July 31, 2025 • 42 mins
On today’s episode, Karen covers castaway Philip Ashton.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:16):
Hello, and welcome my Favorite Murder.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
That's Georgia Hartstar, that's Karen Kilgarriff, and we're here to
do a little bit of podcasting for you, just.
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A little like a side of podcasting.
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One of those small ramikins, cute breadcrumbs on the top.
Torch it burn it a little and that's really all
you need.
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Crunchy and cheesy podcasting.
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Don't forget your podcast stomach is only this bit.
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Are you hungry?
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I don't know who knows anymore?
Speaker 1 (00:44):
I mean truly. I mean, so we're doing some solo episodes.
I feel like we should just talk about it, like
we're planning this huge tour. We have our researchers, they
have a lot of work, and so we're just gonna
kind of do some solos so we can catch up
on all of that.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
Reminder, these are free.
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It's summer. These are free. We are human beings with lives,
trying to live lives at least a little bit, and
going on tour for you, fucking going on tour. Yeah,
go to my Favorite Murder dot com slash live and
get your tickets if you want them.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
This is there a couple left. There's a couple other.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
Speaking of I think we should also say, like there
are no plans for tours in the future. You guys
like this is I don't see myself touring again after this.
So if you're on the fence about.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
It, I thought you said you were going to be
a stand up good luck.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
I mean no, thank you. Yeah, get your tickets.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Yeah, that's a threat direct, it's kind of a threat.
It's an absolute threat.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
It's a warning. It's just information that I feel like
we should give people.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Absolutely, here's more information we should give people. One of
the biggest we can call it fights that you've ever
seen on this Podcasndle a scandal. It's a scandal. I
think it's something that you didn't realize. It's going to
say something very political, but instead I'll say this this Thanksgiving,
we promise you there's something new to fight about. And
it is who is right in the sister's wedding argument,
(02:05):
Big sister or little sister and the people have spoken.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Yeah, So Minniesode four forty four, you and I discussed
an email that came in about wedding drama because we'd
asked for wedding drama and this little sister wrote in
about how high maintenance her big sister was being because
the little sister was going to have her wedding two
months after the big sister's wedding. And I thought that
(02:29):
that was fine, you understood the big sister side. And
so we took a poll.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
Yeah, right, a poll that almost twelve thousand people responded to. Like,
when I first heard these poll results, I'm like, what
is that three hundred people? There's no roy, There's no
way I'm wrong to that level.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
Yeah, you're right, I see eleven K, eleven point nine K.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Eleven point nine thousand people were like, I have an opinion.
And so the results are in this poll, after twelve
thousand people basically responded, seventy nine percent were in favor
of the little sister and only twenty one percent we're
on the big sister side.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
That's a big margin.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
It's a big margin.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
And so that is for the people who say, stick
to true crime. Why do you fucking talk in the
beginning of the that's for you. Eleven point nine Why
I angry today?
Speaker 2 (03:15):
I love it. Get it out. Let everybody know. But
here's the thing. If we could stick to true crime,
we would have done it nine and a half years ago.
We're not. The argument's over, just like this argument is over.
The people have voted on the Little Sister Georgia's side.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
So we posted a clip of the debate to Instagram
and TikTok, and we also got a lot of comments,
which is of course what we actually want, what we're
looking for. Yeah, so someone says it's a little sister.
This is classic bratty little siss behavior. That's from TikTok
from I can make another username, it's their user name.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
Oh yeah, well, a very good point that and dot
m dot z makes on Instagram, which is the military
is no joke when it comes to leave little Sister
all the way. So very good point.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
What Molly did, which was really smart as gave me
your side arguments and you my side arguments.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Yes, we simply must understand what the other side was
talking about.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Here's a long one. This is from Instagram from Test Jagger. Wells,
I'm going with both in the wrong. The younger sister
pissed me off with the way she worded the whole thing.
You don't get to unilaterally decide that this will be
fun for you and your sister. And I didn't like
the way she talked about her sister's relationship, like that
wedding matters less because they've been together and engaged for
(04:29):
a while.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Yeah, okay, fair, there's a lot of that kind of stuff,
but kind of similarly ashton underscore with underscore and underscore
e So ashton Ian said, how is this the most
divisive content you've ever posted? I cannot decide. I'm an
older sister, but dot dot dot can we get both perspectives?
Speaker 1 (04:52):
Lol? Oh my god? Huh? Bethany and TikTok said six
months apart is the correct answer.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
I love that one. It okay, just like we've saw
Mitch m I c h dot Some said, these sisters
can afford weddings in this economy. Very good point.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
This phrase my blood pressure. I read every comment and
I still can't decide.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
Someone knows shit. Shelby said, is there a secret third
sister we can side? I bet there is.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
I bet there is. And she's like, I'm staying fucking
out of this little sister taking both sides, taking either side.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
Yeah, she basically hates both them equally and thinks they're
both wrong equally.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
Yeah, so what do you think? Let us know?
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I mean This was a fun. If you didn't hear
about it, you can go watch the clip because you
will have a very definitive opinion.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Definitely, just definitive and definite.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Looking for those big sisters arguers you want to come
and show up, Only the little sister showed up, which
is very little sisters.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
They're all on social media. The little sisters are the
social media ones they do have. But my ones are
on Facebook. The little ones are on TikTok and Instagram. Right,
fite me argue with me about that.
Speaker 2 (05:56):
Okay, I can't figure out how to log onto Instagram.
That's like me with my Is it a Finsta? I
had a Finsta and I couldn't remember what fake a
name I used, right, and I just never used it again.
I think I ha'd some Kevin something I tried to go.
It's so random, so fake. Yeah, no one would ever suspect.
And it's like they don't because I can't log on Classic. So,
(06:20):
because this was such a popular interaction both here on
the show and then of course content wise on other platforms,
we decided we should have a more pick aside where
George and I argue for or against whatever is going on. So,
if you have something going on in your family, especially
right now between you and your sister especially or friend
(06:41):
of course or whoever. Yeah, just something you can't settle,
Please don't make it. Don't bring us into any kind
of a legal area, and.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
Don't plase your decision on what we say either. This
is not legally binding.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Whatever we say, that's right, Our advice is not a
professional or reasonable.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
We're barely doctors.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
We just passed those that last bar exam. So we
want to help you, and we mostly want to argue,
and we probably won't and we won't help you. We'll
help ourselves arg you to you been great? All right?
We have a podcast network. You want to talk about it.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Sure, We are so excited and proud you've heard us
talk about it. We are so proud to welcome our
newest podcast. It's about cults. It's called Trust Me to
the Exactly Right Family. On their premiere episode, Lola and
Megan sit down with artist and writer Aqina Cox, who
shares her experience growing up in the Unification Church, also
(07:37):
known as the Moonies, from mass weddings to unpaid labor
and Reverend Moon surprising ties to American politics. This is
the first part of an incredible two part series. New
episodes of Trust Me are every Wednesday. Please rate, review, subscribe.
Speaker 2 (07:52):
Then over on Bananas, We've got Curtain, Scottie talking about
a Florida man who celebrated his birthday by doing meth,
stealing a tour train and then going ahead and picking
up some passengers to give that tour.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
It's nice of him, that's community service.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
And then over on Ghost and Ross's Gag to welcome
back filmmaker, writer and drag queen icon Peaches Christ legend legend,
but to talk about stigmata, a mysterious piece of Jesus
toast and new discoveries surrounding the unsolved death of legendary
drag queen Heckleina.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
In case you missed it, We're going on tour you
may have missed. At the beginning of this, I be
guilty of you into buying tickets. Some shows are sold out.
Lots of shows actually are sold out, more than half. Yeah,
So if you want to come see us live, go
grab your tickets at my favorite murder dot com slash Live.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
All right, so this is your solo episode.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
That's right. So with solo episodes, we pick stories that
are fun. I would say, Okay, I like fun.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
Mine for the next episode is not fun.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
Yeah, we picked differently. Yeah, but this one especially is
very very thematically off target in a way, but very interesting.
And we've done these kinds of stories before. This one
starts June fifteenth, seventeen twenty two.
Speaker 1 (09:12):
Oh Wow, oh way back machine.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
And it starts off the south western coast of modern
day Nova Scotia at a settlement called Port Roseway. There's
a group of six fishermen from New England. Their ship,
the Milton, is anchored at that port after a long
day's work. Among those six men is a nineteen year
old from Massachusetts named Philip Ashton. Philip is exhausted, as
(09:37):
is the rest of the Milton's crew, because it's a
grueling job, of course, beyond the usual difficulties of these
labor intensive fishing expeditions. Philip, who is a weak swimmer,
fell overboard a few days prior, and his shipmate and
childhood friend, Joseph Libby actually pulled him out of the water,
thank god, because Philip would have drowned otherwise. So Philip
(10:00):
and Joseph and the rest of the crew are ready
for some r and R before they have to continue
on that journey. But there are thirteen other vessels anchoring
near Port Roseway at the moment, everybody's ready for some
r and R. But then the Milton crew sees a
fourteenth vessel entering this port. It's a large ship with
two masts. That's called the Brigantine.
Speaker 1 (10:22):
You knew I must.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
So Philip and his shipmates watch this bigger Brigantine boat
drop a smaller boat, and now that boat is rowing
straight for the Milton. So Philip and the rest of
the crew don't really think much of it because they
figure that the crew on the Brigantine just want to
see other human faces after a long time at sea.
(10:45):
Maybe hear the latest news from the American colonies, you know, get.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
The updates, the little gossip.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
Wouldn't that be nice after like three years at sea
and you're.
