April 24, 2025 • 48 mins
Thursday (pt 2 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, Marci presents evidence that her family’s ‘travel curse’ is hereditary.. - Hoyt and the Jr. Nation Band have a diddy entitled “The Night Ray Stevens Came to Town”.. - Col. Brewster, our Poet Laureate will stand on a hill and deliver his latest work, “The Tesla Trap”.. - Doug Rice is back from NASCAR’s week off with a report on what to expect this weekend at Talladega Superspeedway.. - Ike Turner has some advice for attending the Prom.. - We’ll fill a listener request to hear Oliver’s commentary on John Boy’s dog, Pearl.. - and we’ll finish up with the Mayor of Dismal Seepage…
℗®© 2025 John Boy & Billy, Inc.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
Good morning. That's a Big Show on the radio. Thursday,
April twenty fourth. Our feature track from The Big Show.
Bit Boxer mayor a dismal Seabit's Greek Festival. That's the keywords,
Greek festival. Hit the Big Box at the Big Show
dot com. Click out on their contest Bundy can't get there, We'll.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Call you Yon'll play game.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Do it like this?
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Then let's be my contestant, will beat the blonde happens
to be a man of a Southeast Tennessee known as Roberts.
Good morning, Robert.
Speaker 4 (01:00):
Get drawing and John Boy, you that way man.
Speaker 1 (01:03):
As awesome as can be. Hope you're all right? You
sound good?
Speaker 4 (01:09):
Yes, sir.
Speaker 5 (01:10):
It's rain and lock and jungle over in East Tennessee
and uh excavating.
Speaker 4 (01:15):
Thing going on.
Speaker 5 (01:16):
So I got a rainy tail.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
One nice that buddy saying that cab glad to got
sales service there. Let's uh, let's see if you can
get two bells before two buzzers and get this big
old prize by one hundred and twenty dollars worth of
bulls not cleaning products, right.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Yeah, because nobody ever wants a cab when it's raining.
Speaker 1 (01:36):
Cabin the excavator stand off kind of keep up with
the man they're talking over here, right.
Speaker 5 (01:41):
With that right driver Mac truck and a Peterbilt truck
that will come in very easifull.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Alright, good right, we got it going on. All right,
let's see if you can get inside the Marcy's hanghead, Marcie,
let's go to Denmark. We've been talking about traveling all
over the world on let's put that on my map. Well,
in Denmark, if you looked up and saw a stork
on your roof, it would mean you were gonna have something.
Speaker 6 (02:11):
What target practice, You're gonna have some good luck.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
You will have good luck if you see a stork
on your roof in Denmark, Robert, agree or disagree.
Speaker 4 (02:27):
I'd say you're a child.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Ah, so you're thinking the old stork in Denmark saying
you go have a baby. So are you disagreeing with
Marcy's answer? Yes, sir, Oh she was actually right. Good luck?
Speaker 4 (02:46):
Oh my goodness.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
Yeah, Danes even build nests to attract them. So yeah,
you know you you're thinking, all right, there are not
stupid enough to believe the baby deal.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
But then.
Speaker 7 (02:58):
They got big nests on her on the roof again.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Robert Let's they won't get your bail right here? Hater?
What classic seventies TV show had a theme song featuring
the lyrics love is all around, No need to waste it.
You're gonna make it after all?
Speaker 6 (03:17):
Oh you're it's the Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
I don't think you watched the show.
Speaker 4 (03:32):
I love you, honey, but not as much as I
love Jackie. I'm gonna have to disagree with you.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
I think she was kidding. Okay, it's nice to know
where you sand love ladder because.
Speaker 6 (03:46):
You have here just continuing with the Mard curse. Sure,
my answer is the Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
That's okay. Well, okay, well he disagreed, and that was
the thing to do, as it was not dead with
the you know what it was really? Of course, it
was the Mary Tyler Moore show.
Speaker 6 (04:08):
I to back.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
No, that was an ethel Merman show. Didn't quite make it. Okay, yeah,
this gun they did like nine versions of it.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
It didn't get better.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
All right, Well, let's uh, let's say we can get
robertsprize packer bell would do that. A buzzer would not,
According to a screener of movies intended for airline play.
They checked for and edit out three things extreme violence,
sex scenes, and what else.
Speaker 6 (04:46):
My desire to see it.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
I don't tell you what.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
I have to agree.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
They do edit that stuff out. They also take out sile.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
Sex and violence, sex and nudity.
Speaker 5 (05:06):
Yes, all right, Robert, here we talking about.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
The Central States. This is for airline place.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
For airline travel. They edit the movies out. You know,
they edit violence, outs and sex, and Taylor says nudity.
