April 9, 2025 • 41 mins
In this episode, Gandhi and Diamond talk with Leighton Campbell about his latest book, Your Happiness Equation. Are we truly happy, are we part of meaningful groups, how is social media impacting all of this, why is Gandhi so delusional?
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
What's up in sauce on the side, And I am
here with Diamond, who's not feeling something that one of
our guests did in the past. So I'm super stoked
because literally earlier this week, the news came out that Colossal,
the company Colossal and our dude Ben Lamb from one.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Of our really early episodes, What are you looking at?
Speaker 3 (00:23):
Elvis has on a suit or like a blazer.
Speaker 4 (00:26):
I swear to god, he just walked.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
By his back.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
Oh man, we're screwed.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
We have an event today.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
No, I'm just gonna let this keep going.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Where are you going? He's going to this event that
we're all going to? But I was told you didn't
need a suit.
Speaker 3 (00:45):
Make it seem like you're underdressed.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
I mean, I am what he's wearing sweary. She told
me she was wearing like a jacket and jeans and sneakers.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
You're such a.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
Dick now, because that is giving. I'm going to a
wedding or funeral, That's what.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
It looks like.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
He's going to bust in here to and be like,
oh need got very watch he did almost did.
Speaker 3 (01:03):
Yeah, But I love Dacy.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
So one we're recording early and two what were we talking.
Oh yeah, Ben Lamb from Colossal. They just brought back
the dire wolves, which is super cool, and everyone's saying
why dire wolves were real? They were from Game of
Thrones and also just history. But there's reasoning why they're
doing some of the things that they're doing, and apparently
bringing back these dire wolves will help to protect the
(01:28):
red wolf population and diversify their DNA so that they
continue to thrive.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
So that could be cool.
Speaker 4 (01:35):
It's not cool.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
You're not feeling anyone know, because this opens the door to.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
Things that I don't want to see. Number One, I
don't want to see a dire wolf. I didn't want
to see a wooly mouse either. I already am terrified
of rodents. Why would I want to see a new species.
You don't think they're a cute species? No, wow, No,
because they creep me out. The next thing, you know,
we're going to bring back cavemen and dinosaurs.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
Or so they don't even happen.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
I don't know if you've seen what's happening in the world,
but they're back.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
But we're gonna bring back dinosaurs. We don't even know
what they really looked like. So we're just gonna manipulate
and play with DNA. I don't know about that.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
I don't think they're gonna bring back dinosaurs because I
don't think they have a reason to bring back dinosaurs.
Speaker 3 (02:15):
Do you think they have a reason to bring back
the wooly mouse.
Speaker 1 (02:18):
Yes, because it's a step to getting to the wooly mammoth,
which will then help save the Asian elephant population and
bring back flora that has been gone for a long time.
That if we can bring it, maybe the Earth will
be changed and saved.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
You're not down to save the earth.
Speaker 4 (02:32):
We will not live to see this.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
Do you see how the world is right now? Diamonds?
Speaker 1 (02:37):
But if they're bringing these animals back, who's to say
that there's not technology out there, which we know there
already is that can just make you live forever.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
I have I don't know if quantum Yeah, well, I
used to want to live forever, but now I'm very
I'm becoming a very pessimistic person. Like I don't want
to say that.
Speaker 4 (02:57):
You say it, no, I can't, but listen.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
If I'm not meant to live forever, then maybe there's
a reason I don't want to see what the world
is going to be like in the next few months,
not in the next few years.
Speaker 1 (03:09):
See, I'm like a I think I'm more of a
hopeful person where I think things are bad right now
and everybody feels it.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
We all know it.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
I don't care what your politics are, you know in
your heart things are not great right now. This is
not the happiest time of our lives. This is not
the most politically amazing time of our lives, more peaceful,
none of that. But I think everything goes through a cycle,
and I think this is just the downside of that cycle,
and hopefully it will come back up. Sure, I've never
seen such a downside of my life, however, and.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
This is coming from someone who has lived through how
many unprecedented times.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
All of them.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
This is the worst, literally everything I used to be
afraid of as a little kid. Global warming, tornadoes all
over the place, pandemics, a depression or recession, if that's
what you want to call it in fancy terms whatever.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
I was like, Oh, I hope those things ever happen,
and my parents will be like, that's never gonna happen
to you. Don't worry.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
People aren't gonna let these things take flight and here.
We are just fucking flying through it.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
It's crazy.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
But it's funny that we're talking about all this because
our episode today.
Speaker 2 (04:11):
Is about happiness. Oh yes, feeling good? No, yeah, sure, no.
Speaker 3 (04:18):
It's very hard to be happy right.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Now, it is.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
But you know what, I am stubborn and I just
refuse to let people snatch my joy. Like there's so
much that we can still be happy about on this planet.
We have good lives, we have healthy families, we have,
you know, a lot of good stuff going for us.
We're in careers that we like, knock on wood, We're pretty.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Healthy at the moment.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
You know, none of those things stay, and I think
even the bad times they don't say. That is why
I have tattooed across my heart.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
This too shall pass, because on.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Your best days and your worst days, it's not gonna
be there forever. So just feel it at that moment.
And right now we're really feeling some shit, So let's
talk about happiness. Sure recorded this episode to be completely honest,
and I know what my happiness score was, and I
was thinking I was a little delusional. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
I think I'm gonna keep it.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
You're crazy, Yeah, get to Okay. His name is Layton Campbell.
Fun fact about Layton, I actually grew up with his
little brothers, the middle There are five kids in the family,
and I grew up with his middle brother and then
met his second to youngest brother when I was in college,
and then I met him, So I've known them like
(05:29):
the family for a very long time. And he wrote
a book about being happy and I think all of
us could use that some Moreland honors.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
So here's Layton.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
All right, I am here with Layton Campbell. High Layton,
who it's It's you just called me Mata, which is
very funny because obviously I've known you for a very
long time.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
Because now when I.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
Meet people specifically through work, they all call me by
my last name, which is Gandhi. And then when anyone
drops that, people say, who's up?
Speaker 4 (05:59):
Who's his person? I'm an insider.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
You are an insider. So I have you here for
a lot of reasons. One, you came to town and
you've had a good time.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
Right, amazing you saw Othello.
Speaker 4 (06:08):
It was absolutely amazing. People need to go see it.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Really. Yeah, what was so great about it?
Speaker 4 (06:14):
Well, first of all, I love Denzel okay, and he
was awesome. And I went to see Denzel, but Jake
Jenlellen Hall. I probably didn't pronounce that right. Did he
stole the show?
Speaker 1 (06:25):
Really?
Speaker 4 (06:26):
He was absolutely fabulous. Go for Denzel, fall in love
with Jake?
Speaker 1 (06:31):
What a good review? Did you guys pay ten thousand
dollars for these tickets because we heard they were through
the roof crazy?
Speaker 4 (06:36):
We got a discount nine thousand.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
Oh wow, thank god, glad you did that.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
This New York crisis. It's amazing.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
All right.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
So I have you here for a specific reason because
you have been talking about something, writing about something, and
researching a little bit something that is really close to
my heart and all of our hearts, which is happiness,
something Diamond could find a little more of at some
point that was actually a pretty happy person, I think.
But you have a book, the Happiness Equation, where you
talk about the things that make us happy. There's a
(07:05):
test you can take, by the way, if you go
to your happiness eq dot com.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
Correct, you can take the test.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
It's seven questions and based on the answers to those
seven questions, you are going to get a score.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
And then you can start doing the.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Work on yourself to figure out why is my score
what it is?
Speaker 2 (07:18):
And here's where I'm nervous.
Speaker 4 (07:20):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
I took the tests. First time I took it, I
swear I got a ninety seven.
Speaker 4 (07:24):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
I was talking to your brother about it. He's like,
I don't think anyone's ever gotten a ninety seven. Hi,
you take it again.
Speaker 2 (07:31):
So I took it again that time I got a
ninety five.
Speaker 4 (07:33):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
I may be delusional about my answers.
Speaker 4 (07:37):
Maybe not. I mean from an outsider's view, you know,
I think you're doing in terms of the quiz and
the questions and all that, I can see why you
would score high in a lot of these categories. That's nice.
It's up to you to determine, like how you show
up in different areas. But you saying that you have
a high score is not surprising to me.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
Okay. So Diamond, will you come over to this mic
first second, because I want us both to answer these
questions together. Okay, So give.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
Us the questions and I think we'll both tell you
where we fell on this.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Okay, So the first.
Speaker 4 (08:10):
One, first one is are your basic human needs being met?
Speaker 1 (08:12):
Yes?
Speaker 4 (08:13):
Okay. Second one, do you belong to any groups that
meet regularly and are meaningful to you.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
Yes, yes, I guess she started to say no, but
then I told her that you said this show could
be a meaningful group, and she went back and said yes, sure.
Speaker 4 (08:26):
And also her context for your listeners and viewers, it's
your family can be that group also, Okay, you know.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
So, yes, she's very close with her family one hundred percent.
Speaker 4 (08:35):
The idea is where I'm trying to identify people who
wake up, go to work, come home, they say hi,
and buy to people, but they have no meaningful connections
with other people. Those are the people that really I'd
like to shake them out of that potentially and have
them go and connect with other people.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Okay, So that's kind of getting harder and harder though now,
because as much as we have more technology, it's actually
disconnecting people more than connecting people, because you feel like
you're talking. I'm guilty of this. I feel like I'm
talking to people. Oh yeah, I know what so and
so is doing. I don't know if I've actually talked
to that person in months, but I see what they're
doing on Instagram and I think, yep, I know what's
(09:11):
going on in your life.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
No, I don't. I know what I put on Instagram,
people think they know what's going on in my life.
No it's not.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Yeah, it's you know, we only put the best stuff
on there, so that connection seems to be really disconnected anymore.
Speaker 4 (09:22):
Yeah, So I talk about that in the book. Technology
is not going anywhere. It makes no sense to even
try and do that.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
I'm like, unplug it, find it, and unplug.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
It wherever it is if you can.
Speaker 4 (09:31):
If that is for your life, sure, one hundred percent.
But trying to make a societal move where we're gonna
like get off of social media not happening. It's not
going anywhere. So I think online friends, chat groups, social media,
all that stuff has its place and can be awesome.
And not trying to tell anybody to go away from it.
But what I am encouraging people, and it's in the
book also, is you need to go and have a
(09:53):
group of people that you physically meet with in person,
that you hug, handshake, icon tech, the whole human thing,
the way we were designed to be like communal creatures.
You have to scratch that itch, and technology is not
going to do it. So I'm not trying to replace
technology tell people to stop. I'm just telling them you
need to add the component of having a physical group
(10:15):
of people that you meet.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
With, because vibrations are real and you feed off of
each other and you need a human connection. I know
when we stayed home during COVID, we actually broadcast from
home for like a.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
Year and a half.
