February 5, 2025 • 10 mins
Someone who's trying to hold their head high after a breakup, a bad choice addict who loves too much, and a mom struggling to figuring our how to blend a family full of tempermental teenagers. Oh, what to do?! ~ Delilah
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hey it's Delilah. Thank you for stopping by. I have
put together some of my favorite radio moments here to
share with you on our daily podcast. Every night on
my radio show, we have Delilah's dilemmas. We love them all.
(00:24):
When you call or you write with a situation that
you're in and you just need a little advice and direction,
we love them all, and today we wanted to share
some of them with you on Hey It's Delilah. Marie
wrote to me and says, my barely ex boyfriend just
came home from overseas. He came home about a month ago,
(00:47):
and I was so excited after not seeing him for
a year. Everything was going well. I got to spend
time with him. I was so so happy he was
finally home. Well, a week ago, he broke the news
to me that he was back with his ex, who
he was engaged to previously during the time they were together,
(01:07):
she cheated on him. Now, I've been fine up until
this point. I've kept it together and kept my head up,
pretending like everything was fine, except tonight. Tonight is finally
getting to me and I'm breaking down emotionally and I
don't know what to do. It hurts bad, and although
this isn't my first breakup, it's definitely the hardest I've
(01:30):
ever been through. I just pretend like everything is fine
and nothing bothers me, but I can't do it anymore.
Please help me. From Marie Ah, Marie, I will help
you in just a moment. Tonight's Delilah's Dilemma is from Marie,
(01:53):
who wrote to a young man was involved with him
while he was overseas. He came home to her loving
eyes arms and then told her that he was going
back to his ex. And she's pretending like everything is fine. Honey,
everything is not fine. You have been betrayed in the
worst way, and you've put your life on hold, hoping
(02:16):
and planning for a future with somebody who was involved
with somebody else, obviously during the time that he's been away.
So stop pretending like it's okay, Stop pretending like your
heart isn't broken, and cry and let your tears out
and let your pain out and call your best friends
(02:37):
and have some been and Jerry's ice cream with them,
and then move on because you deserve to be loved
completely by somebody who just wants to spoil you. Okay,
So you can have my shoulder. My virtual should review
(03:00):
the radio to cry on God bless you. Tonight's Delilah's
Dilemma is from someone who is making bad choices because
she loves too much. Jessica writes, I am twenty six
(03:23):
with a beautiful baby girl. I am very much in
love with both her and her daddy, but he has
a bad drug habit. Because of his drug habit, we
have lost everything. I am still so stupid in love
that I keep taking him back. I know it's not
good for me or my baby girl. Please tell me
(03:43):
how to let go and do good for me and
my kylie Bug. Thank you so much from Jessica. Jessica,
I will have my mother delilah response for you coming
up next. Tonight's Delilah's Dilemma is from somebody who is
(04:09):
stupid in love. Yes, you are, Jessica. You are stupid
in love because you are doing stupid things that could
cost you the life of your child, or it could
cost you CPS coming taking your child, or it could
cost you your child being messed up for the rest
of her life. Jessica, you need to go to nar Anon.
(04:31):
Nar Ann is a organization, a group I don't want
to call it an organization meetings for people who love,
people who love their drugs more than themselves or their children.
People who are addicted to drugs, be it prescription drugs,
be it over the counter drugs, be it street drugs.
(04:52):
People who are addicted to OxyContin, to painkillers, to pot
to whatever, cannot make sound choices. They cannot make good decisions.
They cannot be good parents while they're using drugs. And
because you are so addicted to this man, you are
(05:16):
not being a good parent to your baby. You are
putting your baby at risk, at risk of being hurt, killed,
taken by CPS. You are putting your baby at risk
because you are as addicted to the drug addict as
the drug addict is addicted to drugs. So please, for
your baby's sake, stop. If you don't love yourself, Jessica,
(05:41):
and I get that because when I was your age
with a baby, I didn't love myself and I was
addicted to a drug addict. If you don't love yourself,
I get that. But at least, for God's sakes, love
your baby enough to not put her in harm's way.
Go to narin On or go to alan On. Go
to a counselor and figure out why you are addicted
(06:06):
to an addict, and then start making good choices for
you and your Kylie Bug. She deserves it. Here is
tonight's Delilah's Dilemma. Becky writes, I fell in love with
(06:27):
the most amazing man almost seven years ago. We dated
for three years before we decided to marry, and I
was afraid of making a mistake. My husband has one son.