Speaker 1 (10:53):
Just like, oh my god, I'm sick of these fucking people.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
Get me away from these nerds. So it turns out
that's not the case at all. They're not just a
boat full of gossips. These strangers board the Milton brandishing
pistols and cutlasses, and after the initial shock wears off,
Philip and the rest of the crew realize that they're
dealing with every eighteenth centuries see Traveler's Worst Nightmare pirates.
(11:19):
These pirates easily overpower the six man Milton crew and
force them to board their brigantine. And once that's done,
they bored every other vessel anchored in Port Roseway and
they take all those crews hostage as well.
Speaker 1 (11:32):
Nobody there's thirteen other boats, and nobody fought back, no.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Because they're all doing that same thing of like, oh,
look at these guys in a rowboat. I think rowboats
aren't that scary?
Speaker 1 (11:40):
No robots, Yeah, it's like, oh, it's how cute a rowboat?
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (11:44):
Some guys in a rowboat. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
So now everybody, including Philip, is at the mercy of
these pirates. No one knows what's going to happen next.
And as scary as that must have been, the truth
is that at this moment, Philip's entire life is about
to take an unbelievable series of twists and turns that
will turn this teenage fisherman into a legend. This is
the story of Castaway Philip Ashton. All right, So you know,
(12:07):
on those funny like cards from the seventies when there's
like a little tiny island with one palm tree in
a castaway with like the beard in the scraggly pants.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
Yes, and I'm getting comfortable.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Well, this is kind of the vibe of that. This
feels like this guy is the og of that.
Speaker 1 (12:21):
He's the basis or he's the reason for the cartoon. Kin,
He's what the cartoon is based on.
Speaker 2 (12:25):
It's what I kept thinking where I was like, well,
Leads is not just one tiny plot sand pile with
a palm tree, right, but it's not much better. So
the main sources for this story that Maren used are
a memoir written by Philip Ashton himself, which is heavily sighted.
Then there's a twenty fourteen book called At the Point
of a Cutlass by Gregory N. Fleming, and there's an
(12:48):
uncredited article on the New England Historical Society's website. The
rest of the sources are in our show notes. So
we're now on board the Brigantine. Things are looking incredibly
grim for Philip, and that's because this specific vessel called
the Rebecca is helmed by a notoriously violent and sadistic
pirate named Edward ned Low.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
Ned the most terrifying name on the.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
Seas Ned, Ned from human resources, ned or ned the
pirate ned? Oh, no pirate, Ned pirate, dreaded pirate Ned Low. So,
according to a write up by the New England Historical Society,
quote Low had a reputation as a psychopath who mutilated,
disemboweled and decapitated his prisoners.
Speaker 1 (13:31):
Sorry, Ned, Sorry, I take it back.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
You're not a nerd. Mariners who plied the Atlantic were
terrified of Low, who was said to have French fuck.
This is so crazy, okay. Mariners who plied the Atlantic
were terrified of Low, who is said to have fried
a French cook alive. He once cut off a captain's
lips with a cutlass, broiled them and forced the victim
(13:54):
to eat them while still hot.
Speaker 1 (13:57):
Oh that is sadistic person with lips. That was a
very painful fucking thing for me.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
As a person, as a person. Back on the Rebecca,
Ned Lowe is now addressing the dozens of fishermen and
merchants that he's holding hostage, of course, including Philip, and
he offers all of them an ultimatum. They can either
surrender all their possessions and join the Rebecca's crew as pirates,
or they can be held as prisoners. There are no
(14:23):
other options. No third ziase, No, I'm gonna get out
of here. Uh you know what I want to do.
It's crazy at it. I just remembered I have a dinner.
Most of the hostages feel they don't have a choice,
but not Philip Ashton. He refuses to be forced into
becoming a pirate, even as his childhood friend Joseph reluctantly
agrees to. Philip later attributes his decision to his quote
(14:47):
dislike of Nedlowe's company and actions, my concern for my
parents and my fear of being found in such bad company.
So he's all about status.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
He's got morals and status, that's right.
Speaker 2 (14:59):
Yeah, So somewhat naively asks the pirates to put him
quote onboard any other vessel or send him ashore. Okay,
so he actually does ask permission to ski Dattle.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Yeah, no, thank you.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
Of course that doesn't happen. And now Philip is on
Nedlow's radar. So he is the guy that basically goes,
excuse me, can I go? So he's put in heavy chains,
he's beaten, and he's pushed into a cargo hold along
with every other prisoner that's being held on the Rebecca,
and as the days turn to weeks and the weeks
(15:29):
turn two months, Philip begs to be released, but his
pleas are met with more beatings. So it's bad. It's
so bad that when the Rebecca finally anchors, one of
Nedloe's prisoners tries to escape the ship. Occasionally these escapes
are successful, but an unsuccessful escape pretty much means death
for the prisoner, either out in the elements or when
(15:51):
they're recaptured at the hands of the pirates themselves. But
being a prisoner on a pirate ship means being consistently underfed,
regularly tortured, and constantly exposed to illness like what anybody
else could have in the hot, very densely packed holding
area with the other captives, So it's a death sentence
in and of itself. So Philip decides to escape, and
(16:13):
he figures if he dies trying to make a break
for it, at least he tried. But he wants to
be smart about it, so he waits for the right moment,
and in March of seventeen twenty three, which is nine
months after he is first imprisoned, he finally senses an opportunity,
and that comes as the Rebecca is pulling into the
Gulf of Honduras, which at the time is officially under
(16:35):
the control of Spain. You knew that, of course, the
Brigantine anchors near Roatan, which is an island about forty
miles north of Honduras. It's fifty miles long, but only
five miles across at its widest part, so it's a long,
skinny guy. And today this island is known for its
beautiful beaches and the great scuba diving and great snorkeling.
(16:58):
But there is a long history.
Speaker 1 (17:00):
Back then, it wasn't.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
Back then, no snorkeling. People hated this snarkling. Back in
the seventeen hundreds.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
Toros hadnt come yet.
Speaker 2 (17:08):
Yeah, snorkel and to rate, review and subscribe. It's believed
that Rooton was first inhabited by the Pesh indigenous people
who were violently displaced by European colonists in the sixteenth century,
and then by early seventeen twenty three, when the Rebecca
arrives offshore, Roatan is totally uninhabited. Instead, the island and
(17:30):
the islands around it have become hideaways where pirates can
anchor their ships row ashore on smaller boats, look around
for fresh water after long voyages at sea. Yours, ye,
could you feel it? The fresh fresh water?
Speaker 1 (17:44):
Oh, thank God for fresh water.
Speaker 2 (17:45):
Give it up for fresh water. So Nedlow and the
crew of the Rebecca are there to do just that.
Once the ship is anchored, Nedlow unshackles Philip and sends
him with the group that are going to shore to
help fill water casks for the ship. Philip decides this
will be his moment. He explains later, quote, I was
(18:08):
very active in helping get the casks out of the
boat and roll them up to the watering place. End quote.
One of the great quotes.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
That's a must.
Speaker 2 (18:17):
It was my senior quote. Actually, now that I'm thinking
of it, I forgot Philip Ashton is who I quoted
when I graduated. Say, I was very active in helping
get the casks out of the boat and roll them
up to the water.
Speaker 1 (18:29):
It's fucking plaignant.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
It is so mean. As he does this, little by little,
Philip wanders away from the rest of the crew, he
does the classic whistling walking backwards.
Speaker 1 (18:43):
What I hear my.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
Mom calling me, I'll be right back, So he does this,
wanders away, and then suddenly sprints into the jungle and
runs for his life. Yeah, when the pirates realize that
he's gone, they look everywhere for him, but Rotan's forests
are very dense, so trying to find one person in
it feels impossible. So when ned Lowe calls the pirates
(19:08):
back to the Rebecca, they just decide to leave Philip behind.
They figure he's probably gonna die out there. He doesn't
even have shoes on, because you're too Oh my god,
have you been chained up in inside the bottom of
a boat. Don't make people pay for that. Don't just
lifte No, no, no, no, not for free to get
(19:30):
more of audience members. Don't give it for free.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
It's just one. It's like, not even a pair, so
it's not really worth as much.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
So the odds certainly are stacked against Philip at this moment.
He has no fire starting tools, he has no hunting
equipment of any kind, and he's already starving, so he's
a mess. He's able to find limes and coconuts right away,
but of course the limes are bitter and he can't
open the coconuts. Sure, so it's isn't that life? Luckily,
(19:58):
Philip also finds wild fi and something called suppote. I
know right in my salad. Yeah, I'm just kinda put
it together and then just hold the coconut in your hand.
Philip describes suppote as quote larger than an orange, of
oval shape, of a brownish collar outside and red within.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
Great fruit? What A just what it is?
Speaker 2 (20:21):
No, because I wouldn't be able to tell you anyway,
but I was thinking mango.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
Oh okay, yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
To make sure these fruits are safe to eat, Philip
decides he's going to wait around until one of the
native animal goes and eats it first, and then study
the reaction it had. You know, their reactions to the fruit.
But the idea of waiting feels next to him possible
because he's already starving. So this desperation leads to a
few close calls, like in one case, Philip finds a
(20:48):
piece of fruit. It looks like an apple to him.
He looks it over. He has no idea what it is,
but he is almost about to eat it, and then
he just decides it's not worth the risk, and he
will later learn it's an extremely toxic fruit called the manchioneal,
which is also known as the death Apple's right there
in the name, right there in his hand.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
I wonder there's there's like some kind of smell that
it's like, you know, cave mambran.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
Yes, it's like no, no, no, he writes later quote
if I had eaten it, it would have been the
death to me. So as days turn to weeks, Philip
manages to find enough fruit for himself to stay alive.
He also finds fresh water very easily him and those
casks it's his specialty. Soon he builds himself a hut
(21:34):
out of palm fronds and tree branches, classic castaway stuff.
