January 31, 2025 • 46 mins
Episode 359 - “Mental Health Experts” Feat: Ferrari Simmons & You Know BT Produced by: Baller Alert
Topics Include: Men’s Mental Health, Setting Boundaries, Law Enforcement, Generational Trauma, and More
The Baller Alert Show
Featuring @FerrariSimmonsMusic @youknowbt
":The Culture Deserves It"
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Twitter: @balleralert
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
They get a little called me broadcast live from Atlanta,
Georgia walks to the ball Aer show.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
I go by the name for I go by the name.
Speaker 1 (00:11):
You know, BT, introduce yourself, fellas.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
My name is Terrell Tepper. I'm a mental health therapist
here in Atlanta. And my name is Tawan Tepper. I'm
a mental health therapist here in Atlanta as well.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
Wether the Baller.
Speaker 4 (00:24):
All right, all right, all right, now, you guys said
something very important that I feel like people that look
like us be l like I ain't crazy.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Yeah, you are.
Speaker 4 (00:35):
A mental health therapist. Well, first of all, you guys
are twins. Yeah, Because I talked to one person he.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Was like, nah, you're supposed to me.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
I was like, okay, okay, yeah, we met up before.
But I think it's I think it gives us a
little bit of an advantage just because when you see twins,
you don't forget twins, you know what I mean.
Speaker 5 (01:01):
That's true. You might not.
Speaker 3 (01:02):
Love us, you might hate us, but you ain't gonna
forget about us. I think we get to double down
on ship, you know what I'm saying. So like, if
I say certain things or feel a certain way, it's
one thing if I feel that way, but I gotta
already got like a built in authorage.
Speaker 5 (01:18):
So it's cool.
Speaker 6 (01:19):
I always wanted a twin because I always wanted to
be like men. My men and my twin brother, we
could try to like date the same people.
Speaker 4 (01:28):
I got my best friends, my best friends or my
cousins their twin cousins.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
And my wife is a twin.
Speaker 4 (01:32):
Actually, oh wow, I don't know why I'm always surrounded
by twins. It's funny, but twins always not necessarily don't
do that, do you right? Yeah, never tried it either,
Like I never tried that, I got different tastes.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
I'm pretty sure I.
Speaker 5 (01:48):
Never tried it.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
I think we got the same tastes of like looks,
but a personality probably would be different.
Speaker 6 (01:55):
But I never tried to play jokes on people, Like
when you talking to somebody and then you're like, I'm
gonna send brother go like to see if this person
know the difference.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
I'm pretty sure that happens that no time.
Speaker 5 (02:05):
That's normal.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
I've seen that, So I think what happened initially the
first time we ever switched up my in fourth grade,
my teacher and his teacher was best friends. They was
like homies for Fool's Day, and it was like, get
your brother out of class, go to the bathroom and
switch clothes, and then you go to his class and
he come over here to my class.
Speaker 5 (02:27):
That shit happened, and.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
We was there all day, literally, and nobody knew, and
that's crazy.
Speaker 5 (02:33):
Today she pulled.
Speaker 3 (02:34):
Her homie to the side and was like, you know,
you had the wrong kid in your class the whole day,
and it was It was like a funny thing. But
I think typically people want us to do twin shit
more than we want to do twin shit.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Like dress alike.
Speaker 6 (02:51):
Did y'all parents make y'all do that? Like when y'all
kids like dress alike and stuff like that.
Speaker 3 (02:55):
It's so crazy. We dressed alike up until high school.
So then when we start like in our own personalities
and stuff. We got to school and somebody was like,
that's weird that y'all still dress like.
Speaker 5 (03:10):
We didn't. We didn't know it was weird.
Speaker 3 (03:12):
We thought it was regular, right, So at that point
we went home changed and never dressed it like again,
like it was. It was a little bit when we
got to high school, it got a little bit weird
that you didn't have your own personality, you know.
Speaker 6 (03:26):
So that was that was did y'all y'all parents, and
it was like, hey, y'all got so y'all been y'all
been having us dressed like that, and we in school
looking weird pretty much.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
It's almost like, you know, from the outside looking in,
it seems like fun and it is. You know what
I'm saying, It's ups and downs. But like when I
can tell you right now, if I go to the
gym right now, Oh, if I go to the gym
right now, hoop, They're gonna be like, damn, bro, where's
your brother? And it's like, damn, it's just me today.
(04:00):
It's got to be good enough for you, you know
what I'm saying. If that's not good enough for you,
that I don't know what to tell you. He a
grown man. I don't even know where he at.
Speaker 4 (04:06):
Growing up with twins in my life and now being
married to identical twins, I see twins stuff all the time.
Do you guys like sometimes just meet somewhere randomly and.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Have on the same ship always. Yeah, I have this
all the time.
Speaker 4 (04:19):
I've seen that with my cousins and then with my
wife and y'all have they would literally show up somewhere
and have on damn near the same outfit, same color way.
Speaker 5 (04:29):
So it's like we think so similar.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
So it's like, if I feel like this is appropriate
to wear to this occasion, he gonna be thinking something
very similar. Be Damn, I need a polo, I need
some gins, I need some air force one.
Speaker 5 (04:43):
So we show up. It might not be the exact same, but.
Speaker 4 (04:45):
It's last thing, last thing, because we got I don't
want to get off topic, because twins are cool to me.
You know twins triplets? Do you guys both have kids
or no? So do you know that their kids are
siblings because they have the same DNA. So my because
my wife's kids and my and her twin sisters kids
their siblings because they have the same mom DNA, so
(05:08):
they have they share their DNA. Their DNA is exactly
the same. That's why they look the same.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
So their kids are like cousin siblings.
Speaker 5 (05:16):
That's crazy.
Speaker 3 (05:18):
I never heard it that way, but I do know.
We have the exact same fingerprint too. No wait, what
our fingerprint is exact same?
Speaker 6 (05:25):
Sometimes he committed crime and his fingerprint They coming to
get you too.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
They're gonna bring both of them in the figure to
figure out who did it.
Speaker 4 (05:34):
Wow, But some twins aren't though, because my my cousin
twins are fraternal.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Yeah I never asked my wife was her and her
twin sisters praternal twins? They don't look the same, so twins,
they just look different.
Speaker 3 (05:47):
So facts, But fraternal twins are two eggs that got separated, separated.
Speaker 5 (05:53):
Fertilized by the same sperm.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
But identical twins is one egg and one sperm was
fertilized and then they split.
Speaker 5 (06:01):
Ye does it make sense?
Speaker 2 (06:03):
Yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 6 (06:04):
That's crazy whole thing, bro, But so hard fraternal twins
were they still born.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Like together the same day?
Speaker 2 (06:10):
They just that's crazy.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
Like, imagine me and you be twins.
Speaker 4 (06:14):
We just don't look the same, we just but we
were born the same day, We shared the same DNA,
everything else is the same.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
We just don't look the same. Then, boy, they got
boy and girl twin too.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Yeah, I do know, I do know that.
Speaker 5 (06:23):
I know some twins look like the daddy and like
the mom.
Speaker 3 (06:29):
That's usually look like like like brown skin.
Speaker 1 (06:34):
I think the boy girl twin dynamic is weird too, it.
Speaker 4 (06:38):
Could I'd be like, how does this happen? How's one
of the girl, one's a boy, and y'all twins? I
always thought that was weird. But anyway, all right, so can.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
I ask one last one last twin question.
Speaker 6 (06:50):
Isn't today and age like you can like if you
if you were having a kid and you wanted twins,
you could, like, yes.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
Scientifically, yeah, yeah, you can do this.
Speaker 4 (07:00):
It's expensive though, bro, stuff like if you want, like,
it's expensive to have wins period.
Speaker 1 (07:08):
Like some people can't have kids, so you have to
get the in vitro.
Speaker 4 (07:12):
Yeah, that's expensive, but I think that's like ten thousand
to start, just to start d Yeah.
Speaker 5 (07:20):
Yeah, I didn't know that, but I do.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
I do think that, like nowadays, everything is manipulatable, you
know what I'm saying, Like, you want something, you can
pretty much figure out.
Speaker 5 (07:32):
Ever you can pay for it.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Yeah, okay, my bad.
Speaker 4 (07:36):
I just had to ask because this is good, This
is good combo and we don't do interviews. We do
conversations when we when we do our content and stuff
like that.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
So is it now that you guys are twins?
Speaker 4 (07:48):
I kind of was going into this path of is
that the same thing that you wanted to do? The
mental health together.
Speaker 5 (07:55):
No, So I started in mental health.
Speaker 3 (07:58):
I got out establish my major in college psychology, and
he was actually physical therapy at Tennessee State.
Speaker 5 (08:07):
University of Tennessee State. Yes, sir, both of y'all. Okay,
that's a big deal, good deal.
Speaker 3 (08:15):
That's actually a funny story too. So I realized later
why as a football player they encourage you not to
declare a major up front, because once you declare a major,
you have to like make good grades to stay eligible
and you have to have a certain amount of credits
in that major. Yeah, so they was like, everybody that's
(08:38):
a freshman, don't declare a major.
Speaker 5 (08:40):
Just take core classes. You gotta do that.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
You gotta ta your core classes regardless.
Speaker 5 (08:44):
Yeah, you gotta get that out the way.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
They need y'all on the field.
Speaker 3 (08:46):
You're smarter, not bro like if you got economics.
Speaker 5 (08:51):
I don't think y'all. Everybody ain't smart out here.
Speaker 3 (08:56):
So let's just stay on the field and then we'll
figure the rest out later type situation. So I was like,
all right, in my mind, I was thinking, he gonna
do mental health, I'm gonna do physical health.
Speaker 5 (09:06):
We're gonna have a holistic health facility.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
At some point where you could and get you know,
get right from the mental space, get right from the
physical space. You got some injuries you need to recover from,
you know, whatever it is. And then my major, physical
health got lost its accreditation like like halfway through my
freshman year, and they was like, just keep on taking
(09:30):
courses and then switch your major before you graduate. I'm
glad I didn't do that because that major never did
get accredited.
Speaker 5 (09:37):
While I was at school.
Speaker 3 (09:38):
Would have more classes, yeah, I would have been a
super super senior.
Speaker 5 (09:44):
Transfer to another school, yeah, either one.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
So you switched to mental health.
Speaker 3 (09:48):
I switched to mental health, and I think it might
have been sophomore year where all of my credits got
transferred over.
Speaker 5 (09:59):
Which it was like a blessing. I didn't think that
was gonna happen.
Speaker 3 (10:03):
So I was like, damn, I'm gonna be behind because
I didn't choose a major when I should have.
Speaker 5 (10:08):
But it worked out, so it was good.
Speaker 1 (10:09):
All right. Now we got all that out of the way.
Liz get into the meat and potatoes.
Speaker 5 (10:14):
Pause.
Speaker 4 (10:17):
Why is it important for men? And I'll get into
the women, but why is it important for men to
explore their mental health and expand upon it?