Speaker 5 (05:27):
All right, then I'll agree with Tay.
Speaker 1 (05:29):
Okay, Well, I'm gonna go ahead and let you have
that for the wind behind it said sex, and then
that kind of goes along with nudity. But the the
other hands we're looking for is offensive language, is what
they edited. All right, so offensive langue? All right?
Speaker 5 (05:49):
What you need, Robert, I'm fifty eight, and I can't
remember the last time I listened to you.
Speaker 4 (05:56):
The first time you all the time, and I listened
here for years and years year, and uh okay, I
need to shout out my brother.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Okay, all right, well Robert, pick it up. You might
have a day off, but I got stuff to do,
so let's let's.
Speaker 3 (06:19):
All right.
Speaker 5 (06:20):
I'm gonna shout out to my boss Michael Daily on
the young man twenty seven year old running a million
dollar company here in Tennessee doing uh excavation works, many
many peaches of heavy equipment, dump trucks.
Speaker 4 (06:39):
And heavy howards.
Speaker 5 (06:40):
Oh right, well he's got a bunch of great guys
working for him.
Speaker 3 (06:45):
Man.
Speaker 4 (06:45):
My other shout is, hey, Jackie, Baby, I love you, honey.
Speaker 6 (06:50):
No one could see that one coming.
Speaker 1 (06:52):
Alright, got corner you, Robert. I'm looking you with it
right now, Bardie, bring jad you listen man bottom for
the hour top of your knews talking about promise season.
(07:15):
My accent, I oh yeah, it happens right on the
other side of your report.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
H m hm.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
H m.
Speaker 7 (07:36):
Hm, h.
Speaker 6 (07:42):
M hmmm.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
Good morning, Ben shows on the radio. It's time too.
I was like, yo, what's up.
Speaker 7 (08:05):
Welcome to ax Ike, the place to go for all
the four one one you need for all your uh
uh what you call Meldon Micosio relationshrimps. Dig this dear Ike.
This girl that I have known for a long time
has asked me to her senior prom. So me, being
the nice guy that I am, said yes. I never
(08:28):
went to my prom when I was in school, so
I don't know how to make this a special night
for her. So I'm writing you to get your advice.
Can you help me out please, Sincerely, Confuzzled Greenbrier, Tennessee.
Dear Fuzzy, I can tell by the way that you
(08:50):
write that you is very white. But that's all right.
Don't get up tight or fuss off, fight or loose
sleep at night. I gonna help you with your problem.
The whole night will be the bomb. You'll even please
her mom. So o hell with it.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
I can't keep it a bit.
Speaker 7 (09:12):
Yes, I can help you. Let me preach on no
that that that that now Confuzzle. This would been much
easier for Ike if and you was asking how to
stalkerate your new bride, young prom date like you was
a sleek, deadly uh what you call King Kobe Brazil
invading the nest full of them tasted juicy little mongolooses.
(09:35):
I got fags of advice, all that kind of stuff.
But if you think about it, those cats don't need advice.
They already got their game planning on the big board.
It's dudes like you that need to low down. And
I must confess to it. Your letter has touched Ike's heart.
I want you to know that you is up for
mac Daddy other year for agreeing to take your ugly
(09:58):
friend to the problem. I know you didn't say she
was ugly, but since everybody everybody knows that the good
looking girls all get asked out early, the real skaged
Bernard's got to go ask their gay friends and cousins
to take along. And since you didn't say nothing about
the two of you being relationated, sounds like you might
(10:21):
be more kanfuzzled about just the prom not to mention
the fact you go around using words like confuzzled. But
I'll give you the beneficial of the doubt. Now let's
get at he ifing you wants to make this a
special knot, don't do what the rest of her pale
born classmates are doing. Renting a tux is played brother.
(10:45):
Cruise over to the cool side of town and find
out where the pimps dress for success. Deck your own
self out in some bright red or lime green waistcoat
and slacks with that matching tie shoes in Derby like
they went to olden crowd on Sunday. Let her know
what color so she won't clash. Let them other rednecks
(11:06):
have the fashion disaster, and when it comes to getting
your ride on. Remember limos is for layme ods. Nothing
more pitiful than a bunch of crackers in the dumb
and dumber past the tuxedo pulling all that money so
thirty of them can squeeze into a four passenger limo.
They pull up, open the door and they just keep
(11:28):
climbing out. Man, one after another, looks like a damn
clown within. Just pimp your own ride with some neon
running lights of one of them big bass wolfers in
the trunk and pull up to the door with the
beat just shaking the shingles man, and when you tie
it on the feedback. This is one time to pass
on the viaenias. Show a little class and take that
(11:51):
sweet lady of yalls straight to a finer dining establishment
and use your head man.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
The drive through is for losers. Go inside.
