January 1, 2025 • 24 mins
Hey y'all! You ever known some of your friend's family members were trifling but didn't know if you should just shut up and mind your business or say something? Well then this episode is for you! Tap in!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Can't beleeve Reckless, the production of iHeart Radio
and the Black Effects. And just like that, we're back
with yet another carefully reckless episode, which you girl, Jess
hilarious This sweek, Taylor is in here with me.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Say hi to Taylor, y'all says Hi, Taylor? Hi nice?
Sorry she beck y'all?
Speaker 1 (00:25):
All right, but I'm gonna read this time, and she's
just gonna help me fix the mess. All right, all right,
so we're gonna jump straight into it. What's good, Jess?
I need your opinion on something. Well, I need to
know if I'm right or wrong for this. So me
and my best friend have been best friends for about
twenty out of twenty two years of our life.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Okay, so you're twenty two. You met your best friend
at two, but do you remember that? Sure?
Speaker 3 (00:46):
Bet?
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Just being line of me like a motherfucker. It's all right,
g It's all good. It's a good which means we
are super close. We grew up in two different households.
Mine's mine's is not a word. Mine was more family
oriented and hers was more strict and discombobulated.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Sorry, but it's true.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
Growing up, her mom didn't really let her go anywhere,
and was also hard on her. I never understood why
my girl always had great grades. She's a great person,
and no one ever really had problems out of her.
Her mom used to talk about the way she dressed
and just belittled her in ways that wasn't too recognizable
until we got older. Even though our senior year graduation day,
(01:25):
her mother made her cry so bad because she didn't
want to take a picture with her m She said
she looked like she was about to sell some ass dumn.
Oh my gosh, and she actually looked really nice. Her
mother also sat in front of so many people. I
was so embarrassed for her. Just what the fuck she's said?
Speaker 2 (01:45):
Oh she's saying.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Her mother also said that in front of a whole
bunch of people, So she was just embarrassed.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
Okay, I got you. I got you.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
A week after she decided to move out, which I
helped her move into her new place just to get
a peace of mind. She always looked up to her mom,
so it how what the fuck how you look up
to a bitch like that?
Speaker 2 (02:02):
Damn she got a mother like, uh, what's the lady? Uh?
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Yeah, precious, And Carrie, I was going back to the
movie carrying shit, but yeah, definitely should. She always looked
up to her mom, so it was kind of hard
to see for herself how she was breaking her down.
That was just a little backstory, so it can help
back up what I'm about to.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Say, La Mayo. Okay, here you go.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
So now two years later, Bestie just bought her new home.
Of course I knew about it, but she wanted to
tell her mom at some surprising news.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
I already knew how that was about to go.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
So Bessie and I just came back from lunch and
went to pick her mom up so we can show
her the new place.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
Child. As soon as we pull up, she's like, who
else is this? This is yours?
Speaker 1 (02:44):
Bessie was so excited, like, yes, Ma, I gotta show
you the inside. Her mom gonna ask her who on
the lease and why why you need a house?
Speaker 2 (02:51):
So big girl. I just went back and sat in
the car.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
Hey, y'all, who you went back to the car minded
my business?
Speaker 2 (02:58):
Because like, what, why?
Speaker 1 (03:00):
What does it matter? Just be happy for your daughter. Damn, Yeah,
I definitely get it. But anyways, once she was done
showing her the house, which was an amazingly fast tour.
Speaker 2 (03:08):
By the way, first of all, she's twenty.
Speaker 1 (03:13):
House and right and you and you're not even right
about that, like you're not even looking at like your.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
Daughter grew up fast. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
It's like damn accomplishments early. So I know people in
their thirties and forties and even fifties who ain't got
their own house, and that's fucked up that she would
like overshadow all of that with questions and interrogating them.
All right, So after she showed her a fast tour,
she took her home. The drive was so awkward. Bessie
would try to engage with her mom and she would
just respond so short and nonchalant. As Bestie and I
(03:41):
drove home, I finally decided that it was time time
to tell her about how I felt about her mom.
To sum it up, I called her mom a hater
and said that she's been hating on her for years.
And Jess, when I say she went off on me,
she did. I don't know if she's just being in
the now or what it is, but it's definitely the
I wasn't trying to overstep, but that's exactly what I
(04:03):
felt like after telling her and whole time I'm just
trying to look out for her. She dropped me off
and we haven't spoken since. Damn, it's been a week.
We usually talk every day, and I just feel so bad.
I texted her a few times and now she's giving
me the cold shoulder, like I said some crazy shit
to her, when in all honesty, my intentions were genuine.
I need your honest opinion and feedback. What do you think?
(04:25):
Do you think I was wrong?
Speaker 2 (04:27):
First? And for almost No, I don't think you were wrong.
Y'all have been best.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
For instance, she was damned too, and that's crazy because
you remember that. But I don't think that you were wrong.
I've seen something like this before. But look, Tayl, I
got this new thing I do where somebody has written
me a story that I've never seen before, like because
you know people write similar stories all the time, right,
but I got to saying we got one. So that's
(04:52):
literally like where we at. I call this an exclusive story,
right because we've never heard anything like this before. On
jes fix my mess again? Like I said, I've known
people that has gone through this, and then we've even
seen movies like this.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
We've seen Precious. We've seen Carrie, we've seen other movies,
so she knew though.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, but you know, she still loved
her mother, you know what I'm saying. Yeah, she know
my mom wasn't good. Yeah, And you know what the
difference between Precious and that girl. Precious didn't go off
on nobody that told her that she didn't need to
be with her mother, you know what I mean. Yeah,
I don't know what that part is.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
Shut up, I don't know what.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
That part was about. But this is what I do think.