Speaker 3 (10:30):
I feel like it's important for men to explore their
mental health just because we don't do that, you know
what I'm saying, Like we don't even why why because
at the end of the day, like we have to
be so much for so many people, you know what
I'm saying, Like we as men, normally were the head
of the household. Normally we are leaders in the workspace,
(10:53):
So if we don't take care of our mental space,
then it trickles down to so many other people. Also
feel like when you're the leader, it's a lot of
unspoken pressure for you to always have it together or
seem like you always have it together, and when you
are seeking help outside of yourself, it feels sometimes like
(11:16):
you don't have it together. Like I can't control this
without you know, somebody helping me control this. So I
don't want everybody else to see me as weak or
see me as flawed, or see me as you know,
whatever it is that don't.
Speaker 5 (11:30):
Really feel like a good leader, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
So I think most of the time, as men, especially
black men, we are kind of results driven, Like people
don't really care why you didn't get it done, you
know what I'm saying, It's just either you got that
shit done or you didn't get that shit done.
Speaker 5 (11:46):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (11:47):
If you didn't get it done, we gonna find somebody
else who's gonna.
Speaker 5 (11:49):
Get it done. To your point, I feel like that
we just live in a.
Speaker 3 (11:54):
No excuse society as men, you know what I mean.
Like we can't really say I made am mistake and
it's cool, you know what I mean. It's always consequences
attached to those mistakes. So the better headspace we in,
the more intentional we are about our mental the better
we can lead.
Speaker 4 (12:12):
I know BT has a question last one. I see
other ethnicities put mental health very important in their framework
of who they are. How Come there's a lack of
that and at the African American community, I gotta from
what I see right, correct me if I'm wrong.
Speaker 5 (12:31):
I can tell you no, No, you can completely right.
Speaker 3 (12:33):
As a matter of fact, I go to it like
a snooty gym a little bit, and the white guys
will sit up and brag about what their therapists recommended
that they do. You know what I'm saying. It's like
a status thing for them. But I think in our community,
for one, thing is generational curses. I think that most
of the stuff that the other cultures do, like cater
(12:55):
to their men, we don't do it.
Speaker 5 (12:57):
You know what I'm saying, Like.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
Pay attention to your mental health, we don't do it.
I think a lot of the things that we don't
do was kind of giving to us as a weakness, right,
or kind of like painted in a situation where because
I don't do these things, it makes me look stronger,
but in reality it's actually a.
Speaker 5 (13:21):
Sign of weakness to me.
Speaker 3 (13:25):
I feel like it steps to it. I feel like
we're getting there, you know what I mean.
Speaker 4 (13:29):
I feel like this is the most I've seen mental
health being spoken about ever.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
It's cool now, like it's one of those things that's
a hot button topic, but I don't feel like we're
using it right yet. So, like, if you think back
to the early two thousands, you in a white neighborhood,
you see white folks jogging. You like, damn, why are
these folks sold into health?
Speaker 5 (13:52):
You feel me.
Speaker 3 (13:53):
But now you go to a black neighborhood, you see
black folks jogging, Like we behind, Like we catching up,
We get in there, but we ain't there yet.
Speaker 5 (14:01):
So like we using these mental health terms like, oh,
he bipolar, he's narcissistic and narcissistic.
Speaker 3 (14:07):
You don't know what that means. It's a whole criteria
that you have to meet before somebody's bipolar and narcissistic.
But we know what those terms mean.
Speaker 5 (14:15):
Now.
Speaker 3 (14:16):
You could asks a person the early two thousands what
narcissistic mean a black person.
Speaker 5 (14:21):
They'll be like, what's that? You know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (14:22):
So we're getting there, you know what I mean, but
we ain't there yet. That's where That's how I feel
about it.
Speaker 6 (14:27):
It's kind of it's kind of like a it's slow motion,
but its motion right exactly. You know, and you you
touched on a really good subject because I noticed the
same thing right Like in my neighborhood. I would get
up every morning and I would see, like, you know,
my white neighbors, everybody's jogging, everybody's working out, and and
I'm over here like why we don't do this?
Speaker 2 (14:50):
You know what I mean? They like, you go to
the grocery store, they reading what's what's the ingredients in it?
Speaker 6 (14:56):
And it's like, I feel like all that mental health
health is a part of health in general, you know
what I mean? Because I didn't it took me a
while to start going to a therapist to understand that.
I said, man, I need help on the things that
I was traumatized in my childhood, to understand that that
that's really who you become, right Like we really who
(15:17):
we are today based on the things that we went
through as a kid. Because I would do certain things
and I'm like, I'm an adult, why am I keep
doing this? And then you know, I go talk to
a specialist and they say, well, how is your childhood?
What are some things that like some behaviors that you've
seen in your childhood that make you act this certain
(15:38):
type of way. So that's why I feel like a
lot of times where like you know, it's suck to say,
but like a lot of black men don't know how
to resolve issues in a.
Speaker 4 (15:46):
Healthier way that we deal with in our community with
the beef and the streets and all this stuff.
Speaker 6 (15:52):
And I never understood that until I went to a therapist.
And you know, therapists like, well, how did you see
situations get handl when you was a kid?
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Why see violence?
Speaker 6 (16:03):
So what so you were going to see a specialist,
what about the millions of people that are going through
these things that didn't go see a specialist.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
You said something super powerful, like it's trauma that we
live through as kids. We don't normalize that shit like
we think it's normal.
Speaker 5 (16:21):
We think we're supposed to be going through this.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
Like and it's cool to go through this.
Speaker 5 (16:25):
It's street credit.
Speaker 3 (16:28):
There's so many things that's traumatic that we don't really
give any credit to. Like any separation in parenting is trauma.
Poverty is trauma.
Speaker 1 (16:38):
Uh, definitely trauma.
Speaker 5 (16:41):
Any loss of a loved one, it's trauma, you know
what I mean?
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Like we normalize that ship like oh, yeah, my daddy
died last last week.
Speaker 5 (16:48):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
I'm all right, Yeah, we need to talk that out.
Speaker 5 (16:53):
Definitely, that's not something that just goes away, you know
what I mean.
Speaker 4 (16:57):
I want to share something I learned with my therapist,
and mine was and I want you guys to expound
on them if you can. Mine was setting boundaries. I
didn't understand the word boundaries and how it could help
my mental state of mind, cause you know, I've been
outside for a while. I got multiple baby mama's married
(17:17):
at five kids, I got a lot going on. Not
to say any of that is negative, but I didn't
understand how boundaries affected my mental health, and it helped
me with my parents, oh, my wife, my kids, mother's,
(17:38):
my kids, my coworkers, all my different jobs that I have.
Because I also feel like the entrepreneur is heavily recommended
to speak to a therapist weekly. Man, if you're an entrepreneur,
correct me if I'm wrong. Guys, everybody's listening. If you
have to figure out how you make your money, or
sometimes you can have a great month in a very
(18:00):
bad month and you can try your best to be consistent,
that's just not the entrepreneur way. I feel like the
mental health thing is very challenging because you're dealing with
so much emotions and you have to put boundaries in
place if you do not. I was literally talking to
one of my good friends today on the phone, Kristen.
She works for me, she works, and she's completely oppotus.
(18:23):
She's white, she works on the country radio station.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
She says, the.
Speaker 4 (18:27):
Things that you're working on will come out if you
don't set the proper boundaries to that.
Speaker 5 (18:34):
You, guys, say what.
Speaker 3 (18:35):
I always I got a saying bad for being lengthy
because you gave me so many thoughts. My saying is
you teach people how to treat you with your first
couple interactions, whether they know it or not, or whether
it's conscious or not. They're gathering information on how to
(18:56):
approach you. Right, So, just like you said, if you
don't set no boundaries, then they feel like it's a
free for all and then eventually you get mad and
you like, why is he or he or she treated
me like that? Well, you actually set up the boundaries
around your relationship, like you have to set boundaries around
certain things like for instance, I'm an entrepreneur as well,
(19:18):
I don't have traditional nine to five hours like I
book sessions if I'm free, you know what I'm saying,
So it's flexible. But the people in my life will
call me at noon, Hey can you come and do this.
I'm not even gonna answer the phone because I don't
want you thinking tomorrow. You can call me at noon
because tomorrow I might be busy at noon. Just hold
(19:41):
off until five like you do with everybody else, you
know what I'm saying. So, yeah, you got us set
that boundary. And it's even harder to set boundaries with
people Like you said, your parents care about Yeah, you
care about them.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
My mom calls me three times in a row. No
matter what, I gotta step outside and say, Ma, good,
oh I need help with I'm over here, like.
Speaker 5 (20:01):
Did you put that on you back?
Speaker 1 (20:03):
Like this is this is? I call you later.
Speaker 3 (20:09):
It's funny that we talked about boundaries because he's more
of the boundary setter, like, uh, naturally, I'm more of
the give a person the benefit of the doubt thing.
So I've lived through the negative the consequences of not
setting boundaries. So a lot of times, like if you
don't set boundaries, you end up living on somebody else's terms.
(20:31):
You know what I'm saying, You end up you end
up catering to somebody that you didn't even mean to
cater to, Like now I'm waiting on you, I'm on
your schedule. I'm talking to you when you free, you
know what I'm saying, instead of vice versa. So it's
definitely important and it's crazy we got something man, like
(20:52):
this is a good this is a healthy conversation.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
And I know and I'm sorry for interrupting.
Speaker 4 (20:57):
I just know someone watching will be in the comments
like oh I needed to hear.
Speaker 5 (21:01):
This, yeah, yeah, fact.
Speaker 4 (21:03):
Because once one person's comfortable speaking about their transgressions. Yeah,
and it ignites something to someone else. So even if
it's just one person, Yeah, that's good.
Speaker 3 (21:14):
That's funny you said that. I was actually talking to
somebody about. Like mental health and physical health is very similar.
And if you ever having a hard time understanding why
something is important in mental health, it's easy if you
translate it into physical health. Right, just like you said,
in our community, it feels like I'm crazy or it's
(21:37):
something wrong with me, or I don't have it none
of control when I'm seeking help for mental health. But
if you go to a physical health facility like a
gym or a spa, it's people.
Speaker 5 (21:48):
In there that look like they work out every day.
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (21:51):
It's people in there that look like they this is
their first work.
Speaker 5 (21:53):
Out in life. But nobody is in the wrong place,
you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (21:57):
Like it's no wrong place to start doing something positive,
you know what I'm saying. So if your mental health
is like you take your mental health everywhere you take
your physical health, you know.
Speaker 1 (22:11):
What I'm saying, it's one of the same. If you
ask me if you if you.
Speaker 3 (22:14):
Fucked I had this one dude, he was like, bro,
if I knew you was out here, I would have
been had went and seek therapy because every time I
see a therapist depicted on you know, on the movie,
it's somebody I can't relate to, and it's.
Speaker 6 (22:29):
Always and it's always like it's like, you know, I
feel like the like the film industry made like our
culture think that, like we can't afford.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
That, right, and you got to be crazy or you
gotta be crazy.
Speaker 6 (22:43):
When I told my mom I went to therapy, I
was like, you know, I'm going to therapy and I'm
learning so many tools and stuff to like implement in
my life.
Speaker 2 (22:51):
And she said, boy, you ain't crazy.
Speaker 1 (22:56):
Probably she probably didn't mean it that way.
Speaker 4 (22:59):
She's just going off of how she perceived it, right.