Speaker 4 (10:25):
Oh wow, it was forever.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
I know you're from Florida, so there was like novid
down there. I just kept going normally.
Speaker 4 (10:31):
What was going on?
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Yeah, my parents are in Tampa, and they're like, no,
everyone's fine. People's faces. So it really changed for us,
and I realized how much I disliked working remotely in
this specific job and how important these weirdos really are
to me in my life.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
Diamond is one of my.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
Favorite people who I actually between every break on the air,
I go into her studio and sit with her and
we just like talk about other stuff that has nothing
to do with what's going on in here, and I
don't know what I do, No, I do know what
I would do without that, And it was terrible.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
I hated it.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
I loved it.
Speaker 2 (11:07):
Diamond is one step away from being a female insel.
Speaker 1 (11:13):
That hurts. That hurts no, but she's very happy. She's
very content being at home watching her shows, hanging out
with her family, and that's it. She doesn't care much
about the rest of it.
Speaker 3 (11:24):
The thing that I think I have that maybe a
lot of people don't have is I live in the
house with multip like my entire family.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
So you love yeah, you actually like them.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
I'm in the house with people all day.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
I loved it.
Speaker 3 (11:35):
Yeah, we were in your room now, mom like things
like that.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
Yeah, that's right, So that's good. So one of the
things that Diamond and I were actually talking about today
speaking of social media and human connection. And you have kids,
So how old is your oldest child? Eighteen, so you
definitely will know about this. You've noticed such a rise
for years at this point of people being sad and
instead of taking it to friends, they take it to
(12:01):
social media and they are crying and they pick up
a camera and they start to record themselves and then
they post that online for other people that they have
no connection with, and they do not know to come
and leave them comments that could be good comments or
they could be terrible comments. What is this about and
how do you think that impacts happiness?
Speaker 4 (12:19):
Okay, can't speak to this from personal experience because in
our household, the rule is no social media until you're
a senior in high school. And when you're a senior
in high school, you have no rules, no curfew, You
can come and go, you do whatever you want. And
the idea is you're about to go to college anyway,
or you're going about to start your life, whatever's next
for you, So we want to you to have a
(12:40):
training wheels year where you can do whatever you want
because we're right around the corner from us not even
really having any control of your life anyway. So that
was our rule. So we never experienced that with my son,
and we have you know, three others that are coming
right behind them, and it worked so far. You know,
we'll see where it goes. But I don't know what
that's like like because my kids haven't done it. And
(13:02):
then when we released him to the wild, he's like, uh,
I don't even really want to be on it that much.
He's on it now and he has like he's one
of those people. He follows people, but he has no
posts that's like his vibe unless there is a hidden
burner account that he's crying and spilling his guts and
(13:24):
how I'm a bad father. And all that we have
a great relationship, but it's possible he's got a secret account.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
One of the things that you talked about was dopamine
and sort of instant gratification. And I think because Diamond
was saying, this phenomenon of people crying in the phone
and like posting it all the time is becoming normal
to people.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
That's a very normal thing.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
Like it's the last thing I would ever think of that.
I'm sad and I'm crying, my face is puffy and
there's like SnO coming out of my nose, and I
pick up a camera like this is me, guys, let's
talk about it. I don't want people to see that.
But she's saying it's becoming normal, and in my head,
I just think there's nothing normal about that. Normal is
connecting with human not connecting with a bunch of strangers who,
let's be honest, have of them.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
We're gonna shit on you for this. What are you doing?
Speaker 3 (14:05):
Yeah, I think I look at my little cousins. It's
not normal for us, right because we grew up without
social media and crying online would get you clowned by everyone.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Now it's like, okay, we.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
Have to take care of people's feelings and be more
sensitive with them so they feel like at least my
little cousins, they have pictures of them crying, like they
pick up the phone cry take a picture, So send
it to our chat. Our group chat is literally called
real tears because we make fun of them. And so
now they're like, Okay, we're not gonna post it online,
but we're gonna send it to you guys. But they
(14:35):
think it's normal. I'm like, this is a little nuts.
Speaker 4 (14:38):
Yeah, I think it's that may be one of those dopamine,
you know, hit type of things, because you put that
out there and now you're getting comments, you're getting likes,
you get into the people who sympathize with you, which
is one level of probably dopamine. Then you get the
haters and the trolls. That's probably even you're getting something
out of that as well too. It's negative, but it's
(15:01):
like I'm getting interaction. It's like the one of the
worst things for a post, and I've done this. I
think everybody's done it. At some point. You make the
best post in the world and literally nobody cares.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
I got shadow Band because apparently Instagram flagged me as
a pedophile for some reason. And I'm not kidding baby
in hot, you're not only allowed to use those terms together.
Speaker 4 (15:20):
Okay, hot problematic.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
Yeah, it's a constant problem over here. Do you take
it down or you just leave it?
Speaker 4 (15:26):
I leave it. I leave everything up. I open booked.
It's like, it is what it is, it's who I am.
Take her or leave it.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
Because it doesn't give you a sense of worth.
Speaker 1 (15:35):
Or value, not at all.
Speaker 4 (15:37):
It's trying to, you know, help people. Okay, So I
have personal stuff, I have business stuff, I have book stuff.
So I wear a bunch of hats and I just
put it out there. And it's like, if people love it, cool,
If they don't love it, that's cool too.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
It's good that your kids don't have social media then,
because I was going to ask you if they ever
come like, duh, dude, take that down.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
That's so cringey.
Speaker 4 (16:06):
Oh. I run pretty much every post by them, Oh
do you? Oh yeah? And they hate most of it.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
So why do you run it by them?
Speaker 4 (16:12):
Just so they could be like this is you want
to make sure I'm being consistent.
Speaker 1 (16:16):
Fair enough? So okay, this is a yes or no.
Fame is the most deadly drug known to man. I
used to think it was fentanyl, but I'm starting to fame.
Speaker 4 (16:26):
It begins a letter F for sure, one of those.
I could see how that would be problematic, but I
would probably think fame is like money. It doesn't really
change you. It just amplifies a person that you are.
Because I know people who are famous, and they're some
of the coolest people on the planet.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
Name them who.
Speaker 4 (16:43):
I won't name them, damn it.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
Nobody ever falls for that one.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
Go ahead, name it.
Speaker 4 (16:48):
No, I'm not going to say, Okay, yeah, I know
people who have a bunch of money and some of
them are awesome. And then I know the reverse for
for that as well too. They have a bunch of
money and they're really not good people, and they're I think,
for the right person. If you're grounded and you're just
aware that, Okay, I am stepping into something that could
be problematic. If I don't do it right, you're gonna
(17:09):
be fine.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
I think I would get drunk with power. I say
that in my head, but I actually don't know what
would operate any differently, except maybe sometimes I want to
smack a phone out of somebody's stands, And I think
if I had enough money and I had like a
phone slap fund. That's what I would do with it.
Speaker 2 (17:23):
But I'm talking to you. Pay attention to me.
Speaker 1 (17:27):
Diamond actually posed a question to us not too long
ago about well you ask your question.
Speaker 3 (17:33):
Okay, I get long winded, so to be bored.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
We were.
Speaker 3 (17:38):
I don't remember how it came up, but I was
talking to I think it started with Danielle and I
was like, we live a life where we have access
to If we don't have the access ourselves to a
lot of money and experiences, we're very close to.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
People who do have that, right does that? So?
Speaker 3 (17:57):
Would you rather live a life where you know that
access that you have and could have? Like you could
have a lot of money, you see it right there,
but you complain about the random little things, like everyday
things that really don't matter because you like it's like
your life is great.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
You pick little crappy.
Speaker 3 (18:12):
Things to complain about, sure, or would you rather live
like a lot of people in this country who may
not they may be making like minimum wage, and they
find a way to make it happen for themselves because
they think that this is all that life is, and
they're really happy because they don't care about the things
that they don't know are out there for them. Sure, sure,
(18:33):
which one do you think you'd rather?
Speaker 4 (18:35):
I think there are mutually exclusive, Like, it doesn't have
to be one or the other. It's it's happiness and
it's it's going to be different for everybody. And if
you look at our logos and so on, it's half
of a happy face because there's some basic principles, but
you have to figure out the rest, you know. So,
if you're finding happiness working minimum wage, living wherever you live,
(18:59):
and you have happiness and however you're doing it, awesome.
If you have happiness and you either have a bunch
of money or you have access to a bunch of money, awesome.
Now if you don't have happiness and you're in either
of those scenarios, that's where the issues come into play.
So I don't think having one or the other is
really the answer. It's not the answer at all. That's
kind of a recurring pattern that you see with like
(19:24):
high level athletes, like once I win the Super Bowl,
I'm going to be happy. Once I get the gold medal,
I'm going to be happy, and then they get it
and they're very depressed for a lot of them. So
if you think, Okay, I'm making minimum wage or whatever,
and if you're making minimum wage and you can do better,
you should if you want to, and you should. I'm
not telling anybody to stay there or whatever. But if
(19:46):
you think getting that particular job, getting a yacht or
whatever is going to make you happy, you may be
really surprised that you actually get it, and you become
sad because it's not about the It's about the other things.
Your connection to people. You know, how grateful you are
(20:07):
for the things you do have. Those are the things
that are important.
Speaker 1 (20:09):
So we were talking about this lighton and I before
he actually came into the room to do this, about
money and happiness. What is that actual correlation there, because
there were research studies done that say at about seventy
five thousand dollars a year is when people are the
most happy, and that's of course the national average. In
New York you would be poor, so you wouldn't be
happy in New York with that, but other places across
the country seventy five thousand dollars a year and you're
(20:31):
happy because you can take care of most of the
things that you need to take care of. But you're
also not at that point where you're now surrounded by
maybe billionaires, if you're a millionaire and realizing, Wow, there's
so much more that I don't have. But at the
same time, when people say money can't buy you happiness,
it is kind of a croc which Layton is saying
he's seen some more recent research that hasn't really been
(20:52):
vetted all the way but that say, no, there's a
direct correlation between money and happiness.
Speaker 4 (20:56):
Okay, So I saw this literally yesterday and they say
that there is no courtly like above seventy five thousand.
If you make more money, you will continue to be happier.
O dout know that to be true?
Speaker 2 (21:08):
Wait, so you will continue to be happier, Yes, as
you make more money.
Speaker 4 (21:10):
As you make more money, that's true.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
I think so, I think it's true. What I do
think it has a cap.