Speaker 7 (12:04):
And pay full price. If she catches you using coupons,
you could forget that good night grabbing giggle. Follow these
simple rules and you do yourself proud. Well. I hope
this does the trick. Don't worry yourself sick. Just remember
to act slick, be cool to your chick, and don't
(12:26):
act like a prude.
Speaker 8 (12:28):
Oh yeah, dip dodge, duck diving dogs five thiet and
don't go acting on rude or I'm telling you, dude,
she'll never get nude.
Speaker 7 (12:42):
You'll have to go home and get stewed. Or the
worst might come to pass. She'll take you out in
the grass and in front of the whole class, she
might break her foot off in your ass.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
You knew that, you knew I was coming.
Speaker 7 (12:56):
I had to work that in this someway. This is I.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
You want to axy like mal to exact, John Boyn
Bill A p O Box one nine one one one,
Charlotte and Ce two eight two one nine. Good morning,
(13:37):
that's a big show on the radio. Well, the weather
is heating up, and so is a big movie release
schedule for the summer. And as usual, nothing gets by
a resident critic. Let's welcome back, Rabbi myren Bergstein show,
Owe me, homie, what's happening? How are you? Rabbi?
Speaker 3 (13:55):
Hot?
Speaker 7 (13:56):
It's getting warm outside the couple of days and then
ninety What the hell do you do with spring?
Speaker 1 (14:02):
You're fast.
Speaker 7 (14:05):
I can't step outside without making gravy. Give me a
damn break here, I'm eighty years old. No mouth, parwa
your dumbass. You can always move up north one then
give up show business.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
So I guess you've been been to the movie.
Speaker 7 (14:22):
No, I come in here for the stimulating conversation and
the off chance that Marsie shows up without a taco.
And again I'm a loser as usual.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
Of course I.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
Went to the movie, all right, So what you see?
Speaker 7 (14:35):
I would be happy to tell you if you would
shut the hell up for two seconds.
Speaker 3 (14:40):
Now.
Speaker 7 (14:40):
My great grandkids bugged me to take them with me,
so I had to see something kid friendly in quotation marks,
I wanted to see that movie about the Last Supper,
but they wanted to see Snow White.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Did you go snow Way?
Speaker 7 (14:56):
So I told him to pick something else. And they
wanted to see this mind shaft movie Minecraft. That don't
make no sense? The title, no, the movie, Oh what
a mess. Here's what the press release says. A mysterious
portal posts four misfits into the overworld, a bizarre Cubic wonderland.
(15:17):
The Trive's on imagination to get back home, they'll have
the master the terrain whilein Balkan on a magical quest
with an unexpected.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
Craft named Steve.
Speaker 7 (15:29):
Sounds interesting, except it isn't It's like Wizard of Oz
for lazy, stupid people, except everything in this oz is square.
For some reason, it's based on some video game. Oh well,
so now it makes perfect sense. That's why it's craft.
How the actors, well, I think I can shum it
up with one word. Nah, didn't know, Oh you speak
(15:51):
the kids lingo.
Speaker 1 (15:54):
I didn't know you were hit to that scene.
Speaker 7 (15:57):
I didn't know hardly anyone in it except for that
awkward guy from the Superhero Stuff not his best vike.
But if I had to pick a bright spot in
a dull, dumb movie, it would be that funny fat
guy from Natcho Mama and Karate Teddy Ben Jack Nicholson.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
Jack Black. The actor you're thinking of is Jack Black.
Speaker 7 (16:18):
I thought that was the actor whose face was so
leathery he looked like a catchers mitt.
Speaker 1 (16:23):
U's Jack Palance.
Speaker 7 (16:26):
I thought that was the guy who could look left
and right at the same time, us Jack Alum. I
thought that was.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
The love boat guy us Jack Jones.
Speaker 7 (16:36):
I thought that was the show where friends sat around
slapping each other in the crunches.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
U's Jackass.
Speaker 7 (16:44):
I thought that was the guy with the beautiful hair
that said book him, Danny Boy.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
That's Jack Lord.
Speaker 7 (16:49):
I thought that was the clown and the dunts hat
kind to sell me a breaker us Jack in the box.
I thought that was the guy with the orange skin
that only works one day in October.
Speaker 1 (17:00):
Jack o'lanlorn. So who the hell am I thinking? Jack Black? Oh?
Speaker 2 (17:06):
What a kiss on that guy?
Speaker 7 (17:07):
More creases on his face than Liberachi's chinos.
Speaker 1 (17:12):
What are you?
