February 26, 2025 • 17 mins
Welcome to a new season of Dear Chiquis, a podcast where I answer questions from my listeners. This week, an anonymous listener doesn’t know what to do after she recently had a baby and her husband told her he’s not as attracted to her anymore; Alex wants to support his dad’s new relationship but feels like he’d be betraying his late mother; Natalia is curious about how I take care of my body while drinking alcohol; and Sasha wants my advice on how to properly forgive her mom.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
Hello, everyone, it's your big sister Cheeky's and you've reached
my personal voicemailbox for the Dear Cheeky's podcast. I'm here
to give you a device on anything and everything you
need help with. Whether you're going through a breakup or
having issues with your family, or maybe you have a
question about my personal life. Whatever the case is, I
want to hear from you. Remember these are my thoughts
(00:39):
in my opinions, and if you're suffering from a serious
issue or hardship, you should seek help from a qualified professional.
All right, now, go ahead and leave your message at
the sound of the beeB.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Hi Cheeky's.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
I hope you're having a great day. I just want
to start off by saying that I am a first
time momy of six months postpart and I recently had
an important conversation with my husband and I expressed my
feelings on how we've been prioritizing our daughter since she
was born and have forgotten our marriage. I've told him
(01:12):
that we haven't had sex and he hasn't been affectionate
towards me, and he pretty much told me, do you
want me to tell you a harsh way or a
nice way? And He's the type to say things how
they are and nothing that the way he says I
might hurt the other person. So he told me that
he finds me less attractive, that I've gained weight, that
(01:35):
I haven't been the same since we first started dating
seven years ago. So I can't help but to feel
insecure now and feel like I'm forcing sex and I
just don't want it to be forced. You pretty much
gave me an ultimatum. But what advice could he give me?
Because I feel like I'm stuck.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
Oh my goodness, my anonymous listener. Okay, men, not all men,
but I feel like a lot of men don't understand
what us women go through, especially a woman that carried
a baby for nine months. Your body changes, your hormones change,
(02:22):
It takes your body a year at least to get
back to quote unquote normal, and then again, you probably
won't ever be the same because you have just given
life to his child. You have given him the best
gift ever. And look, I appreciate the honesty from him
(02:46):
because he could have lied, and but I just feel
like it's very inconsiderate of him. I hope that you've
tried to explain to him what postpartum is if not
have him hopefully like google it and and read on
how true this is. And of course you're gonna gain
(03:06):
weight of course because you just had a baby. Look,
I think you should definitely put yourself first. Of course,
you have a child. I think it is important. I'm
glad that you brought it up, like, hey, things have changed,
(03:27):
like you're not as affectionate with me, et cetera, et cetera,
like since we had our daughter, because it is important
to make sure you cater to your relationship and not
forget about that. But if he's not willing to do
his part, and just because you've gained some weight and
understand that this is gonna it's gonna take some time,
then I think you also need to start thinking about
(03:49):
what your future may look like without him. If things
don't change, try having another conversation with him and letting
him know that you know, yes, you do your part
as well. You know, like now you're gonna start feeling
a little better and doing whatever you can energy wise
to you know, get on the treadmill and start losing weight,
(04:10):
like you have to do your part, you know, for
yourself first and foremost. But you also want to be
with the person that's gonna love you through thick and thin,
literally okay, and that's going to really understand you and
your process and appreciate you more than anything. I'm not
telling you to leave this person because you just had
a baby with them, but I just I don't know.
(04:31):
I think I don't know if he's the right person,
because if he was, he would be there with you,
holding you and doing what he can to make you
feel better because you just gave him the best gift ever, priceless.
And I'm just I'm disappointed in him, to be honest,
and I don't want you to feel bad or feel like,
oh so I did something wrong? Like no, like this dude, No,
(04:55):
I hope you don't feel bad and don't question yourself
as a woman. You need a more supportive partner and
he needs to get hit shit together. To be honest,
I'm sending you a big ass hug, you got this,
do what you can to make yourself feel better, and
a y'aiell try checking his phone too. Sorry, I just
(05:16):
I don't know. I have this feeling, okay. Anyways, I'm
not trying to put things in your head. I'm just like,
I don't know, this doesn't feel right in my heart,
but I could be wrong. Anyways, thank you for your question. Okay,
I'm sending you all the positive vibes. Okay, so let's
move on to the next question that comes from Alex.