But of course it's all exhausting for him. He's constantly
exerting himself and burning tons of energy during those trecks,
like hunting for supplies and looking for fruit, And although
he's grateful for any sustenance, it's like way more than
he got on that boat. He's struggling to meaningfully refuel.
(21:56):
He needs protein and there isn't any, although it's there.
He crosses paths with countless wild hogs, ducks, pigeons and
deer on the island.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
Oh man, what are the chances?
Speaker 2 (22:11):
He just sent his check to Peta, and there's just
no way he's going to do that something with the soul. No,
he just doesn't have the tools. He would love to
kill any of those animals with joy. One day, as
he walks along the beach, he stumbles upon some tortoise
nests with dozens of small eggs inside. He eats several
of these eggs raw, and will later describe the taste
(22:32):
as quote, not very good. Man, could you do it?
Could you do it?
Speaker 1 (22:37):
Crack an egg? Yes, absolute tortoise egg? How big are those?
Speaker 2 (22:41):
Small? The paper that Maren wrote for me says small,
not very good. I could never you would?
Speaker 1 (22:49):
You could? You could?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
I could after a couple months. Yeah, but fuck yeah,
let's not get into sitution.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
I got a cocktail that has rag in it, but
it tastes like like cocktail with rawag in it. No,
it's not bad, it's not bad.
Speaker 2 (23:02):
Was there any kind of a tortoise essence at all?
Speaker 1 (23:05):
No? Okay, not great?
Speaker 2 (23:06):
Then you weren't on row a ten Island.
Speaker 1 (23:09):
I wasn't starving for a cocktail? Or was it was?
Or was you?
Speaker 2 (23:17):
So months pass and Philip doesn't have a game plan
for anything other than just surviving, and despite this island
being relatively small, every one of Philip's days is filled
with new and terrifying experiences, like when he came upon
a snake that he describes as quote very large, as big,
(23:37):
round as a man's waist, and twelve or fourteen feet long,
and he says, quote the first I saw of these
greatly surprised me, for I was very near to it
when I discovered it to be a living creature. And
then it opened its mouth wide enough to have thrown
a hat into it, and blew out its breath at me.
Speaker 1 (23:58):
Oh, I didn't know that snake did that? I mean,
take a deep sigh like.
Speaker 2 (24:03):
A giant hissing python. Yeah. One positive for Philip is
that he uses his downtime on Roatan while he's not
foraging or building shelter, to improve his swimming skills. But
of course that's also filled with danger, and he later
writes quote another time, as I was swimming, a shark
struck me in the thigh just as I set my
foot to ground, so grounded himself on the shoals and
(24:26):
could not turn himself to come at me with his mouth.
Through the goodness of God, I escaped, falling prey to
his devouring teeth. So a big shark beached itself to
try to eat him and just missed. Essentially. As the
days and weeks go by, Philip becomes increasingly frail, both
physically and of course mentally. His days become monotonous and
(24:49):
they start to blend together. Ben there, Philip wanders up
the same hills, ventures to the same fruit trees, stares
at the same expanse of ocean over and over, day
after day. He starved for human connection, and he hasn't
talked to another human being in months, and complains quote
that parrots here had not even been taught to speak.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
That's his complaint, two stars, that's his The alborithew of
the island.
Speaker 2 (25:15):
Come with me as I explore this island. Then something
unbelievable happens. In November of seventeen twenty three, after being
stranded for around nine months, he suddenly spots a man
rowing toward the island in a canoe. Wow, hey, what
Philip can hardly believe his eyes, and for a second
he thinks he's hallucinating, But when the man comes ashore,
(25:37):
Philip realizes that he is actually real. So he cautiously
approaches this man, who is visibly frightened by Philip and
his crazy, unkempt appearance. So I think nine months at
this point, scraggly beardy, As writer Gregory and Fleming notes, quote,
he stepped back a little, letting the sight of Philip
(25:57):
sink in, and then finally approached and shook his hand. So,
as it turned out, this man is from England, and
he tells Philip he's recently escaped Spaniards on mainland Honduras
who were trying to kill him. The englishman claims he
came to Roatan because he believed it was abandoned. He
doesn't share much more information about himself. He doesn't even
say what his name is, but Philip doesn't care, because
(26:20):
this Englishman came prepared. Philip later writes that the man
brought quote five pounds of pork, a knife, powder, tobacco,
tongs and flint.
Speaker 1 (26:30):
What kind of powder are we talking about, dude, dude,
the old nosecandy little ski party on Roatan, and this
man is thank God kind enough to share all of
these supplies with Philip. I don't think I would like
I was hallucinating that that's lucky.
Speaker 2 (26:46):
It's a dream. After nine months, it's like the dream.
But as grateful as Philip is to have met the stranger,
their time together does not last long. After a few days,
the Englishman says he wants to go to a neighboring
island to scavenge, and but Philip doesn't think that he
is physically up for that task, so he decides to
stay behind, which to me, I'm trying to read between
(27:07):
the lines of like, immediately, did you hate each other?
Speaker 1 (27:09):
Yeah, the shit out of each other.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
It's like a guy from Boston and a British guy.
Speaker 1 (27:15):
I'm just gonna go.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
I feel like I want to just check that other island.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Totally stay here. If you're not up for.
Speaker 2 (27:20):
It, chill, chill underneath this palm tree. You got this.
Speaker 1 (27:24):
Here's some powder. I'll be back.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
Philip's like, cool, cool, cool, I'll watch the powder. So,
as the Englishman climbs into his canoe, he assures Philip
that he will be back soon. I'm just going to
check out this other party and then I'll come back
and we'll totally keep stop.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
Just for this party, and then I'm gonna come back here.
I don't even want to go yeah, but I have
to go to show my face on the siland I
need the credit.
Speaker 2 (27:49):
An hour after the Englishman leaves Roatan, there's severe weather
with quote violent gusts of wind and rain. That Englishman
never returns, So several days past, Philip accepts the fact
that the Englishman is likely never coming back, and he
starts using the supplies the man left behind. He's like,
you mean, three minutes after he left, he's now able
(28:10):
to cut up tortoise meat, crabs, and coconuts, and he
can cook all of it over a fire. He can,
finally say, she himself, and it's all an absolute godsend
for Philip, and he credits the mysterious Englishman for saving
his life. So now it's January of seventeen twenty four.
Philip has been stuck on Roatan for nearly eleven months.
(28:32):
One day, while he's out scavenging, he notices a small
boat that's on the shore. At first, Philip thinks it
could be that englishman's canoe. As he gets closer, he
realizes he's never seen this boat before. It looks more
well designed, and it has a small mast and a sail.
So somehow the boat has washed up ashore without a captain,
(28:53):
so Philip decides to take it for himself. And after
just an empty boat, an empty boat just shows up.
Speaker 1 (28:59):
This guy it's the lucky. I mean, look, he's not lucky,
but keeps getting lucky.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
I mean there's islands that are out there that are
just like all spiders that leterally. You can't go to
them because they're covered in poisonous spiders.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
Yeah, that's real. And he got the one where just
a random really cool English guy with tons of coke
showed up and an.
Speaker 2 (29:21):
Empty fucking boat and like coconuts and limes, like everything
that you need for my tie except for run. Yeah,
and now there's just like, oh, a boat got here.
He's in the perfect jet stream. After a few practice runs,
Philip feels comfortable enough to sail toward nearby islands, hoping
to find someone friendly, not a pirate, who can help
(29:43):
him get back to Massachusetts. So he packs some food
he takes off on a twenty mile sailing journey to
the neighboring island of Guanaja. He doesn't have any maps
or anything. He just has to blindly go out into
the ocean. As he approaches this new island, he sees
a ship in the distance, anchored in this island's bay,
so he's very excited at the possibility of seeing another person,
(30:06):
possibly someone who might be able to help him. But
he also knows this area as a hideaway for pirates,
so chances are it could be a pirate. Philip will
later write quote, I could never entertain the thoughts of
returning on board a pirate ship if I should have
the opportunity, I would rather live and die as I was.
Until he knows who is on that ship, Philip decides
to lay low. He anchors his boat on the other
(30:29):
side of the island and then spends two days cautiously
crossing the island, still barefoot, no sneaky think. One stick snaps.
He freezes for two days, keeps going. When he finally
makes it back over to the bay to do some spying,
the ship is gone. He took too long. Now he's
defeated and exhausted, so Philip slumps down against a tree,
(30:53):
and while still sitting up, he falls asleep, very castaways.
It's unclear how long he dozes off, but the next
thing he remembers is the sound of gunfire close.
Speaker 1 (31:02):
Up twenty five years sleeps.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
When he jumps up, he looks around and sees several
small boats approaching the shore. Philip will later say quote,
I soon turned about and ran as fast as my
sore feet would let me into the bushes. So Philip
will later learn that these men are Spaniards. They likely
think Philip is some sort of political enemy, a pirate,
or a laborer in the illegal lumber trade, which is
(31:29):
now a booming industry in South America. So Philip is
once again running from men who want to capture him.
He manages to hide until the Spaniards leave. When Philip
walks back down to the beach, he sees bullet holes
in the tree where he'd been resting, and they'd only
missed him by inches, So again lucky unlucky. Now Philip
(31:50):
has to hike all the way back to his small
boat because he had to be so sneaky, it takes
him three days to get there. The mosquitoes and the
flies on Guanaha are even worse than they were on Rowatan.
He's being bitten constantly, and he's now running on very
little food and water. He finally gets to hop into
his boat and sail back to Roatan and he gets
(32:10):
there after nightfall, so he goes back to the island.
He has to go back to where he started, so irritating.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:17):
More time passes, and when March seventeen twenty four comes
and goes, he's now been on Roatan for a full year.