I think that your friend's mom is jealous of her. Well,
it could be one of two things, because I've seen this,
you know what I'm saying, I've seen this. It could
be that she hates the dad because sometimes people have kids,
Women have kids by men before getting to know them,
(05:50):
and then they realize that they don't want the kid,
but the kid is already here. You know, something happens
and you have this constant reminder of the person that
just took you through hell, the person that she don't
even know why you was pregnant by, and you know,
especially when they look like the motherfucker, it's like, you know,
(06:11):
while I understand that it's wrong. It's very wrong because
one the kid didn't next to be here, and you
willingly had the kid.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
You get what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
Just because something happened with the father does not mean
that that falls on the child. You know, so you
can't treat the child away because of who you conceived with.
I noticed that happens a lot. Like like I said,
I know people. And then the second thing, her childhood,
the mom's childhood. She could be projecting what her mom
did to her. You understand what I'm saying now, Sometimes
(06:42):
it goes different ways. Sometimes people get treated like shit
when they're younger, so all they want to do is
be good parents.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
To their kids.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
That's why most a lot of those people they want
families so they can give the family. They can give
their kids what they didn't have growing up. You know
what I'm saying, Like I do see it like that.
But sometimes your trauma can make you the very person
that you despise, you know what I'm saying. And and
you can actually yeah, basically just be like the person
(07:13):
that fucked you over. If you love me, you'll listen
to this commercial and then we'll be right back. So
I think either her mom didn't have a good upbringing,
you know, and this is just a generational thing, like
you know, and she's gonna have to break that cycle.
Your best friend, because she I still can't figure out
the defensive part other than she loves he mother like
(07:36):
she really just like it's like she sees the good
in her and she really is hoping that it changes
because she says she looks up to her.
Speaker 3 (07:44):
What do you think I know someone actually not necessarily
like that, but know one that I don't know how listen, Yeah,
has certain stuff that her mom did to her. This
is and you can mom has her on trauma. Yeah,
she didn't deal with but she see again her mom's
(08:04):
not like that where she kind of just keeps critiquing
her and her mom just got issues whatever. But I
don't think she did anything wrong. But I think she
needs to face the truth of how her mom acts
towards her though, And that's being her best friend. She's
understand and she's just trying to keep it real with her.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
And yeah, she's going to see things that she don't see.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
So yeah, and I think and what if she sees
it but she don't want to, Yeah, she don't want
to like she's in denial about it. It's like not
And when I say no, I mean like she's not
ready to open that can yet, you know what I mean, Like,
oh no, because like I said, she could still see
the good in her mom. Because m like even even
(08:47):
for Precious before Precious got fed up and she went
to that social worker And I forgot Mariy Caurry was
in that movie Mark Curry was gonna hot ass map.
I've never seen Mariah Carry look crazy like that. That's
why that's the only place that I can't believe Mariah
Carey agreed to look a hot ass mess like that
order play a social worker.
Speaker 3 (09:05):
Well we get off topic, but because remember she did
MTD Cribs and even how she was yes, like damn.
Speaker 1 (09:12):
Bit like we never seen her with a bad day,
so I know she probably like no, and this this
is just the rollttle bitch, Like you.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
Know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
But like, I have never seen Mariah Carry. That's what
I forgot. I forgot him. Like until you watch the Ship,
You're like, oh shit, Paula Patton was the teacher and
it's like, oh shit, Maroc Curry did look like she
was on crack, you know what I'm saying. But it
is what it is. You know, she's a very beautiful
woman and that's what it is. But and it's her
holiday right now, so shout out to Mariah Carey. But
(09:41):
even before Precious got set up with her mother, you
know what I'm saying, Like she right before she threw
that TV or piano or something she threw out the
window at her as a TV or something, right like
she Pruscianus was still trying to like help her mother
and shit and give her the benefit of the doubt
and Precious mom.
Speaker 2 (09:59):
And her her mom to like her. Yeah, it's like
her like yeah, neediness.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Mm hmm you do this so like me, yeah, because
it's your mom and you only get one, you know
what I mean. And it's like, yo, what am I
doing wrong? So kids start to blame themselves. The child
starts to blame themselves if they don't get help early
to realize this is not normal, you know, because if
you grow up like that, then this is normal to you.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
This is your normal. Yeah, thinking about like, yeah, that's
normal to her.
Speaker 3 (10:29):
Yeah, because she's like like she she acts like well, again,
I don't know if this is how her friend acts,
but like acts like okay if I do that, like
she's yeah yeah. It's like she's trying to get her
approval by everyone though, based off I think her.
Speaker 1 (10:46):
Friend yeah yeah, because like her wanting to take her
mom so bad to show that house off to her, like, yo, mom,
this is what I accomplished, and and she knows her mom.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
I don't know if she thought her mom would react
like that. I just think that she was.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
It's like, oh, maybe if I should her this house,
this is gonna make her love me, This is gonna
make her acknowledge me.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
This is gonna make you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
So maybe she's been spending her whole life trying to
prove herself because this is the normal that she's you
know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
But I why don't she never talk to her She
never talked to her friend about that though, Like they
as best friends, y'all.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
That's why I said, if y'all have been best friend
since too, why was she so defensive? I could see
if y'all just met, or y'all just been friends for
a few years, or you know, because then it'll be
a thing like you don't know my mom.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (11:29):
But you know, y'all was damn near like y'all were toddlers.