Speaker 4 (05:36):
Hi girl, I'm a huge fan. I listen to your music,
your podcast, I see everything. But my question to you is,
I lost my mom about three years ago to cancer,
and I thought I was at a good spot. I
am at a good spot. I've accepted everything, and you know,
I'm happy that she's not in this world suffering from
(05:57):
her disease anymore. But recently, my dad has moved on
and he has a partner, and I'm really struggling to
grasp with that reality now. And it's kind of like
stirred up new emotions that I didn't even know were there.
I thought I was over it. You know, I'm very
happy for him, but I feel like some resentment. I
(06:21):
feel like I've been putting him at a distance. I
just feel like supporting him any further would kind of
be like backstabbing my mom. So I just wanted to
see what you would recommend for me in my situation.
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
Oh my goodness, Alex, I hear the pain in your voice,
and it actually made my like, I don't know, my
eyes are getting watery because I can hear the pain
in your voice. But look, I know that you feel
like I need to defend my mom. I have to
(06:59):
have her and I can't let this new person in
or support my dad because that's kind of like, like
you said, turning my back on my mom. But that's
not the case. And I know this is hard. I
know it's hard, but what I've realized is that men
can't be alone. No sabin is that's hollows and you
can't hold that against your dad. It's going to take
(07:22):
some time, and I think that you should start by first,
not if you don't want to welcome her into your
heart yet or get to know her or any of
that yet that I respect that, and I think you
need to do that when you're ready, but I definitely
feel that you need to start praying for strength and
understanding and wisdom to understand also that your dad does
(07:43):
need a partner. And it's okay, you know, because your
mom is in heaven and she's in a better place,
and she's probably super happy, and she probably has a
boyfriend of her own in heaven, and it's okay for
your dad. He's not doing anything wrong. And I feel
like if you don't find it in your heart to
support him, it's going to cause more space, more distance
(08:04):
between you guys, and then that's ultimately going to hurt you.
You know, it's kind of like leaning into your dad
and that's the parent that you have here, and loving
him and supporting him through this decision is definitely going
to take a weight off your shoulders and also a
weight off his. So it's going to take time. Don't
force it, don't pressure yourself to do anything that you
(08:24):
don't want to do. But just know that your mom
is fine, and I'm sure she's happy for your dad
because she wants him to be happy. You know, ultimately,
I truly believe that. So again, just take your time
and have a conversation with your dad. I know it's
probably difficult, but just tell him. You know, it hurts
my feelings for my mom, but I want to be
(08:46):
there for you, and you know, just if you can
just also give me grace in my process, but hopefully
that helps. And I'm like, oh, I want to hug
you right now. You keep me in, you know, keep
me updated, let us know what you decided. But don't
feel like you're doing anything to backstab your mom because
(09:09):
that's not the case. I'm pretty sure she she wants
your daddy to be happy. Kay, okay, guys, next question
comes from Natalia.
Speaker 5 (09:24):
Hi Cheek's I literally love you. I'm currently on episode
six of CHIK. I had to pay for the subscription
just to watch your TV show, but I do it
all over again. So my question for you is I
am watching on the TV show that you know you
drink with your girlfriends at your concerts. I've also been
to many of your concerts as well, and you're pretty
(09:44):
wasted at the concert. I still had so much fun, though,
So my question is how do you consume that amount
of alcohol without even looking like you do when I drink,
I need like a full week to recover. But you
your skin is flawless, it's clear, it's beautiful, your body
is tea. So how do you maintain your parents your
(10:08):
figure while still consuming alcohol? Because I mean, we all
know that alcohol is not the greatest for our bodies,
but how do you do it so well? I love you?
Speaker 2 (10:17):
Bye?
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Oh Natalia, You're so cute. Thank you so much. I
appreciate your support and your love. This is a great
question because this is something I've been battling with for
a long time because the truth is that for a
long time I didn't drink as much, and then I
started getting on stage, and then I really really, really
like tequila. I'm not a type of I'm not the
(10:38):
type of girl to drink like sweet drinks or anything
like that. I kind of drink like a dude, So
I think that's why I'm able to kind of hold
my own and I drink a lot of water in between.