I have three children. His son lived with his mother
and my kids live with their dad. Well, we just
recently moved out of state and my sixteen year old
daughter moved in with me and my husband. That was
(06:49):
last summer and last fall. His nineteen year old son
had to repeat a senior year, so he moved here
with us to go to school. His parents felt he
needed to get away from the people he was hanging
out with, so we took him in since my daughter
was here. What else could I say? He and his
father never really got along, and five months later, all
they do is fight all the time. I'm not talking
(07:12):
about a little arguing. I can deal with that, but fighting.
As a mother, I don't feel my daughter or I
should be subjected to this craziness. We are planning on
moving back home in the summer. I'm not sure if
I can wait that long. I really need to get
me and my daughter away from this craziness. I told
my husband something tonight that tore me up. I told him,
(07:35):
if I knew it would be like this with him
and his son, I never would have decided to get married.
This is a man that I've longed to find all
my life. We were best friends, we share everything. But
my stepson cursed me out today, and I just think
it's about time for my husband to decide him or me.
I need some serious advice, Mama Delilah, help from Becky. Becky,
(08:00):
I will be back with my insights my response to
your Delilah dilemma coming up next. If you were listening
a moment ago, I got a letter from Becky who
has married a man that has an adult son, and
that adult son has moved in with them and is
(08:22):
causing all sorts of mayhem in the household. And Becky,
here's what I would say. When a child is a child,
it's the parent's responsibility to provide for that child. But
when a child is an adult and your step son
is then that child is responsible, that adults is responsible
(08:43):
for making their way in the world. And it sounds
like he moved in with good intentions to complete school
and to get away from some negative influences, but he
brought with him a whole lot of behavior that is
not acceptable. You cannot live in a household where there
is physical fighting going on. So I support you one
(09:06):
hundred percent in saying I can't live this way. I
cannot live under these conditions. But I'm suspecting your husband
is feeling extremely guilty because he was not the custodial parent,
and there's nothing in this world quite as strong as
parent guilt. Before you pack your bags, Becky and head out,
have you thought about saying to your husband, can we
(09:27):
go talk to a counselor can we get some input
from somebody who's objective. Can we talk to somebody who's
an expert at helping families stay together. You need somebody
who can help you see all the different nuances and
all the different things going on and can really give
you some sound wisdom and advice. That's my best advice.
(09:54):
I so hope you have enjoyed these radio moments as
much as I enjoy bringing them to you. I'll share
more with you each weekday on Hey It's Delilah l
Hey it's Delilah. Thank you for stopping by. I have
put together some of my favorite radio moments here to
share with you on our daily podcast. Every night on
my radio show, we have Delilah's dilemmas. We love them all.
(00:24):
When you call or you write with a situation that
you're in and you just need a little advice and direction,
we love them all, and today we wanted to share
some of them with you on Hey It's Delilah. Marie
wrote to me and says, my barely ex boyfriend just
came home from overseas. He came home about a month ago,
(00:47):
and I was so excited after not seeing him for
a year. Everything was going well. I got to spend
time with him. I was so so happy he was
finally home. Well, a week ago, he broke the news
to me that he was back with his ex, who
he was engaged to previously during the time they were together,
(01:07):
she cheated on him. Now, I've been fine up until
this point. I've kept it together and kept my head up,
pretending like everything was fine, except tonight. Tonight is finally
getting to me and I'm breaking down emotionally and I
don't know what to do. It hurts bad, and although
this isn't my first breakup, it's definitely the hardest I've
(01:30):
ever been through. I just pretend like everything is fine
and nothing bothers me, but I can't do it anymore.
Please help me. From Marie Ah, Marie, I will help
you in just a moment. Tonight's Delilah's Dilemma is from Marie,
(01:53):
who wrote to a young man was involved with him
while he was overseas. He came home to her loving
eyes arms and then told her that he was going
back to his ex. And she's pretending like everything is fine. Honey,
everything is not fine. You have been betrayed in the
worst way, and you've put your life on hold, hoping
(02:16):
and planning for a future with somebody who was involved
with somebody else, obviously during the time that he's been away.