Speaker 2 (23:03):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (23:04):
And too, I think that speaks to what he said
generational curses. Like I took a class called abnormal Psychology
to where we had to learn what was normal and
what was not normal. So if you see something that's happening,
if from your framework, if it's something that you've always seen,
you're not gonna think of it as abnormal. So we
had to take a whole class like what's normal, what's
(23:27):
not normal?
Speaker 5 (23:28):
Right? So in this.
Speaker 3 (23:30):
Class, it was the study. This lady was cutting off
the back of her bread. She was like, this is
how we do it. This, how my grandmama did this,
How my mama did it, this, how we do it.
One day the granddaughter was like, why are we cutting
off the back of the bread.
Speaker 5 (23:43):
She said, I don't know. Ask Mom. I asked mom.
Mom didn't know. Ask grandma. I asked grandma. We finally
asked grandma and Grandma.
Speaker 3 (23:49):
Said, baby, I just cut off the back of the
bread because my pan was too short. It created a tradition, right,
but the tradition came from one person's need. You feel
me like that don't even apply to us. But we're
still doing the traditional things, you know what I mean.
Speaker 6 (24:10):
And that's and that's that's that's a good take because
I see what I see what you're saying.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
It's like we go through.
Speaker 6 (24:17):
Generations after generations, at the generations and and you know,
I feel like the generation now is like, you know,
people will listen to what a rappers say and think
it's normal, but people won't listen to a therapist and
think it's normal.
Speaker 5 (24:33):
A rapper is speaking his truth. You don't live that
life for sure. You didn't just jump sometime.
Speaker 3 (24:42):
Sometimes that's the problem because it's entertainment, But go ahead
take it seriously. Here's another thing I noticed about entertainers.
Most of the time, they pour themselves into their work
as their therapy. Right, So it's like, I'm really speaking
out my trauma. I'm speaking out shit that I went through,
(25:04):
so you don't have to go through it now, so
you can go and mimic it, you know what I'm saying,
Like I don't want you to go through this stuff
because I had to go through it. And it's almost
like if y'all do this, you know for a living,
when you stressed out, you coming here, That don't make sense,
Like it's completely the opposite of self care. Self care
is supposed to separate you from whatever it.
Speaker 4 (25:26):
Is you said self care. A lot of people don't.
I would say, prioritize self care when in reality that's
the most important thing that you should prioritize your mental spaces,
like I never forget. Man, I'm gonna say something coded
because a lot of people.
Speaker 1 (25:45):
Watch the show.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
So then example I would give is, you know, someone
comes home from work and they're just mad because they'll
come home from work. Well, it affects the kids, it
affects anyone who's in that house especially. We gotta do
a better job just as a people understanding when you
come home and you have a family, everything that happened,
(26:11):
we got to decompress it in a way to when
you walk in that house and you smile, or before
you leave the house, when you wake up, you smile.
Speaker 1 (26:18):
I used to be that guy.
Speaker 4 (26:19):
I used to get up early in the morning and
to be upset, like I hate waking up early, but
I gotta take my kids to school. And once I
learned that I can control how I feel, I said, oh,
so I just started looking at the positives and everything.
I was like, man, I get to take my kids
to school every day. My parents didn't have time to
do that, they had to go to work. So this
(26:41):
is something that my kids to do do with me
every day. And then I started implementing the gym. I
started working out. I hate working out, but I got
high cholesterol. So either I'm gonna take these pills every
day or I'm a workout and get my cholesterol levels
let down. So now I got a whole routine that
I implemented with a therapist on Wednesday at five o'clock.
Speaker 1 (27:00):
So now I'm just structuring my life.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
But I'm keep in mind forty one, so I'm I
wish I knew this in twenty one. I'm thinking of
how advanced and how further on I would have been
in my life had But then again, sometimes I feel
like this is my sermon. I kind of had to
not do it so I can take it seriously.
Speaker 3 (27:20):
Without a test, you don't got no testimony. Boom, you
feel me. Without a test, you don't have no y'all.
Speaker 1 (27:25):
Got come once a month, we got work something.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
Now, yeah, this is a needed conversation in the culture.
Speaker 1 (27:32):
Yeah. Facts, But see y'all, see y'all.
Speaker 4 (27:35):
Remember I felt like career days for me, I take
that serious when I do it. So I walk in
the career day looking like this, and.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
Kids be like, dude, what do you do? I said,
talk on the radio?
Speaker 5 (27:46):
They do a podcast?
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Ever, see that?
Speaker 4 (27:47):
Because everyone else on career day has a suit on,
or they're a fireman or a policeman. They're just not
paying attention to all these different things that you can be.
You guys, are vital and important because of how you look.
I can literally say, wow, that's a job description that
I could do.
Speaker 5 (28:05):
Yeah, that's normally our first conversation.
Speaker 3 (28:09):
So we do a lot of community mental health, like
working with kids in the community.
Speaker 5 (28:14):
Who don't even want therapy.
Speaker 1 (28:15):
That's great.
Speaker 3 (28:16):
They actually got in trouble, so one of the consequences
to whatever they did is seeing us basically.
Speaker 1 (28:24):
So normally they look at us like, oh I expected
to see Okay, this.
Speaker 5 (28:31):
Ain't so bad. I had a dude, man that was sixteen.
He wouldn't speak to me.
Speaker 3 (28:35):
So he had had therapists before, so he already was
privy to the whole process, right, Like, I don't want
to talk to no therapists. I'm cool, I said. I
had a I had a supervisor at the time. I
was like, man, normally these kids gravitate to me, like
the way I look. They like, damn, let me what
kind of Jesus though, whatever the case may be. So
(28:56):
this kid wouldn't say nothing to me, So I'm like, damn.
Through to him, I asked my supervisor. He said, embraced
the silence. That's the only thing he said to me.
Embrace the silence, he said. If he don't talk to
you is at the end of the world. I'm like, nah, shit,
I'm gonna get paid anyway. So I sat there with him.
(29:18):
I'm like, bro, you don't want to talk to me.
Guess what, I don't want to talk to you either.
It's my job to talk to you. So shit, I'm
gonna sit here for an hour. You sit here for
an hour. Were gonna go our separate way. We sat
there for two hours like that, one week, an hour
silence the next week.
Speaker 5 (29:33):
By the end of the set, she was like, all right, bro,
what you want to talk about? What? He just broke down?
Told me everything.
Speaker 3 (29:40):
I'm mad at my mama, I'm mad at my daddy
because of this happened. This happened, This happened, This happened.
So it's like, at some point he was like, this
dude is a dude just like me. At some point
we're gonna get tired of looking at each other in
the face and I'm gonna talk to him. And that's
what happens. So it's like, like you said, the approachability
(30:00):
of it, I mean, just having a normal conversation and
not structuring it like therapy.
Speaker 5 (30:06):
It goes a long way in our community.
Speaker 3 (30:08):
Definitely, and what I have learned through that experience doing
the mental health in the community. It's like when you
go to somebody house, you got a different version of them.
Speaker 5 (30:19):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (30:20):
Like, if they come and sit in your office and
sit in the chair and sit up right, they gonna
tell you everything you know, prim and proper.
Speaker 5 (30:26):
And do it the right way.
Speaker 3 (30:28):
But if you at my house, like, you gonna get
a different version of those people. So what I learned
how to do is be a translator of mental health
stuff into regular stuff. You know what I'm saying, Like
if you twelve thirteen years old, you stay in one
of them viills Mechanicsville, And he said one of them vials,
(30:51):
any one of the bills you in there, right, so Thomasville, Yeah,
you remember that. So it was like you your reality
is not a long, three four syllable word.
Speaker 5 (31:05):
Your reality is.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
Like you said, guns, violence, drugs, you know whatever it is.
So you gotta develop a skill set that turns you
into a translator.
Speaker 5 (31:17):
Like, bro, I know all of it.
Speaker 3 (31:19):
Your treatment plan, because we have a treatment plan. Your
treatment plan is confusing to you, right, let me tell
you the goals working on anger management, conflict resolution and communication. Communication, right,
they can understand that. But if I broke down your
whole treatment plan, you're gonna be like, bro, I don't
(31:39):
feel like talking about that. Yeah, you know what I'm saying, like, yeah, yeah,
I got suspended at school for fighting.
Speaker 5 (31:46):
But he stepped on my brand new shoes. He tried me,
He tried.
Speaker 6 (31:50):
Me, And these are probably conversation that y'all have and
y'all over here looking like, bro, this is the least
of your words when you become an adult, because stepping
on your shoes gonna be when you get these Georgia
power bills and you like, you're not gonna be thinking
about no new shoes when you know, when you when
you really look at like the future. What I want
to ask you guys, is that do you guys ever
(32:13):
do And I don't even know if it's sustaining, but
does law enforcement do therapy?
Speaker 5 (32:18):
That is a good question. That was amazing question.
Speaker 3 (32:22):
So we had we got a police officer that lives
in our subdivision, so we pulled him to the side
when all of this police brutality stuff was.
Speaker 5 (32:29):
Going on, right, we was like, dang, bro, at the
end of.
Speaker 3 (32:33):
The day, any police officer by the end of the
month at least got PTSD just because.
Speaker 5 (32:42):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (32:43):
So we was talking to him, and he was giving
us every reason why police would not go for that.
He was like, well, we already got to see a
person for this, and then we already got a budget
for that, and then I don't know, because we gotta
do this and we gotta do that. I'm like, I
really don't understand why police wouldn't run to a therapist.
Speaker 2 (33:05):
It seems like a business.
Speaker 5 (33:06):
Oh no, I can speak to that too. I think.
Speaker 3 (33:11):
To speak to what he was saying is I think
police officers feel this need to be the controller, you
know what I'm saying, and not to feel like I have.
I'm out of I'm outside of my realm of control.
So when he was talking to us, because I was
right there too, he was trying to tell us how
(33:32):
they have that.
Speaker 5 (33:33):
Under control already, right, And I.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
Was thinking to myself, obviously.
Speaker 3 (33:38):
You don't, because for me, I've been, like you said
when we were talking about earlier, all of the veils.
You go into somebody house, you don't know what's in
that house, right, You got to have some savvy about
yourself you gotta have some people skills. You got to
have some conflict resolution skills. You gotta have some something
that allows you to deescalate a conflict as opposed to
(34:02):
you know, coming in on the like the strong arm.
Speaker 5 (34:06):
Right.
Speaker 3 (34:06):
So a lot of the times, even with you know,
people getting killed on the side of the road because
they got pulled over for speeding. Yeah, bro, like you,
the police officer has to be held accountable for their
level of community.
Speaker 4 (34:19):
And what's their treatment plan when they get into something
big to that.
Speaker 2 (34:23):
And you never you never hear that.
Speaker 6 (34:24):
And the reason why that I asked that is because
like I want to try to break the narrative and
break the curse of like our culture has like this,
this tension against the police department. So me and ferrari
Uh we did a community event with the mayor and
ti Uh you know around the holiday season. And one
of the conversations that I have with the police department
in Atlanta, and I said, hey man, how can we
(34:47):
come together and we go talk to these kids and
were gonna start breaking his tension.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
So mentally, what I started doing was.
Speaker 6 (34:57):
It's something I never did, right, Like you'll go out,
you'll see a cop might not speak to the person.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
He might not even look at the cop.