So it's like you've known this lady, you know, And
and I don't know. My best friend's mom is like
my mom too, you know. And my mom is like
my best friend's mom. And we haven't even been friends
best friends since we were too you know, So I'm
not sure why that is. But like I said, if
(11:52):
this is her normal, then maybe it's gonna take a
lot of like a lot more of this shit to
happen for her to realize it's wrong. Because again, she's
still only twenty two. I think she'll realize once she
is where's her dad? Like I need to know, like
who's her dad? Where's the dad? Give me some more
(12:12):
of the backs, or I want you to update me
on this friend, because I could figure it out more
if I knew the history with both parents, Like has
she ever opened up to you about her father? Has
she ever opened up to you about being treated a
certain way as a kid when y'all were friends but
you didn't live with her, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (12:31):
Who knows? You know?
Speaker 1 (12:32):
She could have been getting beaten every night, or she
could have been getting starved. The mother could have been
like telling them you're fat or whatever, and you know,
like just could have been. This could have started early on,
which makes it her normal life, you know. And then
how does your best friend look at you and your mother?
You know what I'm saying, Like, does she ever has
(12:52):
there ever been a moment where she well you even
saw her wishing that this could be her household, like
when you're around your parents and shit like that, And
has she ever been around that?
Speaker 2 (13:01):
You know, understand what I'm saying. We do all mother
even let out the house.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
But you know, like I like, uh, it's something there
that I need more context for to give full advice
on this shit, because I'm not gonna say she she
a little too old, but she old enough to notice
it's not right. Yeah, you know, you know, unless she's
(13:24):
just a diehard I got one mom, and I wonders, Yeah, yeah,
that as well, Like, yeah, was she the only one
treated like this? Was she the you know, the well
what child they always say is treated like the outcast?
Speaker 2 (13:43):
The middle child?
Speaker 3 (13:44):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (13:44):
Is she a middle child? Is she an only child?
Speaker 1 (13:46):
You know what I'm saying, which wouldn't matter if the
mom is fucked up anyway, because you know, because then
all the kids get treated fucked up. You know what
I'm saying, unless it's the dad thing. Like I said,
I just need more contacts on it. But I don't
think that you were wrong.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
I don't.
Speaker 1 (14:02):
I do think that you should reach out though this
this is your best friend since too.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
I think she did though she said you gave her
the shoulder.
Speaker 1 (14:10):
Oh she did all the ship. She haven't talked to
her in a week. She said, it's been a week
and then let.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
Me saying she reached out and she's just not got it.
Let me say, hold on, let me sing, let me sing,
me scroll on it.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Oh yeah, yeah, she dropped me off and that we
haven't spoken since it's been a week. We usually talk
every day, and I just feel so bad. I texted
her a few times and now she's giving me the
cold shoulder, like I really said some crazy shit to her. Okay, Okay,
I get it. I totally understand. Also, what nationality is she?
Speaker 2 (14:39):
Like? Is she black? White? Other?
Speaker 3 (14:41):
Like?
Speaker 2 (14:41):
What is she? Because not that that really really matters.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
But I don't know, I don't know. I'm not sure
the defensiveness. It seems like that would come out of
a white person before a black person. Hell yeah, I
went to a predominantly white high school and it was
a lot of my friends who had fucked up parents,
and they see nothing wrong with that. Up. Hold up,
I know this shit getting good, but listen to just
(15:05):
a couple seconds of a commercial. If you love me,
you'll listen. They see nothing wrong with their parents. Like yeah,
like listen, this is crazy. I remember in high school
I was like one of them. When I say predominantly white,
by high school was predominantly white. I went to Yeah,
I went to Dallastown. I went to school in Pennsylvania, York,
right outside of York. It was this county called Dallastown
(15:27):
and I went to Dallastown Area High School and it
was a middle high school or whatever, but it was
a huge campus. It looked like a fucking college. Like
it was huge, like a university. And of course I'm
in high school. When I first got there, I think
I was like one of like sixteen black kids, and
it was about from nine to eleven thousand kids in the.
Speaker 2 (15:45):
School, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
And it was different other races or whatever, foreign exchange
and all that, but it was predominantly Caucasian, and I
had friends, and once I got to be popular and
shit and all of that type of stuff, I developed
a strong friend group up there, and we would hook
school and go to my house and shit when it
was time to hook school, not when it was time,
(16:07):
but yeah, like we hated Thursdays, yo, because that was
science day and shit like, you know, So we would
hook on Thursdays. And I lived closer closest to the school,
so we would go right to my house. My mom
worked in Baltimore, so I knew when she was coming home,
and it would take her a while to get home.
So I'm like, oh, we can just look at my house.
Were smoking in the backyard and my mom had came home.
(16:27):
I didn't get in trouble the first time I got caught,
you know. She was just like, you don't need to
do that. She had like a nice, stern talk with
me in front of my friends, and she kissed me
on my forehead and she was like, I love you,
but don't fucking play with me, little girl.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
And that's the thing. I said, yes, ma'am, you know
what I mean.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
So my friend. I remember her, her name was Morgan Talbert.
She was like, your mom just told you she loved you.
And I'm like, yeah, you know what I'm saying. She
was like that's crazy, is it crazy?
Speaker 3 (16:54):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (16:54):
She was like interest like they they weren't affectionate with
their parents. Their parents weren't nurturing, they were just providing
for them. They were just they would give them money.
They wouldn't even see their kids half the time. A
lot of their parents traveled for work, so they wouldn't
even see their parents a lot, you know what I mean.
And then I had other friends that would look at
me like, ooh, you see your parents every day, like
(17:14):
you like your parents like talk to you all the time.
Like that doesn't get on your fucking nerves. I'm like, no,
they love me the fuck.