Speaker 7 (17:12):
I think he never heard a sunblocker moisturizer. He was
beef jerkie and a stetson O.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
The movie.
Speaker 7 (17:18):
Ah well, I give it one and a half yamaka,
mostly because I like the aqua guy. I don't know
you might have a different opinion. I mean, if you
live in your mother's basement and play games all day
and move food like a bum, I'm sure this is
your favorite movie of the year. But for guys like me,
I need more. See I read books. Maybe you heard
(17:40):
of them. It's like a whole movie in your head.
I don't need Fat Night or Mario injected into my
veins like some sort of cyber junkie. But you, your bastard.
You got no taste, no education, no clue. You are
society's brighten and a shame to your parents. Don't a
oil the favorite, and don't great. We don't need any
(18:01):
more stupid deadbeats. We're full of the fix you for
five bucks, your bastard, I'm paying, but it is possible
that I could be wrong.
Speaker 9 (18:15):
Go in peace, but be.
Speaker 7 (18:16):
Sure to see him at name. It's cheaper, y'all, bastard.
Speaker 1 (18:24):
Good morning, you got the big show on the radio.
More chances you to win coming up after your news
weathers barts.
Speaker 9 (18:30):
I stand on the hill, but not for a thrill,
for the breath of a fresh keel. And never mind
the man who contemplates doing away with license plates. He
stands alone anyhow, Bacon the cookies of discontent, by the
heat of the longer man.
Speaker 1 (18:52):
Leaving this sword.
Speaker 9 (18:55):
And then like in Portrago dot dot you know, kind
of host set up.
Speaker 10 (19:00):
Leaving a soul hot in the waters of the Medulla
Oblonga with John Boy and Billy on the Big show,
like that with John Boy.
Speaker 1 (19:49):
Good morning, Big shows on the radio. And this is
your twenty four hour alert, John Boys wonderful Thing number
one hundred and thirty nine, Gobby the Talking record for girls,
and now ready my mess Rosemary Roy was on twelve
inch final. You have a shy girl and a record player.
This is a wonderful thing for you. I'm sorry that
(20:15):
a shy girl the record player.
Speaker 2 (20:18):
That's like the worst pickup line ever.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
Well, I got to explain it when I had the
talking record for boys, you know, like shy kids as
an interactive out record as you go back and forth,
you know, bring them out, you know, the talking birds
and stuff. Oh yeah, before the rats. I'm with you,
man is making fun of kids doing that?
Speaker 2 (20:44):
Yeah, I just told you. But you know, don't you
have any real kittens for your kittens?
Speaker 1 (20:51):
They liked old days were your family, girl on the farm,
and he was all there with the kids. He doesn't practice.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
I gotta say, kids in the old days got out
and met more other kids than they do today.
Speaker 9 (21:05):
But I'm not gonna argue with.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
You about my wonderful day. Good in the sakes man. Anyway,
y'all check it out. I ain't gonna force it on you.
If you won't. What's your name and the hat little
announce it in twenty more hours from right now. That's
all right with Randy Good Morning, got the Bag Show
on the radio coming up. We play wordy word for
a big old prize pack from Law Tigers. We got
(21:29):
some cool swag from the Tigers plus a twenty five
dollars gas card motorcycle lawyers who ride as Low Tigers
representing injured riders over two decades with Lord Tigers. You'll
never ride along. Click on the link at the Big
Show dot Com find out more, Hang on play more
than minutes. Right now, it's time for Tater Tainma News
(21:53):
and here's our girl, Marcy tater More. Hello, boy, bye bye, Hey.
Speaker 6 (21:58):
Justin Bieber's in the news. Bieber's been in the tabloids
all of his life, but lately because he's looking very
thin and people are saying, spreading rumors that maybe he's
into the drugs. Maybe not. Others are saying, like the
Hollywood Reporter, that his relationships, mental health, church, and finances
are all up in the air, all right. His reps
(22:19):
responded by denying that Bieber is deep in debt. He said,
they said, quote.
Speaker 1 (22:23):
Like he can't afford to eat, and.
Speaker 6 (22:27):
They're saying that basically, the tabloids are always trying to
picture an, you know, paint and unflattering picture of justice Peter.
If he is financially overstretched. It's due to the cancelation
of the Justice Tour and his massive real estate holdings.
Speaker 2 (22:42):
According to the Reporter.
Speaker 6 (22:43):
They claim that Bieber still owes around twenty million from
the canceled tour that he did a couple of years ago.
He's also overspent on six mansions and the renovations in
Beverly Hills, Palm Springs and Idaho.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
How do you know, Well, most of the has went
to like a fire pole and a water slide that.
Speaker 6 (23:04):
He had to grow up with all those all those millions.