Speaker 6 (35:02):
Right, So what I realize is like every time I
have an interaction or bypassing with a cop, I'll be like,
how you doing, how'd you day going, Like just just
having a conversation, and like you can feel the tension,
like they like, bro, don't talk to me. That's the reason,
(35:24):
that's the reason why it's so much friction. And then
I have cops that I'm friends with that work in
the nightclubs and ain't the coolest guys ever, I ain't
be to you good.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
But then I said, this is this is the disconnect, right.
Speaker 6 (35:39):
The disconnect is when you see law enforcement and these
people don't have a there's no bridge with the community.
Like you can tell you can automatically look at law
enforcement and can tell they don't want to talk to you.
Speaker 3 (35:53):
It's so funny, Like I don't know if this is
every black man's experience, but when a police officer just
behind me, I pull over.
Speaker 5 (36:03):
I let that man go, even if I ain't doing
nothing wrong.
Speaker 3 (36:06):
I just feeld man AROUNDTSD when they around me, I
feel not safe.
Speaker 6 (36:14):
You automatically feel like it don't matter, like it don't
matter if you're in the right or wrong.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
You you're wrong, you know what I mean.
Speaker 6 (36:22):
And like I've had the same the same scenarios to
where like I remember I was leaving the radio station.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
I was driving home and man, this cop followed me like.
Speaker 6 (36:33):
Five blocks to the port where I just stopped my
car and I pulled over. He pulled me over, and
I was like, what's up? Why are you following me?
Here's all your task spot. I said, Man, you.
Speaker 2 (36:43):
Didn't have to follow me for five blocks and let
me know my tax inspired you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 6 (36:48):
But granted, he was super cool, super chill about it.
I went for a walk in my neighborhood ran into
him again. I said, hey, man, you pulled me over earlier.
He was like, he was like, yeah, yeah, that was
I was like, I appreciate you telling me my tax.
My tax has been a spar for three months because
my birthday passed and you know, I'm not paying attack.
(37:09):
But I had a conversation with him because I'm like,
these are conversations that we just need to It just
needs to be some type of dialogue to be more
It needs.
Speaker 4 (37:18):
To be more right now, It's like second to none.
There's no dialogue between police officers and certain areas and
certain people that look like us have a dialogue.
Speaker 3 (37:31):
So I think people feel like you choose your profession.
I think it's the other way around. Profession chooses your
profession chooses you. So just think about, I mean, just
let's use a mental health term, how much stuff those
police officers might have went through before they joined the
how much them is the dudes not trying to be funny,
(37:53):
didn't make the football team, you know what I'm saying.
Nobody respected them at school. Nobody stopped talking when they
started talking. So when I'm an adult, I'm about to
get a job where you gotta listen to me, you
know what I'm saying, Like, you don't got no choice
but to pull over when I'm behind you.
Speaker 2 (38:10):
Oh, let's twist it like this.
Speaker 6 (38:11):
Think about how much they went through the day before
they pulled you over, before they talked to you or
somebody somebody broke that down to me, because I'm like, man,
why every time you run into like law for it's
like always It's like they said, Well, think about how
many bad people that they had to run into to
run into a good person.
Speaker 1 (38:30):
So they sometimes can't tell who who.
Speaker 2 (38:33):
They can't tell.
Speaker 6 (38:33):
Who because they you know, we all they looking at
us like we all look the same, so we don't
know what you own, you know.
Speaker 5 (38:39):
What I'm saying. And on top of that day underpaid,
you know what.
Speaker 1 (38:43):
I mean, that's fact getting started on that they show.
Speaker 5 (38:47):
Up broke and man, it's all bad.
Speaker 2 (38:52):
All right.
Speaker 4 (38:53):
So I want you guys to promote your company, your
mental health therapy company.
Speaker 1 (39:02):
Let's talk about it. Let's let's go into it.
Speaker 3 (39:05):
So we got a couple of things going on right now.
So you can find me on Psychology Today www. Dye
psychologytoday dot com. My name is Terrell Tipper, and what
my private practice is focused on is actually breaking down
the stigma that's attached to mental health in the black community.
Speaker 5 (39:26):
So if I had to, like, you know, choose a niche,
it would be people who was.
Speaker 3 (39:32):
Like me when I was growing up, Like I grew
up in a you know, typical scenario for the for
the hood, you know what I'm saying. Like my mom
was murdered when I was six, went to low uh,
you know, it's life, but I definitely appreciate that, went
to live with my grandmama. And my grandma was like
(39:53):
she was she was a saint, you know what I'm saying.
Like she was a beauty shop owner. And I don't
know if you'll ever been in a the shop, but
it's similar to the barbershop where people just come in
and just unload on. So I was like, damn, Like
my my grandmama is like a literal therapist, Like you
don't got no credentials for it. But I knew it
(40:15):
was serious when my friends start bypassing my room and
going to my grandma room, like, hey, bro, I need
to talk to your grandmama.
Speaker 5 (40:21):
I'm stressed.
Speaker 3 (40:23):
I'm like, for real, I thought you came over here
to hoop, like, but it was one of them things
where it's like you either blessed with it or you ain't,
and it's like you cannot turn that off.
Speaker 5 (40:37):
It's crazy.
Speaker 3 (40:38):
I could be going through whatever and somebody, I don't
know if you like, what's up?
Speaker 6 (40:41):
Bro?
Speaker 5 (40:41):
What's your name? Man? You you? Oh that's your oh man?
Speaker 3 (40:45):
My my uncle's is twins and they did this and
did that, and my daddy.
Speaker 5 (40:49):
I'm like, bro, I don't want to know your whole
life story. I just met you. Today.
Speaker 3 (40:53):
But it's something I guess it's written on my face
where I actually care about people, you know what I'm
saying and what they going through and if it's something
that I could give you that can help you through
that scenario. Like I said, I don't think you get
to choose that. I think that kind of chooses you. Yeah,
I agree with that. Another thing that we're working on
(41:13):
to us would s be global and that's how we met.
Speaker 5 (41:15):
Y'all.
Speaker 2 (41:15):
Yo, say what's up?
Speaker 5 (41:19):
Say these what's up.
Speaker 3 (41:20):
But at the end of the day, it's like, for
a long time we were helping one person at a time,
which was great and it was paying the bills. But
in order to reach the masses, we kind of be
I feel like we need to be a little bit.
Speaker 5 (41:33):
More in the mainstream so that the platform.
Speaker 1 (41:36):
You're one of the biggest ones right now.
Speaker 3 (41:39):
So you know what I'm saying, you forty one, I'm
forty one. We grew up in a time where you
didn't really just put the camera on you all day
every day.
Speaker 5 (41:47):
You know what I mean. You didn't just broadcast everything.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
You hated that.
Speaker 5 (41:52):
I'm just like.
Speaker 3 (41:53):
Feminine and not masculine, Like, why are you taking pictures
all day, every day are.
Speaker 5 (42:01):
But real.
Speaker 3 (42:02):
But now it's like we have to embrace that now,
Like if you not on Instagram and it's a free platform,
it's like you behind.
Speaker 1 (42:14):
The time and you leave some money on the table too.
Speaker 3 (42:18):
It's funny you said there, So what I was, what
I was noticing is just like you said back in
the day, if somebody pulled a camera and start filming you.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
Like cops like you doing.
Speaker 3 (42:30):
But now it's almost like like you said, you're leaving
money on the table if you're not publicizing what you're doing.
You know what I'm saying, Like like you said, it
could be I could be working with a little Johnny
on anger management and he might get through his scenario.
Speaker 5 (42:45):
But if it was on Instagram.
Speaker 3 (42:47):
Or on ball er Alert on whatever, it could be
fifty little Johnny's.
Speaker 4 (42:51):
Yeah, this is one thing of one thing I've learned
about content. It's replayable, you know, and especially if it's
really good content, meaningful and authentic, it lasts a very
very long time. I can tell you, man, some people
are arguing right now in the comments on my page
and me and this guy was just talking about the
three top three malls in Atlanta.
Speaker 1 (43:12):
He was like, I don't even go to the mall.
Speaker 4 (43:14):
So we get in comments of people say yeah, I'm
with BT, I don't shop at the mall. And I
got people people saying, why the hell you said, stone
crass mall?
Speaker 5 (43:20):
For all right, I'm over here.
Speaker 1 (43:22):
I like sneakers.
Speaker 4 (43:23):
They got fifty sneaker stores, and that's in that thirty
jewelers stores.
Speaker 1 (43:29):
It's suitable for me.
Speaker 5 (43:30):
Anyway.
Speaker 4 (43:31):
I shadn't say it's content and it's continuing to go.
But I feel like, you guys, man, we gotta figure
this out because.
Speaker 6 (43:37):
We definitely gonna we definitely gonna do a part two, three,
four five.
Speaker 2 (43:41):
See, yeah, we're gon We're gonna.
Speaker 1 (43:43):
This is essential.
Speaker 4 (43:45):
You guys are essential workers, Yes, telling you bro, anything
with the mod like you guys, trainers like the good ones.
Of course, in the gym, I was talking to my
man Jay Rock. Since I got disciplined with my fitness
and my mental health, I feel so wealthy. This don't
got nothing to do with money, bro. I can literally
(44:07):
look at somebody and be like, yeah, you fucked up,
But it's got.
Speaker 5 (44:10):
Nothing to do with money.
Speaker 1 (44:12):
You got, you got some other shit going on.
Speaker 4 (44:15):
I'm cool, because I can navigate mentally through whatever, because
I said boundaries, I'm working out, I'm getting, I'm getting
all my ship off, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 6 (44:25):
How damn you know, sometimes I'll be having days, but
you know what, I do realize that like a lot
of times, uh, people might be rich financially, but people
ain't rich in spiriting. And you can see it on
people's faces all the time. I see hundreds of people
a day and you might be like, why does this
person act like this, and like they mind ain't right,
(44:47):
you know, and you can't. And I learned you can't
match energy.
Speaker 5 (44:52):
You can't because it's too many, it's too many to
try to match.
Speaker 3 (44:55):
I feel like I feel like financial being financially set,
that that skill set is totally opposite from being good.
Speaker 5 (45:06):
In the head.
Speaker 1 (45:08):
We will do that part two.
Speaker 6 (45:09):
That's all.
Speaker 2 (45:11):
Listen, listen, we're gonna bring y'all that.
Speaker 5 (45:14):
We're gonna bring yaf that lot.
Speaker 4 (45:18):
Our cameras running out to So yeah, boy, that's the
whole things that.
Speaker 3 (45:22):
Make you mentally sound work against you, show man. You
know what I mean, Like most folks that got the
most money.
Speaker 2 (45:29):
That I know, oh man, oh man.
Speaker 5 (45:32):
Wait and yes, people around stop.
Speaker 4 (45:36):
Stop stop, we got we gotta definitely do a part
two three four tell them how to follow.
Speaker 5 (45:41):
You follow me on Instagram.
Speaker 1 (45:43):
Uh, y'all got separate Instagram right, So.
Speaker 3 (45:48):
My Instagram is Tip Life T e P Underscore Life
with a Y and minus.
Speaker 5 (45:53):
Talk to Tip t A l K the number two
T E P. A.
Speaker 6 (45:58):
You're a big shout out to s B Global and
Global Talent Agency.