Speaker 1 (21:16):
So money can't buy you happiness, which is what we
were talking about specifically. It can't buy you happiness, but
it can buy you a lot of the things to
make you happy, like freedom and time, quality time with
your family, good doctors to take care of your health
if you're struggling, the ability to pay your medical bills,
if you have a problem, it can take you there,
I would say, And I have nothing to go on
except my own brain at this point. With this thought,
(21:37):
getting into the millions is probably going to be great.
I don't know that it makes a difference between a
million and a billion, but I also think that a
lot of people who get to millionaire status then just
start to feel as though, Wow, now there's so much more,
and they keep chasing it, sort of to your point,
like the professional athletes, Okay, I got a gold medal, Well,
now I want another one?
Speaker 2 (21:55):
Or do I want another one? This thing hasn't made
me happy. I think to get to.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
A point where you've made billions of dollars, you have
to just be unhappy because you're continuing to chase something.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
My own thought. I don't know any billionaires.
Speaker 4 (22:07):
They're probably really happy billionaires.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
I don't know they seem to Eli almost does not
seem like a heavy person. He kind of seems like
a little turd. They all seem like they were This
is going to be a very antiquated statement, I know it,
but they just seem like they were big dorks who
now have this chip on their shoulder to prove to
the world the unknown, A dork on the richest maleive,
but you're still being dorky about things.
Speaker 4 (22:26):
One thing you mentioned that I think is kind of
important is like, I don't think any amount of money
can make you happy. I think it can contribute to
things that can add to your happiness. And I specifically
talk about this in the book as well too, because
I give people like a toolkit of things to protect
your happiness, and one of the things is be as
financially strong as you can be. It's going to be
(22:48):
different for everybody, but you want to basically have the
things that you need to cover your basic human needs
and emergencies that arise, because without that, I could be problematic.
Speaker 1 (23:01):
And that was all of our thoughts on question two.
So what's the third question in the Happiness The.
Speaker 4 (23:06):
Third question is on an A plus to F scale,
what is the value that you bring to the groups
that you belong to?
Speaker 1 (23:12):
What do you think?
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Diamond?
Speaker 3 (23:13):
I said, C.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
You think you're C.
Speaker 3 (23:15):
I don't know, you know? And I also think it
varies depending on the day, right, Like sometimes I walk
in and I'm like, hey, you know, I'm trying to
give people energy, and sometimes I don't even have the
energy to give. So I'm like, you know whatever, So
I think it balances out.
Speaker 2 (23:30):
So I said, C see that is a balanced answer.
I gave myself an A.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
I was like, I am contributing. I am happy, I'm
coming in here and doing what I need to do.
And I actually wasn't even just specifically thinking about this show.
As the group, we do some volunteer stuff on the
side that actually it makes me really.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
Happy to do it.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
And I'm not sure when I answer that question if
I gave it enough thought of what am I contributing
to the group versus what is that group giving me back?
Because I really like it and I get a lot
out of it, but they are fun. And I mean
even here DuMond, I wouldn't give you a C yesterday.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
He works like twenty.
Speaker 1 (24:03):
Four hours, and I know that just hours isn't enough.
But what you contributed is a lot in that one day,
and you do that every day.
Speaker 4 (24:10):
How does that make you feel? Diamond? When she says
it doesn't somebody sees it.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Everybody sees it. They just don't say it to you
because then they have to pay more save it for
the aircheck. Yeah, I told you that's how you have to.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
Negotiate, taking it right down the hall, take it, take
it to.
Speaker 1 (24:28):
Her, and let me know how it goes, all right.
Speaker 4 (24:30):
The fourth question fourth question is on an A plus
to F scale. How would you rate your gratitude?
Speaker 2 (24:36):
I am. I would give myself an A.
Speaker 1 (24:38):
Again. Every day I think about I literally wake up
in the morning, I look out my window and I think.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Wow, this is where I live.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
This is crazy, what an amazing city. I feel like
I worked hard to get to something that I always wanted,
and now that I have it, I appreciate it every day.
I appreciate my health. I appreciate my family's health. I
appreciate the health of my friends. That's the biggest one.
I just I think there's so much to be happy for.
And when I go to sleep at night, I don't
say prayers. I'm not really asking for anything.
Speaker 2 (25:06):
But every night I do go through the list of
the things for which I'm grateful, and it makes me happy.
Speaker 4 (25:11):
Because my mother doesn't it.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
There's a lot.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
Today it does make me happy.
Speaker 1 (25:14):
Diamond A, I agree grateful. Yesterday she was talking about
she's just happy to be alive. Yeah, you know what
I mean.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
There are a lot of people like, who I know
a lot of people like grown up in Brooklyn that
aren't with me now that we were like in high school,
and stuff like that. Things happen to people, things happen
to our family members and stuff like that. I'm happy
that my body is healthy. It may not look the
way that I wanted to, but it gets me to
where I need to be every day, you know, so
I'm happy about it.
Speaker 1 (25:41):
Can't really complain.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
I found all that cheers.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
Wait, and you haven't answered your scores on these things,
So start with the first one.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
Basically of being met. Yes, okay, I belong to several
groups that are extremely meaningful to me. For sure. The
value that I bring to those groups, I would say
is about an A.
Speaker 1 (25:58):
Okay.
Speaker 4 (25:58):
Also my gratitude, I would say, I'm like in a
plus territory. That's great because I, first of all, talking
about this stuff all the time just makes it like
I'm preaching to myself. And even I've been in a
couple of months recently, but I've been working on my audiobook,
which is not released to the public yet. But I'm
like talking to myself through my own things that are
(26:21):
going on pretty well. And then the next question I'll
put up to you, and I'll give you my answer
as well, is when a meaningful situation does not go
as expected, negative impact on your emotions lasts three options.
Short time, modern time, long time.
Speaker 1 (26:37):
So before I answer this question, which again I may
have answered in delusion, when you say something meaningful, give
me an example of something meaningful that could go the
wrong way.
Speaker 4 (26:47):
I'm not necessarily talking about like the most tragic things
in life, sure, because that clearly is an another.
Speaker 2 (26:54):
Category, right like when my boyfriend died.
Speaker 4 (26:56):
Not yeah, yeah, so the I'm also not talking about
like super trivial things either, right, meaningful, meaningful. So it
would be like, just off the top of my head,
you not getting into a school that you applied for,
you not getting a grant, you not landing a client
(27:16):
that you were trying to land, or something like that.
Something at work doesn't pan out, Okay.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
So at this point in my life, I would say
I focus on that stuff for a short amount of time.
I think it's taken a long time to get there,
because you realize as you grow up the things you
thought were so serious really weren't that serious. And if
you believe in fate that this is exactly where I'm
supposed to be. So all of these things that didn't
work out got me to where I am, and I'm
supposed to be here, so I don't That's not a
(27:43):
huge thing for me when I don't get my way.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
Well, you, I think the answer was moderate because I'm
still working on that. I'm an overthinker, so if there's
something that goes wrong in my life, I always like,
I rethink what I could have done differently on my part.
Even if the answer is nothing, I still think about it.
But I'm starting to get to the point where I'm like, well,
(28:06):
things happen for a reason.
Speaker 1 (28:07):
It is what it is.
Speaker 3 (28:08):
So we're working our way to short term but I
don't know the overthinker in me, I may never get there.
I'm like, oh my god, I'm thinking about things that
happened in junior high school.
Speaker 4 (28:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:17):
So I got nominated for this award that I've won
a couple times before and I didn't win it this year,
and I got the email and everybody was very apologetic
and weird about it, and I was like, why do
you guys care so much? I'm sure whoever won this
probably deserved it. We'll move on but then I felt
like people were pitying me, and that made me feel weird, like, oh,
we can rebuild for next year. I'm like, I don't care.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
I nominate myself. It's fine what you win.
Speaker 3 (28:38):
So often that they're probably like, give this girl a break.
Speaker 1 (28:41):
Whatever it is. It didn't bother me as much as
seemed to bother other people. And then that made me
take a step back and think.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
Wait, should I be bothered by this?
Speaker 4 (28:48):
You shouldn't be.
Speaker 1 (28:48):
I'm not.
Speaker 4 (28:49):
I let it go as quickly as you can let that.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
Yeah, and be happy for whoever it is. I got
that because I'm sure they really did deserve it and
don't have to go figure out who this person was.
But yeah, I'm sure it was great. Yeah, what about you?
Speaker 4 (28:59):
Like, I'm in the moderate category, really trying to get
too short. One of the things, so a couple things
that I have been doing lately, and this is not
in the book, but it's just the whole idea is
you answer the questions, you see what pings you, and
then you start to work on it. So one of
the things that I tell myself is that I have
to process everything before I can let it go. But
(29:20):
now I stop telling myself that I don't have to
process things. I just let it go. Yes, you know,
like you said, Now, I'm saying this because I'm you.
I'm essentially you. Is like, just let it go. Like
it's hard to do it, but sometimes I can do
it. It's like, you know, I don't need to actually process this,
I'm just let it go. I try and identify as
(29:42):
quickly as possible that I'm holding onto something. Once I realize, oh,
you're holding onto that, then kind of light bulbs go
off in my brain and I'm like, well, why am
I holding onto this? Now I can start doing something
about it, because you can't change anything unless you become
aware of it. And now I am trying to become
aware as quickly as possible that I'm holding onto something.
(30:03):
And then I'm also giving myself the grace that I
don't have to let it go right away, although that
I want to. And that's kind of where I'm at
on that.
Speaker 2 (30:10):
All right, what's the next question?
Speaker 4 (30:21):
So do you believe your life has a purpose?
Speaker 2 (30:23):
I think it does. I don't know what that purpose is.
Does that matter?
Speaker 4 (30:26):
No?
Speaker 1 (30:27):
Because I think there is a purpose, I'm just not
sure that I know what it is yet same.
Speaker 3 (30:32):
I think I said it out loud when I was
doing it. I'm like, I do, but I don't know
what it is yet. So we'll get there. But you know, yeah,
I wouldn't say no. I think everybody's life has a purpose.
Speaker 4 (30:41):
I think everyone's life has a purpose.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
Do you know what your purpose is?
Speaker 4 (30:44):
I do?
Speaker 1 (30:44):
What is your purpose? Or if you're comfortable sharing, If
you're not.
Speaker 4 (30:47):
You don't have I'm not comfortable, no open book. So
I think I was put on this earth to be
a good husband and a good father. Okay, pretty basic,
nothing like earth shattering. But and if you read the book,
you'll hear some of the backstory of my life and
the backstory of my father and how he, you know,
was in our family, which was not good. So part
(31:07):
of that is trying to undo some of the generational
things that have happened in my family. And because I
know my purpose, and I've known it for a very
very long time, since I was a teen, you can
trace everything that I do, the good things. When I'm
at my best, I'm moving towards my purpose. Oh you know,
so even this book, me being here right now all
(31:30):
like everything good that I've ever done in life you
can trace it back to that, which.