Last summer, Justin Bieber cut ties with his inner circle.
This is another speculation that that's the reason why he's
in trouble, including his security chief, his manager Scooter Braun,
who we all know is not the best guy. And
Scooter had a deputy, so he cut ties with him.
So Bieber now manages himself do it myself, and it's
(23:26):
having mixed results. According to the reporter. He relies greatly
on his spiritual advisor, Pastor Judah Smith of the non
denominational church Home is the church that he belongs to,
according to the Hollywood Reporter, and he also had a baby,
so maybe the baby's keeping him up. Not him, but
his wife had a baby, so like a hell just
thirty early thirties. Yeah, he's early thirties. I think he's
(23:50):
been famous since he was like fifteen sixteen. Was found
on YouTube.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
That's right.
Speaker 6 (23:55):
Yeah, just worried about the boy hey relationship news. Over
Easter weekend, they went official with their uh social media
Elizabeth Hurley is dating. Just take a guess, anyone, Drivis
CalCon No, No, Billy Ray Cyrus.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
Billy Ray, Cyrus, Billy photographic proof.
Speaker 6 (24:18):
Okay, hold on one moment, heart there they are right there.
Speaker 7 (24:25):
I had it.
Speaker 6 (24:26):
So the couple who met while filming the twenty twenty
two holiday movie Christmas in Paradise shared this photo on
Instagram showing them looking on Lovy dov.
Speaker 1 (24:36):
I was witch well, Billy dark hair, go back to
the mullet, Billy Ray, come on mate and give.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
Me ten minutes. I'd put John Boy in there.
Speaker 1 (24:47):
You know, photo shot with Billy Ray.
Speaker 7 (24:51):
Yeah, they captured the photo.
Speaker 6 (24:53):
Happy Easter with a big ol'heart emoji.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Elizabeth Hurley. So that's the one that would play in
the romantic comedies, would like.
Speaker 6 (25:00):
Right, Yeah, she was in bedazzled. She's the British actress
who was tied to Hugh Grant until Hugh Grant got
in all his little trouble with.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
What happened to he.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
Was all hooked up with her, dude stepping out on
this somewhere.
Speaker 6 (25:24):
Serena Williams has denied that her Super Bowl crip walk
at the halftime show was to drag a former boyfriend, Drake.
You know, it wasn't about him, she said, it was.
I would never do that, she said. Obviously I can
see how someone would think that, but absolutely not. I
have never had negative feelings towards him. That was the
Time magazine.
Speaker 1 (25:43):
And I missed the first part of that him.
Speaker 6 (25:47):
That's no, that's just to drag. Means that I wasn't
doing that to you know.
Speaker 1 (25:53):
What was she doing?
Speaker 6 (25:53):
She did the crip walk. You watched the whole halftime show, right,
and so Kendrick Lamar had those little lines that not
like us, and and was there was that whole Drake
you know reference in the song and they were out
and then they turned to her and she's doing the
crip walk, and so everyone was speculating because we had
no had no format to follow.
Speaker 1 (26:13):
About like why Justin Bieber is skinny something like.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
That, the same their job.
Speaker 1 (26:22):
All right. By the way, in my defense, I was
using the bathroom during half time of the Super Bowl,
like most think, I missed that much.
Speaker 6 (26:30):
Yeah right, And Nate Bergatzi will host the Emmy Awards
on CBS that happens in September, so he has been
tagged to host that show.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Yeah, all right, thank you very much for that.
Speaker 2 (26:49):
Don't drag me.
Speaker 1 (26:50):
Now do the crib walk, cra cra. Well, let's get
us a winner. That's why we already were here. We
go one eight hundred big show. We're getting a couple
of contestants and play next. Good morning, it's a big
(27:30):
show on the radio. Road it through your Thursday feature
tracking the Big Show? Bid bok mayor does one see bit?
Greek festivals? Now get it more before we get out
of here. Classic. We got a request a bit coming
up in just a few minutes. Let's see what happens
with our game right now at everybody's head, I bout
(27:51):
my bed.
Speaker 3 (27:51):
Okay, the word the word, any word.
Speaker 1 (27:54):
Let's meet our contestants. We got cameraon from Irwin, Tennessee.
Good morning camera, Good morning, john boy, well, good money.
Let's see we got Frank out of Adamsville, Tennessee. Good morning, Frank, Hey,
John boy, first time amend. All right, couple of Tennessee
(28:16):
boys going at it. How about that? Every one against Adamsville.
So Tater, how about you take Frank? Okay, I take Cameron?
Speaker 8 (28:25):
Right?