Speaker 4 (17:21):
Like that's interesting because the white people I went to,
I went to the white people that went to my school,
at least with my white friends, like the only thing
it was the stereotype.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
Though. I remember one.
Speaker 3 (17:33):
Time my friend Emily, she.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
She I don't know, her mom almost mad at her
about something.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
And we didn't give a fucking damn like and like
she was just like whatever, Mom, like.
Speaker 1 (17:45):
Just like fuck you outside she didn't they fuck you,
but she was like.
Speaker 3 (17:51):
Back talking to her. I remember stepping back like I
wouldn't not Yeah with her, she goes, maybe you should, yeah,
but her mom did not.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
She was not the one.
Speaker 1 (18:09):
Yeah yeah, yeah, And that's funny. One of my friend's
moms was like that, and rest in peace to her.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Now.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
She actually took her own life. She was dealing with
some mental issues. Yeah, but her name was, oh my god,
a Katie or Yvonne, I don't know, but either way, Alex,
that wasn't I'm like the fuck, yeah, Alex, that was
the name. She took her own fucking life, you know,
and she was dealing with that. But she was a
mother that did not play. She she had two kids,
and her daughter gave her. Her daughter was the youngest,
(18:38):
and her daughter gave her the most trouble. She will
whoop that little girl ass, like she will whoop her ass.
And that was the first time I ever seen or
even heard of a white one of my white friends
being chastised physically being disciplined.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
But my first time she her mom was like like.
Speaker 1 (18:56):
That, yeah, yeah her, that's the crazy thing, you know.
So I said that to say sharing my experience about
being in a predominantly white high school, because this speaks
to this girl's story, Like I wouldn't be surprised if
she was white, because but even if.
Speaker 3 (19:16):
She was, how you explained it, Like they just weren't there,
but their parents weren't treating.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
Them, weren't treating them.
Speaker 3 (19:23):
Right, Yeah, I think they'll be happy if she got
I'm sober. She got a house at twenty two, a
house at twenty two?
Speaker 2 (19:29):
What did you do for her job? I know I
need to know my best friend need to tell me.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
And shit, you know, I really want you to keep
reaching out to her though, because honestly, maybe she's not okay.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
You just yeah, you never know, and I think that
should be something that you should say. You should suggest
that to her to go to therapy. I man, of shit,
I lost my thought. I went all around the Marigo
bush and shit, just to let you know why I
say it and told you I.
Speaker 2 (19:52):
Went to a predominant white high school. It was a
thought there.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
But I'm gonna get into it pribabe next week or
some because I forgot you. I did the same shit
on the episode last week. But it is all right, man. Yeah,
I think that you should suggest therapy to her, some
type of family therapy. I doubt that her mom will go,
but she needs to go. It's still family therapy because
she's going to go in there and spill about her mom,
and maybe her hailing can motivate her mom to go.
(20:17):
You know what I'm saying, Because those type of people
you have to talk to a certain way, like her mother,
you have to.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
It's a certain way.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
You have to be a healed person to get to
show another person the mirror of themselves.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Like, Yo, what you're doing is fucked up. You're wrong,
and you're projecting on me.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
You've been projecting on me my whole life, and I'm
just now seeing as an adult, as a young adult,
but still an adult. Nevertheless, like this, you're not a
good mom to me, and I love you. I look
up to you, and.
Speaker 2 (20:46):
It's just like why what did I do?
Speaker 1 (20:48):
Like I need her to have these conversations with her mom,
but I do also want her to seek out therapy.
But I want her to have these conversations with her
mom because I doubt if she got mad at you
like that, she's ever questioned her mom about that.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
You know what I'm saying, because if you.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
Know your mom like that, I think the first person
I'm going to go show my house.
Speaker 3 (21:05):
Yeah, or she just also is in a sense wanted,
like she gotta protect her family.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
Yeah maybe yeah, yeah in that sense.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
Yeah, but definitely keep me updated, you know, because I
want to know.
Speaker 2 (21:19):
I want to know.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
And then that's your friend. You know, I know you
missed her and everything. So it's okay, you ain't. You
ain't losing nothing. Keep hitting her. Yeah, she's giving you
the coach show to pop up on her. You know,
go see her. That's your best sied. You know what
I'm saying. Best friends they do that, they do that sometimes,
and you have to do that.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
Sometimes you got to go pull up on a bitch.
What's up?
Speaker 1 (21:38):
Like, come on you you got mad at me. I'm
just looking out for your best interests.
Speaker 2 (21:42):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (21:43):
I've watched your mom basically try to destroy who you are.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
Almost your whole life.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
Like remember graduation, bitch, when you was crying fund all
those fucking people because your mom didn't want to take
a picture with you. She kept saying that she was
dressed like a uchi. Yeah, like no, like, tell her
that you've always been there. Just always just be there
if anything, even if she push you away, just be
there because she still needs somebody, you know what I'm saying.
And it's not the person who her mother is. She
(22:10):
needs her mother, but not the person who her mother
is right now. So the mother needs help too. But
she's a little too set in her ways and it's
gonna take a miracle to change who she is and
her age. So it is up to the best friend
to break that generational curse. So keep me updated, b
And just like that, we've come to yet the end
of another carefully reckless podcast. But your girl justcelarious and
my girl Taylor's here. Say thank you Taylor, and we
(22:31):
got one. Okay, it's the first assumption to follow directions.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
Yes, all right, now stay you welcome, Tailor, You're welcome,
all right, that's what's up. She was about to say,
you welcome Tailor. All right. I love y'all. Y'all will
hear from us next week.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
Peace Can't Believe Reckless is a production of iHeart Rate
(24:00):
Dio and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio,
visit the iHeartRadio app. Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen
to your favorite shows.