Speaker 2 (31:33):
Would bring us to the seventh question, which is on
an A.
Speaker 4 (31:36):
Plus to f scale. How would you rate your progress
to achieving your purpose in life? So, not knowing your purposes,
it would be hard to answer that question I talk about.
Speaker 2 (31:45):
I think I gave myself an eight.
Speaker 1 (31:49):
I don't know what purposes, but yeah, I'm moving in
the right direction.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
To go and retool this now that I'm thinking about
it a little bit more.
Speaker 4 (31:57):
You should try and find out figure out what your
purpose is is in life. But if you don't know,
you should just move in a general direction.
Speaker 2 (32:05):
That's positive Diamond. What do you think you're on the
path to fulfilling your purpose?
Speaker 3 (32:09):
See, because I really didn't know. I don't know what
my purpose is yet, but I would hope that I'm
moving in the right direction. You know, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (32:20):
So sometimes when I think about purpose, I don't know
about the bigger, heavier things. But I think about what
my mom always said, which is what I have tried
to do.
Speaker 2 (32:28):
With my life.
Speaker 1 (32:28):
And I don't know if it's necessarily a purpose, but
it is leave the room better than when you entered.
Metaphorically and literally actually come into a room, if the
chairs are pushed out, push back in.
Speaker 2 (32:38):
And I would like to think that with what.
Speaker 1 (32:40):
We do, sometimes you are leaving the room, that metaphorical
room a little bit better, if it's spreading laughter, if
it's giving people an outlet to talk about something to
a stranger that they didn't want to before. So if
I were to make that my purpose, and then I
would say I'm fulfilling my purpose. I give myself an
a which again could be delusion because I just created it.
I fulfilled it.
Speaker 3 (33:03):
Great.
Speaker 4 (33:04):
Your purpose in life doesn't have to be like care
and cancer. It can and for some people though that
if you're that person, like that's awesome. Leaving the room
better than you found. It could be someone's purpose in
life because if you go through life with that mindset,
like you're setting people up for success, having people enter
a space a literal and a metaphorical space where they're
(33:27):
going to be able to shine and operate at the
highest capacity. So that could be huge, Like you could
be teeing up someone who then goes to cure cancer
because of a space that you left that they entered.
Speaker 1 (33:38):
Yes, I am creating the people who cure cancer. That
is what I'm gonna go.
Speaker 4 (33:42):
Yeah, new tagline, tagline.
Speaker 2 (33:45):
It's all because of us. This is amazing.
Speaker 1 (33:47):
Okay, So this is the question that I wanted to
ask you about like purpose and this entire thing, and
it's a little personal, so you don't have to answer
obviously if you don't want to. Sure, are you in
therapy or have you been to therapy?
Speaker 4 (33:56):
I have been to therapy in the past. I'm not
currently in therapy therapy, but I have like therapy like
stuff lined up shortly, Okay.
Speaker 1 (34:05):
Because I was going to say, we have conversations about
this all the time. How important do you feel therapy
is to self discovery?
Speaker 4 (34:12):
Okay? Therapy is kind of complicated for me because I've
had bad therapists and I've had therapists who give really
bad advice, So that is very harmful. If you can
get a good therapist, that is like gold. But if
you have a bad therapist, and it's really hard to
know if you have a bad therapist, because a good
therapist is probably going to challenge you and the conversations
(34:34):
are going to be difficult. I don't know how to
tell people if they have a good one or not.
But I know that having a good one is great
and having a bad one is really bad.
Speaker 1 (34:42):
That's fair. I mean the same as we would say
with any doctor. You have to find a right fit,
somebody that actually makes you feel like you're being heard,
you're being seen, you're being listened to.
Speaker 2 (34:50):
All of that's important.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
Diamond will tell you the most selfish person that you've
ever met in your life is somewhere in a therapist's
office being told that they need to be more selfish. Absolutely,
She's like, it has ruined everybody.
Speaker 3 (35:00):
Yeah, it has. I'm terrified to go to therapy just
because I'm scared that I'm gonna have a bad therapist
and think that they're amazing and walk through life hurting
people because I need to be selfish. I need to
put myself first. And I'm like, it's not fair.
Speaker 4 (35:18):
I would Who am I? What do I know? If
being selfish is something that pings you for like a therapist,
not being aligned with your values, being selfless is a
good thing to a degree. You can take anything like
too far. But if you go into a therapist's office
and they're like it's all about you, probably time for
a U turn.
Speaker 1 (35:37):
So of the seven different questions, if you had to
isolate one of them as the start here to find
a little more happiness in your life, or at least
identify the things that you think are missing.
Speaker 2 (35:49):
Which question is it.
Speaker 4 (35:51):
Do you belong to meaningful groups that meet regularly? Yeah,
we talked about this a little bit. But online interactions,
friendships and so on, they have their place, but they're
not supposed to replace physical meeting and being physically in
the same place as people. We are communal creatures. It's
just a fact you need to be around other people.
(36:12):
That's where I would start.
Speaker 1 (36:13):
All right. So if we want to find your book,
where are we going to find it?
Speaker 4 (36:16):
So you go to our website. It's your happiness eq
dot com. You can get your completely free happiness score.
You know, our social media links and all that are
in there.
Speaker 2 (36:26):
Too, And the happiness score is really easy to get to.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
It's not one of those things where you have to
put in your email address and then they send you
the information. You take those seven questions and you get
your answer back and you click on the little plus
button up at the top right corner. Some people were
looking for it, so that's where you get your happiness
score and you get the book. Can you also buy
it on Amazon. For sure you get more money though
if they go to your site.
Speaker 4 (36:45):
No, actually I don't. I'm sure you could. I'm not
really doing this for the money necessarily. But the link
on our site takes you to Amazon, so okay, yeah,
I don't fulfilled books. I don't have like a garage
full of books. You go to our website, you can
click on that link. You'll take you to Amazon. But
you could go anywhere that you buy books and our
book will be there.
Speaker 2 (37:02):
Awesome. And you're working on the audiobook, so we're looking
forward to hearing that. Is it you that's reading it?
Speaker 4 (37:07):
Sure is? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (37:07):
Well, congratulations on everything, and it's nice to see you
after so long.
Speaker 4 (37:11):
Yeah, it's been too long.
Speaker 2 (37:12):
Next time I come down to Miami because we're down
there all the time.
Speaker 4 (37:14):
Cool for work?
Speaker 2 (37:16):
All right, thanks Layton, thank you?
Speaker 1 (37:28):
All right, Diamond, after that conversation, did you feel anything
at all? I'm not saying you needed to feel happier,
but did you in any way feel like you had
things you could identify that make you happy or that
you want to work on.
Speaker 3 (37:40):
Yes, and no, I want to find my purpose, okay,
but I really don't feel like I have to like
search and dig and like do some like grand journey
to discover what my purpose is. I feel like it'll
come to me, like whatever. But I'm grateful. And that
was one of the things that I really liked about
his his questions, like are you grateful for the life
(38:03):
you have? And I'm like, yeah, I've always been grateful.
That's you know, some people aren't. And I guess that's
what makes you unhappy. That's sad.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
I think that.
Speaker 1 (38:10):
And I know that it's so easy to just blame
social media for the downfall of everything, but I do
think it's really tough to be happy if you're constantly
comparing yourself to other people in a world of everything
that's fake because how many people do you know that
you know in real life what they're like, and then
you see what they post online and you're like, girl,
please yeah, or sir please yeah, give me a break.
Speaker 3 (38:32):
Who are you exactly the person I know?
Speaker 2 (38:35):
Exactly?
Speaker 3 (38:35):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (38:35):
So I think social media taking a big step away
from it's probably really helpful. A study just came out
the other day that said women are more negatively impacted
by social media than men are because of the outside judgment,
because how many times do you see a picture of
a beautiful woman posted and these fucking trolls from the
depths of hell crawl out of their crypt to tell
(38:56):
her she's fat, or to.
Speaker 2 (38:58):
Say I wouldn't hit that. Sir, you haven't hit anything
in the last decade. You incel good day. Yeah, and
you know people don't do that to men.
Speaker 1 (39:07):
There are rarely times where a guy puts a picture
and girls slide in under there like fat. I wouldn't
hit that.
Speaker 2 (39:12):
Oh, I know.
Speaker 1 (39:13):
I turn about is fair play, but let me tell
you from someone who's done it a few times, you
will get flagged as a bully.
Speaker 2 (39:20):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (39:21):
So, you know, not the greatest, But in that one second,
it does feel good just to be like.
Speaker 4 (39:27):
You're insane and it makes me happy.
Speaker 2 (39:29):
And my happiness score is ninety five, so join me.
Speaker 3 (39:31):
Your happiness score is a part of your delusion. Okay,
you are not.
Speaker 1 (39:37):
There's no way, why why who do I have to
be sad about?
Speaker 3 (39:42):
You don't have anything to be sad about. But the
answers to your questions, I'm like, that's questionable.
Speaker 2 (39:48):
What is my contribution to groups around me?
Speaker 3 (39:50):
Hey?
Speaker 2 (39:50):
Plus to you? Yeah, but it is to me. This
is about me?
Speaker 1 (39:55):
How do I feel about these things? So if I
live in a land of delusion, but I'm happy my land.
Speaker 4 (40:00):
Baby God, she's crazy.
Speaker 2 (40:02):
Welcome, send help. Who are you gonna send?
Speaker 4 (40:07):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (40:08):
Who's somebody that could.
Speaker 1 (40:09):
Like instantly make you unhappy?
Speaker 4 (40:14):
Doctor Oz?
Speaker 2 (40:17):
That was so random.
Speaker 1 (40:19):
All the people in the world.
Speaker 3 (40:21):
It's doctor, doctor Oz, doctor Phil. There are so many
more people. What's her name? From Fox? The Black Woman?
Candae Owans throw her on the list?
Speaker 2 (40:37):
Is like her.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
Name is like something hot.
Speaker 2 (40:41):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (40:42):
I could see her just face right now. Yep, Harris Faulkner, Yep, yep,
just just she makes me want to throw up. She's
a beautiful woman, but when she opens her damn mouth,
(41:02):
I'm like, you motherfucker.
Speaker 2 (41:04):
Like Stacy Dash Oh, she looks like a ghost. She
looks crazy as hell.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
She really did not like being black, and she tried
everything she could to change it.
Speaker 2 (41:13):
It's crazy. And on that note, happy happy Day.
Speaker 1 (41:16):
Everybody, go get the book Diamond. If people want to
find you online, where can they find you?
Speaker 3 (41:22):
At? Diamond? Sincere on Instagram? I'm kind of over Twitter,
so whatever.