So I again, straight up tequila a shot taker, and
that helps me with not gaining that much weight. Although
alcohol does stop you from burning fat for forty eight hours,
(11:00):
I believe it is after you consume it. So yes,
it's not the best for our bodies. It's not the
best for our brains. And this is why I've been
struggling because I'm like, I know this, but I like
how I feel temporarily, but then I'm like, I need
to love myself more because long term it's not good
for me. That's a whole other conversation, a whole other
episode that we'll get into, but definitely drink a lot
(11:23):
of water in between before you go to sleep. This
is one thing I do. I take my multi vitamin
and a vitamin B twelve and that helps me just
you know, nourish my body while I'm sleeping and I
feel better. It's rare when I have a hangover, and
I think, as far as me looking like I'm not
that drunk, it's because here's a secret in my bottle,
(11:44):
especially on stage, because I want to be present as
much as possible. I water down my tequila. So I'm
drinking tequila, but I water it down so I can
hydrate myself at the same time. And of course I
have my little bottle of water there. So it's I
think more than anything, it's staying hydrated and you know,
knowing like what your limit is. And then I try
not to drink every day unless I you know, for work.
(12:09):
I'm like, okay, it's kind of part of my job,
so I kind of have to, you know, because I
have that fun with you guys. But during the week
and stuff like that, I'm not like a huge, huge drinker.
I'll have a drink here and there. But yeah, my
long term goal, short term goal long term forever or
I don't know. Again, we'll get into it later, but
I want to stop drinking completely. Yeah I know how,
(12:30):
I don't know because I love tequila. But anyways, thank
you for your question, Natalia, and yeah, hydrate girl, hydrate
and drink your multivitamin is very important. Okay. Last question,
guys comes from Sasha.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
Hi Tikis, just want to say that you've been a
really big inspiration to me. I read like both of
your books within like two weeks of each other, and
I just want to say thank you for you know,
being my inspiration. You've kind of helping me try and
let go to you know, forgive some people, but I
kind of just wanted some advice. I feel like I've
(13:09):
forgiven my mom, but I feel like I haven't. So
my mom was addicted to drugs and she was in
and out of my life a lot, and you know,
it wasn't really there for me growing up, and I
just had my dad and my brothers, and I feel
like I have forgiven her, but at the same time,
I haven't, just because I feel like I mean to
(13:29):
her sometimes for no reason, and I just she gets
on my nerves a lot, and I feel like I'm
just nice to her because you know, I have my son,
and I just want to see, like what kind of
advice you have to give me, like as to like
how to like really truly forgive her and just be
like nicer to her, you know. But I just want
(13:50):
to say thank you so much for being an inspiration.
I love your music. I listen to you every morning
on the way to work. Thank you by.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
Oh, thank you Sasha. Thank you for your loving your support,
especially with my music and my podcasts and all that
good stuff. Okay, So in regards to your mama, it
feels to me, it sounds to me that you may
have to heal your inner child because I think as
an adult, like, you know, Okay, I forgive my mom,
(14:19):
I'm good, But then it's your inner child that still
holds a little bit of resentment because you probably didn't
have the best childhood because your mom was addicted to drugs.
You can't hold that against her, though, because that's not
going to help you move forward in your life either.
I know it's a lot easier said than done. I understand,
(14:40):
I get it, but that resentment is toxic for you,
and you have to tap in and pray for that
inner child that was neglected, and be compassionate with your mother,
be compassionate with yourself. And it's going to take some time,
but I think the more you practice it the better,
(15:01):
because living in the past, one foot in the past,
one foot forward is not going to help you move
forward faster or as fast as you could. You get me,
so it's like it's kind of keeping you stagnant. So
I think you kind of just have to tell yourself,
you know what, I'm willing. I want to start fresh.
(15:23):
It's a new slate with my mom and I because
I think you probably snap at her because you're angry,
you know, And I get that, but that's still your mom,
especially if she's apologized and if she's clean now, like
everyone deserves a second chance and a second opportunity, and
especially from her children, you know, especially if she wants
(15:45):
to be in your life and she's trying to correct things.
I don't know, these are the questions that you have
to answer. But I always say this, forgiving is a
gift for yourself and not holding that resentment, holding that
baggage for the rest of your life, Like you know,
you have to be like, you know what, have compassion
for your mom. You don't know what she was going through,
the things that she needs to heal, and if she
wasn't the best mom to you, then now she can be.
(16:08):
You have to give her that opportunity and that clean slate.
That's my suggestion. Just pray and pray for that little
girl inside of you and just hug her and say, Okay,
it's okay, everything's fine. Your mom wasn't there, but now
she is, and little by little you can work on that,
on that relationship. I think it's possible. So anyways, keep
me updated. Okay, all of you, thank you so much
(16:29):
for your questions and I hope that I was able
to help in some way. And I love you guys. Okay,
and for those of you that have a question or
a comment or you need some advice, please leave your
question at speakpipe dot com slash Cheekys and Chill podcast.