Speaker 2 (46:02):
Man, we thought to do a part too.
Speaker 5 (46:04):
Don't work mental health is real. We appreciate y'all.
Speaker 6 (46:12):
HM,
They get a little called me broadcast live from Atlanta,
Georgia walks to the ball Aer show.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
I go by the name for I go by the name.
Speaker 1 (00:11):
You know, BT, introduce yourself, fellas.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
My name is Terrell Tepper. I'm a mental health therapist
here in Atlanta. And my name is Tawan Tepper. I'm
a mental health therapist here in Atlanta as well.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
Wether the Baller.
Speaker 4 (00:24):
All right, all right, all right, now, you guys said
something very important that I feel like people that look
like us be l like I ain't crazy.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Yeah, you are.
Speaker 4 (00:35):
A mental health therapist. Well, first of all, you guys
are twins. Yeah, Because I talked to one person he.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Was like, nah, you're supposed to me.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
I was like, okay, okay, yeah, we met up before.
But I think it's I think it gives us a
little bit of an advantage just because when you see twins,
you don't forget twins, you know what I mean.
Speaker 5 (01:01):
That's true. You might not.
Speaker 3 (01:02):
Love us, you might hate us, but you ain't gonna
forget about us. I think we get to double down
on ship, you know what I'm saying. So like, if
I say certain things or feel a certain way, it's
one thing if I feel that way, but I gotta
already got like a built in authorage.
Speaker 5 (01:18):
So it's cool.
Speaker 6 (01:19):
I always wanted a twin because I always wanted to
be like men. My men and my twin brother, we
could try to like date the same people.
Speaker 4 (01:28):
I got my best friends, my best friends or my
cousins their twin cousins.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
And my wife is a twin.
Speaker 4 (01:32):
Actually, oh wow, I don't know why I'm always surrounded
by twins. It's funny, but twins always not necessarily don't
do that, do you right? Yeah, never tried it either,
Like I never tried that, I got different tastes.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
I'm pretty sure I.
Speaker 5 (01:48):
Never tried it.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
I think we got the same tastes of like looks,
but a personality probably would be different.
Speaker 6 (01:55):
But I never tried to play jokes on people, Like
when you talking to somebody and then you're like, I'm
gonna send brother go like to see if this person
know the difference.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
I'm pretty sure that happens that no time.
Speaker 5 (02:05):
That's normal.
Speaker 3 (02:07):
I've seen that, So I think what happened initially the
first time we ever switched up my in fourth grade,
my teacher and his teacher was best friends. They was
like homies for Fool's Day, and it was like, get
your brother out of class, go to the bathroom and
switch clothes, and then you go to his class and
he come over here to my class.
Speaker 5 (02:27):
That shit happened, and.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
We was there all day, literally, and nobody knew, and
that's crazy.
Speaker 5 (02:33):
Today she pulled.
Speaker 3 (02:34):
Her homie to the side and was like, you know,
you had the wrong kid in your class the whole day,
and it was It was like a funny thing. But
I think typically people want us to do twin shit
more than we want to do twin shit.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Like dress alike.
Speaker 6 (02:51):
Did y'all parents make y'all do that? Like when y'all
kids like dress alike and stuff like that.
Speaker 3 (02:55):
It's so crazy. We dressed alike up until high school.
So then when we start like in our own personalities
and stuff. We got to school and somebody was like,
that's weird that y'all still dress like.
Speaker 5 (03:10):
We didn't. We didn't know it was weird.
Speaker 3 (03:12):
We thought it was regular, right, So at that point
we went home changed and never dressed it like again,
like it was. It was a little bit when we
got to high school, it got a little bit weird
that you didn't have your own personality, you know.
Speaker 6 (03:26):
So that was that was did y'all y'all parents, and
it was like, hey, y'all got so y'all been y'all
been having us dressed like that, and we in school
looking weird pretty much.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
It's almost like, you know, from the outside looking in,
it seems like fun and it is. You know what
I'm saying, It's ups and downs. But like when I
can tell you right now, if I go to the
gym right now, Oh, if I go to the gym
right now, hoop, They're gonna be like, damn, bro, where's
your brother? And it's like, damn, it's just me today.
(04:00):
It's got to be good enough for you, you know
what I'm saying. If that's not good enough for you,
that I don't know what to tell you. He a
grown man. I don't even know where he at.
Speaker 4 (04:06):
Growing up with twins in my life and now being
married to identical twins, I see twins stuff all the time.
Do you guys like sometimes just meet somewhere randomly and.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Have on the same ship always. Yeah, I have this
all the time.
Speaker 4 (04:19):
I've seen that with my cousins and then with my
wife and y'all have they would literally show up somewhere
and have on damn near the same outfit, same color way.
Speaker 5 (04:29):
So it's like we think so similar.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
So it's like, if I feel like this is appropriate
to wear to this occasion, he gonna be thinking something
very similar. Be Damn, I need a polo, I need
some gins, I need some air force one.
Speaker 5 (04:43):
So we show up. It might not be the exact same, but.
Speaker 4 (04:45):
It's last thing, last thing, because we got I don't
want to get off topic, because twins are cool to me.
You know twins triplets? Do you guys both have kids
or no? So do you know that their kids are
siblings because they have the same DNA. So my because
my wife's kids and my and her twin sisters kids
their siblings because they have the same mom DNA, so
(05:08):
they have they share their DNA. Their DNA is exactly
the same. That's why they look the same.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
So their kids are like cousin siblings.
Speaker 5 (05:16):
That's crazy.
Speaker 3 (05:18):
I never heard it that way, but I do know.
We have the exact same fingerprint too. No wait, what
our fingerprint is exact same?
Speaker 6 (05:25):
Sometimes he committed crime and his fingerprint They coming to
get you too.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
They're gonna bring both of them in the figure to
figure out who did it.
Speaker 4 (05:34):
Wow, But some twins aren't though, because my my cousin
twins are fraternal.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Yeah I never asked my wife was her and her
twin sisters praternal twins? They don't look the same, so twins,
they just look different.
Speaker 3 (05:47):
So facts, But fraternal twins are two eggs that got separated, separated.
Speaker 5 (05:53):
Fertilized by the same sperm.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
But identical twins is one egg and one sperm was
fertilized and then they split.
Speaker 5 (06:01):
Ye does it make sense?
Speaker 2 (06:03):
Yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 6 (06:04):
That's crazy whole thing, bro, But so hard fraternal twins
were they still born.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Like together the same day?
Speaker 2 (06:10):
They just that's crazy.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
Like, imagine me and you be twins.
Speaker 4 (06:14):
We just don't look the same, we just but we
were born the same day, We shared the same DNA,
everything else is the same.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
We just don't look the same. Then, boy, they got
boy and girl twin too.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Yeah, I do know, I do know that.
Speaker 5 (06:23):
I know some twins look like the daddy and like
the mom.
Speaker 3 (06:29):
That's usually look like like like brown skin.
Speaker 1 (06:34):
I think the boy girl twin dynamic is weird too, it.
Speaker 4 (06:38):
Could I'd be like, how does this happen? How's one
of the girl, one's a boy, and y'all twins? I
always thought that was weird. But anyway, all right, so can.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
I ask one last one last twin question.
Speaker 6 (06:50):
Isn't today and age like you can like if you
if you were having a kid and you wanted twins,
you could, like, yes.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
Scientifically, yeah, yeah, you can do this.
Speaker 4 (07:00):
It's expensive though, bro, stuff like if you want, like,
it's expensive to have wins period.
Speaker 1 (07:08):
Like some people can't have kids, so you have to
get the in vitro.
Speaker 4 (07:12):
Yeah, that's expensive, but I think that's like ten thousand
to start, just to start d Yeah.
Speaker 5 (07:20):
Yeah, I didn't know that, but I do.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
I do think that, like nowadays, everything is manipulatable, you
know what I'm saying, Like, you want something, you can
pretty much figure out.
Speaker 5 (07:32):
Ever you can pay for it.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
Yeah, okay, my bad.
Speaker 4 (07:36):
I just had to ask because this is good, This
is good combo and we don't do interviews. We do
conversations when we when we do our content and stuff
like that.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
So is it now that you guys are twins?
Speaker 4 (07:48):
I kind of was going into this path of is
that the same thing that you wanted to do? The
mental health together.
Speaker 5 (07:55):
No, So I started in mental health.
Speaker 3 (07:58):
I got out establish my major in college psychology, and
he was actually physical therapy at Tennessee State.
Speaker 5 (08:07):
University of Tennessee State. Yes, sir, both of y'all. Okay,
that's a big deal, good deal.
Speaker 3 (08:15):
That's actually a funny story too. So I realized later
why as a football player they encourage you not to
declare a major up front, because once you declare a major,
you have to like make good grades to stay eligible
and you have to have a certain amount of credits
in that major. Yeah, so they was like, everybody that's
(08:38):
a freshman, don't declare a major.
Speaker 5 (08:40):
Just take core classes. You gotta do that.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
You gotta ta your core classes regardless.
Speaker 5 (08:44):
Yeah, you gotta get that out the way.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
They need y'all on the field.
Speaker 3 (08:46):
You're smarter, not bro like if you got economics.
Speaker 5 (08:51):
I don't think y'all. Everybody ain't smart out here.
Speaker 3 (08:56):
So let's just stay on the field and then we'll
figure the rest out later type situation. So I was like,
all right, in my mind, I was thinking, he gonna
do mental health, I'm gonna do physical health.
Speaker 5 (09:06):
We're gonna have a holistic health facility.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
At some point where you could and get you know,
get right from the mental space, get right from the
physical space. You got some injuries you need to recover from,
you know, whatever it is. And then my major, physical
health got lost its accreditation like like halfway through my
freshman year, and they was like, just keep on taking
(09:30):
courses and then switch your major before you graduate. I'm
glad I didn't do that because that major never did
get accredited.
Speaker 5 (09:37):
While I was at school.
Speaker 3 (09:38):
Would have more classes, yeah, I would have been a
super super senior.
Speaker 5 (09:44):
Transfer to another school, yeah, either one.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
So you switched to mental health.
Speaker 3 (09:48):
I switched to mental health, and I think it might
have been sophomore year where all of my credits got
transferred over.
Speaker 5 (09:59):
Which it was like a blessing. I didn't think that
was gonna happen.
Speaker 3 (10:03):
So I was like, damn, I'm gonna be behind because
I didn't choose a major when I should have.
Speaker 5 (10:08):
But it worked out, so it was good.
Speaker 1 (10:09):
All right. Now we got all that out of the way.
Liz get into the meat and potatoes.
Speaker 5 (10:14):
Pause.
Speaker 4 (10:17):
Why is it important for men? And I'll get into
the women, but why is it important for men to
explore their mental health and expand upon it?
Speaker 3 (10:30):
I feel like it's important for men to explore their
mental health just because we don't do that, you know
what I'm saying, Like we don't even why why because
at the end of the day, like we have to
be so much for so many people, you know what
I'm saying, Like we as men, normally were the head
of the household. Normally we are leaders in the workspace,
(10:53):
So if we don't take care of our mental space,
then it trickles down to so many other people. Also
feel like when you're the leader, it's a lot of
unspoken pressure for you to always have it together or
seem like you always have it together, and when you
are seeking help outside of yourself, it feels sometimes like
(11:16):
you don't have it together. Like I can't control this
without you know, somebody helping me control this. So I
don't want everybody else to see me as weak or
see me as flawed, or see me as you know,
whatever it is that don't.