Speaker 1 (41:27):
Yeah, it's a dark place at baby Hot Sauce on
Instagram and we'll see you next time. Say bye bye,
What's up in sauce on the side, And I am
here with Diamond, who's not feeling something that one of
our guests did in the past. So I'm super stoked
because literally earlier this week, the news came out that Colossal,
the company Colossal and our dude Ben Lamb from one.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Of our really early episodes, What are you looking at?
Speaker 3 (00:23):
Elvis has on a suit or like a blazer.
Speaker 4 (00:26):
I swear to god, he just walked.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
By his back.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
Oh man, we're screwed.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
We have an event today.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
No, I'm just gonna let this keep going.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Where are you going? He's going to this event that
we're all going to? But I was told you didn't
need a suit.
Speaker 3 (00:45):
Make it seem like you're underdressed.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
I mean, I am what he's wearing sweary. She told
me she was wearing like a jacket and jeans and sneakers.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
You're such a.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
Dick now, because that is giving. I'm going to a
wedding or funeral, That's what.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
It looks like.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
He's going to bust in here to and be like,
oh need got very watch he did almost did.
Speaker 3 (01:03):
Yeah, But I love Dacy.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
So one we're recording early and two what were we talking.
Oh yeah, Ben Lamb from Colossal. They just brought back
the dire wolves, which is super cool, and everyone's saying
why dire wolves were real? They were from Game of
Thrones and also just history. But there's reasoning why they're
doing some of the things that they're doing, and apparently
bringing back these dire wolves will help to protect the
(01:28):
red wolf population and diversify their DNA so that they
continue to thrive.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
So that could be cool.
Speaker 4 (01:35):
It's not cool.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
You're not feeling anyone know, because this opens the door to.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
Things that I don't want to see. Number One, I
don't want to see a dire wolf. I didn't want
to see a wooly mouse either. I already am terrified
of rodents. Why would I want to see a new species.
You don't think they're a cute species? No, wow, No,
because they creep me out. The next thing, you know,
we're going to bring back cavemen and dinosaurs.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
Or so they don't even happen.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
I don't know if you've seen what's happening in the world,
but they're back.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
But we're gonna bring back dinosaurs. We don't even know
what they really looked like. So we're just gonna manipulate
and play with DNA. I don't know about that.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
I don't think they're gonna bring back dinosaurs because I
don't think they have a reason to bring back dinosaurs.
Speaker 3 (02:15):
Do you think they have a reason to bring back
the wooly mouse.
Speaker 1 (02:18):
Yes, because it's a step to getting to the wooly mammoth,
which will then help save the Asian elephant population and
bring back flora that has been gone for a long time.
That if we can bring it, maybe the Earth will
be changed and saved.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
You're not down to save the earth.
Speaker 4 (02:32):
We will not live to see this.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
Do you see how the world is right now? Diamonds?
Speaker 1 (02:37):
But if they're bringing these animals back, who's to say
that there's not technology out there, which we know there
already is that can just make you live forever.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
I have I don't know if quantum Yeah, well, I
used to want to live forever, but now I'm very
I'm becoming a very pessimistic person. Like I don't want
to say that.
Speaker 4 (02:57):
You say it, no, I can't, but listen.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
If I'm not meant to live forever, then maybe there's
a reason I don't want to see what the world
is going to be like in the next few months,
not in the next few years.
Speaker 1 (03:09):
See, I'm like a I think I'm more of a
hopeful person where I think things are bad right now
and everybody feels it.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
We all know it.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
I don't care what your politics are, you know in
your heart things are not great right now. This is
not the happiest time of our lives. This is not
the most politically amazing time of our lives, more peaceful,
none of that. But I think everything goes through a cycle,
and I think this is just the downside of that cycle,
and hopefully it will come back up. Sure, I've never
seen such a downside of my life, however, and.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
This is coming from someone who has lived through how
many unprecedented times.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
All of them.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
This is the worst, literally everything I used to be
afraid of as a little kid. Global warming, tornadoes all
over the place, pandemics, a depression or recession, if that's
what you want to call it in fancy terms whatever.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
I was like, Oh, I hope those things ever happen,
and my parents will be like, that's never gonna happen
to you. Don't worry.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
People aren't gonna let these things take flight and here.
We are just fucking flying through it.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
It's crazy.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
But it's funny that we're talking about all this because
our episode today.
Speaker 2 (04:11):
Is about happiness. Oh yes, feeling good? No, yeah, sure, no.
Speaker 3 (04:18):
It's very hard to be happy right.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Now, it is.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
But you know what, I am stubborn and I just
refuse to let people snatch my joy. Like there's so
much that we can still be happy about on this planet.
We have good lives, we have healthy families, we have,
you know, a lot of good stuff going for us.
We're in careers that we like, knock on wood, We're pretty.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Healthy at the moment.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
You know, none of those things stay, and I think
even the bad times they don't say. That is why
I have tattooed across my heart.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
This too shall pass, because on.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Your best days and your worst days, it's not gonna
be there forever. So just feel it at that moment.
And right now we're really feeling some shit, So let's
talk about happiness. Sure recorded this episode to be completely honest,
and I know what my happiness score was, and I
was thinking I was a little delusional. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
I think I'm gonna keep it.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
You're crazy, Yeah, get to Okay. His name is Layton Campbell.
Fun fact about Layton, I actually grew up with his
little brothers, the middle There are five kids in the family,
and I grew up with his middle brother and then
met his second to youngest brother when I was in college,
and then I met him, So I've known them like
(05:29):
the family for a very long time. And he wrote
a book about being happy and I think all of
us could use that some Moreland honors.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
So here's Layton.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
All right, I am here with Layton Campbell. High Layton,
who it's It's you just called me Mata, which is
very funny because obviously I've known you for a very
long time.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
Because now when I.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
Meet people specifically through work, they all call me by
my last name, which is Gandhi. And then when anyone
drops that, people say, who's up?
Speaker 4 (05:59):
Who's his person? I'm an insider.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
You are an insider. So I have you here for
a lot of reasons. One, you came to town and
you've had a good time.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
Right, amazing you saw Othello.
Speaker 4 (06:08):
It was absolutely amazing. People need to go see it.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Really. Yeah, what was so great about it?
Speaker 4 (06:14):
Well, first of all, I love Denzel okay, and he
was awesome. And I went to see Denzel, but Jake
Jenlellen Hall. I probably didn't pronounce that right. Did he
stole the show?
Speaker 1 (06:25):
Really?
Speaker 4 (06:26):
He was absolutely fabulous. Go for Denzel, fall in love
with Jake?
Speaker 1 (06:31):
What a good review? Did you guys pay ten thousand
dollars for these tickets because we heard they were through
the roof crazy?
Speaker 4 (06:36):
We got a discount nine thousand.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
Oh wow, thank god, glad you did that.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
This New York crisis. It's amazing.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
All right.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
So I have you here for a specific reason because
you have been talking about something, writing about something, and
researching a little bit something that is really close to
my heart and all of our hearts, which is happiness,
something Diamond could find a little more of at some
point that was actually a pretty happy person, I think.
But you have a book, the Happiness Equation, where you
talk about the things that make us happy. There's a
(07:05):
test you can take, by the way, if you go
to your happiness eq dot com.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
Correct, you can take the test.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
It's seven questions and based on the answers to those
seven questions, you are going to get a score.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
And then you can start doing the.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Work on yourself to figure out why is my score
what it is?
Speaker 2 (07:18):
And here's where I'm nervous.
Speaker 4 (07:20):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
I took the tests. First time I took it, I
swear I got a ninety seven.
Speaker 4 (07:24):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
I was talking to your brother about it. He's like,
I don't think anyone's ever gotten a ninety seven. Hi,
you take it again.
Speaker 2 (07:31):
So I took it again that time I got a
ninety five.
Speaker 4 (07:33):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
I may be delusional about my answers.
Speaker 4 (07:37):
Maybe not. I mean from an outsider's view, you know,
I think you're doing in terms of the quiz and
the questions and all that, I can see why you
would score high in a lot of these categories. That's nice.
It's up to you to determine, like how you show
up in different areas. But you saying that you have
a high score is not surprising to me.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
Okay. So Diamond, will you come over to this mic
first second, because I want us both to answer these
questions together. Okay, So give.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
Us the questions and I think we'll both tell you
where we fell on this.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Okay, So the first.
Speaker 4 (08:10):
One, first one is are your basic human needs being met?
Speaker 1 (08:12):
Yes?
Speaker 4 (08:13):
Okay. Second one, do you belong to any groups that
meet regularly and are meaningful to you.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
Yes, yes, I guess she started to say no, but
then I told her that you said this show could
be a meaningful group, and she went back and said yes, sure.
Speaker 4 (08:26):
And also her context for your listeners and viewers, it's
your family can be that group also, Okay, you know.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
So, yes, she's very close with her family one hundred percent.
Speaker 4 (08:35):
The idea is where I'm trying to identify people who
wake up, go to work, come home, they say hi,
and buy to people, but they have no meaningful connections
with other people. Those are the people that really I'd
like to shake them out of that potentially and have
them go and connect with other people.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Okay, So that's kind of getting harder and harder though now,
because as much as we have more technology, it's actually
disconnecting people more than connecting people, because you feel like
you're talking. I'm guilty of this. I feel like I'm
talking to people. Oh yeah, I know what so and
so is doing. I don't know if I've actually talked
to that person in months, but I see what they're
doing on Instagram and I think, yep, I know what's
(09:11):
going on in your life.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
No, I don't. I know what I put on Instagram,
people think they know what's going on in my life.
No it's not.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Yeah, it's you know, we only put the best stuff
on there, so that connection seems to be really disconnected anymore.
Speaker 4 (09:22):
Yeah, So I talk about that in the book. Technology
is not going anywhere. It makes no sense to even
try and do that.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
I'm like, unplug it, find it, and unplug.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
It wherever it is if you can.
Speaker 4 (09:31):
If that is for your life, sure, one hundred percent.
But trying to make a societal move where we're gonna
like get off of social media not happening. It's not
going anywhere. So I think online friends, chat groups, social media,
all that stuff has its place and can be awesome.
And not trying to tell anybody to go away from it.
But what I am encouraging people, and it's in the
book also, is you need to go and have a
(09:53):
group of people that you physically meet with in person,
that you hug, handshake, icon tech, the whole human thing,
the way we were designed to be like communal creatures.
You have to scratch that itch, and technology is not
going to do it. So I'm not trying to replace
technology tell people to stop. I'm just telling them you
need to add the component of having a physical group
(10:15):
of people that you meet.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
With, because vibrations are real and you feed off of
each other and you need a human connection. I know
when we stayed home during COVID, we actually broadcast from
home for like a.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
Year and a half.