So stop pretending like it's okay, Stop pretending like your
heart isn't broken, and cry and let your tears out
and let your pain out and call your best friends
(02:37):
and have some been and Jerry's ice cream with them,
and then move on because you deserve to be loved
completely by somebody who just wants to spoil you. Okay,
So you can have my shoulder. My virtual should review
(03:00):
the radio to cry on God bless you. Tonight's Delilah's
Dilemma is from someone who is making bad choices because
she loves too much. Jessica writes, I am twenty six
(03:23):
with a beautiful baby girl. I am very much in
love with both her and her daddy, but he has
a bad drug habit. Because of his drug habit, we
have lost everything. I am still so stupid in love
that I keep taking him back. I know it's not
good for me or my baby girl. Please tell me
(03:43):
how to let go and do good for me and
my kylie Bug. Thank you so much from Jessica. Jessica,
I will have my mother delilah response for you coming
up next. Tonight's Delilah's Dilemma is from somebody who is
(04:09):
stupid in love. Yes, you are, Jessica. You are stupid
in love because you are doing stupid things that could
cost you the life of your child, or it could
cost you CPS coming taking your child, or it could
cost you your child being messed up for the rest
of her life. Jessica, you need to go to nar Anon.
(04:31):
Nar Ann is a organization, a group I don't want
to call it an organization meetings for people who love,
people who love their drugs more than themselves or their children.
People who are addicted to drugs, be it prescription drugs,
be it over the counter drugs, be it street drugs.
(04:52):
People who are addicted to OxyContin, to painkillers, to pot
to whatever, cannot make sound choices. They cannot make good decisions.
They cannot be good parents while they're using drugs. And
because you are so addicted to this man, you are
(05:16):
not being a good parent to your baby. You are
putting your baby at risk, at risk of being hurt, killed,
taken by CPS. You are putting your baby at risk
because you are as addicted to the drug addict as
the drug addict is addicted to drugs. So please, for
your baby's sake, stop. If you don't love yourself, Jessica,
(05:41):
and I get that because when I was your age
with a baby, I didn't love myself and I was
addicted to a drug addict. If you don't love yourself,
I get that. But at least, for God's sakes, love
your baby enough to not put her in harm's way.
Go to narin On or go to alan On. Go
to a counselor and figure out why you are addicted
(06:06):
to an addict, and then start making good choices for
you and your Kylie Bug. She deserves it. Here is
tonight's Delilah's Dilemma. Becky writes, I fell in love with
(06:27):
the most amazing man almost seven years ago. We dated
for three years before we decided to marry, and I
was afraid of making a mistake. My husband has one son.
I have three children. His son lived with his mother
and my kids live with their dad. Well, we just
recently moved out of state and my sixteen year old
daughter moved in with me and my husband. That was
(06:49):
last summer and last fall. His nineteen year old son
had to repeat a senior year, so he moved here
with us to go to school. His parents felt he
needed to get away from the people he was hanging
out with, so we took him in since my daughter
was here. What else could I say? He and his
father never really got along, and five months later, all
they do is fight all the time. I'm not talking
(07:12):
about a little arguing. I can deal with that, but fighting.
As a mother, I don't feel my daughter or I
should be subjected to this craziness. We are planning on
moving back home in the summer. I'm not sure if
I can wait that long. I really need to get
me and my daughter away from this craziness. I told
my husband something tonight that tore me up. I told him,
(07:35):
if I knew it would be like this with him
and his son, I never would have decided to get married.
This is a man that I've longed to find all
my life. We were best friends, we share everything. But
my stepson cursed me out today, and I just think
it's about time for my husband to decide him or me.
I need some serious advice, Mama Delilah, help from Becky. Becky,
(08:00):
I will be back with my insights my response to
your Delilah dilemma coming up next. If you were listening
a moment ago, I got a letter from Becky who
has married a man that has an adult son, and
that adult son has moved in with them and is
(08:22):
causing all sorts of mayhem in the household. And Becky,
here's what I would say. When a child is a child,
it's the parent's responsibility to provide for that child. But
when a child is an adult and your step son
is then that child is responsible, that adults is responsible
(08:43):
for making their way in the world. And it sounds
like he moved in with good intentions to complete school
and to get away from some negative influences, but he
brought with him a whole lot of behavior that is
not acceptable. You cannot live in a household where there
is physical fighting going on. So I support you one
(09:06):
hundred percent in saying I can't live this way. I
cannot live under these conditions. But I'm suspecting your husband
is feeling extremely guilty because he was not the custodial parent,
and there's nothing in this world quite as strong as
parent guilt. Before you pack your bags, Becky and head out,
have you thought about saying to your husband, can we
(09:27):
go talk to a counselor can we get some input
from somebody who's objective. Can we talk to somebody who's
an expert at helping families stay together. You need somebody
who can help you see all the different nuances and
all the different things going on and can really give
you some sound wisdom and advice. That's my best advice.
(09:54):
I so hope you have enjoyed these radio moments as
much as I enjoy bringing them to you. I'll share
more with you each weekday on Hey It's Delilah l
Host
Delilah
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