His mental and physical health are very fragile. He's rail thin,
he's covered in insect bites, his clothes are torn to shreds.
By June of seventeen twenty four, Philip's benmroon for fifteen months,
(32:37):
and he is so weak that he struggles to make
his once very routine trips across the island for fruit
and water. He now spends much of his time staring
out at the ocean like batsidne. Usually doing this is
pretty uneventful until one day when he sees two small
dots in the water. As they move closer to shore,
Philip sees it's a pair of men in two small canoes.
(33:01):
One of them shouts out in English, who's there. Philip
breathes a little sigh of relief. He yells back that
he's from the Colonies and he's been stuck on this
island for over a year. The men announce that they're
British loggers. They explain that Spaniards are clamping down on
their operations, which are illegal, and that Spaniards are planning
a raid on the logging camp. So these men are
(33:21):
now scouting new potential campsites. So after some back and forth,
the men establish trust with one another, and the duo
and the canoes come ashore. According to Philip, when one
of the men approaches him quote, he started back, frightened
to see such a poor, ragged, lean wand forlorn, wild,
miserable object so near to him. So luckily these men
(33:45):
show Philip kindness. They notice that he is unable to
walk very well at all, so the British loggers decide
to carry him back to their boats. Then they take
him to their logging camp on the neighboring island, and
along the way the men excitedly listen to Philip's outrageous
story of survival, and they offer him some rum which
right he finally has the missing piece, but now the
(34:08):
coconuts and the limes are back on the island.
Speaker 1 (34:10):
Turn around, damn it.
Speaker 2 (34:13):
The RUMs is a bit too strong for Philip, who
gets very very drunk, very quickly.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
It's not an empty stomach, starving for fifteen months. Snack girl.
Speaker 2 (34:22):
No, first you order an awesome blossom, then you get
some piso and chick.
Speaker 1 (34:27):
No, you need a fucking face space out coding.
Speaker 2 (34:32):
Please, So he says about himself drinking this rum quote,
this small quantity, through my long disuse of any liquor
higher spirited than water, and my present weakness through my
animal spirits into such a violent agitation. So you got
shit faced, immediately, shit faced and an asshole drunk.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
Oh no, right on.
Speaker 2 (34:53):
A canoe, get out of here now. At the camp,
Philip is finally surrounded by other people. And this group
consists of eighteen male loggers and a female cook. Ma'am,
are you okay? And they all do their best to
take care of Philip. He's given new clothes, a much
needed bare of shoes, deer meat and pork, and the
(35:15):
time to recover and gain strength. After several weeks, Philip
is well enough to help the loggers build a new
camp back on Roatan. So he's back. Yes, he's back
home or belongs man. Then, in August of seventeen twenty four,
a ship called the Diamond stops near this logging camp.
The Diamond wasn't supposed to pass through the area, but
(35:37):
storms pushed its journey south. So now the ship's crew
is in desperate need of fresh water. They got it
on Rowtan. Turns out this vessel is from Massachusetts, just
like Philip. Even more bizarrely, the Diamond Sets sailed just
a few miles from Philip's coastal hometown. But the most
fateful twist in this wild story is that Philip knows
(35:59):
the Diamonds captain their acquaintances from back home. Shit, They're like,
didn't you work a seven eleve?
Speaker 1 (36:05):
Hey, this is seven and all I used to go
to every morning, ye old seven eleven ye old.
Speaker 2 (36:12):
No slurpees, just grog. So that captain, who Philip simply
refers to as Captain Dove, immediately and enthusiastically agrees to
take Philip home, and with that, his long journey finally
ends in May of seventeen twenty five, when he arrives
at Salem Harbor on the Diamond. This is nearly three
(36:32):
full years after he was first taken prisoner by ned Low.
Speaker 1 (36:36):
Three full years real shitty years.
Speaker 2 (36:39):
Yeah, Philip says, quote, I went the same evening to
my father's house where I was received as one coming
to them from the dead. I bet knock, knock knock. Yeah,
can you imagine?
Speaker 1 (36:50):
Oh my god?
Speaker 2 (36:51):
And they're like, what's this beard? Look, it's no take
off those kulottes. They don't look good on you. As
Philip readjusts to his old he must come to terms
with all that's happened to him. He knows very well
that he cheated death countless times. I mean, the idea
that that ship just got blown off course it's the
only reason they were there, Yeah, is crazy, all of it. Tragically,
(37:13):
Philip learns that his dear childhood friend Joseph Libby, who
saved his life, wasn't so lucky. According to the New
England Historical Society quote, while Philip lingered a castaway on
a Caribbean island, Libby met his death by hanging in
Rhode Island with twenty five other pirates.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
Who oh so because he said yes to being a pirate. Yeah,
even though a pirate.
Speaker 2 (37:35):
Yeah, it was like to try to stay alive and
stay alive in an okay way.
Speaker 1 (37:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:40):
And they don't care, No, they don't care about that.
It's trader behavior. Right before long, Philip is encouraged to
write his story, and his memoirs published in seventeen twenty five,
soon after he returns to Massachusetts. It's very short, and
it's very much written in the vernacular of the day,
so it is a bit of a danse read. This
(38:01):
is Maren's Maren's like commentary.
Speaker 1 (38:04):
On I tried Karen Look.
Speaker 2 (38:07):
But you can find it if you want to read
it online under a couple of different titles. One is
Stranded in Rowtan, The True Account of Escape from Pirates.
After this Mamour is published, some people wonder if Philip
made the whole thing up.
Speaker 1 (38:21):
Can you imagine going through that and then being like.
Speaker 2 (38:24):
Liar, It's like, sorry, so you said you immediately found coconuts, right.
And one of the reasons people think it's made up
is because the book Robinson Crusoe had just come out
and was super popular, So people are just like, oh,
you just showed up and basically told the same story, right,
and to make money. But as unbelievable as it all sounds,
no one has ever been able to disprove Philip's story,
(38:45):
and many parts of it have been corroborated.
Speaker 1 (38:47):
About all the other the other sailors.
Speaker 2 (38:50):
Yeah, I mean, nameless English guy doesn't help anything. Why
didn't you insist upon I thought there would be a
reveal later.
Speaker 1 (38:57):
Yeah, take a photo of his driver's license, be.
Speaker 2 (39:00):
Like, look, it's Jack the Ripper.
Speaker 1 (39:04):
That's what he did, silent.
Speaker 2 (39:05):
He didn't want to give his name. We don't know
much about Philip past this chapter in his life, but
by most accounts, his memoir and his momentary fame don't
fundamentally change his life. He goes right back to his
work as a fisherman. He gets married, he has some kids,
and the rest of his life is pretty hazy. We
do know that he dies in seventeen forty six, in
(39:26):
his early forties. So to this day, Philip Ashton's unlikely
survival story is widely accepted to actually happened, although even
Philip himself seems to be in disbelief over everything that
he went through, writing in his memoir the quote, I
cannot take notice of the strange concurrence of divine providence
all along, in saving from the rage of the pirates
(39:47):
and the malice of the Spaniards, from the beasts of
the field and the monsters of the sea, in keeping
me alive amid so many deaths in such a lonely
and helpless condition, and in bringing about my deliverance. And
that's the story of Castaway Philip Ashton.
Speaker 1 (40:03):
Oh my god, the luckiest man in seventeen twenty four.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
Yeah wow, aside from ned Low, the super pirate who
just got to kill and cut off lips.
Speaker 1 (40:13):
Yeah, he's just like thinking of the worst possible way
to torture someone here.
Speaker 2 (40:20):
Cut off your lips, fry him up, yeah, and you
eat him.
Speaker 1 (40:22):
Make fun of my name again, yeah, make fun of
net Ned.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
You don't like the name net that's pussy Okay.
Speaker 1 (40:27):
Oh okay, Wow, great job. Great solo story.
Speaker 2 (40:30):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (40:31):
That was fun.
Speaker 2 (40:31):
See solo story. It was fun. It's a fun jaunt,
which is what we need sometime venture totally these days.
Speaker 1 (40:40):
Chop, thank you. Well we did it. You did it,
I did it. I didn't do much.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
You did what you're supposed to do. Show my feet,
get those tootsies up there and make us some money.
Speaker 1 (40:52):
Let's get on the only fans.
Speaker 2 (40:58):
You mean feet pit.
Speaker 1 (41:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (41:01):
Yeah, well, good job. Thanks everybody.
Speaker 1 (41:03):
Thanks for listening.
Speaker 2 (41:04):
You guys, yeah, thanks for being here. Thanks for being
so understanding about the fact that we were trying to
do many things at one time.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
That's right, and you know, be women of the world.
Speaker 2 (41:13):
Yeah, that's right. You love it when we do that.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
That's your favorite part of this podcast.
Speaker 2 (41:17):
It really is say sexy and don't get murdered.
Speaker 1 (41:20):
Goodbye, Elvis, Do you want a cookie?
Speaker 2 (41:30):
This has been an Exactly Right production.
Speaker 1 (41:31):
Our senior producers are Alejandra Keck and Molly Smith.
Speaker 2 (41:34):
Our editor is Aristotle os Veto.
Speaker 1 (41:36):
This episode was mixed by Leona Squalacci.
Speaker 2 (41:38):
Our researchers are Maaron McGlashan and Ali Elkin.
Speaker 1 (41:41):
Email your hometowns to My Favorite Murder at gmail dot com.
Speaker 2 (41:44):
Follow the show on Instagram at my Favorite Murder.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
Listen to My Favorite Murder on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
Speaker 2 (41:52):
And now you can watch us on Exactly Right's YouTube page.
While you're there, please like and subscribe.
Speaker 1 (41:57):
Goodbybye.