Speaker 4 (10:25):
Oh wow, it was forever.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
I know you're from Florida, so there was like novid
down there. I just kept going normally.
Speaker 4 (10:31):
What was going on?
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Yeah, my parents are in Tampa, and they're like, no,
everyone's fine. People's faces. So it really changed for us,
and I realized how much I disliked working remotely in
this specific job and how important these weirdos really are
to me in my life.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
Diamond is one of my.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
Favorite people who I actually between every break on the air,
I go into her studio and sit with her and
we just like talk about other stuff that has nothing
to do with what's going on in here, and I
don't know what I do, No, I do know what
I would do without that, And it was terrible.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
I hated it.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
I loved it.
Speaker 2 (11:07):
Diamond is one step away from being a female insel.
Speaker 1 (11:13):
That hurts. That hurts no, but she's very happy. She's
very content being at home watching her shows, hanging out
with her family, and that's it. She doesn't care much
about the rest of it.
Speaker 3 (11:24):
The thing that I think I have that maybe a
lot of people don't have is I live in the
house with multip like my entire family.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
So you love yeah, you actually like them.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
I'm in the house with people all day.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
I loved it.
Speaker 3 (11:35):
Yeah, we were in your room now, mom like things
like that.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
Yeah, that's right, So that's good. So one of the
things that Diamond and I were actually talking about today
speaking of social media and human connection. And you have kids,
So how old is your oldest child? Eighteen, so you
definitely will know about this. You've noticed such a rise
for years at this point of people being sad and
instead of taking it to friends, they take it to
(12:01):
social media and they are crying and they pick up
a camera and they start to record themselves and then
they post that online for other people that they have
no connection with, and they do not know to come
and leave them comments that could be good comments or
they could be terrible comments. What is this about and
how do you think that impacts happiness?
Speaker 4 (12:19):
Okay, can't speak to this from personal experience because in
our household, the rule is no social media until you're
a senior in high school. And when you're a senior
in high school, you have no rules, no curfew, You
can come and go, you do whatever you want. And
the idea is you're about to go to college anyway,
or you're going about to start your life, whatever's next
for you, So we want to you to have a
(12:40):
training wheels year where you can do whatever you want
because we're right around the corner from us not even
really having any control of your life anyway. So that
was our rule. So we never experienced that with my son,
and we have you know, three others that are coming
right behind them, and it worked so far. You know,
we'll see where it goes. But I don't know what
that's like like because my kids haven't done it. And
(13:02):
then when we released him to the wild, he's like, uh,
I don't even really want to be on it that much.
He's on it now and he has like he's one
of those people. He follows people, but he has no
posts that's like his vibe unless there is a hidden
burner account that he's crying and spilling his guts and
(13:24):
how I'm a bad father. And all that we have
a great relationship, but it's possible he's got a secret account.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
One of the things that you talked about was dopamine
and sort of instant gratification. And I think because Diamond
was saying, this phenomenon of people crying in the phone
and like posting it all the time is becoming normal
to people.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
That's a very normal thing.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
Like it's the last thing I would ever think of that.
I'm sad and I'm crying, my face is puffy and
there's like SnO coming out of my nose, and I
pick up a camera like this is me, guys, let's
talk about it. I don't want people to see that.
But she's saying it's becoming normal, and in my head,
I just think there's nothing normal about that. Normal is
connecting with human not connecting with a bunch of strangers who,
let's be honest, have of them.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
We're gonna shit on you for this. What are you doing?
Speaker 3 (14:05):
Yeah, I think I look at my little cousins. It's
not normal for us, right because we grew up without
social media and crying online would get you clowned by everyone.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Now it's like, okay, we.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
Have to take care of people's feelings and be more
sensitive with them so they feel like at least my
little cousins, they have pictures of them crying, like they
pick up the phone cry take a picture, So send
it to our chat. Our group chat is literally called
real tears because we make fun of them. And so
now they're like, Okay, we're not gonna post it online,
but we're gonna send it to you guys. But they
(14:35):
think it's normal. I'm like, this is a little nuts.
Speaker 4 (14:38):
Yeah, I think it's that may be one of those dopamine,
you know, hit type of things, because you put that
out there and now you're getting comments, you're getting likes,
you get into the people who sympathize with you, which
is one level of probably dopamine. Then you get the
haters and the trolls. That's probably even you're getting something
out of that as well too. It's negative, but it's
(15:01):
like I'm getting interaction. It's like the one of the
worst things for a post, and I've done this. I
think everybody's done it. At some point. You make the
best post in the world and literally nobody cares.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
I got shadow Band because apparently Instagram flagged me as
a pedophile for some reason. And I'm not kidding baby
in hot, you're not only allowed to use those terms together.
Speaker 4 (15:20):
Okay, hot problematic.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
Yeah, it's a constant problem over here. Do you take
it down or you just leave it?
Speaker 4 (15:26):
I leave it. I leave everything up. I open booked.
It's like, it is what it is, it's who I am.
Take her or leave it.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
Because it doesn't give you a sense of worth.
Speaker 1 (15:35):
Or value, not at all.
Speaker 4 (15:37):
It's trying to, you know, help people. Okay, So I
have personal stuff, I have business stuff, I have book stuff.
So I wear a bunch of hats and I just
put it out there. And it's like, if people love it, cool,
If they don't love it, that's cool too.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
It's good that your kids don't have social media then,
because I was going to ask you if they ever
come like, duh, dude, take that down.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
That's so cringey.
Speaker 4 (16:06):
Oh. I run pretty much every post by them, Oh
do you? Oh yeah? And they hate most of it.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
So why do you run it by them?
Speaker 4 (16:12):
Just so they could be like this is you want
to make sure I'm being consistent.
Speaker 1 (16:16):
Fair enough? So okay, this is a yes or no.
Fame is the most deadly drug known to man. I
used to think it was fentanyl, but I'm starting to fame.
Speaker 4 (16:26):
It begins a letter F for sure, one of those.
I could see how that would be problematic, but I
would probably think fame is like money. It doesn't really
change you. It just amplifies a person that you are.
Because I know people who are famous, and they're some
of the coolest people on the planet.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
Name them who.
Speaker 4 (16:43):
I won't name them, damn it.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
Nobody ever falls for that one.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
Go ahead, name it.
Speaker 4 (16:48):
No, I'm not going to say, Okay, yeah, I know
people who have a bunch of money and some of
them are awesome. And then I know the reverse for
for that as well too. They have a bunch of
money and they're really not good people, and they're I think,
for the right person. If you're grounded and you're just
aware that, Okay, I am stepping into something that could
be problematic. If I don't do it right, you're gonna
(17:09):
be fine.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
I think I would get drunk with power. I say
that in my head, but I actually don't know what
would operate any differently, except maybe sometimes I want to
smack a phone out of somebody's stands, And I think
if I had enough money and I had like a
phone slap fund. That's what I would do with it.
Speaker 2 (17:23):
But I'm talking to you. Pay attention to me.
Speaker 1 (17:27):
Diamond actually posed a question to us not too long
ago about well you ask your question.
Speaker 3 (17:33):
Okay, I get long winded, so to be bored.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
We were.
Speaker 3 (17:38):
I don't remember how it came up, but I was
talking to I think it started with Danielle and I
was like, we live a life where we have access
to If we don't have the access ourselves to a
lot of money and experiences, we're very close to.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
People who do have that, right does that? So?
Speaker 3 (17:57):
Would you rather live a life where you know that
access that you have and could have? Like you could
have a lot of money, you see it right there,
but you complain about the random little things, like everyday
things that really don't matter because you like it's like
your life is great.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
You pick little crappy.
Speaker 3 (18:12):
Things to complain about, sure, or would you rather live
like a lot of people in this country who may
not they may be making like minimum wage, and they
find a way to make it happen for themselves because
they think that this is all that life is, and
they're really happy because they don't care about the things
that they don't know are out there for them. Sure, sure,
(18:33):
which one do you think you'd rather?
Speaker 4 (18:35):
I think there are mutually exclusive, Like, it doesn't have
to be one or the other. It's it's happiness and
it's it's going to be different for everybody. And if
you look at our logos and so on, it's half
of a happy face because there's some basic principles, but
you have to figure out the rest, you know. So,
if you're finding happiness working minimum wage, living wherever you live,
(18:59):
and you have happiness and however you're doing it, awesome.
If you have happiness and you either have a bunch
of money or you have access to a bunch of money, awesome.
Now if you don't have happiness and you're in either
of those scenarios, that's where the issues come into play.
So I don't think having one or the other is
really the answer. It's not the answer at all. That's
kind of a recurring pattern that you see with like
(19:24):
high level athletes, like once I win the Super Bowl,
I'm going to be happy. Once I get the gold medal,
I'm going to be happy, and then they get it
and they're very depressed for a lot of them. So
if you think, Okay, I'm making minimum wage or whatever,
and if you're making minimum wage and you can do better,
you should if you want to, and you should. I'm
not telling anybody to stay there or whatever. But if
(19:46):
you think getting that particular job, getting a yacht or
whatever is going to make you happy, you may be
really surprised that you actually get it, and you become
sad because it's not about the It's about the other things.
Your connection to people. You know, how grateful you are
(20:07):
for the things you do have. Those are the things
that are important.
Speaker 1 (20:09):
So we were talking about this lighton and I before
he actually came into the room to do this, about
money and happiness. What is that actual correlation there, because
there were research studies done that say at about seventy
five thousand dollars a year is when people are the
most happy, and that's of course the national average. In
New York you would be poor, so you wouldn't be
happy in New York with that, but other places across
the country seventy five thousand dollars a year and you're
(20:31):
happy because you can take care of most of the
things that you need to take care of. But you're
also not at that point where you're now surrounded by
maybe billionaires, if you're a millionaire and realizing, Wow, there's
so much more that I don't have. But at the
same time, when people say money can't buy you happiness,
it is kind of a croc which Layton is saying
he's seen some more recent research that hasn't really been
(20:52):
vetted all the way but that say, no, there's a
direct correlation between money and happiness.
Speaker 4 (20:56):
Okay, So I saw this literally yesterday and they say
that there is no courtly like above seventy five thousand.
If you make more money, you will continue to be happier.
O dout know that to be true?
Speaker 2 (21:08):
Wait, so you will continue to be happier, Yes, as
you make more money.
Speaker 4 (21:10):
As you make more money, that's true.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
I think so, I think it's true. What I do
think it has a cap.
Speaker 1 (21:16):
So money can't buy you happiness, which is what we
were talking about specifically. It can't buy you happiness, but
it can buy you a lot of the things to
make you happy, like freedom and time, quality time with
your family, good doctors to take care of your health
if you're struggling, the ability to pay your medical bills,
if you have a problem, it can take you there,
I would say, And I have nothing to go on
except my own brain at this point. With this thought,
(21:37):
getting into the millions is probably going to be great.