Welcome to Can't beleeve Reckless, the production of iHeart Radio
and the Black Effects. And just like that, we're back
with yet another carefully reckless episode, which you girl, Jess
hilarious This sweek, Taylor is in here with me.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Say hi to Taylor, y'all says Hi, Taylor? Hi nice?
Sorry she beck y'all?
Speaker 1 (00:25):
All right, but I'm gonna read this time, and she's
just gonna help me fix the mess. All right, all right,
so we're gonna jump straight into it. What's good, Jess?
I need your opinion on something. Well, I need to
know if I'm right or wrong for this. So me
and my best friend have been best friends for about
twenty out of twenty two years of our life.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Okay, so you're twenty two. You met your best friend
at two, but do you remember that? Sure?
Speaker 3 (00:46):
Bet?
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Just being line of me like a motherfucker. It's all right,
g It's all good. It's a good which means we
are super close. We grew up in two different households.
Mine's mine's is not a word. Mine was more family
oriented and hers was more strict and discombobulated.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Sorry, but it's true.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
Growing up, her mom didn't really let her go anywhere,
and was also hard on her. I never understood why
my girl always had great grades. She's a great person,
and no one ever really had problems out of her.
Her mom used to talk about the way she dressed
and just belittled her in ways that wasn't too recognizable
until we got older. Even though our senior year graduation day,
(01:25):
her mother made her cry so bad because she didn't
want to take a picture with her m She said
she looked like she was about to sell some ass dumn.
Oh my gosh, and she actually looked really nice. Her
mother also sat in front of so many people. I
was so embarrassed for her. Just what the fuck she's said?
Speaker 2 (01:45):
Oh she's saying.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Her mother also said that in front of a whole
bunch of people, So she was just embarrassed.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
Okay, I got you. I got you.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
A week after she decided to move out, which I
helped her move into her new place just to get
a peace of mind. She always looked up to her mom,
so it how what the fuck how you look up
to a bitch like that?
Speaker 2 (02:02):
Damn she got a mother like, uh, what's the lady? Uh?
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Yeah, precious, And Carrie, I was going back to the
movie carrying shit, but yeah, definitely should. She always looked
up to her mom, so it was kind of hard
to see for herself how she was breaking her down.
That was just a little backstory, so it can help
back up what I'm about to.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Say, La Mayo. Okay, here you go.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
So now two years later, Bestie just bought her new home.
Of course I knew about it, but she wanted to
tell her mom at some surprising news.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
I already knew how that was about to go.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
So Bessie and I just came back from lunch and
went to pick her mom up so we can show
her the new place.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
Child. As soon as we pull up, she's like, who
else is this? This is yours?
Speaker 1 (02:44):
Bessie was so excited, like, yes, Ma, I gotta show
you the inside. Her mom gonna ask her who on
the lease and why why you need a house?
Speaker 2 (02:51):
So big girl. I just went back and sat in
the car.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
Hey, y'all, who you went back to the car minded
my business?
Speaker 2 (02:58):
Because like, what, why?
Speaker 1 (03:00):
What does it matter? Just be happy for your daughter. Damn, Yeah,
I definitely get it. But anyways, once she was done
showing her the house, which was an amazingly fast tour.
Speaker 2 (03:08):
By the way, first of all, she's twenty.
Speaker 1 (03:13):
House and right and you and you're not even right
about that, like you're not even looking at like your.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
Daughter grew up fast. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
It's like damn accomplishments early. So I know people in
their thirties and forties and even fifties who ain't got
their own house, and that's fucked up that she would
like overshadow all of that with questions and interrogating them.
All right, So after she showed her a fast tour,
she took her home. The drive was so awkward. Bessie
would try to engage with her mom and she would
just respond so short and nonchalant. As Bestie and I
(03:41):
drove home, I finally decided that it was time time
to tell her about how I felt about her mom.
To sum it up, I called her mom a hater
and said that she's been hating on her for years.
And Jess, when I say she went off on me,
she did. I don't know if she's just being in
the now or what it is, but it's definitely the
I wasn't trying to overstep, but that's exactly what I
(04:03):
felt like after telling her and whole time I'm just
trying to look out for her. She dropped me off
and we haven't spoken since. Damn, it's been a week.
We usually talk every day, and I just feel so bad.
I texted her a few times and now she's giving
me the cold shoulder, like I said some crazy shit
to her, when in all honesty, my intentions were genuine.
I need your honest opinion and feedback. What do you think?
(04:25):
Do you think I was wrong?
Speaker 2 (04:27):
First? And for almost No, I don't think you were wrong.
Y'all have been best.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
For instance, she was damned too, and that's crazy because
you remember that. But I don't think that you were wrong.
I've seen something like this before. But look, Tayl, I
got this new thing I do where somebody has written
me a story that I've never seen before, like because
you know people write similar stories all the time, right,
but I got to saying we got one. So that's
(04:52):
literally like where we at. I call this an exclusive story,
right because we've never heard anything like this before. On
jes fix my mess again? Like I said, I've known
people that has gone through this, and then we've even
seen movies like this.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
We've seen Precious. We've seen Carrie, we've seen other movies,
so she knew though.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, but you know, she still loved
her mother, you know what I'm saying. Yeah, she know
my mom wasn't good. Yeah, And you know what the
difference between Precious and that girl. Precious didn't go off
on nobody that told her that she didn't need to
be with her mother, you know what I mean. Yeah,
I don't know what that part is.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
Shut up, I don't know what.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
That part was about. But this is what I do think.