That is speakpipe dot com slash cheeks and Chill podcast.
I'll catch you here on the next episode of Dear Cheeky.
(16:56):
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Hello, everyone, it's your big sister Cheeky's and you've reached
my personal voicemailbox for the Dear Cheeky's podcast. I'm here
to give you a device on anything and everything you
need help with. Whether you're going through a breakup or
having issues with your family, or maybe you have a
question about my personal life. Whatever the case is, I
want to hear from you. Remember these are my thoughts
(00:39):
in my opinions, and if you're suffering from a serious
issue or hardship, you should seek help from a qualified professional.
All right, now, go ahead and leave your message at
the sound of the beeB.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Hi Cheeky's.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
I hope you're having a great day. I just want
to start off by saying that I am a first
time momy of six months postpart and I recently had
an important conversation with my husband and I expressed my
feelings on how we've been prioritizing our daughter since she
was born and have forgotten our marriage. I've told him
(01:12):
that we haven't had sex and he hasn't been affectionate
towards me, and he pretty much told me, do you
want me to tell you a harsh way or a
nice way? And He's the type to say things how
they are and nothing that the way he says I
might hurt the other person. So he told me that
he finds me less attractive, that I've gained weight, that
(01:35):
I haven't been the same since we first started dating
seven years ago. So I can't help but to feel
insecure now and feel like I'm forcing sex and I
just don't want it to be forced. You pretty much
gave me an ultimatum. But what advice could he give me?
Because I feel like I'm stuck.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
Oh my goodness, my anonymous listener. Okay, men, not all men,
but I feel like a lot of men don't understand
what us women go through, especially a woman that carried
a baby for nine months. Your body changes, your hormones change,
(02:22):
It takes your body a year at least to get
back to quote unquote normal, and then again, you probably
won't ever be the same because you have just given
life to his child. You have given him the best
gift ever. And look, I appreciate the honesty from him
(02:46):
because he could have lied, and but I just feel
like it's very inconsiderate of him. I hope that you've
tried to explain to him what postpartum is if not
have him hopefully like google it and and read on
how true this is. And of course you're gonna gain
(03:06):
weight of course because you just had a baby. Look,
I think you should definitely put yourself first. Of course,
you have a child. I think it is important. I'm
glad that you brought it up, like, hey, things have changed,
(03:27):
like you're not as affectionate with me, et cetera, et cetera,
like since we had our daughter, because it is important
to make sure you cater to your relationship and not
forget about that. But if he's not willing to do
his part, and just because you've gained some weight and
understand that this is gonna it's gonna take some time,
then I think you also need to start thinking about
(03:49):
what your future may look like without him. If things
don't change, try having another conversation with him and letting
him know that you know, yes, you do your part
as well. You know, like now you're gonna start feeling
a little better and doing whatever you can energy wise
to you know, get on the treadmill and start losing weight,
(04:10):
like you have to do your part, you know, for
yourself first and foremost. But you also want to be
with the person that's gonna love you through thick and thin,
literally okay, and that's going to really understand you and
your process and appreciate you more than anything. I'm not
telling you to leave this person because you just had
a baby with them, but I just I don't know.
(04:31):
I think I don't know if he's the right person,
because if he was, he would be there with you,
holding you and doing what he can to make you
feel better because you just gave him the best gift ever, priceless.
And I'm just I'm disappointed in him, to be honest,
and I don't want you to feel bad or feel like,
oh so I did something wrong? Like no, like this dude, No,
(04:55):
I hope you don't feel bad and don't question yourself
as a woman. You need a more supportive partner and
he needs to get hit shit together. To be honest,
I'm sending you a big ass hug, you got this,
do what you can to make yourself feel better, and
a y'aiell try checking his phone too. Sorry, I just
(05:16):
I don't know. I have this feeling, okay. Anyways, I'm
not trying to put things in your head. I'm just like,
I don't know, this doesn't feel right in my heart,
but I could be wrong. Anyways, thank you for your question. Okay,
I'm sending you all the positive vibes. Okay, so let's
move on to the next question that comes from Alex.
Speaker 4 (05:36):
Hi girl, I'm a huge fan. I listen to your music,
your podcast, I see everything. But my question to you is,
I lost my mom about three years ago to cancer,
and I thought I was at a good spot. I
am at a good spot. I've accepted everything, and you know,
I'm happy that she's not in this world suffering from
(05:57):
her disease anymore. But recently, my dad has moved on
and he has a partner, and I'm really struggling to
grasp with that reality now. And it's kind of like
stirred up new emotions that I didn't even know were there.