Speaker 5 (11:30):
Really feel like a good leader, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
So I think most of the time, as men, especially
black men, we are kind of results driven, Like people
don't really care why you didn't get it done, you
know what I'm saying, It's just either you got that
shit done or you didn't get that shit done.
Speaker 5 (11:46):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (11:47):
If you didn't get it done, we gonna find somebody
else who's gonna.
Speaker 5 (11:49):
Get it done. To your point, I feel like that
we just live in a.
Speaker 3 (11:54):
No excuse society as men, you know what I mean.
Like we can't really say I made am mistake and
it's cool, you know what I mean. It's always consequences
attached to those mistakes. So the better headspace we in,
the more intentional we are about our mental the better
we can lead.
Speaker 4 (12:12):
I know BT has a question last one. I see
other ethnicities put mental health very important in their framework
of who they are. How Come there's a lack of
that and at the African American community, I gotta from
what I see right, correct me if I'm wrong.
Speaker 5 (12:31):
I can tell you no, No, you can completely right.
Speaker 3 (12:33):
As a matter of fact, I go to it like
a snooty gym a little bit, and the white guys
will sit up and brag about what their therapists recommended
that they do. You know what I'm saying. It's like
a status thing for them. But I think in our community,
for one, thing is generational curses. I think that most
of the stuff that the other cultures do, like cater
(12:55):
to their men, we don't do it.
Speaker 5 (12:57):
You know what I'm saying, Like.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
Pay attention to your mental health, we don't do it.
I think a lot of the things that we don't
do was kind of giving to us as a weakness, right,
or kind of like painted in a situation where because
I don't do these things, it makes me look stronger,
but in reality it's actually a.
Speaker 5 (13:21):
Sign of weakness to me.
Speaker 3 (13:25):
I feel like it steps to it. I feel like
we're getting there, you know what I mean.
Speaker 4 (13:29):
I feel like this is the most I've seen mental
health being spoken about ever.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
It's cool now, like it's one of those things that's
a hot button topic, but I don't feel like we're
using it right yet. So, like, if you think back
to the early two thousands, you in a white neighborhood,
you see white folks jogging. You like, damn, why are
these folks sold into health?
Speaker 5 (13:52):
You feel me.
Speaker 3 (13:53):
But now you go to a black neighborhood, you see
black folks jogging, Like we behind, Like we catching up,
We get in there, but we ain't there yet.
Speaker 5 (14:01):
So like we using these mental health terms like, oh,
he bipolar, he's narcissistic and narcissistic.
Speaker 3 (14:07):
You don't know what that means. It's a whole criteria
that you have to meet before somebody's bipolar and narcissistic.
But we know what those terms mean.
Speaker 5 (14:15):
Now.
Speaker 3 (14:16):
You could asks a person the early two thousands what
narcissistic mean a black person.
Speaker 5 (14:21):
They'll be like, what's that? You know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (14:22):
So we're getting there, you know what I mean, but
we ain't there yet. That's where That's how I feel
about it.
Speaker 6 (14:27):
It's kind of it's kind of like a it's slow motion,
but its motion right exactly. You know, and you you
touched on a really good subject because I noticed the
same thing right Like in my neighborhood. I would get
up every morning and I would see, like, you know,
my white neighbors, everybody's jogging, everybody's working out, and and
I'm over here like why we don't do this?
Speaker 2 (14:50):
You know what I mean? They like, you go to
the grocery store, they reading what's what's the ingredients in it?
Speaker 6 (14:56):
And it's like, I feel like all that mental health
health is a part of health in general, you know
what I mean? Because I didn't it took me a
while to start going to a therapist to understand that.
I said, man, I need help on the things that
I was traumatized in my childhood, to understand that that
that's really who you become, right Like we really who
(15:17):
we are today based on the things that we went
through as a kid. Because I would do certain things
and I'm like, I'm an adult, why am I keep
doing this? And then you know, I go talk to
a specialist and they say, well, how is your childhood?
What are some things that like some behaviors that you've
seen in your childhood that make you act this certain
(15:38):
type of way. So that's why I feel like a
lot of times where like you know, it's suck to say,
but like a lot of black men don't know how
to resolve issues in a.
Speaker 4 (15:46):
Healthier way that we deal with in our community with
the beef and the streets and all this stuff.
Speaker 6 (15:52):
And I never understood that until I went to a therapist.
And you know, therapists like, well, how did you see
situations get handl when you was a kid?
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Why see violence?
Speaker 6 (16:03):
So what so you were going to see a specialist,
what about the millions of people that are going through
these things that didn't go see a specialist.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
You said something super powerful, like it's trauma that we
live through as kids. We don't normalize that shit like
we think it's normal.
Speaker 5 (16:21):
We think we're supposed to be going through this.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
Like and it's cool to go through this.
Speaker 5 (16:25):
It's street credit.
Speaker 3 (16:28):
There's so many things that's traumatic that we don't really
give any credit to. Like any separation in parenting is trauma.
Poverty is trauma.
Speaker 1 (16:38):
Uh, definitely trauma.
Speaker 5 (16:41):
Any loss of a loved one, it's trauma, you know
what I mean?
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Like we normalize that ship like oh, yeah, my daddy
died last last week.
Speaker 5 (16:48):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
I'm all right, Yeah, we need to talk that out.
Speaker 5 (16:53):
Definitely, that's not something that just goes away, you know
what I mean.
Speaker 4 (16:57):
I want to share something I learned with my therapist,
and mine was and I want you guys to expound
on them if you can. Mine was setting boundaries. I
didn't understand the word boundaries and how it could help
my mental state of mind, cause you know, I've been
outside for a while. I got multiple baby mama's married
(17:17):
at five kids, I got a lot going on. Not
to say any of that is negative, but I didn't
understand how boundaries affected my mental health, and it helped
me with my parents, oh, my wife, my kids, mother's,
(17:38):
my kids, my coworkers, all my different jobs that I have.
Because I also feel like the entrepreneur is heavily recommended
to speak to a therapist weekly. Man, if you're an entrepreneur,
correct me if I'm wrong. Guys, everybody's listening. If you
have to figure out how you make your money, or
sometimes you can have a great month in a very
(18:00):
bad month and you can try your best to be consistent,
that's just not the entrepreneur way. I feel like the
mental health thing is very challenging because you're dealing with
so much emotions and you have to put boundaries in
place if you do not. I was literally talking to
one of my good friends today on the phone, Kristen.
She works for me, she works, and she's completely oppotus.
(18:23):
She's white, she works on the country radio station.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
She says, the.
Speaker 4 (18:27):
Things that you're working on will come out if you
don't set the proper boundaries to that.
Speaker 5 (18:34):
You, guys, say what.
Speaker 3 (18:35):
I always I got a saying bad for being lengthy
because you gave me so many thoughts. My saying is
you teach people how to treat you with your first
couple interactions, whether they know it or not, or whether
it's conscious or not. They're gathering information on how to
(18:56):
approach you. Right, So, just like you said, if you
don't set no boundaries, then they feel like it's a
free for all and then eventually you get mad and
you like, why is he or he or she treated
me like that? Well, you actually set up the boundaries
around your relationship, like you have to set boundaries around
certain things like for instance, I'm an entrepreneur as well,
(19:18):
I don't have traditional nine to five hours like I
book sessions if I'm free, you know what I'm saying,
So it's flexible. But the people in my life will
call me at noon, Hey can you come and do this.
I'm not even gonna answer the phone because I don't
want you thinking tomorrow. You can call me at noon
because tomorrow I might be busy at noon. Just hold
(19:41):
off until five like you do with everybody else, you
know what I'm saying. So, yeah, you got us set
that boundary. And it's even harder to set boundaries with
people Like you said, your parents care about Yeah, you
care about them.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
My mom calls me three times in a row. No
matter what, I gotta step outside and say, Ma, good,
oh I need help with I'm over here, like.
Speaker 5 (20:01):
Did you put that on you back?
Speaker 1 (20:03):
Like this is this is? I call you later.
Speaker 3 (20:09):
It's funny that we talked about boundaries because he's more
of the boundary setter, like, uh, naturally, I'm more of
the give a person the benefit of the doubt thing.
So I've lived through the negative the consequences of not
setting boundaries. So a lot of times, like if you
don't set boundaries, you end up living on somebody else's terms.
(20:31):
You know what I'm saying, You end up you end
up catering to somebody that you didn't even mean to
cater to, Like now I'm waiting on you, I'm on
your schedule. I'm talking to you when you free, you
know what I'm saying, instead of vice versa. So it's
definitely important and it's crazy we got something man, like
(20:52):
this is a good this is a healthy conversation.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
And I know and I'm sorry for interrupting.
Speaker 4 (20:57):
I just know someone watching will be in the comments
like oh I needed to hear.
Speaker 5 (21:01):
This, yeah, yeah, fact.
Speaker 4 (21:03):
Because once one person's comfortable speaking about their transgressions. Yeah,
and it ignites something to someone else. So even if
it's just one person, Yeah, that's good.
Speaker 3 (21:14):
That's funny you said that. I was actually talking to
somebody about. Like mental health and physical health is very similar.
And if you ever having a hard time understanding why
something is important in mental health, it's easy if you
translate it into physical health. Right, just like you said,
in our community, it feels like I'm crazy or it's
(21:37):
something wrong with me, or I don't have it none
of control when I'm seeking help for mental health. But
if you go to a physical health facility like a
gym or a spa, it's people.
Speaker 5 (21:48):
In there that look like they work out every day.
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (21:51):
It's people in there that look like they this is
their first work.
Speaker 5 (21:53):
Out in life. But nobody is in the wrong place,
you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (21:57):
Like it's no wrong place to start doing something positive,
you know what I'm saying. So if your mental health
is like you take your mental health everywhere you take
your physical health, you know.
Speaker 1 (22:11):
What I'm saying, it's one of the same. If you
ask me if you if you.
Speaker 3 (22:14):
Fucked I had this one dude, he was like, bro,
if I knew you was out here, I would have
been had went and seek therapy because every time I
see a therapist depicted on you know, on the movie,
it's somebody I can't relate to, and it's.
Speaker 6 (22:29):
Always and it's always like it's like, you know, I
feel like the like the film industry made like our
culture think that, like we can't afford.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
That, right, and you got to be crazy or you
gotta be crazy.
Speaker 6 (22:43):
When I told my mom I went to therapy, I
was like, you know, I'm going to therapy and I'm
learning so many tools and stuff to like implement in
my life.
Speaker 2 (22:51):
And she said, boy, you ain't crazy.
Speaker 1 (22:56):
Probably she probably didn't mean it that way.
Speaker 4 (22:59):
She's just going off of how she perceived it, right.
Speaker 2 (23:03):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (23:04):
And too, I think that speaks to what he said
generational curses. Like I took a class called abnormal Psychology
to where we had to learn what was normal and
what was not normal. So if you see something that's happening,
if from your framework, if it's something that you've always seen,
you're not gonna think of it as abnormal. So we
had to take a whole class like what's normal, what's
(23:27):
not normal?