I think that your friend's mom is jealous of her. Well,
it could be one of two things, because I've seen this,
you know what I'm saying, I've seen this. It could
be that she hates the dad because sometimes people have kids,
Women have kids by men before getting to know them,
(05:50):
and then they realize that they don't want the kid,
but the kid is already here. You know, something happens
and you have this constant reminder of the person that
just took you through hell, the person that she don't
even know why you was pregnant by, and you know,
especially when they look like the motherfucker, it's like, you know,
(06:11):
while I understand that it's wrong. It's very wrong because
one the kid didn't next to be here, and you
willingly had the kid.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
You get what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
Just because something happened with the father does not mean
that that falls on the child. You know, so you
can't treat the child away because of who you conceived with.
I noticed that happens a lot. Like like I said,
I know people. And then the second thing, her childhood,
the mom's childhood. She could be projecting what her mom
did to her. You understand what I'm saying now, Sometimes
(06:42):
it goes different ways. Sometimes people get treated like shit
when they're younger, so all they want to do is
be good parents.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
To their kids.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
That's why most a lot of those people they want
families so they can give the family. They can give
their kids what they didn't have growing up. You know
what I'm saying, Like I do see it like that.
But sometimes your trauma can make you the very person
that you despise, you know what I'm saying. And and
you can actually yeah, basically just be like the person
(07:13):
that fucked you over. If you love me, you'll listen
to this commercial and then we'll be right back. So
I think either her mom didn't have a good upbringing,
you know, and this is just a generational thing, like
you know, and she's gonna have to break that cycle.
Your best friend, because she I still can't figure out
the defensive part other than she loves he mother like
(07:36):
she really just like it's like she sees the good
in her and she really is hoping that it changes
because she says she looks up to her.
Speaker 3 (07:44):
What do you think I know someone actually not necessarily
like that, but know one that I don't know how listen, Yeah,
has certain stuff that her mom did to her. This
is and you can mom has her on trauma. Yeah,
she didn't deal with but she see again her mom's
(08:04):
not like that where she kind of just keeps critiquing
her and her mom just got issues whatever. But I
don't think she did anything wrong. But I think she
needs to face the truth of how her mom acts
towards her though, And that's being her best friend. She's
understand and she's just trying to keep it real with her.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
And yeah, she's going to see things that she don't see.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
So yeah, and I think and what if she sees
it but she don't want to, Yeah, she don't want
to like she's in denial about it. It's like not
And when I say no, I mean like she's not
ready to open that can yet, you know what I mean, Like,
oh no, because like I said, she could still see
the good in her mom. Because m like even even
(08:47):
for Precious before Precious got fed up and she went
to that social worker And I forgot Mariy Caurry was
in that movie Mark Curry was gonna hot ass map.
I've never seen Mariah Carry look crazy like that. That's
why that's the only place that I can't believe Mariah
Carey agreed to look a hot ass mess like that
order play a social worker.
Speaker 3 (09:05):
Well we get off topic, but because remember she did
MTD Cribs and even how she was yes, like damn.
Speaker 1 (09:12):
Bit like we never seen her with a bad day,
so I know she probably like no, and this this
is just the rollttle bitch, Like you.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
Know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
But like, I have never seen Mariah Carry. That's what
I forgot. I forgot him. Like until you watch the Ship,
You're like, oh shit, Paula Patton was the teacher and
it's like, oh shit, Maroc Curry did look like she
was on crack, you know what I'm saying. But it
is what it is. You know, she's a very beautiful
woman and that's what it is. But and it's her
holiday right now, so shout out to Mariah Carey. But
(09:41):
even before Precious got set up with her mother, you
know what I'm saying, Like she right before she threw
that TV or piano or something she threw out the
window at her as a TV or something, right like
she Pruscianus was still trying to like help her mother
and shit and give her the benefit of the doubt
and Precious mom.
Speaker 2 (09:59):
And her her mom to like her. Yeah, it's like
her like yeah, neediness.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Mm hmm you do this so like me, yeah, because
it's your mom and you only get one, you know
what I mean. And it's like, yo, what am I
doing wrong? So kids start to blame themselves. The child
starts to blame themselves if they don't get help early
to realize this is not normal, you know, because if
you grow up like that, then this is normal to you.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
This is your normal. Yeah, thinking about like, yeah, that's
normal to her.
Speaker 3 (10:29):
Yeah, because she's like like she she acts like well, again,
I don't know if this is how her friend acts,
but like acts like okay if I do that, like
she's yeah yeah. It's like she's trying to get her
approval by everyone though, based off I think her.
Speaker 1 (10:46):
Friend yeah yeah, because like her wanting to take her
mom so bad to show that house off to her, like, yo, mom,
this is what I accomplished, and and she knows her mom.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
I don't know if she thought her mom would react
like that. I just think that she was.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
It's like, oh, maybe if I should her this house,
this is gonna make her love me, This is gonna
make her acknowledge me.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
This is gonna make you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
So maybe she's been spending her whole life trying to
prove herself because this is the normal that she's you
know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
But I why don't she never talk to her She
never talked to her friend about that though, Like they
as best friends, y'all.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
That's why I said, if y'all have been best friend
since too, why was she so defensive? I could see
if y'all just met, or y'all just been friends for
a few years, or you know, because then it'll be
a thing like you don't know my mom.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (11:29):
But you know, y'all was damn near like y'all were toddlers.