I thought I was over it. You know, I'm very
happy for him, but I feel like some resentment. I
(06:21):
feel like I've been putting him at a distance. I
just feel like supporting him any further would kind of
be like backstabbing my mom. So I just wanted to
see what you would recommend for me in my situation.
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
Oh my goodness, Alex, I hear the pain in your voice,
and it actually made my like, I don't know, my
eyes are getting watery because I can hear the pain
in your voice. But look, I know that you feel
like I need to defend my mom. I have to
(06:59):
have her and I can't let this new person in
or support my dad because that's kind of like, like
you said, turning my back on my mom. But that's
not the case. And I know this is hard. I
know it's hard, but what I've realized is that men
can't be alone. No sabin is that's hollows and you
can't hold that against your dad. It's going to take
(07:22):
some time, and I think that you should start by first,
not if you don't want to welcome her into your
heart yet or get to know her or any of
that yet that I respect that, and I think you
need to do that when you're ready, but I definitely
feel that you need to start praying for strength and
understanding and wisdom to understand also that your dad does
(07:43):
need a partner. And it's okay, you know, because your
mom is in heaven and she's in a better place,
and she's probably super happy, and she probably has a
boyfriend of her own in heaven, and it's okay for
your dad. He's not doing anything wrong. And I feel
like if you don't find it in your heart to
support him, it's going to cause more space, more distance
(08:04):
between you guys, and then that's ultimately going to hurt you.
You know, it's kind of like leaning into your dad
and that's the parent that you have here, and loving
him and supporting him through this decision is definitely going
to take a weight off your shoulders and also a
weight off his. So it's going to take time. Don't
force it, don't pressure yourself to do anything that you
(08:24):
don't want to do. But just know that your mom
is fine, and I'm sure she's happy for your dad
because she wants him to be happy. You know, ultimately,
I truly believe that. So again, just take your time
and have a conversation with your dad. I know it's
probably difficult, but just tell him. You know, it hurts
my feelings for my mom, but I want to be
(08:46):
there for you, and you know, just if you can
just also give me grace in my process, but hopefully
that helps. And I'm like, oh, I want to hug
you right now. You keep me in, you know, keep
me updated, let us know what you decided. But don't
feel like you're doing anything to backstab your mom because
(09:09):
that's not the case. I'm pretty sure she she wants
your daddy to be happy. Kay, okay, guys, next question
comes from Natalia.
Speaker 5 (09:24):
Hi Cheek's I literally love you. I'm currently on episode
six of CHIK. I had to pay for the subscription
just to watch your TV show, but I do it
all over again. So my question for you is I
am watching on the TV show that you know you
drink with your girlfriends at your concerts. I've also been
to many of your concerts as well, and you're pretty
(09:44):
wasted at the concert. I still had so much fun, though,
So my question is how do you consume that amount
of alcohol without even looking like you do when I drink,
I need like a full week to recover. But you
your skin is flawless, it's clear, it's beautiful, your body
is tea. So how do you maintain your parents your
(10:08):
figure while still consuming alcohol? Because I mean, we all
know that alcohol is not the greatest for our bodies,
but how do you do it so well? I love you?
Speaker 2 (10:17):
Bye?
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Oh Natalia, You're so cute. Thank you so much. I
appreciate your support and your love. This is a great
question because this is something I've been battling with for
a long time because the truth is that for a
long time I didn't drink as much, and then I
started getting on stage, and then I really really, really
like tequila. I'm not a type of I'm not the
(10:38):
type of girl to drink like sweet drinks or anything
like that. I kind of drink like a dude, So
I think that's why I'm able to kind of hold
my own and I drink a lot of water in between.
So I again, straight up tequila a shot taker, and
that helps me with not gaining that much weight. Although
alcohol does stop you from burning fat for forty eight hours,
(11:00):
I believe it is after you consume it. So yes,
it's not the best for our bodies. It's not the
best for our brains. And this is why I've been
struggling because I'm like, I know this, but I like
how I feel temporarily, but then I'm like, I need
to love myself more because long term it's not good
for me. That's a whole other conversation, a whole other
episode that we'll get into, but definitely drink a lot
(11:23):
of water in between before you go to sleep. This
is one thing I do. I take my multi vitamin
and a vitamin B twelve and that helps me just
you know, nourish my body while I'm sleeping and I
feel better. It's rare when I have a hangover, and
I think, as far as me looking like I'm not
that drunk, it's because here's a secret in my bottle,
(11:44):
especially on stage, because I want to be present as
much as possible. I water down my tequila. So I'm
drinking tequila, but I water it down so I can
hydrate myself at the same time. And of course I
have my little bottle of water there. So it's I
think more than anything, it's staying hydrated and you know,
knowing like what your limit is. And then I try
not to drink every day unless I you know, for work.