Hello, and welcome my Favorite Murder.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
That's Georgia Hartstar, that's Karen Kilgarriff, and we're here to
do a little bit of podcasting for you, just.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
A little like a side of podcasting.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
One of those small ramikins, cute breadcrumbs on the top.
Torch it burn it a little and that's really all
you need.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
Crunchy and cheesy podcasting.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Don't forget your podcast stomach is only this bit.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
Are you hungry?
Speaker 2 (00:42):
I don't know who knows anymore?
Speaker 1 (00:44):
I mean truly. I mean, so we're doing some solo episodes.
I feel like we should just talk about it, like
we're planning this huge tour. We have our researchers, they
have a lot of work, and so we're just gonna
kind of do some solos so we can catch up
on all of that.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
Reminder, these are free.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
It's summer. These are free. We are human beings with lives,
trying to live lives at least a little bit, and
going on tour for you, fucking going on tour. Yeah,
go to my Favorite Murder dot com slash live and
get your tickets if you want them.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
This is there a couple left. There's a couple other.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
Speaking of I think we should also say, like there
are no plans for tours in the future. You guys
like this is I don't see myself touring again after this.
So if you're on the fence about.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
It, I thought you said you were going to be
a stand up good luck.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
I mean no, thank you. Yeah, get your tickets.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Yeah, that's a threat direct, it's kind of a threat.
It's an absolute threat.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
It's a warning. It's just information that I feel like
we should give people.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Absolutely, here's more information we should give people. One of
the biggest we can call it fights that you've ever
seen on this Podcasndle a scandal. It's a scandal. I
think it's something that you didn't realize. It's going to
say something very political, but instead I'll say this this Thanksgiving,
we promise you there's something new to fight about. And
it is who is right in the sister's wedding argument,
(02:05):
Big sister or little sister and the people have spoken.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Yeah, So Minniesode four forty four, you and I discussed
an email that came in about wedding drama because we'd
asked for wedding drama and this little sister wrote in
about how high maintenance her big sister was being because
the little sister was going to have her wedding two
months after the big sister's wedding. And I thought that
(02:29):
that was fine, you understood the big sister side. And
so we took a poll.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
Yeah, right, a poll that almost twelve thousand people responded to. Like,
when I first heard these poll results, I'm like, what
is that three hundred people? There's no roy, There's no
way I'm wrong to that level.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
Yeah, you're right, I see eleven K, eleven point nine K.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Eleven point nine thousand people were like, I have an opinion.
And so the results are in this poll, after twelve
thousand people basically responded, seventy nine percent were in favor
of the little sister and only twenty one percent we're
on the big sister side.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
That's a big margin.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
It's a big margin.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
And so that is for the people who say, stick
to true crime. Why do you fucking talk in the
beginning of the that's for you. Eleven point nine Why
I angry today?
Speaker 2 (03:15):
I love it. Get it out. Let everybody know. But
here's the thing. If we could stick to true crime,
we would have done it nine and a half years ago.
We're not. The argument's over, just like this argument is over.
The people have voted on the Little Sister Georgia's side.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
So we posted a clip of the debate to Instagram
and TikTok, and we also got a lot of comments,
which is of course what we actually want, what we're
looking for. Yeah, so someone says it's a little sister.
This is classic bratty little siss behavior. That's from TikTok
from I can make another username, it's their user name.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
Oh yeah, well, a very good point that and dot
m dot z makes on Instagram, which is the military
is no joke when it comes to leave little Sister
all the way. So very good point.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
What Molly did, which was really smart as gave me
your side arguments and you my side arguments.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Yes, we simply must understand what the other side was
talking about.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Here's a long one. This is from Instagram from Test Jagger. Wells,
I'm going with both in the wrong. The younger sister
pissed me off with the way she worded the whole thing.
You don't get to unilaterally decide that this will be
fun for you and your sister. And I didn't like
the way she talked about her sister's relationship, like that
wedding matters less because they've been together and engaged for
(04:29):
a while.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Yeah, okay, fair, there's a lot of that kind of stuff,
but kind of similarly ashton underscore with underscore and underscore
e So ashton Ian said, how is this the most
divisive content you've ever posted? I cannot decide. I'm an
older sister, but dot dot dot can we get both perspectives?
Speaker 1 (04:52):
Lol? Oh my god? Huh? Bethany and TikTok said six
months apart is the correct answer.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
I love that one. It okay, just like we've saw
Mitch m I c h dot Some said, these sisters
can afford weddings in this economy. Very good point.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
This phrase my blood pressure. I read every comment and
I still can't decide.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
Someone knows shit. Shelby said, is there a secret third
sister we can side? I bet there is.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
I bet there is. And she's like, I'm staying fucking
out of this little sister taking both sides, taking either side.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
Yeah, she basically hates both them equally and thinks they're
both wrong equally.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
Yeah, so what do you think? Let us know?
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I mean This was a fun. If you didn't hear
about it, you can go watch the clip because you
will have a very definitive opinion.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Definitely, just definitive and definite.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Looking for those big sisters arguers you want to come
and show up, Only the little sister showed up, which
is very little sisters.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
They're all on social media. The little sisters are the
social media ones they do have. But my ones are
on Facebook. The little ones are on TikTok and Instagram. Right,
fite me argue with me about that.
Speaker 2 (05:56):
Okay, I can't figure out how to log onto Instagram.
That's like me with my Is it a Finsta? I
had a Finsta and I couldn't remember what fake a
name I used, right, and I just never used it again.
I think I ha'd some Kevin something I tried to go.
It's so random, so fake. Yeah, no one would ever suspect.
And it's like they don't because I can't log on Classic. So,
(06:20):
because this was such a popular interaction both here on
the show and then of course content wise on other platforms,
we decided we should have a more pick aside where
George and I argue for or against whatever is going on. So,
if you have something going on in your family, especially
right now between you and your sister especially or friend
(06:41):
of course or whoever. Yeah, just something you can't settle,
Please don't make it. Don't bring us into any kind
of a legal area, and.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
Don't plase your decision on what we say either. This
is not legally binding.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Whatever we say, that's right, Our advice is not a
professional or reasonable.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
We're barely doctors.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
We just passed those that last bar exam. So we
want to help you, and we mostly want to argue,
and we probably won't and we won't help you. We'll
help ourselves arg you to you been great? All right?
We have a podcast network. You want to talk about it.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Sure, We are so excited and proud you've heard us
talk about it. We are so proud to welcome our
newest podcast. It's about cults. It's called Trust Me to
the Exactly Right Family. On their premiere episode, Lola and
Megan sit down with artist and writer Aqina Cox, who
shares her experience growing up in the Unification Church, also
(07:37):
known as the Moonies, from mass weddings to unpaid labor
and Reverend Moon surprising ties to American politics. This is
the first part of an incredible two part series. New
episodes of Trust Me are every Wednesday. Please rate, review, subscribe.
Speaker 2 (07:52):
Then over on Bananas, We've got Curtain, Scottie talking about
a Florida man who celebrated his birthday by doing meth,
stealing a tour train and then going ahead and picking
up some passengers to give that tour.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
It's nice of him, that's community service.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
And then over on Ghost and Ross's Gag to welcome
back filmmaker, writer and drag queen icon Peaches Christ legend legend,
but to talk about stigmata, a mysterious piece of Jesus
toast and new discoveries surrounding the unsolved death of legendary
drag queen Heckleina.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
In case you missed it, We're going on tour you
may have missed. At the beginning of this, I be
guilty of you into buying tickets. Some shows are sold out.
Lots of shows actually are sold out, more than half. Yeah,
So if you want to come see us live, go
grab your tickets at my favorite murder dot com slash Live.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
All right, so this is your solo episode.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
That's right. So with solo episodes, we pick stories that
are fun. I would say, Okay, I like fun.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
Mine for the next episode is not fun.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
Yeah, we picked differently. Yeah, but this one especially is
very very thematically off target in a way, but very interesting.
And we've done these kinds of stories before. This one
starts June fifteenth, seventeen twenty two.
Speaker 1 (09:12):
Oh Wow, oh way back machine.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
And it starts off the south western coast of modern
day Nova Scotia at a settlement called Port Roseway. There's
a group of six fishermen from New England. Their ship,
the Milton, is anchored at that port after a long
day's work. Among those six men is a nineteen year
old from Massachusetts named Philip Ashton. Philip is exhausted, as
(09:37):
is the rest of the Milton's crew, because it's a
grueling job, of course, beyond the usual difficulties of these
labor intensive fishing expeditions. Philip, who is a weak swimmer,
fell overboard a few days prior, and his shipmate and
childhood friend, Joseph Libby actually pulled him out of the water,
thank god, because Philip would have drowned otherwise. So Philip
(10:00):
and Joseph and the rest of the crew are ready
for some r and R before they have to continue
on that journey. But there are thirteen other vessels anchoring
near Port Roseway at the moment, everybody's ready for some
r and R. But then the Milton crew sees a
fourteenth vessel entering this port. It's a large ship with
two masts. That's called the Brigantine.
Speaker 1 (10:22):
You knew I must.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
So Philip and his shipmates watch this bigger Brigantine boat
drop a smaller boat, and now that boat is rowing
straight for the Milton. So Philip and the rest of
the crew don't really think much of it because they
figure that the crew on the Brigantine just want to
see other human faces after a long time at sea.
(10:45):
Maybe hear the latest news from the American colonies, you know, get.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
The updates, the little gossip.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
Wouldn't that be nice after like three years at sea
and you're.
Speaker 1 (10:53):
Just like, oh my god, I'm sick of these fucking people.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
Get me away from these nerds. So it turns out
that's not the case at all. They're not just a
boat full of gossips. These strangers board the Milton brandishing
pistols and cutlasses, and after the initial shock wears off,
Philip and the rest of the crew realize that they're
dealing with every eighteenth centuries see Traveler's Worst Nightmare pirates.