So it's like you've known this lady, you know, And
and I don't know. My best friend's mom is like
my mom too, you know. And my mom is like
my best friend's mom. And we haven't even been friends
best friends since we were too you know, So I'm
not sure why that is. But like I said, if
(11:52):
this is her normal, then maybe it's gonna take a
lot of like a lot more of this shit to
happen for her to realize it's wrong. Because again, she's
still only twenty two. I think she'll realize once she
is where's her dad? Like I need to know, like
who's her dad? Where's the dad? Give me some more
(12:12):
of the backs, or I want you to update me
on this friend, because I could figure it out more
if I knew the history with both parents, Like has
she ever opened up to you about her father? Has
she ever opened up to you about being treated a
certain way as a kid when y'all were friends but
you didn't live with her, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (12:31):
Who knows? You know?
Speaker 1 (12:32):
She could have been getting beaten every night, or she
could have been getting starved. The mother could have been
like telling them you're fat or whatever, and you know,
like just could have been. This could have started early on,
which makes it her normal life, you know. And then
how does your best friend look at you and your mother?
You know what I'm saying, Like, does she ever has
(12:52):
there ever been a moment where she well you even
saw her wishing that this could be her household, like
when you're around your parents and shit like that, And
has she ever been around that?
Speaker 2 (13:01):
You know, understand what I'm saying. We do all mother
even let out the house.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
But you know, like I like, uh, it's something there
that I need more context for to give full advice
on this shit, because I'm not gonna say she she
a little too old, but she old enough to notice
it's not right. Yeah, you know, you know, unless she's
(13:24):
just a diehard I got one mom, and I wonders, Yeah, yeah,
that as well, Like, yeah, was she the only one
treated like this? Was she the you know, the well
what child they always say is treated like the outcast?
Speaker 2 (13:43):
The middle child?
Speaker 3 (13:44):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (13:44):
Is she a middle child? Is she an only child?
Speaker 1 (13:46):
You know what I'm saying, which wouldn't matter if the
mom is fucked up anyway, because you know, because then
all the kids get treated fucked up. You know what
I'm saying, unless it's the dad thing. Like I said,
I just need more contacts on it. But I don't
think that you were wrong.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
I don't.
Speaker 1 (14:02):
I do think that you should reach out though this
this is your best friend since too.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
I think she did though she said you gave her
the shoulder.
Speaker 1 (14:10):
Oh she did all the ship. She haven't talked to
her in a week. She said, it's been a week
and then let.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
Me saying she reached out and she's just not got it.
Let me say, hold on, let me sing, let me sing,
me scroll on it.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Oh yeah, yeah, she dropped me off and that we
haven't spoken since it's been a week. We usually talk
every day, and I just feel so bad. I texted
her a few times and now she's giving me the
cold shoulder, like I really said some crazy shit to her. Okay, Okay,
I get it. I totally understand. Also, what nationality is she?
Speaker 2 (14:39):
Like? Is she black? White? Other?
Speaker 3 (14:41):
Like?
Speaker 2 (14:41):
What is she? Because not that that really really matters.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
But I don't know, I don't know. I'm not sure
the defensiveness. It seems like that would come out of
a white person before a black person. Hell yeah, I
went to a predominantly white high school and it was
a lot of my friends who had fucked up parents,
and they see nothing wrong with that. Up. Hold up,
I know this shit getting good, but listen to just
(15:05):
a couple seconds of a commercial. If you love me,
you'll listen. They see nothing wrong with their parents. Like yeah,
like listen, this is crazy. I remember in high school
I was like one of them. When I say predominantly white,
by high school was predominantly white. I went to Yeah,
I went to Dallastown. I went to school in Pennsylvania, York,
right outside of York. It was this county called Dallastown
(15:27):
and I went to Dallastown Area High School and it
was a middle high school or whatever, but it was
a huge campus. It looked like a fucking college. Like
it was huge, like a university. And of course I'm
in high school. When I first got there, I think
I was like one of like sixteen black kids, and
it was about from nine to eleven thousand kids in the.
Speaker 2 (15:45):
School, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
And it was different other races or whatever, foreign exchange
and all that, but it was predominantly Caucasian, and I
had friends, and once I got to be popular and
shit and all of that type of stuff, I developed
a strong friend group up there, and we would hook
school and go to my house and shit when it
was time to hook school, not when it was time,
(16:07):
but yeah, like we hated Thursdays, yo, because that was
science day and shit like, you know, So we would
hook on Thursdays. And I lived closer closest to the school,
so we would go right to my house. My mom
worked in Baltimore, so I knew when she was coming home,
and it would take her a while to get home.
So I'm like, oh, we can just look at my house.
Were smoking in the backyard and my mom had came home.
(16:27):
I didn't get in trouble the first time I got caught,
you know. She was just like, you don't need to
do that. She had like a nice, stern talk with
me in front of my friends, and she kissed me
on my forehead and she was like, I love you,
but don't fucking play with me, little girl.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
And that's the thing. I said, yes, ma'am, you know
what I mean.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
So my friend. I remember her, her name was Morgan Talbert.
She was like, your mom just told you she loved you.
And I'm like, yeah, you know what I'm saying. She
was like that's crazy, is it crazy?
Speaker 3 (16:54):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (16:54):
She was like interest like they they weren't affectionate with
their parents. Their parents weren't nurturing, they were just providing
for them. They were just they would give them money.
They wouldn't even see their kids half the time. A
lot of their parents traveled for work, so they wouldn't
even see their parents a lot, you know what I mean.
And then I had other friends that would look at
me like, ooh, you see your parents every day, like
(17:14):
you like your parents like talk to you all the time.
Like that doesn't get on your fucking nerves. I'm like, no,
they love me the fuck.
Speaker 4 (17:21):
Like that's interesting because the white people I went to,
I went to the white people that went to my school,
at least with my white friends, like the only thing
it was the stereotype.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
Though. I remember one.