Speaker 1 (28:27):
All right, boys, let's see what we're gonna do. Frank,
you relax me and Cameron for the first thirty seconds,
all ran are these random words? Random words? All right, Cameron?
Are you ready?
Speaker 3 (28:39):
I'm ready?
Speaker 1 (28:41):
Okay, start the clock. Now, see what month it is.
Look on the calendar. Uh huh too? Blank and forget?
I I begive, yes, okay, I offer a hundred dollars
blank for that criminal bill No, one hundred dollars? What if? No,
(29:04):
if you bring in the criminal back in the Old West,
five hundred dollars blank is offered? No another word?
Speaker 10 (29:16):
Good?
Speaker 1 (29:17):
All right? Okay, Well let's go back. We gotta gotta
clear up some stuff. So, Jaggie, what were you talking about?
The word was forgive? You said? And I said forget? Okay,
But that classic to forget and forgive. That's correct, don't
you know? Don't aren't we a little lenient when we
do classic sayings, what now your score keep I'll just
(29:40):
try it, all right, one to one after round one?
All right, Frank, you got one sitting there. Let's leave
what you and Taylor can do reward? Yeah, wait till
I started? Okay, alright, ready go yeah, reward?
Speaker 6 (29:58):
All right, Hey, be good to this. These people that
live next door to you, they're what, huh you the
season is cold and it's snowing? What season is it?
Speaker 2 (30:10):
You ask?
Speaker 6 (30:11):
Stop and ask for a blank? When you're lost direction.
This is a big word for meaning you're in a
fight with somebody. Uh, there's a blank going on in Iraq.
There's a.
Speaker 3 (30:27):
Fire. Five.
Speaker 1 (30:29):
So that's the one you leave me in camera and
to pick up. Yeah, alrighty, so what'd you all get?
Speaker 3 (30:38):
Five?
Speaker 1 (30:38):
Put a five on that one? No, a four on
the one, A total of five? All right, Cameron, me
and you against the world. Yeah, okay, we're picking up
on that last one. It's kind of a toughie, you
can see. But I think Tayor was on the right
track going over across seas where things are happening like that.
(30:58):
That's where that's where uh oh here, but no, nothing's
jumping in my head. So I guess we'll just go
ahead and start ready, go okay, another word for war
a small? Uh No, that's just part of a war.
(31:18):
Uh it's a small blank Okay. Let me let me
go another way. Remember that movie with what's his name from?
Raised in Arizona? Blank air, blank air. It was it
was like prisoners. Yes, yeah, all right, there's that's the
first syllable of that. No, but a con, remember con,
(31:39):
it's not there's a con.
Speaker 3 (31:44):
Let me.
Speaker 1 (31:46):
Okay, Frank has already won the game.
Speaker 3 (31:49):
Five.
Speaker 1 (31:52):
Let's let's see Frank, do you know the word trying
to get.
Speaker 2 (31:58):
Some congreg but I can't.
Speaker 5 (32:00):
I can't get it.
Speaker 7 (32:03):
What what was that? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (32:09):
Flick yeah, conflict? Alright, I cauldn't get it. I couldn't
get it. All right, that's all right. Let's just go
ahead and move on and never mention this game again. Cameron,
you can try again, buddy, Frank, you got you long
Tiger's prize back headed over. Appreciate you all boys, Hang on,
(32:32):
Good morning, Big shows on the radio. Bit request time.
Tim Catherine out of Greenville, South Carolina, says, A JB.
It's not too soon. Can we hear Oliver talk about
your dog pearl from my request. Thank you and sorry
for you lost buddy. Thank you so much, Tim, appreciate
you and thanks a bunch of you big show listeners.
For the John Boy and Billy facebook page, there's a
(32:54):
link to that lapse of love deal that took care
of a pearl and it's like a sight and y'all
are leaving messages. It's really cool, man. It's neat to
look back and say, you think about that pearl. I mean,
you know, coming to work with me being on a
big show for fifteen years. Man, A lot of y'all
and the ones that didn't meet very vocal vocal. All right, Tim,
(33:17):
we got your request. Buddy coming up next Good morning,
(33:44):
and that's a big show on the radio. Jack just
had me a note. Cameron, my partner on Wordy Work,
wants to give a shout out to Dwayne Sparks. That's his,
his buddy who listens to wordy Word every day. Do
nothing one wordy words of Ah, Dwayne, you know your
(34:05):
body there, Cameron ghost Heaven knows it wasn't my fault,
never never.
Speaker 11 (34:15):
Any way for a jety buddy, you tell that the
day Cameron whippreciate you well, Ah, did, but I request
tam kay, they're out of Greenville, South Carolina.
Speaker 1 (34:27):
Here you go, tell it is time for Oliver. Well, well, well.