(11:19):
These pirates easily overpower the six man Milton crew and
force them to board their brigantine. And once that's done,
they bored every other vessel anchored in Port Roseway and
they take all those crews hostage as well.
Speaker 1 (11:32):
Nobody there's thirteen other boats, and nobody fought back, no.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Because they're all doing that same thing of like, oh,
look at these guys in a rowboat. I think rowboats
aren't that scary?
Speaker 1 (11:40):
No robots, Yeah, it's like, oh, it's how cute a rowboat?
Speaker 2 (11:43):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (11:44):
Some guys in a rowboat. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
So now everybody, including Philip, is at the mercy of
these pirates. No one knows what's going to happen next.
And as scary as that must have been, the truth
is that at this moment, Philip's entire life is about
to take an unbelievable series of twists and turns that
will turn this teenage fisherman into a legend. This is
the story of Castaway Philip Ashton. All right, So you know,
(12:07):
on those funny like cards from the seventies when there's
like a little tiny island with one palm tree in
a castaway with like the beard in the scraggly pants.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
Yes, and I'm getting comfortable.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Well, this is kind of the vibe of that. This
feels like this guy is the og of that.
Speaker 1 (12:21):
He's the basis or he's the reason for the cartoon. Kin,
He's what the cartoon is based on.
Speaker 2 (12:25):
It's what I kept thinking where I was like, well,
Leads is not just one tiny plot sand pile with
a palm tree, right, but it's not much better. So
the main sources for this story that Maren used are
a memoir written by Philip Ashton himself, which is heavily sighted.
Then there's a twenty fourteen book called At the Point
of a Cutlass by Gregory N. Fleming, and there's an
(12:48):
uncredited article on the New England Historical Society's website. The
rest of the sources are in our show notes. So
we're now on board the Brigantine. Things are looking incredibly
grim for Philip, and that's because this specific vessel called
the Rebecca is helmed by a notoriously violent and sadistic
pirate named Edward ned Low.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
Ned the most terrifying name on the.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
Seas Ned, Ned from human resources, ned or ned the
pirate ned? Oh, no pirate, Ned pirate, dreaded pirate Ned Low. So,
according to a write up by the New England Historical Society,
quote Low had a reputation as a psychopath who mutilated,
disemboweled and decapitated his prisoners.
Speaker 1 (13:31):
Sorry, Ned, Sorry, I take it back.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
You're not a nerd. Mariners who plied the Atlantic were
terrified of Low, who was said to have French fuck.
This is so crazy, okay. Mariners who plied the Atlantic
were terrified of Low, who is said to have fried
a French cook alive. He once cut off a captain's
lips with a cutlass, broiled them and forced the victim
(13:54):
to eat them while still hot.
Speaker 1 (13:57):
Oh that is sadistic person with lips. That was a
very painful fucking thing for me.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
As a person, as a person. Back on the Rebecca,
Ned Lowe is now addressing the dozens of fishermen and
merchants that he's holding hostage, of course, including Philip, and
he offers all of them an ultimatum. They can either
surrender all their possessions and join the Rebecca's crew as pirates,
or they can be held as prisoners. There are no
(14:23):
other options. No third ziase, No, I'm gonna get out
of here. Uh you know what I want to do.
It's crazy at it. I just remembered I have a dinner.
Most of the hostages feel they don't have a choice,
but not Philip Ashton. He refuses to be forced into
becoming a pirate, even as his childhood friend Joseph reluctantly
agrees to. Philip later attributes his decision to his quote
(14:47):
dislike of Nedlowe's company and actions, my concern for my
parents and my fear of being found in such bad company.
So he's all about status.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
He's got morals and status, that's right.
Speaker 2 (14:59):
Yeah, So somewhat naively asks the pirates to put him
quote onboard any other vessel or send him ashore. Okay,
so he actually does ask permission to ski Dattle.
Speaker 1 (15:08):
Yeah, no, thank you.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
Of course that doesn't happen. And now Philip is on
Nedlow's radar. So he is the guy that basically goes,
excuse me, can I go? So he's put in heavy chains,
he's beaten, and he's pushed into a cargo hold along
with every other prisoner that's being held on the Rebecca,
and as the days turn to weeks and the weeks
(15:29):
turn two months, Philip begs to be released, but his
pleas are met with more beatings. So it's bad. It's
so bad that when the Rebecca finally anchors, one of
Nedloe's prisoners tries to escape the ship. Occasionally these escapes
are successful, but an unsuccessful escape pretty much means death
for the prisoner, either out in the elements or when
(15:51):
they're recaptured at the hands of the pirates themselves. But
being a prisoner on a pirate ship means being consistently underfed,
regularly tortured, and constantly exposed to illness like what anybody
else could have in the hot, very densely packed holding
area with the other captives, So it's a death sentence
in and of itself. So Philip decides to escape, and
(16:13):
he figures if he dies trying to make a break
for it, at least he tried. But he wants to
be smart about it, so he waits for the right moment,
and in March of seventeen twenty three, which is nine
months after he is first imprisoned, he finally senses an opportunity,
and that comes as the Rebecca is pulling into the
Gulf of Honduras, which at the time is officially under
(16:35):
the control of Spain. You knew that, of course, the
Brigantine anchors near Roatan, which is an island about forty
miles north of Honduras. It's fifty miles long, but only
five miles across at its widest part, so it's a long,
skinny guy. And today this island is known for its
beautiful beaches and the great scuba diving and great snorkeling.
(16:58):
But there is a long history.
Speaker 1 (17:00):
Back then, it wasn't.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
Back then, no snorkeling. People hated this snarkling. Back in
the seventeen hundreds.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
Toros hadnt come yet.
Speaker 2 (17:08):
Yeah, snorkel and to rate, review and subscribe. It's believed
that Rooton was first inhabited by the Pesh indigenous people
who were violently displaced by European colonists in the sixteenth century,
and then by early seventeen twenty three, when the Rebecca
arrives offshore, Roatan is totally uninhabited. Instead, the island and
(17:30):
the islands around it have become hideaways where pirates can
anchor their ships row ashore on smaller boats, look around
for fresh water after long voyages at sea. Yours, ye,
could you feel it? The fresh fresh water?
Speaker 1 (17:44):
Oh, thank God for fresh water.
Speaker 2 (17:45):
Give it up for fresh water. So Nedlow and the
crew of the Rebecca are there to do just that.
Once the ship is anchored, Nedlow unshackles Philip and sends
him with the group that are going to shore to
help fill water casks for the ship. Philip decides this
will be his moment. He explains later, quote, I was
(18:08):
very active in helping get the casks out of the
boat and roll them up to the watering place. End quote.
One of the great quotes.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
That's a must.
Speaker 2 (18:17):
It was my senior quote. Actually, now that I'm thinking
of it, I forgot Philip Ashton is who I quoted
when I graduated. Say, I was very active in helping
get the casks out of the boat and roll them
up to the water.
Speaker 1 (18:29):
It's fucking plaignant.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
It is so mean. As he does this, little by little,
Philip wanders away from the rest of the crew, he
does the classic whistling walking backwards.
Speaker 1 (18:43):
What I hear my.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
Mom calling me, I'll be right back, So he does this,
wanders away, and then suddenly sprints into the jungle and
runs for his life. Yeah, when the pirates realize that
he's gone, they look everywhere for him, but Rotan's forests
are very dense, so trying to find one person in
it feels impossible. So when ned Lowe calls the pirates
(19:08):
back to the Rebecca, they just decide to leave Philip behind.
They figure he's probably gonna die out there. He doesn't
even have shoes on, because you're too Oh my god,
have you been chained up in inside the bottom of
a boat. Don't make people pay for that. Don't just
lifte No, no, no, no, not for free to get
(19:30):
more of audience members. Don't give it for free.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
It's just one. It's like, not even a pair, so
it's not really worth as much.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
So the odds certainly are stacked against Philip at this moment.
He has no fire starting tools, he has no hunting
equipment of any kind, and he's already starving, so he's
a mess. He's able to find limes and coconuts right away,
but of course the limes are bitter and he can't
open the coconuts. Sure, so it's isn't that life? Luckily,
(19:58):
Philip also finds wild fi and something called suppote. I
know right in my salad. Yeah, I'm just kinda put
it together and then just hold the coconut in your hand.
Philip describes suppote as quote larger than an orange, of
oval shape, of a brownish collar outside and red within.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
Great fruit? What A just what it is?
Speaker 2 (20:21):
No, because I wouldn't be able to tell you anyway,
but I was thinking mango.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
Oh okay, yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
To make sure these fruits are safe to eat, Philip
decides he's going to wait around until one of the
native animal goes and eats it first, and then study
the reaction it had. You know, their reactions to the fruit.
But the idea of waiting feels next to him possible
because he's already starving. So this desperation leads to a
few close calls, like in one case, Philip finds a
(20:48):
piece of fruit. It looks like an apple to him.
He looks it over. He has no idea what it is,
but he is almost about to eat it, and then
he just decides it's not worth the risk, and he
will later learn it's an extremely toxic fruit called the manchioneal,
which is also known as the death Apple's right there
in the name, right there in his hand.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
I wonder there's there's like some kind of smell that
it's like, you know, cave mambran.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
Yes, it's like no, no, no, he writes later quote
if I had eaten it, it would have been the
death to me. So as days turn to weeks, Philip
manages to find enough fruit for himself to stay alive.
He also finds fresh water very easily him and those
casks it's his specialty. Soon he builds himself a hut
(21:34):
out of palm fronds and tree branches, classic castaway stuff.