I don't know that it makes a difference between a
million and a billion, but I also think that a
lot of people who get to millionaire status then just
start to feel as though, Wow, now there's so much more,
and they keep chasing it, sort of to your point,
like the professional athletes, Okay, I got a gold medal, Well,
now I want another one?
Speaker 2 (21:55):
Or do I want another one? This thing hasn't made
me happy. I think to get to.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
A point where you've made billions of dollars, you have
to just be unhappy because you're continuing to chase something.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
My own thought. I don't know any billionaires.
Speaker 4 (22:07):
They're probably really happy billionaires.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
I don't know they seem to Eli almost does not
seem like a heavy person. He kind of seems like
a little turd. They all seem like they were This
is going to be a very antiquated statement, I know it,
but they just seem like they were big dorks who
now have this chip on their shoulder to prove to
the world the unknown, A dork on the richest maleive,
but you're still being dorky about things.
Speaker 4 (22:26):
One thing you mentioned that I think is kind of
important is like, I don't think any amount of money
can make you happy. I think it can contribute to
things that can add to your happiness. And I specifically
talk about this in the book as well too, because
I give people like a toolkit of things to protect
your happiness, and one of the things is be as
financially strong as you can be. It's going to be
(22:48):
different for everybody, but you want to basically have the
things that you need to cover your basic human needs
and emergencies that arise, because without that, I could be problematic.
Speaker 1 (23:01):
And that was all of our thoughts on question two.
So what's the third question in the Happiness The.
Speaker 4 (23:06):
Third question is on an A plus to F scale,
what is the value that you bring to the groups
that you belong to?
Speaker 1 (23:12):
What do you think?
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Diamond?
Speaker 3 (23:13):
I said, C.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
You think you're C.
Speaker 3 (23:15):
I don't know, you know? And I also think it
varies depending on the day, right, Like sometimes I walk
in and I'm like, hey, you know, I'm trying to
give people energy, and sometimes I don't even have the
energy to give. So I'm like, you know whatever, So
I think it balances out.
Speaker 2 (23:30):
So I said, C see that is a balanced answer.
I gave myself an A.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
I was like, I am contributing. I am happy, I'm
coming in here and doing what I need to do.
And I actually wasn't even just specifically thinking about this show.
As the group, we do some volunteer stuff on the
side that actually it makes me really.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
Happy to do it.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
And I'm not sure when I answer that question if
I gave it enough thought of what am I contributing
to the group versus what is that group giving me back?
Because I really like it and I get a lot
out of it, but they are fun. And I mean
even here DuMond, I wouldn't give you a C yesterday.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
He works like twenty.
Speaker 1 (24:03):
Four hours, and I know that just hours isn't enough.
But what you contributed is a lot in that one day,
and you do that every day.
Speaker 4 (24:10):
How does that make you feel? Diamond? When she says
it doesn't somebody sees it.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Everybody sees it. They just don't say it to you
because then they have to pay more save it for
the aircheck. Yeah, I told you that's how you have to.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
Negotiate, taking it right down the hall, take it, take
it to.
Speaker 1 (24:28):
Her, and let me know how it goes, all right.
Speaker 4 (24:30):
The fourth question fourth question is on an A plus
to F scale. How would you rate your gratitude?
Speaker 2 (24:36):
I am. I would give myself an A.
Speaker 1 (24:38):
Again. Every day I think about I literally wake up
in the morning, I look out my window and I think.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Wow, this is where I live.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
This is crazy, what an amazing city. I feel like
I worked hard to get to something that I always wanted,
and now that I have it, I appreciate it every day.
I appreciate my health. I appreciate my family's health. I
appreciate the health of my friends. That's the biggest one.
I just I think there's so much to be happy for.
And when I go to sleep at night, I don't
say prayers. I'm not really asking for anything.
Speaker 2 (25:06):
But every night I do go through the list of
the things for which I'm grateful, and it makes me happy.
Speaker 4 (25:11):
Because my mother doesn't it.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
There's a lot.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
Today it does make me happy.
Speaker 1 (25:14):
Diamond A, I agree grateful. Yesterday she was talking about
she's just happy to be alive. Yeah, you know what
I mean.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
There are a lot of people like, who I know
a lot of people like grown up in Brooklyn that
aren't with me now that we were like in high school,
and stuff like that. Things happen to people, things happen
to our family members and stuff like that. I'm happy
that my body is healthy. It may not look the
way that I wanted to, but it gets me to
where I need to be every day, you know, so
I'm happy about it.
Speaker 1 (25:41):
Can't really complain.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
I found all that cheers.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
Wait, and you haven't answered your scores on these things,
So start with the first one.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
Basically of being met. Yes, okay, I belong to several
groups that are extremely meaningful to me. For sure. The
value that I bring to those groups, I would say
is about an A.
Speaker 1 (25:58):
Okay.
Speaker 4 (25:58):
Also my gratitude, I would say, I'm like in a
plus territory. That's great because I, first of all, talking
about this stuff all the time just makes it like
I'm preaching to myself. And even I've been in a
couple of months recently, but I've been working on my audiobook,
which is not released to the public yet. But I'm
like talking to myself through my own things that are
(26:21):
going on pretty well. And then the next question I'll
put up to you, and I'll give you my answer
as well, is when a meaningful situation does not go
as expected, negative impact on your emotions lasts three options.
Short time, modern time, long time.
Speaker 1 (26:37):
So before I answer this question, which again I may
have answered in delusion, when you say something meaningful, give
me an example of something meaningful that could go the
wrong way.
Speaker 4 (26:47):
I'm not necessarily talking about like the most tragic things
in life, sure, because that clearly is an another.
Speaker 2 (26:54):
Category, right like when my boyfriend died.
Speaker 4 (26:56):
Not yeah, yeah, so the I'm also not talking about
like super trivial things either, right, meaningful, meaningful. So it
would be like, just off the top of my head,
you not getting into a school that you applied for,
you not getting a grant, you not landing a client
(27:16):
that you were trying to land, or something like that.
Something at work doesn't pan out, Okay.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
So at this point in my life, I would say
I focus on that stuff for a short amount of time.
I think it's taken a long time to get there,
because you realize as you grow up the things you
thought were so serious really weren't that serious. And if
you believe in fate that this is exactly where I'm
supposed to be. So all of these things that didn't
work out got me to where I am, and I'm
supposed to be here, so I don't That's not a
(27:43):
huge thing for me when I don't get my way.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
Well, you, I think the answer was moderate because I'm
still working on that. I'm an overthinker, so if there's
something that goes wrong in my life, I always like,
I rethink what I could have done differently on my part.
Even if the answer is nothing, I still think about it.
But I'm starting to get to the point where I'm like, well,
(28:06):
things happen for a reason.
Speaker 1 (28:07):
It is what it is.
Speaker 3 (28:08):
So we're working our way to short term but I
don't know the overthinker in me, I may never get there.
I'm like, oh my god, I'm thinking about things that
happened in junior high school.
Speaker 4 (28:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:17):
So I got nominated for this award that I've won
a couple times before and I didn't win it this year,
and I got the email and everybody was very apologetic
and weird about it, and I was like, why do
you guys care so much? I'm sure whoever won this
probably deserved it. We'll move on but then I felt
like people were pitying me, and that made me feel weird, like, oh,
we can rebuild for next year. I'm like, I don't care.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
I nominate myself. It's fine what you win.
Speaker 3 (28:38):
So often that they're probably like, give this girl a break.
Speaker 1 (28:41):
Whatever it is. It didn't bother me as much as
seemed to bother other people. And then that made me
take a step back and think.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
Wait, should I be bothered by this?
Speaker 4 (28:48):
You shouldn't be.
Speaker 1 (28:48):
I'm not.
Speaker 4 (28:49):
I let it go as quickly as you can let that.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
Yeah, and be happy for whoever it is. I got
that because I'm sure they really did deserve it and
don't have to go figure out who this person was.
But yeah, I'm sure it was great. Yeah, what about you?
Speaker 4 (28:59):
Like, I'm in the moderate category, really trying to get
too short. One of the things, so a couple things
that I have been doing lately, and this is not
in the book, but it's just the whole idea is
you answer the questions, you see what pings you, and
then you start to work on it. So one of
the things that I tell myself is that I have
to process everything before I can let it go. But
(29:20):
now I stop telling myself that I don't have to
process things. I just let it go. Yes, you know,
like you said, Now, I'm saying this because I'm you.
I'm essentially you. Is like, just let it go. Like
it's hard to do it, but sometimes I can do
it. It's like, you know, I don't need to actually process this,
I'm just let it go. I try and identify as
(29:42):
quickly as possible that I'm holding onto something. Once I realize, oh,
you're holding onto that, then kind of light bulbs go
off in my brain and I'm like, well, why am
I holding onto this? Now I can start doing something
about it, because you can't change anything unless you become
aware of it. And now I am trying to become
aware as quickly as possible that I'm holding onto something.
(30:03):
And then I'm also giving myself the grace that I
don't have to let it go right away, although that
I want to. And that's kind of where I'm at
on that.
Speaker 2 (30:10):
All right, what's the next question?
Speaker 4 (30:21):
So do you believe your life has a purpose?
Speaker 2 (30:23):
I think it does. I don't know what that purpose is.
Does that matter?
Speaker 4 (30:26):
No?
Speaker 1 (30:27):
Because I think there is a purpose, I'm just not
sure that I know what it is yet same.
Speaker 3 (30:32):
I think I said it out loud when I was
doing it. I'm like, I do, but I don't know
what it is yet. So we'll get there. But you know, yeah,
I wouldn't say no. I think everybody's life has a purpose.
Speaker 4 (30:41):
I think everyone's life has a purpose.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
Do you know what your purpose is?
Speaker 4 (30:44):
I do?
Speaker 1 (30:44):
What is your purpose? Or if you're comfortable sharing, If
you're not.
Speaker 4 (30:47):
You don't have I'm not comfortable, no open book. So
I think I was put on this earth to be
a good husband and a good father. Okay, pretty basic,
nothing like earth shattering. But and if you read the book,
you'll hear some of the backstory of my life and
the backstory of my father and how he, you know,
was in our family, which was not good. So part
(31:07):
of that is trying to undo some of the generational
things that have happened in my family. And because I
know my purpose, and I've known it for a very
very long time, since I was a teen, you can
trace everything that I do, the good things. When I'm
at my best, I'm moving towards my purpose. Oh you know,
so even this book, me being here right now all
(31:30):
like everything good that I've ever done in life you
can trace it back to that, which.
Speaker 2 (31:33):
Would bring us to the seventh question, which is on
an A.