Speaker 5 (23:28):
Right? So in this.
Speaker 3 (23:30):
Class, it was the study. This lady was cutting off
the back of her bread. She was like, this is
how we do it. This, how my grandmama did this,
How my mama did it, this, how we do it.
One day the granddaughter was like, why are we cutting
off the back of the bread.
Speaker 5 (23:43):
She said, I don't know. Ask Mom. I asked mom.
Mom didn't know. Ask grandma. I asked grandma. We finally
asked grandma and Grandma.
Speaker 3 (23:49):
Said, baby, I just cut off the back of the
bread because my pan was too short. It created a tradition, right,
but the tradition came from one person's need. You feel
me like that don't even apply to us. But we're
still doing the traditional things, you know what I mean.
Speaker 6 (24:10):
And that's and that's that's that's a good take because
I see what I see what you're saying.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
It's like we go through.
Speaker 6 (24:17):
Generations after generations, at the generations and and you know,
I feel like the generation now is like, you know,
people will listen to what a rappers say and think
it's normal, but people won't listen to a therapist and
think it's normal.
Speaker 5 (24:33):
A rapper is speaking his truth. You don't live that
life for sure. You didn't just jump sometime.
Speaker 3 (24:42):
Sometimes that's the problem because it's entertainment, But go ahead
take it seriously. Here's another thing I noticed about entertainers.
Most of the time, they pour themselves into their work
as their therapy. Right, So it's like, I'm really speaking
out my trauma. I'm speaking out shit that I went through,
(25:04):
so you don't have to go through it now, so
you can go and mimic it, you know what I'm saying,
Like I don't want you to go through this stuff
because I had to go through it. And it's almost
like if y'all do this, you know for a living,
when you stressed out, you coming here, That don't make sense,
Like it's completely the opposite of self care. Self care
is supposed to separate you from whatever it.
Speaker 4 (25:26):
Is you said self care. A lot of people don't.
I would say, prioritize self care when in reality that's
the most important thing that you should prioritize your mental spaces,
like I never forget. Man, I'm gonna say something coded
because a lot of people.
Speaker 1 (25:45):
Watch the show.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
So then example I would give is, you know, someone
comes home from work and they're just mad because they'll
come home from work. Well, it affects the kids, it
affects anyone who's in that house especially. We gotta do
a better job just as a people understanding when you
come home and you have a family, everything that happened,
(26:11):
we got to decompress it in a way to when
you walk in that house and you smile, or before
you leave the house, when you wake up, you smile.
Speaker 1 (26:18):
I used to be that guy.
Speaker 4 (26:19):
I used to get up early in the morning and
to be upset, like I hate waking up early, but
I gotta take my kids to school. And once I
learned that I can control how I feel, I said, oh,
so I just started looking at the positives and everything.
I was like, man, I get to take my kids
to school every day. My parents didn't have time to
do that, they had to go to work. So this
(26:41):
is something that my kids to do do with me
every day. And then I started implementing the gym. I
started working out. I hate working out, but I got
high cholesterol. So either I'm gonna take these pills every
day or I'm a workout and get my cholesterol levels
let down. So now I got a whole routine that
I implemented with a therapist on Wednesday at five o'clock.
Speaker 1 (27:00):
So now I'm just structuring my life.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
But I'm keep in mind forty one, so I'm I
wish I knew this in twenty one. I'm thinking of
how advanced and how further on I would have been
in my life had But then again, sometimes I feel
like this is my sermon. I kind of had to
not do it so I can take it seriously.
Speaker 3 (27:20):
Without a test, you don't got no testimony. Boom, you
feel me. Without a test, you don't have no y'all.
Speaker 1 (27:25):
Got come once a month, we got work something.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
Now, yeah, this is a needed conversation in the culture.
Speaker 1 (27:32):
Yeah. Facts, But see y'all, see y'all.
Speaker 4 (27:35):
Remember I felt like career days for me, I take
that serious when I do it. So I walk in
the career day looking like this, and.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
Kids be like, dude, what do you do? I said,
talk on the radio?
Speaker 5 (27:46):
They do a podcast?
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Ever, see that?
Speaker 4 (27:47):
Because everyone else on career day has a suit on,
or they're a fireman or a policeman. They're just not
paying attention to all these different things that you can be.
You guys, are vital and important because of how you look.
I can literally say, wow, that's a job description that
I could do.
Speaker 5 (28:05):
Yeah, that's normally our first conversation.
Speaker 3 (28:09):
So we do a lot of community mental health, like
working with kids in the community.
Speaker 5 (28:14):
Who don't even want therapy.
Speaker 1 (28:15):
That's great.
Speaker 3 (28:16):
They actually got in trouble, so one of the consequences
to whatever they did is seeing us basically.
Speaker 1 (28:24):
So normally they look at us like, oh I expected
to see Okay, this.
Speaker 5 (28:31):
Ain't so bad. I had a dude, man that was sixteen.
He wouldn't speak to me.
Speaker 3 (28:35):
So he had had therapists before, so he already was
privy to the whole process, right, Like, I don't want
to talk to no therapists. I'm cool, I said. I
had a I had a supervisor at the time. I
was like, man, normally these kids gravitate to me, like
the way I look. They like, damn, let me what
kind of Jesus though, whatever the case may be. So
(28:56):
this kid wouldn't say nothing to me, So I'm like, damn.
Through to him, I asked my supervisor. He said, embraced
the silence. That's the only thing he said to me.
Embrace the silence, he said. If he don't talk to
you is at the end of the world. I'm like, nah, shit,
I'm gonna get paid anyway. So I sat there with him.
(29:18):
I'm like, bro, you don't want to talk to me.
Guess what, I don't want to talk to you either.
It's my job to talk to you. So shit, I'm
gonna sit here for an hour. You sit here for
an hour. Were gonna go our separate way. We sat
there for two hours like that, one week, an hour
silence the next week.
Speaker 5 (29:33):
By the end of the set, she was like, all right, bro,
what you want to talk about? What? He just broke down?
Told me everything.
Speaker 3 (29:40):
I'm mad at my mama, I'm mad at my daddy
because of this happened. This happened, This happened, This happened.
So it's like, at some point he was like, this
dude is a dude just like me. At some point
we're gonna get tired of looking at each other in
the face and I'm gonna talk to him. And that's
what happens. So it's like, like you said, the approachability
(30:00):
of it, I mean, just having a normal conversation and
not structuring it like therapy.
Speaker 5 (30:06):
It goes a long way in our community.
Speaker 3 (30:08):
Definitely, and what I have learned through that experience doing
the mental health in the community. It's like when you
go to somebody house, you got a different version of them.
Speaker 5 (30:19):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (30:20):
Like, if they come and sit in your office and
sit in the chair and sit up right, they gonna
tell you everything you know, prim and proper.
Speaker 5 (30:26):
And do it the right way.
Speaker 3 (30:28):
But if you at my house, like, you gonna get
a different version of those people. So what I learned
how to do is be a translator of mental health
stuff into regular stuff. You know what I'm saying, Like
if you twelve thirteen years old, you stay in one
of them viills Mechanicsville, And he said one of them vials,
(30:51):
any one of the bills you in there, right, so Thomasville, Yeah,
you remember that. So it was like you your reality
is not a long, three four syllable word.
Speaker 5 (31:05):
Your reality is.
Speaker 3 (31:08):
Like you said, guns, violence, drugs, you know whatever it is.
So you gotta develop a skill set that turns you
into a translator.
Speaker 5 (31:17):
Like, bro, I know all of it.
Speaker 3 (31:19):
Your treatment plan, because we have a treatment plan. Your
treatment plan is confusing to you, right, let me tell
you the goals working on anger management, conflict resolution and communication. Communication, right,
they can understand that. But if I broke down your
whole treatment plan, you're gonna be like, bro, I don't
(31:39):
feel like talking about that. Yeah, you know what I'm saying, like, yeah, yeah,
I got suspended at school for fighting.
Speaker 5 (31:46):
But he stepped on my brand new shoes. He tried me,
He tried.
Speaker 6 (31:50):
Me, And these are probably conversation that y'all have and
y'all over here looking like, bro, this is the least
of your words when you become an adult, because stepping
on your shoes gonna be when you get these Georgia
power bills and you like, you're not gonna be thinking
about no new shoes when you know, when you when
you really look at like the future. What I want
to ask you guys, is that do you guys ever
(32:13):
do And I don't even know if it's sustaining, but
does law enforcement do therapy?
Speaker 5 (32:18):
That is a good question. That was amazing question.
Speaker 3 (32:22):
So we had we got a police officer that lives
in our subdivision, so we pulled him to the side
when all of this police brutality stuff was.
Speaker 5 (32:29):
Going on, right, we was like, dang, bro, at the
end of.
Speaker 3 (32:33):
The day, any police officer by the end of the
month at least got PTSD just because.
Speaker 5 (32:42):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (32:43):
So we was talking to him, and he was giving
us every reason why police would not go for that.
He was like, well, we already got to see a
person for this, and then we already got a budget
for that, and then I don't know, because we gotta
do this and we gotta do that. I'm like, I
really don't understand why police wouldn't run to a therapist.
Speaker 2 (33:05):
It seems like a business.
Speaker 5 (33:06):
Oh no, I can speak to that too. I think.
Speaker 3 (33:11):
To speak to what he was saying is I think
police officers feel this need to be the controller, you
know what I'm saying, and not to feel like I have.
I'm out of I'm outside of my realm of control.
So when he was talking to us, because I was
right there too, he was trying to tell us how
(33:32):
they have that.
Speaker 5 (33:33):
Under control already, right, And I.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
Was thinking to myself, obviously.
Speaker 3 (33:38):
You don't, because for me, I've been, like you said
when we were talking about earlier, all of the veils.
You go into somebody house, you don't know what's in
that house, right, You got to have some savvy about
yourself you gotta have some people skills. You got to
have some conflict resolution skills. You gotta have some something
that allows you to deescalate a conflict as opposed to
(34:02):
you know, coming in on the like the strong arm.
Speaker 5 (34:06):
Right.
Speaker 3 (34:06):
So a lot of the times, even with you know,
people getting killed on the side of the road because
they got pulled over for speeding. Yeah, bro, like you,
the police officer has to be held accountable for their
level of community.
Speaker 4 (34:19):
And what's their treatment plan when they get into something
big to that.
Speaker 2 (34:23):
And you never you never hear that.
Speaker 6 (34:24):
And the reason why that I asked that is because
like I want to try to break the narrative and
break the curse of like our culture has like this,
this tension against the police department. So me and ferrari
Uh we did a community event with the mayor and
ti Uh you know around the holiday season. And one
of the conversations that I have with the police department
in Atlanta, and I said, hey man, how can we
(34:47):
come together and we go talk to these kids and
were gonna start breaking his tension.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
So mentally, what I started doing was.
Speaker 6 (34:57):
It's something I never did, right, Like you'll go out,
you'll see a cop might not speak to the person.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
He might not even look at the cop.