Speaker 7 (34:38):
One of the reasons this show is so popular is
because our listeners consider all of us part of their
extended family, and all of us here consider one another
a big family. So let's just set here and be
a family. That's enough of that crap. Each of us
has an individual qui and idiosyncrasies that from time to
(35:02):
time gets on the other family members nerves, but we
generally overlook it in the name of peace and harmony
in the family unit. But there comes a time when
conditions become unbearable and someone must step forward and say
something to the offending party.
Speaker 1 (35:23):
Oh I don't like where this is going.
Speaker 7 (35:25):
And since the rest of you gutlass jackasses haven't got
the stones to speak up, I do take a number.
I guess I'll have to do it. So John boy
On behalf of the entire Big Show cast and crew,
May I say, we have all had a royal.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
Buttload of your damn dog.
Speaker 7 (35:52):
Let me preach on it now. It's painfully obvious why
you and Pearl get along so well. That old adage
about how dogs and their masters begin to resemble each other.
Couldn't be more appropriate in this circumstance. That same vacant
stare when you're being spoken to, eating out of the garbage,
(36:15):
can those mystery stains on your fur, whinding at the
door when you're left outside too long, barking at Randy,
and of course dragging your ass on the carpet. Ever
(36:38):
since that mentally deranged mongrel has set foot in the studio,
things have gone down hill. Brother, You're already questionable work ethic.
I can't even say that without laughing. Has dipped off
the radar. You've started to rely on the dog for
(36:58):
all your material. I remember the good old days when
he used to have those Thomas Edison stories right and left.
And I gotta be honest that where's your froggy stuff?
Is so fifteen minutes ago? And speaking of froggy, do
you have any idea how gay you sound doing all
(37:20):
that baby talk? You're so cute, Yes you are. You're
a little angel, just a perfect little angel. Dad you love, Yes,
he does, see what I mean. I want to hit
myself in the head with a hammer. Enough already, it's
only been a month and she's already got your wearing pink.
(37:42):
You let her run wild anywhere she wants to go,
like those liberal parents who let their obnoxious, ill bred
kid terrorize other families in a restaurant and then just
look on blithely like it's just the cutest thing they've
ever seen. What that kid really needs is a first
class not jerked in this tail, and so does that
damn dog.
Speaker 1 (38:03):
You need to man up, Skippy.
Speaker 7 (38:06):
Owning a dog is a big responsibility, Your responsibility, not
everyone else is, because whenever a disaster happens, you handle
the problem with your usual amazing mastery of the English language.
The dog peas on the carpet, Jackie Tata dog pee, Hell,
(38:29):
she shreds anything within reach, Jackie Tata stuff shredded hal
She jumps up on the table and steals food. You
gonna eat that now, it's not just the big show, gang.
Even your friends and family are ready to snap. You
took it to the beach, and after two days, Captain
(38:49):
Kit was at the tackle shop trying to find a
hook she'd fit on. Poor little Coach Cobs, Poor little coach.
She mistook him for a chew toy and ran around
the farm with him in her mouth, And it didn't
help that every time she brought him back you kept
(39:10):
throwing him for her. Is that really how friends do
one another? Even your wife, your poor put upon life,
is at her wits end, As if being married to
you isn't enough of a challenge. Making her sit in
the back seat so Pearl can ride shotgun is going
(39:32):
too far? Why the missus was even willing to meet
you halfway? She was happy to let Pearl sleep in
the bed with you. She thought it was touching to
see Pearl sleeping with her head on your chest, until
she realized the other end would be in her face.
To be honest, after sleeping with you, that would seem
(39:52):
like a refreshing change of face to leave. And the chewing,
sweet fancy, I see Moses. The chewing. She's a weapon
of mass destruction with a fruity collar. You name it,
she'll chew it. Doorstops, chair legs, water bottles, purser's backpacks,
(40:14):
electrical cords, books, shoes, tater. You get the picture and
the paper this month is like a paper shredder with
a tail. Four hours in the studio and it's like
a ticket tape. Parade's been going on, So who's gonna
pay for all that? Let's just say forget the razors
(40:37):
next year, buy us some chew toys, you cheap bastard.
But to be fair, I guess Pearl has brought us
some bright moments on occasion. Well, I've never seen Terry
Hansen smile so much than the day Pearl ate that
biscuit off his lap, the time John Boy blamed Jackie
(41:01):
for one of Pearl's poots, And who could forget today
Pearl dropped a big old Cleveland steamer being in Rayford's office,
And be honest, who hasn't wanted to do that? Good times?
Speaker 1 (41:18):
But still it's not enough.