Speaker 3 (17:33):
Time my friend Emily, she.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
She I don't know, her mom almost mad at her
about something.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
And we didn't give a fucking damn like and like
she was just like whatever, Mom, like.
Speaker 1 (17:45):
Just like fuck you outside she didn't they fuck you,
but she was like.
Speaker 3 (17:51):
Back talking to her. I remember stepping back like I
wouldn't not Yeah with her, she goes, maybe you should, yeah,
but her mom did not.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
She was not the one.
Speaker 1 (18:09):
Yeah yeah, yeah, And that's funny. One of my friend's
moms was like that, and rest in peace to her.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Now.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
She actually took her own life. She was dealing with
some mental issues. Yeah, but her name was, oh my god,
a Katie or Yvonne, I don't know, but either way, Alex,
that wasn't I'm like the fuck, yeah, Alex, that was
the name. She took her own fucking life, you know,
and she was dealing with that. But she was a
mother that did not play. She she had two kids,
and her daughter gave her. Her daughter was the youngest,
(18:38):
and her daughter gave her the most trouble. She will
whoop that little girl ass, like she will whoop her ass.
And that was the first time I ever seen or
even heard of a white one of my white friends
being chastised physically being disciplined.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
But my first time she her mom was like like.
Speaker 1 (18:56):
That, yeah, yeah her, that's the crazy thing, you know.
So I said that to say sharing my experience about
being in a predominantly white high school, because this speaks
to this girl's story, Like I wouldn't be surprised if
she was white, because but even if.
Speaker 3 (19:16):
She was, how you explained it, Like they just weren't there,
but their parents weren't treating.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
Them, weren't treating them.
Speaker 3 (19:23):
Right, Yeah, I think they'll be happy if she got
I'm sober. She got a house at twenty two, a
house at twenty two?
Speaker 2 (19:29):
What did you do for her job? I know I
need to know my best friend need to tell me.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
And shit, you know, I really want you to keep
reaching out to her though, because honestly, maybe she's not okay.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
You just yeah, you never know, and I think that
should be something that you should say. You should suggest
that to her to go to therapy. I man, of shit,
I lost my thought. I went all around the Marigo
bush and shit, just to let you know why I
say it and told you I.
Speaker 2 (19:52):
Went to a predominant white high school. It was a
thought there.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
But I'm gonna get into it pribabe next week or
some because I forgot you. I did the same shit
on the episode last week. But it is all right, man. Yeah,
I think that you should suggest therapy to her, some
type of family therapy. I doubt that her mom will go,
but she needs to go. It's still family therapy because
she's going to go in there and spill about her mom,
and maybe her hailing can motivate her mom to go.
(20:17):
You know what I'm saying, Because those type of people
you have to talk to a certain way, like her mother,
you have to.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
It's a certain way.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
You have to be a healed person to get to
show another person the mirror of themselves.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Like, Yo, what you're doing is fucked up. You're wrong,
and you're projecting on me.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
You've been projecting on me my whole life, and I'm
just now seeing as an adult, as a young adult,
but still an adult. Nevertheless, like this, you're not a
good mom to me, and I love you. I look
up to you, and.
Speaker 2 (20:46):
It's just like why what did I do?
Speaker 1 (20:48):
Like I need her to have these conversations with her mom,
but I do also want her to seek out therapy.
But I want her to have these conversations with her
mom because I doubt if she got mad at you
like that, she's ever questioned her mom about that.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
You know what I'm saying, because if you.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
Know your mom like that, I think the first person
I'm going to go show my house.
Speaker 3 (21:05):
Yeah, or she just also is in a sense wanted,
like she gotta protect her family.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
Yeah maybe yeah, yeah in that sense.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
Yeah, but definitely keep me updated, you know, because I
want to know.
Speaker 2 (21:19):
I want to know.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
And then that's your friend. You know, I know you
missed her and everything. So it's okay, you ain't. You
ain't losing nothing. Keep hitting her. Yeah, she's giving you
the coach show to pop up on her. You know,
go see her. That's your best sied. You know what
I'm saying. Best friends they do that, they do that sometimes,
and you have to do that.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
Sometimes you got to go pull up on a bitch.
What's up?
Speaker 1 (21:38):
Like, come on you you got mad at me. I'm
just looking out for your best interests.
Speaker 2 (21:42):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (21:43):
I've watched your mom basically try to destroy who you are.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
Almost your whole life.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
Like remember graduation, bitch, when you was crying fund all
those fucking people because your mom didn't want to take
a picture with you. She kept saying that she was
dressed like a uchi. Yeah, like no, like, tell her
that you've always been there. Just always just be there
if anything, even if she push you away, just be
there because she still needs somebody, you know what I'm saying.
And it's not the person who her mother is. She
(22:10):
needs her mother, but not the person who her mother
is right now. So the mother needs help too. But
she's a little too set in her ways and it's
gonna take a miracle to change who she is and
her age. So it is up to the best friend
to break that generational curse. So keep me updated, b
And just like that, we've come to yet the end
of another carefully reckless podcast. But your girl justcelarious and
my girl Taylor's here. Say thank you Taylor, and we
(22:31):
got one. Okay, it's the first assumption to follow directions.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
Yes, all right, now stay you welcome, Tailor, You're welcome,
all right, that's what's up. She was about to say,
you welcome Tailor. All right. I love y'all. Y'all will
hear from us next week.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
Peace Can't Believe Reckless is a production of iHeart Rate
(24:00):
Dio and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio,
visit the iHeartRadio app. Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen
to your favorite shows.
Host
Jess Hilarious
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