obviously
very happy too. He speaks so high his boyfriend.
Speaker 4 (11:56):
It's like he's like he's every even in the other
interviews that he has, he's like, my boyfriend's smarter than me.
He's so well read, he's with whatever. Like, no, he's
in love. Yeah, yeah, he's like in full love. It
was really sweet and cute.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
I really liked that part. I also liked what he
said about friendship, about.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
How you know, sometimes if you are gay, and especially
when you come from a family who does not accept
you as such, you have to kind of create your
own family when you don't feel supported and you don't
feel part of your natural born family kind of you know,
doesn't connect with you or tosses you away in some cases.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
How important it is to create your own family. Friendship
seems like it's important thing.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
Very important. Well, I mean that's kind of the gay thing,
like the chosen family, because you feel alienated from your family,
and so then you build, like you rebuild your family
with your friends and your life and that's a very
common thing amongst gay people who come out who have
(13:01):
a rough experience at home, and so my friends became
my family.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
I love that clip. Yeah, because I see that clip
in real life. My friends who are gay like different.
You know, the friends circle is very strong and it
is family. It feels like family.
Speaker 4 (13:20):
Yeah, what I mean historically, if you know anything about
like ballroom culture, there also used to be another show
on HBO called Legendary and it was about it was
basically like a dance competition show between these houses. And
houses were made up of people who are from the
LGBTQ community, and they have mothers and fathers who are
(13:40):
like ordained there and they form like a family of
not related by blood, but people who watch over each
other and sometimes they live in the same house and
they do things together.
Speaker 1 (13:50):
They offer resources to each other.
Speaker 4 (13:53):
So that's been like a longstanding historical practice that Yeah,
that community has upheld which has been important to them
even till this day.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Yeah, he broke it down. I just love the way
he's just said it so simply, and I don't know
I felt that, and you see it in the show too.
You see his commitment to his friendships.
Speaker 4 (14:11):
It's my favorite part of the show. Yeah, because yeah, no,
I'm gonna pass on that part. I mean, it's beautiful
that he supports that. But I love how he he
had two major friends on the show and he took
both of them in, let them sleep in his home,
doesn't have to pay, and like also nurtured their dreams.
Like one of his best friends was a comedian and
(14:32):
he put him on tour without ever having experienced. He
was like, yeah, have you opened for me? And some
nights it wasn't good all it was terrible. But he
loves his friends so much that he was willing to
open up his resources to do that. And I'm like,
if that's not a good friend, I don't know what is.
And even with his other friend, he has another friend
(14:52):
who she really wanted to be an actress, no experience.
He moves her into the house and she starts taking
classes and yeah, she's not that great either, but you
know he's maybe somebody watched the show was like, screw it,
let me give this girl a shot.
Speaker 1 (15:05):
I got I got a character three roll for her.
It was real love there. It was real love there
with his friendship. So I love to see that too.
Speaker 4 (15:12):
People can pick him apart all he wants, but like
his whole point I think with the reality show, with
doing this episode with you is like I'm showing you
the good, the bad, the ugly. Yes, take it how
you want to take and I'm gonna take the darts
as they come. But at the end of the day,
here's my truth.
Speaker 2 (15:30):
And a lot of that has to do with the
fact that when he was a young boy in the closet,
he didn't see himself anywhere. He didn't see anything that
helped him to cope, Yeah, to help him deal with
the guilt, because he had a lot of guilt. So
that is also one of the reasons for him being
so transparent is that is he wanted, he wants to
be what he needed as a kid. So I found
(15:51):
that interesting and I saw one of the comments in
the YouTube post was that they said it was about
him saying that jay Z was the art tect of
his personality, which some people might find strange.
Speaker 1 (16:03):
But he is a fan of hip hop, like he
is a hip hop for He's used to take my show.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
He was breaking down for me like verbatim some of
my jay Z interviews, And it's not that strange to me,
and I do like the fact when he talks about
Jay and Jay being supportive of his career and it
being about the art, because I think for Gerard it
really is an artistic expression. As maybe hard as it
is for some people to watch, I think it really.
Speaker 1 (16:29):
Truly to him is his art.
Speaker 2 (16:31):
If you watch his even the special before this reality show,
it is something very artistic about the way in which
he delivers his specials. So anyway, definitely worth checking out.
If you haven't watched the whole episode, you should. It's
on YouTube right now and given show a chance, and
maybe maybe if you tried before the interview, you may
feel differently about it after hearing his full story. So
(16:55):
I loved him, especially as we're giving up by the
way for Pride. Pride starts June, right, yep, Yeah. I
liked that this conversation was our first. I love that
that's how we launched it. It was different. We hadn't
talked about it, we hadn't really talked about sexuality munch
in any other episodes, and so I really enjoyed this conversation.
I felt like I really learned a lot from him,
And if you haven't checked it, out yet. You should
(17:15):
absolutely do that, and we're getting ready to drop. Next
week we'll do a new episode.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
We are back.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
Irl is back our next episode. Should I say it
now in advance?
Speaker 1 (17:23):
Do it? Oh my gosh. We're pivoting a little bit
for sure every episode. But by the way, this season
is a lot of pivots. You think we're going in
one direction and we're gonna go somewhere else. On you.
Speaker 2 (17:38):
Our next episode is somebody that I admire a lot
to Sarah Jakes Roberts du Da DA d d DA.
Speaker 1 (17:46):
This is Tdjakes's daughter.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
Yep, very successful pastor, pregnant at the age of thirteen.
Could you be imagined being pregnant at the age of
thirteen and being the daughter of TD Jake's and he's
already TD Jakes, I'm a cover magazines. She is thirteen,
at home, pregnant and somehow winds up becoming a pastor.
(18:08):
So definitely check it out.
Speaker 1 (18:09):
We are back. Thank you to Gerard Carmichael for an
amazing conversation.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
If you haven't checked it out yet, please do and
stay tuned for our next episode and we will be
back right here. Thanks guys. Go to YouTube, subscribe, Edge
Martinez IRL
Host
Angie Martinez
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