Speaker 6 (35:02):
Right, So what I realize is like every time I
have an interaction or bypassing with a cop, I'll be like,
how you doing, how'd you day going, Like just just
having a conversation, and like you can feel the tension,
like they like, bro, don't talk to me. That's the reason,
(35:24):
that's the reason why it's so much friction. And then
I have cops that I'm friends with that work in
the nightclubs and ain't the coolest guys ever, I ain't
be to you good.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
But then I said, this is this is the disconnect, right.
Speaker 6 (35:39):
The disconnect is when you see law enforcement and these
people don't have a there's no bridge with the community.
Like you can tell you can automatically look at law
enforcement and can tell they don't want to talk to you.
Speaker 3 (35:53):
It's so funny, Like I don't know if this is
every black man's experience, but when a police officer just
behind me, I pull over.
Speaker 5 (36:03):
I let that man go, even if I ain't doing
nothing wrong.
Speaker 3 (36:06):
I just feeld man AROUNDTSD when they around me, I
feel not safe.
Speaker 6 (36:14):
You automatically feel like it don't matter, like it don't
matter if you're in the right or wrong.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
You you're wrong, you know what I mean.
Speaker 6 (36:22):
And like I've had the same the same scenarios to
where like I remember I was leaving the radio station.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
I was driving home and man, this cop followed me like.
Speaker 6 (36:33):
Five blocks to the port where I just stopped my
car and I pulled over. He pulled me over, and
I was like, what's up? Why are you following me?
Here's all your task spot. I said, Man, you.
Speaker 2 (36:43):
Didn't have to follow me for five blocks and let
me know my tax inspired you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 6 (36:48):
But granted, he was super cool, super chill about it.
I went for a walk in my neighborhood ran into
him again. I said, hey, man, you pulled me over earlier.
He was like, he was like, yeah, yeah, that was
I was like, I appreciate you telling me my tax.
My tax has been a spar for three months because
my birthday passed and you know, I'm not paying attack.
(37:09):
But I had a conversation with him because I'm like,
these are conversations that we just need to It just
needs to be some type of dialogue to be more
It needs.
Speaker 4 (37:18):
To be more right now, It's like second to none.
There's no dialogue between police officers and certain areas and
certain people that look like us have a dialogue.
Speaker 3 (37:31):
So I think people feel like you choose your profession.
I think it's the other way around. Profession chooses your
profession chooses you. So just think about, I mean, just
let's use a mental health term, how much stuff those
police officers might have went through before they joined the
how much them is the dudes not trying to be funny,
(37:53):
didn't make the football team, you know what I'm saying.
Nobody respected them at school. Nobody stopped talking when they
started talking. So when I'm an adult, I'm about to
get a job where you gotta listen to me, you
know what I'm saying, Like, you don't got no choice
but to pull over when I'm behind you.
Speaker 2 (38:10):
Oh, let's twist it like this.
Speaker 6 (38:11):
Think about how much they went through the day before
they pulled you over, before they talked to you or
somebody somebody broke that down to me, because I'm like, man,
why every time you run into like law for it's
like always It's like they said, Well, think about how
many bad people that they had to run into to
run into a good person.
Speaker 1 (38:30):
So they sometimes can't tell who who.
Speaker 2 (38:33):
They can't tell.
Speaker 6 (38:33):
Who because they you know, we all they looking at
us like we all look the same, so we don't
know what you own, you know.
Speaker 5 (38:39):
What I'm saying. And on top of that day underpaid,
you know what.
Speaker 1 (38:43):
I mean, that's fact getting started on that they show.
Speaker 5 (38:47):
Up broke and man, it's all bad.
Speaker 2 (38:52):
All right.
Speaker 4 (38:53):
So I want you guys to promote your company, your
mental health therapy company.
Speaker 1 (39:02):
Let's talk about it. Let's let's go into it.
Speaker 3 (39:05):
So we got a couple of things going on right now.
So you can find me on Psychology Today www. Dye
psychologytoday dot com. My name is Terrell Tipper, and what
my private practice is focused on is actually breaking down
the stigma that's attached to mental health in the black community.
Speaker 5 (39:26):
So if I had to, like, you know, choose a niche,
it would be people who was.
Speaker 3 (39:32):
Like me when I was growing up, Like I grew
up in a you know, typical scenario for the for
the hood, you know what I'm saying. Like my mom
was murdered when I was six, went to low uh,
you know, it's life, but I definitely appreciate that, went
to live with my grandmama. And my grandma was like
(39:53):
she was she was a saint, you know what I'm saying.
Like she was a beauty shop owner. And I don't
know if you'll ever been in a the shop, but
it's similar to the barbershop where people just come in
and just unload on. So I was like, damn, Like
my my grandmama is like a literal therapist, Like you
don't got no credentials for it. But I knew it
(40:15):
was serious when my friends start bypassing my room and
going to my grandma room, like, hey, bro, I need
to talk to your grandmama.
Speaker 5 (40:21):
I'm stressed.
Speaker 3 (40:23):
I'm like, for real, I thought you came over here
to hoop, like, but it was one of them things
where it's like you either blessed with it or you ain't,
and it's like you cannot turn that off.
Speaker 5 (40:37):
It's crazy.
Speaker 3 (40:38):
I could be going through whatever and somebody, I don't
know if you like, what's up?
Speaker 6 (40:41):
Bro?
Speaker 5 (40:41):
What's your name? Man? You you? Oh that's your oh man?
Speaker 3 (40:45):
My my uncle's is twins and they did this and
did that, and my daddy.
Speaker 5 (40:49):
I'm like, bro, I don't want to know your whole
life story. I just met you. Today.
Speaker 3 (40:53):
But it's something I guess it's written on my face
where I actually care about people, you know what I'm
saying and what they going through and if it's something
that I could give you that can help you through
that scenario. Like I said, I don't think you get
to choose that. I think that kind of chooses you. Yeah,
I agree with that. Another thing that we're working on
(41:13):
to us would s be global and that's how we met.
Speaker 5 (41:15):
Y'all.
Speaker 2 (41:15):
Yo, say what's up?
Speaker 5 (41:19):
Say these what's up.
Speaker 3 (41:20):
But at the end of the day, it's like, for
a long time we were helping one person at a time,
which was great and it was paying the bills. But
in order to reach the masses, we kind of be
I feel like we need to be a little bit.
Speaker 5 (41:33):
More in the mainstream so that the platform.
Speaker 1 (41:36):
You're one of the biggest ones right now.
Speaker 3 (41:39):
So you know what I'm saying, you forty one, I'm
forty one. We grew up in a time where you
didn't really just put the camera on you all day
every day.
Speaker 5 (41:47):
You know what I mean. You didn't just broadcast everything.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
You hated that.
Speaker 5 (41:52):
I'm just like.
Speaker 3 (41:53):
Feminine and not masculine, Like, why are you taking pictures
all day, every day are.
Speaker 5 (42:01):
But real.
Speaker 3 (42:02):
But now it's like we have to embrace that now,
Like if you not on Instagram and it's a free platform,
it's like you behind.
Speaker 1 (42:14):
The time and you leave some money on the table too.
Speaker 3 (42:18):
It's funny you said there, So what I was, what
I was noticing is just like you said back in
the day, if somebody pulled a camera and start filming you.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
Like cops like you doing.
Speaker 3 (42:30):
But now it's almost like like you said, you're leaving
money on the table if you're not publicizing what you're doing.
You know what I'm saying, Like like you said, it
could be I could be working with a little Johnny
on anger management and he might get through his scenario.
Speaker 5 (42:45):
But if it was on Instagram.
Speaker 3 (42:47):
Or on ball er Alert on whatever, it could be
fifty little Johnny's.
Speaker 4 (42:51):
Yeah, this is one thing of one thing I've learned
about content. It's replayable, you know, and especially if it's
really good content, meaningful and authentic, it lasts a very
very long time. I can tell you, man, some people
are arguing right now in the comments on my page
and me and this guy was just talking about the
three top three malls in Atlanta.
Speaker 1 (43:12):
He was like, I don't even go to the mall.
Speaker 4 (43:14):
So we get in comments of people say yeah, I'm
with BT, I don't shop at the mall. And I
got people people saying, why the hell you said, stone
crass mall?
Speaker 5 (43:20):
For all right, I'm over here.
Speaker 1 (43:22):
I like sneakers.
Speaker 4 (43:23):
They got fifty sneaker stores, and that's in that thirty
jewelers stores.
Speaker 1 (43:29):
It's suitable for me.
Speaker 5 (43:30):
Anyway.
Speaker 4 (43:31):
I shadn't say it's content and it's continuing to go.
But I feel like, you guys, man, we gotta figure
this out because.
Speaker 6 (43:37):
We definitely gonna we definitely gonna do a part two, three,
four five.
Speaker 2 (43:41):
See, yeah, we're gon We're gonna.
Speaker 1 (43:43):
This is essential.
Speaker 4 (43:45):
You guys are essential workers, Yes, telling you bro, anything
with the mod like you guys, trainers like the good ones.
Of course, in the gym, I was talking to my
man Jay Rock. Since I got disciplined with my fitness
and my mental health, I feel so wealthy. This don't
got nothing to do with money, bro. I can literally
(44:07):
look at somebody and be like, yeah, you fucked up,
But it's got.
Speaker 5 (44:10):
Nothing to do with money.
Speaker 1 (44:12):
You got, you got some other shit going on.
Speaker 4 (44:15):
I'm cool, because I can navigate mentally through whatever, because
I said boundaries, I'm working out, I'm getting, I'm getting
all my ship off, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 6 (44:25):
How damn you know, sometimes I'll be having days, but
you know what, I do realize that like a lot
of times, uh, people might be rich financially, but people
ain't rich in spiriting. And you can see it on
people's faces all the time. I see hundreds of people
a day and you might be like, why does this
person act like this, and like they mind ain't right,
(44:47):
you know, and you can't. And I learned you can't
match energy.
Speaker 5 (44:52):
You can't because it's too many, it's too many to
try to match.
Speaker 3 (44:55):
I feel like I feel like financial being financially set,
that that skill set is totally opposite from being good.
Speaker 5 (45:06):
In the head.
Speaker 1 (45:08):
We will do that part two.
Speaker 6 (45:09):
That's all.
Speaker 2 (45:11):
Listen, listen, we're gonna bring y'all that.
Speaker 5 (45:14):
We're gonna bring yaf that lot.
Speaker 4 (45:18):
Our cameras running out to So yeah, boy, that's the
whole things that.
Speaker 3 (45:22):
Make you mentally sound work against you, show man. You
know what I mean, Like most folks that got the
most money.
Speaker 2 (45:29):
That I know, oh man, oh man.
Speaker 5 (45:32):
Wait and yes, people around stop.
Speaker 4 (45:36):
Stop stop, we got we gotta definitely do a part
two three four tell them how to follow.
Speaker 5 (45:41):
You follow me on Instagram.
Speaker 1 (45:43):
Uh, y'all got separate Instagram right, So.
Speaker 3 (45:48):
My Instagram is Tip Life T e P Underscore Life
with a Y and minus.
Speaker 5 (45:53):
Talk to Tip t A l K the number two
T E P. A.
Speaker 6 (45:58):
You're a big shout out to s B Global and
Global Talent Agency.
Speaker 2 (46:02):
Man, we thought to do a part too.
Speaker 5 (46:04):
Don't work mental health is real. We appreciate y'all.
Speaker 6 (46:12):
HM,
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