But of course it's all exhausting for him. He's constantly
exerting himself and burning tons of energy during those trecks,
like hunting for supplies and looking for fruit, And although
he's grateful for any sustenance, it's like way more than
he got on that boat. He's struggling to meaningfully refuel.
(21:56):
He needs protein and there isn't any, although it's there.
He crosses paths with countless wild hogs, ducks, pigeons and
deer on the island.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
Oh man, what are the chances?
Speaker 2 (22:11):
He just sent his check to Peta, and there's just
no way he's going to do that something with the soul. No,
he just doesn't have the tools. He would love to
kill any of those animals with joy. One day, as
he walks along the beach, he stumbles upon some tortoise
nests with dozens of small eggs inside. He eats several
of these eggs raw, and will later describe the taste
(22:32):
as quote, not very good. Man, could you do it?
Could you do it?
Speaker 1 (22:37):
Crack an egg? Yes, absolute tortoise egg? How big are those?
Speaker 2 (22:41):
Small? The paper that Maren wrote for me says small,
not very good. I could never you would?
Speaker 1 (22:49):
You could? You could?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
I could after a couple months. Yeah, but fuck yeah,
let's not get into sitution.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
I got a cocktail that has rag in it, but
it tastes like like cocktail with rawag in it. No,
it's not bad, it's not bad.
Speaker 2 (23:02):
Was there any kind of a tortoise essence at all?
Speaker 1 (23:05):
No? Okay, not great?
Speaker 2 (23:06):
Then you weren't on row a ten Island.
Speaker 1 (23:09):
I wasn't starving for a cocktail? Or was it was?
Or was you?
Speaker 2 (23:17):
So months pass and Philip doesn't have a game plan
for anything other than just surviving, and despite this island
being relatively small, every one of Philip's days is filled
with new and terrifying experiences, like when he came upon
a snake that he describes as quote very large, as big,
(23:37):
round as a man's waist, and twelve or fourteen feet long,
and he says, quote the first I saw of these
greatly surprised me, for I was very near to it
when I discovered it to be a living creature. And
then it opened its mouth wide enough to have thrown
a hat into it, and blew out its breath at me.
Speaker 1 (23:58):
Oh, I didn't know that snake did that? I mean,
take a deep sigh like.
Speaker 2 (24:03):
A giant hissing python. Yeah. One positive for Philip is
that he uses his downtime on Roatan while he's not
foraging or building shelter, to improve his swimming skills. But
of course that's also filled with danger, and he later
writes quote another time, as I was swimming, a shark
struck me in the thigh just as I set my
foot to ground, so grounded himself on the shoals and
(24:26):
could not turn himself to come at me with his mouth.
Through the goodness of God, I escaped, falling prey to
his devouring teeth. So a big shark beached itself to
try to eat him and just missed. Essentially. As the
days and weeks go by, Philip becomes increasingly frail, both
physically and of course mentally. His days become monotonous and
(24:49):
they start to blend together. Ben there, Philip wanders up
the same hills, ventures to the same fruit trees, stares
at the same expanse of ocean over and over, day
after day. He starved for human connection, and he hasn't
talked to another human being in months, and complains quote
that parrots here had not even been taught to speak.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
That's his complaint, two stars, that's his The alborithew of
the island.
Speaker 2 (25:15):
Come with me as I explore this island. Then something
unbelievable happens. In November of seventeen twenty three, after being
stranded for around nine months, he suddenly spots a man
rowing toward the island in a canoe. Wow, hey, what
Philip can hardly believe his eyes, and for a second
he thinks he's hallucinating, But when the man comes ashore,
(25:37):
Philip realizes that he is actually real. So he cautiously
approaches this man, who is visibly frightened by Philip and
his crazy, unkempt appearance. So I think nine months at
this point, scraggly beardy, As writer Gregory and Fleming notes, quote,
he stepped back a little, letting the sight of Philip
(25:57):
sink in, and then finally approached and shook his hand. So,
as it turned out, this man is from England, and
he tells Philip he's recently escaped Spaniards on mainland Honduras
who were trying to kill him. The englishman claims he
came to Roatan because he believed it was abandoned. He
doesn't share much more information about himself. He doesn't even
say what his name is, but Philip doesn't care, because
(26:20):
this Englishman came prepared. Philip later writes that the man
brought quote five pounds of pork, a knife, powder, tobacco,
tongs and flint.
Speaker 1 (26:30):
What kind of powder are we talking about, dude, dude,
the old nosecandy little ski party on Roatan, and this
man is thank God kind enough to share all of
these supplies with Philip. I don't think I would like
I was hallucinating that that's lucky.
Speaker 2 (26:46):
It's a dream. After nine months, it's like the dream.
But as grateful as Philip is to have met the stranger,
their time together does not last long. After a few days,
the Englishman says he wants to go to a neighboring
island to scavenge, and but Philip doesn't think that he
is physically up for that task, so he decides to
stay behind, which to me, I'm trying to read between
(27:07):
the lines of like, immediately, did you hate each other?
Speaker 1 (27:09):
Yeah, the shit out of each other.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
It's like a guy from Boston and a British guy.
Speaker 1 (27:15):
I'm just gonna go.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
I feel like I want to just check that other island.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Totally stay here. If you're not up for.
Speaker 2 (27:20):
It, chill, chill underneath this palm tree. You got this.
Speaker 1 (27:24):
Here's some powder. I'll be back.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
Philip's like, cool, cool, cool, I'll watch the powder. So,
as the Englishman climbs into his canoe, he assures Philip
that he will be back soon. I'm just going to
check out this other party and then I'll come back
and we'll totally keep stop.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
Just for this party, and then I'm gonna come back here.
I don't even want to go yeah, but I have
to go to show my face on the siland I
need the credit.
Speaker 2 (27:49):
An hour after the Englishman leaves Roatan, there's severe weather
with quote violent gusts of wind and rain. That Englishman
never returns, So several days past, Philip accepts the fact
that the Englishman is likely never coming back, and he
starts using the supplies the man left behind. He's like,
you mean, three minutes after he left, he's now able
(28:10):
to cut up tortoise meat, crabs, and coconuts, and he
can cook all of it over a fire. He can,
finally say, she himself, and it's all an absolute godsend
for Philip, and he credits the mysterious Englishman for saving
his life. So now it's January of seventeen twenty four.
Philip has been stuck on Roatan for nearly eleven months.
(28:32):
One day, while he's out scavenging, he notices a small
boat that's on the shore. At first, Philip thinks it
could be that englishman's canoe. As he gets closer, he
realizes he's never seen this boat before. It looks more
well designed, and it has a small mast and a sail.
So somehow the boat has washed up ashore without a captain,
(28:53):
so Philip decides to take it for himself. And after
just an empty boat, an empty boat just shows up.
Speaker 1 (28:59):
This guy it's the lucky. I mean, look, he's not lucky,
but keeps getting lucky.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
I mean there's islands that are out there that are
just like all spiders that leterally. You can't go to
them because they're covered in poisonous spiders.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
Yeah, that's real. And he got the one where just
a random really cool English guy with tons of coke
showed up and an.
Speaker 2 (29:21):
Empty fucking boat and like coconuts and limes, like everything
that you need for my tie except for run. Yeah,
and now there's just like, oh, a boat got here.
He's in the perfect jet stream. After a few practice runs,
Philip feels comfortable enough to sail toward nearby islands, hoping
to find someone friendly, not a pirate, who can help
(29:43):
him get back to Massachusetts. So he packs some food
he takes off on a twenty mile sailing journey to
the neighboring island of Guanaja. He doesn't have any maps
or anything. He just has to blindly go out into
the ocean. As he approaches this new island, he sees
a ship in the distance, anchored in this island's bay,
so he's very excited at the possibility of seeing another person,
(30:06):
possibly someone who might be able to help him. But
he also knows this area as a hideaway for pirates,
so chances are it could be a pirate. Philip will
later write quote, I could never entertain the thoughts of
returning on board a pirate ship if I should have
the opportunity, I would rather live and die as I was.
Until he knows who is on that ship, Philip decides
to lay low. He anchors his boat on the other
(30:29):
side of the island and then spends two days cautiously
crossing the island, still barefoot, no sneaky think. One stick snaps.
He freezes for two days, keeps going. When he finally
makes it back over to the bay to do some spying,
the ship is gone. He took too long. Now he's
defeated and exhausted, so Philip slumps down against a tree,
(30:53):
and while still sitting up, he falls asleep, very castaways.
It's unclear how long he dozes off, but the next
thing he remembers is the sound of gunfire close.
Speaker 1 (31:02):
Up twenty five years sleeps.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
When he jumps up, he looks around and sees several
small boats approaching the shore. Philip will later say quote,
I soon turned about and ran as fast as my
sore feet would let me into the bushes. So Philip
will later learn that these men are Spaniards. They likely
think Philip is some sort of political enemy, a pirate,
or a laborer in the illegal lumber trade, which is
(31:29):
now a booming industry in South America. So Philip is
once again running from men who want to capture him.
He manages to hide until the Spaniards leave. When Philip
walks back down to the beach, he sees bullet holes
in the tree where he'd been resting, and they'd only
missed him by inches, So again lucky unlucky. Now Philip
(31:50):
has to hike all the way back to his small
boat because he had to be so sneaky, it takes
him three days to get there. The mosquitoes and the
flies on Guanaha are even worse than they were on Rowatan.
He's being bitten constantly, and he's now running on very
little food and water. He finally gets to hop into
his boat and sail back to Roatan and he gets
(32:10):
there after nightfall, so he goes back to the island.
He has to go back to where he started, so irritating.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:17):
More time passes, and when March seventeen twenty four comes
and goes, he's now been on Roatan for a full year.