Speaker 4 (31:36):
Plus to f scale. How would you rate your progress
to achieving your purpose in life? So, not knowing your purposes,
it would be hard to answer that question I talk about.
Speaker 2 (31:45):
I think I gave myself an eight.
Speaker 1 (31:49):
I don't know what purposes, but yeah, I'm moving in
the right direction.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
To go and retool this now that I'm thinking about
it a little bit more.
Speaker 4 (31:57):
You should try and find out figure out what your
purpose is is in life. But if you don't know,
you should just move in a general direction.
Speaker 2 (32:05):
That's positive Diamond. What do you think you're on the
path to fulfilling your purpose?
Speaker 3 (32:09):
See, because I really didn't know. I don't know what
my purpose is yet, but I would hope that I'm
moving in the right direction. You know, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (32:20):
So sometimes when I think about purpose, I don't know
about the bigger, heavier things. But I think about what
my mom always said, which is what I have tried
to do.
Speaker 2 (32:28):
With my life.
Speaker 1 (32:28):
And I don't know if it's necessarily a purpose, but
it is leave the room better than when you entered.
Metaphorically and literally actually come into a room, if the
chairs are pushed out, push back in.
Speaker 2 (32:38):
And I would like to think that with what.
Speaker 1 (32:40):
We do, sometimes you are leaving the room, that metaphorical
room a little bit better, if it's spreading laughter, if
it's giving people an outlet to talk about something to
a stranger that they didn't want to before. So if
I were to make that my purpose, and then I
would say I'm fulfilling my purpose. I give myself an
a which again could be delusion because I just created it.
I fulfilled it.
Speaker 3 (33:03):
Great.
Speaker 4 (33:04):
Your purpose in life doesn't have to be like care
and cancer. It can and for some people though that
if you're that person, like that's awesome. Leaving the room
better than you found. It could be someone's purpose in
life because if you go through life with that mindset,
like you're setting people up for success, having people enter
a space a literal and a metaphorical space where they're
(33:27):
going to be able to shine and operate at the
highest capacity. So that could be huge, Like you could
be teeing up someone who then goes to cure cancer
because of a space that you left that they entered.
Speaker 1 (33:38):
Yes, I am creating the people who cure cancer. That
is what I'm gonna go.
Speaker 4 (33:42):
Yeah, new tagline, tagline.
Speaker 2 (33:45):
It's all because of us. This is amazing.
Speaker 1 (33:47):
Okay, So this is the question that I wanted to
ask you about like purpose and this entire thing, and
it's a little personal, so you don't have to answer
obviously if you don't want to. Sure, are you in
therapy or have you been to therapy?
Speaker 4 (33:56):
I have been to therapy in the past. I'm not
currently in therapy therapy, but I have like therapy like
stuff lined up shortly, Okay.
Speaker 1 (34:05):
Because I was going to say, we have conversations about
this all the time. How important do you feel therapy
is to self discovery?
Speaker 4 (34:12):
Okay? Therapy is kind of complicated for me because I've
had bad therapists and I've had therapists who give really
bad advice, So that is very harmful. If you can
get a good therapist, that is like gold. But if
you have a bad therapist, and it's really hard to
know if you have a bad therapist, because a good
therapist is probably going to challenge you and the conversations
(34:34):
are going to be difficult. I don't know how to
tell people if they have a good one or not.
But I know that having a good one is great
and having a bad one is really bad.
Speaker 1 (34:42):
That's fair. I mean the same as we would say
with any doctor. You have to find a right fit,
somebody that actually makes you feel like you're being heard,
you're being seen, you're being listened to.
Speaker 2 (34:50):
All of that's important.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
Diamond will tell you the most selfish person that you've
ever met in your life is somewhere in a therapist's
office being told that they need to be more selfish. Absolutely,
She's like, it has ruined everybody.
Speaker 3 (35:00):
Yeah, it has. I'm terrified to go to therapy just
because I'm scared that I'm gonna have a bad therapist
and think that they're amazing and walk through life hurting
people because I need to be selfish. I need to
put myself first. And I'm like, it's not fair.
Speaker 4 (35:18):
I would Who am I? What do I know? If
being selfish is something that pings you for like a therapist,
not being aligned with your values, being selfless is a
good thing to a degree. You can take anything like
too far. But if you go into a therapist's office
and they're like it's all about you, probably time for
a U turn.
Speaker 1 (35:37):
So of the seven different questions, if you had to
isolate one of them as the start here to find
a little more happiness in your life, or at least
identify the things that you think are missing.
Speaker 2 (35:49):
Which question is it.
Speaker 4 (35:51):
Do you belong to meaningful groups that meet regularly? Yeah,
we talked about this a little bit. But online interactions,
friendships and so on, they have their place, but they're
not supposed to replace physical meeting and being physically in
the same place as people. We are communal creatures. It's
just a fact you need to be around other people.
(36:12):
That's where I would start.
Speaker 1 (36:13):
All right. So if we want to find your book,
where are we going to find it?
Speaker 4 (36:16):
So you go to our website. It's your happiness eq
dot com. You can get your completely free happiness score.
You know, our social media links and all that are
in there.
Speaker 2 (36:26):
Too, And the happiness score is really easy to get to.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
It's not one of those things where you have to
put in your email address and then they send you
the information. You take those seven questions and you get
your answer back and you click on the little plus
button up at the top right corner. Some people were
looking for it, so that's where you get your happiness
score and you get the book. Can you also buy
it on Amazon. For sure you get more money though
if they go to your site.
Speaker 4 (36:45):
No, actually I don't. I'm sure you could. I'm not
really doing this for the money necessarily. But the link
on our site takes you to Amazon, so okay, yeah,
I don't fulfilled books. I don't have like a garage
full of books. You go to our website, you can
click on that link. You'll take you to Amazon. But
you could go anywhere that you buy books and our
book will be there.
Speaker 2 (37:02):
Awesome. And you're working on the audiobook, so we're looking
forward to hearing that. Is it you that's reading it?
Speaker 4 (37:07):
Sure is? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (37:07):
Well, congratulations on everything, and it's nice to see you
after so long.
Speaker 4 (37:11):
Yeah, it's been too long.
Speaker 2 (37:12):
Next time I come down to Miami because we're down
there all the time.
Speaker 4 (37:14):
Cool for work?
Speaker 2 (37:16):
All right, thanks Layton, thank you?
Speaker 1 (37:28):
All right, Diamond, after that conversation, did you feel anything
at all? I'm not saying you needed to feel happier,
but did you in any way feel like you had
things you could identify that make you happy or that
you want to work on.
Speaker 3 (37:40):
Yes, and no, I want to find my purpose, okay,
but I really don't feel like I have to like
search and dig and like do some like grand journey
to discover what my purpose is. I feel like it'll
come to me, like whatever. But I'm grateful. And that
was one of the things that I really liked about
his his questions, like are you grateful for the life
(38:03):
you have? And I'm like, yeah, I've always been grateful.
That's you know, some people aren't. And I guess that's
what makes you unhappy. That's sad.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
I think that.
Speaker 1 (38:10):
And I know that it's so easy to just blame
social media for the downfall of everything, but I do
think it's really tough to be happy if you're constantly
comparing yourself to other people in a world of everything
that's fake because how many people do you know that
you know in real life what they're like, and then
you see what they post online and you're like, girl,
please yeah, or sir please yeah, give me a break.
Speaker 3 (38:32):
Who are you exactly the person I know?
Speaker 2 (38:35):
Exactly?
Speaker 3 (38:35):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (38:35):
So I think social media taking a big step away
from it's probably really helpful. A study just came out
the other day that said women are more negatively impacted
by social media than men are because of the outside judgment,
because how many times do you see a picture of
a beautiful woman posted and these fucking trolls from the
depths of hell crawl out of their crypt to tell
(38:56):
her she's fat, or to.
Speaker 2 (38:58):
Say I wouldn't hit that. Sir, you haven't hit anything
in the last decade. You incel good day. Yeah, and
you know people don't do that to men.
Speaker 1 (39:07):
There are rarely times where a guy puts a picture
and girls slide in under there like fat. I wouldn't
hit that.
Speaker 2 (39:12):
Oh, I know.
Speaker 1 (39:13):
I turn about is fair play, but let me tell
you from someone who's done it a few times, you
will get flagged as a bully.
Speaker 2 (39:20):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (39:21):
So, you know, not the greatest, But in that one second,
it does feel good just to be like.
Speaker 4 (39:27):
You're insane and it makes me happy.
Speaker 2 (39:29):
And my happiness score is ninety five, so join me.
Speaker 3 (39:31):
Your happiness score is a part of your delusion. Okay,
you are not.
Speaker 1 (39:37):
There's no way, why why who do I have to
be sad about?
Speaker 3 (39:42):
You don't have anything to be sad about. But the
answers to your questions, I'm like, that's questionable.
Speaker 2 (39:48):
What is my contribution to groups around me?
Speaker 3 (39:50):
Hey?
Speaker 2 (39:50):
Plus to you? Yeah, but it is to me. This
is about me?
Speaker 1 (39:55):
How do I feel about these things? So if I
live in a land of delusion, but I'm happy my land.
Speaker 4 (40:00):
Baby God, she's crazy.
Speaker 2 (40:02):
Welcome, send help. Who are you gonna send?
Speaker 4 (40:07):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (40:08):
Who's somebody that could.
Speaker 1 (40:09):
Like instantly make you unhappy?
Speaker 4 (40:14):
Doctor Oz?
Speaker 2 (40:17):
That was so random.
Speaker 1 (40:19):
All the people in the world.
Speaker 3 (40:21):
It's doctor, doctor Oz, doctor Phil. There are so many
more people. What's her name? From Fox? The Black Woman?
Candae Owans throw her on the list?
Speaker 2 (40:37):
Is like her.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
Name is like something hot.
Speaker 2 (40:41):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (40:42):
I could see her just face right now. Yep, Harris Faulkner, Yep, yep,
just just she makes me want to throw up. She's
a beautiful woman, but when she opens her damn mouth,
(41:02):
I'm like, you motherfucker.
Speaker 2 (41:04):
Like Stacy Dash Oh, she looks like a ghost. She
looks crazy as hell.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
She really did not like being black, and she tried
everything she could to change it.
Speaker 2 (41:13):
It's crazy. And on that note, happy happy Day.
Speaker 1 (41:16):
Everybody, go get the book Diamond. If people want to
find you online, where can they find you?
Speaker 3 (41:22):
At? Diamond? Sincere on Instagram? I'm kind of over Twitter,
so whatever.
Speaker 1 (41:27):
Yeah, it's a dark place at baby Hot Sauce on
Instagram and we'll see you next time. Say bye bye,
Host
Medha Gandhi
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