(12:09):
I'm like, okay, it's kind of part of my job,
so I kind of have to, you know, because I
have that fun with you guys. But during the week
and stuff like that, I'm not like a huge, huge drinker.
I'll have a drink here and there. But yeah, my
long term goal, short term goal long term forever or
I don't know. Again, we'll get into it later, but
I want to stop drinking completely. Yeah I know how,
(12:30):
I don't know because I love tequila. But anyways, thank
you for your question, Natalia, and yeah, hydrate girl, hydrate
and drink your multivitamin is very important. Okay. Last question,
guys comes from Sasha.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
Hi Tikis, just want to say that you've been a
really big inspiration to me. I read like both of
your books within like two weeks of each other, and
I just want to say thank you for you know,
being my inspiration. You've kind of helping me try and
let go to you know, forgive some people, but I
kind of just wanted some advice. I feel like I've
(13:09):
forgiven my mom, but I feel like I haven't. So
my mom was addicted to drugs and she was in
and out of my life a lot, and you know,
it wasn't really there for me growing up, and I
just had my dad and my brothers, and I feel
like I have forgiven her, but at the same time,
I haven't, just because I feel like I mean to
(13:29):
her sometimes for no reason, and I just she gets
on my nerves a lot, and I feel like I'm
just nice to her because you know, I have my son,
and I just want to see, like what kind of
advice you have to give me, like as to like
how to like really truly forgive her and just be
like nicer to her, you know. But I just want
(13:50):
to say thank you so much for being an inspiration.
I love your music. I listen to you every morning
on the way to work. Thank you by.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
Oh, thank you Sasha. Thank you for your loving your support,
especially with my music and my podcasts and all that
good stuff. Okay, So in regards to your mama, it
feels to me, it sounds to me that you may
have to heal your inner child because I think as
an adult, like, you know, Okay, I forgive my mom,
(14:19):
I'm good, But then it's your inner child that still
holds a little bit of resentment because you probably didn't
have the best childhood because your mom was addicted to drugs.
You can't hold that against her, though, because that's not
going to help you move forward in your life either.
I know it's a lot easier said than done. I understand,
(14:40):
I get it, but that resentment is toxic for you,
and you have to tap in and pray for that
inner child that was neglected, and be compassionate with your mother,
be compassionate with yourself. And it's going to take some time,
but I think the more you practice it the better,
(15:01):
because living in the past, one foot in the past,
one foot forward is not going to help you move
forward faster or as fast as you could. You get me,
so it's like it's kind of keeping you stagnant. So
I think you kind of just have to tell yourself,
you know what, I'm willing. I want to start fresh.
(15:23):
It's a new slate with my mom and I because
I think you probably snap at her because you're angry,
you know, And I get that, but that's still your mom,
especially if she's apologized and if she's clean now, like
everyone deserves a second chance and a second opportunity, and
especially from her children, you know, especially if she wants
(15:45):
to be in your life and she's trying to correct things.
I don't know, these are the questions that you have
to answer. But I always say this, forgiving is a
gift for yourself and not holding that resentment, holding that
baggage for the rest of your life, Like you know,
you have to be like, you know what, have compassion
for your mom. You don't know what she was going through,
the things that she needs to heal, and if she
wasn't the best mom to you, then now she can be.
(16:08):
You have to give her that opportunity and that clean slate.
That's my suggestion. Just pray and pray for that little
girl inside of you and just hug her and say, Okay,
it's okay, everything's fine. Your mom wasn't there, but now
she is, and little by little you can work on that,
on that relationship. I think it's possible. So anyways, keep
me updated. Okay, all of you, thank you so much
(16:29):
for your questions and I hope that I was able
to help in some way. And I love you guys. Okay,
and for those of you that have a question or
a comment or you need some advice, please leave your
question at speakpipe dot com slash Cheekys and Chill podcast.
That is speakpipe dot com slash cheeks and Chill podcast.
I'll catch you here on the next episode of Dear Cheeky.
(16:56):
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podcast Network. Follow us on Instagram at Michaeldura Podcasts and
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Host
Chiquis
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