His mental and physical health are very fragile. He's rail thin,
he's covered in insect bites, his clothes are torn to shreds.
By June of seventeen twenty four, Philip's benmroon for fifteen months,
(32:37):
and he is so weak that he struggles to make
his once very routine trips across the island for fruit
and water. He now spends much of his time staring
out at the ocean like batsidne. Usually doing this is
pretty uneventful until one day when he sees two small
dots in the water. As they move closer to shore,
Philip sees it's a pair of men in two small canoes.
(33:01):
One of them shouts out in English, who's there. Philip
breathes a little sigh of relief. He yells back that
he's from the Colonies and he's been stuck on this
island for over a year. The men announce that they're
British loggers. They explain that Spaniards are clamping down on
their operations, which are illegal, and that Spaniards are planning
a raid on the logging camp. So these men are
(33:21):
now scouting new potential campsites. So after some back and forth,
the men establish trust with one another, and the duo
and the canoes come ashore. According to Philip, when one
of the men approaches him quote, he started back, frightened
to see such a poor, ragged, lean wand forlorn, wild,
miserable object so near to him. So luckily these men
(33:45):
show Philip kindness. They notice that he is unable to
walk very well at all, so the British loggers decide
to carry him back to their boats. Then they take
him to their logging camp on the neighboring island, and
along the way the men excitedly listen to Philip's outrageous
story of survival, and they offer him some rum which
right he finally has the missing piece, but now the
(34:08):
coconuts and the limes are back on the island.
Speaker 1 (34:10):
Turn around, damn it.
Speaker 2 (34:13):
The RUMs is a bit too strong for Philip, who
gets very very drunk, very quickly.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
It's not an empty stomach, starving for fifteen months. Snack girl.
Speaker 2 (34:22):
No, first you order an awesome blossom, then you get
some piso and chick.
Speaker 1 (34:27):
No, you need a fucking face space out coding.
Speaker 2 (34:32):
Please, So he says about himself drinking this rum quote,
this small quantity, through my long disuse of any liquor
higher spirited than water, and my present weakness through my
animal spirits into such a violent agitation. So you got
shit faced, immediately, shit faced and an asshole drunk.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
Oh no, right on.
Speaker 2 (34:53):
A canoe, get out of here now. At the camp,
Philip is finally surrounded by other people. And this group
consists of eighteen male loggers and a female cook. Ma'am,
are you okay? And they all do their best to
take care of Philip. He's given new clothes, a much
needed bare of shoes, deer meat and pork, and the
(35:15):
time to recover and gain strength. After several weeks, Philip
is well enough to help the loggers build a new
camp back on Roatan. So he's back. Yes, he's back
home or belongs man. Then, in August of seventeen twenty four,
a ship called the Diamond stops near this logging camp.
The Diamond wasn't supposed to pass through the area, but
(35:37):
storms pushed its journey south. So now the ship's crew
is in desperate need of fresh water. They got it
on Rowtan. Turns out this vessel is from Massachusetts, just
like Philip. Even more bizarrely, the Diamond Sets sailed just
a few miles from Philip's coastal hometown. But the most
fateful twist in this wild story is that Philip knows
(35:59):
the Diamonds captain their acquaintances from back home. Shit, They're like,
didn't you work a seven eleve?
Speaker 1 (36:05):
Hey, this is seven and all I used to go
to every morning, ye old seven eleven ye old.
Speaker 2 (36:12):
No slurpees, just grog. So that captain, who Philip simply
refers to as Captain Dove, immediately and enthusiastically agrees to
take Philip home, and with that, his long journey finally
ends in May of seventeen twenty five, when he arrives
at Salem Harbor on the Diamond. This is nearly three
(36:32):
full years after he was first taken prisoner by ned Low.
Speaker 1 (36:36):
Three full years real shitty years.
Speaker 2 (36:39):
Yeah, Philip says, quote, I went the same evening to
my father's house where I was received as one coming
to them from the dead. I bet knock, knock knock. Yeah,
can you imagine?
Speaker 1 (36:50):
Oh my god?
Speaker 2 (36:51):
And they're like, what's this beard? Look, it's no take
off those kulottes. They don't look good on you. As
Philip readjusts to his old he must come to terms
with all that's happened to him. He knows very well
that he cheated death countless times. I mean, the idea
that that ship just got blown off course it's the
only reason they were there, Yeah, is crazy, all of it. Tragically,
(37:13):
Philip learns that his dear childhood friend Joseph Libby, who
saved his life, wasn't so lucky. According to the New
England Historical Society quote, while Philip lingered a castaway on
a Caribbean island, Libby met his death by hanging in
Rhode Island with twenty five other pirates.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
Who oh so because he said yes to being a pirate. Yeah,
even though a pirate.
Speaker 2 (37:35):
Yeah, it was like to try to stay alive and
stay alive in an okay way.
Speaker 1 (37:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:40):
And they don't care, No, they don't care about that.
It's trader behavior. Right before long, Philip is encouraged to
write his story, and his memoirs published in seventeen twenty five,
soon after he returns to Massachusetts. It's very short, and
it's very much written in the vernacular of the day,
so it is a bit of a danse read. This
(38:01):
is Maren's Maren's like commentary.
Speaker 1 (38:04):
On I tried Karen Look.
Speaker 2 (38:07):
But you can find it if you want to read
it online under a couple of different titles. One is
Stranded in Rowtan, The True Account of Escape from Pirates.
After this Mamour is published, some people wonder if Philip
made the whole thing up.
Speaker 1 (38:21):
Can you imagine going through that and then being like.
Speaker 2 (38:24):
Liar, It's like, sorry, so you said you immediately found coconuts, right.
And one of the reasons people think it's made up
is because the book Robinson Crusoe had just come out
and was super popular, So people are just like, oh,
you just showed up and basically told the same story, right,
and to make money. But as unbelievable as it all sounds,
no one has ever been able to disprove Philip's story,
(38:45):
and many parts of it have been corroborated.
Speaker 1 (38:47):
About all the other the other sailors.
Speaker 2 (38:50):
Yeah, I mean, nameless English guy doesn't help anything. Why
didn't you insist upon I thought there would be a
reveal later.
Speaker 1 (38:57):
Yeah, take a photo of his driver's license, be.
Speaker 2 (39:00):
Like, look, it's Jack the Ripper.
Speaker 1 (39:04):
That's what he did, silent.
Speaker 2 (39:05):
He didn't want to give his name. We don't know
much about Philip past this chapter in his life, but
by most accounts, his memoir and his momentary fame don't
fundamentally change his life. He goes right back to his
work as a fisherman. He gets married, he has some kids,
and the rest of his life is pretty hazy. We
do know that he dies in seventeen forty six, in
(39:26):
his early forties. So to this day, Philip Ashton's unlikely
survival story is widely accepted to actually happened, although even
Philip himself seems to be in disbelief over everything that
he went through, writing in his memoir the quote, I
cannot take notice of the strange concurrence of divine providence
all along, in saving from the rage of the pirates
(39:47):
and the malice of the Spaniards, from the beasts of
the field and the monsters of the sea, in keeping
me alive amid so many deaths in such a lonely
and helpless condition, and in bringing about my deliverance. And
that's the story of Castaway Philip Ashton.
Speaker 1 (40:03):
Oh my god, the luckiest man in seventeen twenty four.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
Yeah wow, aside from ned Low, the super pirate who
just got to kill and cut off lips.
Speaker 1 (40:13):
Yeah, he's just like thinking of the worst possible way
to torture someone here.
Speaker 2 (40:20):
Cut off your lips, fry him up, yeah, and you
eat him.
Speaker 1 (40:22):
Make fun of my name again, yeah, make fun of
net Ned.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
You don't like the name net that's pussy Okay.
Speaker 1 (40:27):
Oh okay, Wow, great job. Great solo story.
Speaker 2 (40:30):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (40:31):
That was fun.
Speaker 2 (40:31):
See solo story. It was fun. It's a fun jaunt,
which is what we need sometime venture totally these days.
Speaker 1 (40:40):
Chop, thank you. Well we did it. You did it,
I did it. I didn't do much.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
You did what you're supposed to do. Show my feet,
get those tootsies up there and make us some money.
Speaker 1 (40:52):
Let's get on the only fans.
Speaker 2 (40:58):
You mean feet pit.
Speaker 1 (41:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (41:01):
Yeah, well, good job. Thanks everybody.
Speaker 1 (41:03):
Thanks for listening.
Speaker 2 (41:04):
You guys, yeah, thanks for being here. Thanks for being
so understanding about the fact that we were trying to
do many things at one time.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
That's right, and you know, be women of the world.
Speaker 2 (41:13):
Yeah, that's right. You love it when we do that.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
That's your favorite part of this podcast.
Speaker 2 (41:17):
It really is say sexy and don't get murdered.
Speaker 1 (41:20):
Goodbye, Elvis, Do you want a cookie?
Speaker 2 (41:30):
This has been an Exactly Right production.
Speaker 1 (41:31):
Our senior producers are Alejandra Keck and Molly Smith.
Speaker 2 (41:34):
Our editor is Aristotle os Veto.
Speaker 1 (41:36):
This episode was mixed by Leona Squalacci.
Speaker 2 (41:38):
Our researchers are Maaron McGlashan and Ali Elkin.
Speaker 1 (41:41):
Email your hometowns to My Favorite Murder at gmail dot com.
Speaker 2 (41:44):
Follow the show on Instagram at my Favorite Murder.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
Listen to My Favorite Murder on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
Speaker 2 (41:52):
And now you can watch us on Exactly Right's YouTube page.
While you're there, please like and subscribe.
Speaker 1 (41:57):
Goodbybye.
Hosts And Creators
Georgia Hardstark
Karen Kilgariff
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