Speaker 7 (41:20):
We're sick of that, mutt. But you're the boss. You
want to keep bringing little puppy pain and he ask
to work and the immortal words of mean Gene. I
don't know what the hell we can do about it,
So go on, let her run your life, kiss a
fuzzy little butch of big dumb sap. Alienate your coworkers,
(41:41):
run off your friends, anger your family. You wouldn't be
the first guy whose life was ruined by some bitch.
Do you validate?
Speaker 1 (41:55):
I dought he's growing on good morning. That's a big
(42:24):
show on the radio, I know. And big show listener said,
got a mayor dismal Sepas albums man, He said, so
many weekend events like a double album by now if
you like this, this is keywords Greek festival. When you
hit the big box at the big show dot com. Well,
(42:45):
there's always something exciting happening in Dismal seep at South Carolina,
and you're to tell us all about it. As a
mayor himself, the honorable Merwin co fiddle swoop, Good morning,
mister mayor.
Speaker 3 (42:57):
Yeah, su Cary Merra, John boy.
Speaker 1 (43:00):
Are you just making clean on? Is this your way
of telling me you're having a star Trek convention?
Speaker 3 (43:05):
No, sorry to disappoint, that's hello. Good morning, John Boy
in Greek in honor of our first annual Dismal Seepage
Greeking Out Greek Festival.
Speaker 1 (43:15):
Oh got you that's great, first year, hun So what
made you decide to have a Greek festival?
Speaker 3 (43:21):
Oh yeah, there's a lot of contributing factors. We've done
just about every other nationality. It was down to a
toss up between Greece and Macedonia. Macedonia is just weird,
all they do is drive backwards and bet their paychecks
on sports. If I wanted to see that, I go
to Charleston.
Speaker 1 (43:39):
Does doesimal Seepage have a big Greek population?
Speaker 3 (43:43):
Oh no, we've got to truck him in from a
rental place.
Speaker 1 (43:46):
Hit a second, you're you're renting Greeks.
Speaker 3 (43:48):
You know there's a place in Georgia called we Reek
of Greek that's like a one stop shop for all
things Greek. I've got their business cards right here. Hold
on a second. Here it is when you're up a
creek without a Greek, don't freak, it's us you seek.
Speaker 1 (44:03):
Well, that is catchy. So what's on the docket for
the big weekend?
Speaker 3 (44:08):
Oh, we've got all the traditional Greek festival stuff, you know,
the food, the culture. Men with excess body hair and
one eyebrow, women with excess.
Speaker 1 (44:19):
Body hair and one eyebrow dancing.
Speaker 3 (44:23):
No, I'm sitting in my chair. Actually, no, no, no,
will you.
Speaker 1 (44:25):
Have Greek dancing?
Speaker 3 (44:27):
Oh? Why, thank you for reminding me, John boy. We've
actually gone one better. We've got the touring production of
the musical Grease.
Speaker 1 (44:37):
Well, how does that have anything to do with a
Greek festival? You know, that's all fifties music and rock
and roll.
Speaker 3 (44:46):
Well, it would be if it was spelled g r
e a s e. This, however, is spelled g r
e e ce like the Country. The all Greek version
of that show set in Greece in the fifties, and
it's even performed in Greek.
Speaker 1 (45:01):
How's that gonna go over?
Speaker 3 (45:04):
I'm sure it'll be fine. John Stamos is starring, so
all the house frozz will be there, you know, John, boy,
the Greeks were quite the athletes, so we're excited to
welcome Achilles Heels in an old woman Greco Roman wrestling exhibition,
just like in ancient times.
Speaker 1 (45:25):
You know, unless I'm mistaken, Greco Roman wrestling was done
in the nude.
Speaker 3 (45:31):
Oh well, my weekend just got better. And we've got
a couple of streets for the kiddos. Absorb of the Greek.
The human sponge will be on human sponge.
Speaker 1 (45:43):
So how's that work?
Speaker 3 (45:46):
Well, my understanding is he's like a roll of bounty
paper towels. He's a He's an old guy with extremely
dry skin, and apparently he just soaks up the water.
That's what happens when you don't moisturize. You gotta moisturize,
John boy.
Speaker 2 (46:00):
You moist your eyes.
Speaker 3 (46:01):
No, I'm straight. We've also got Gregorio's racing goats.
Speaker 1 (46:08):
Ah, kind of like the pig races we have in
our county fairs.
Speaker 3 (46:12):
Well, if the losers get eaten, that's exactly what.
Speaker 1 (46:15):
Well, speaking of food, I guess this is going to
be traditional Greek fair.
Speaker 3 (46:20):
Oh yeah, Bett's pie stuffed grape leaves, bahkla blah. And
we have a special eating contest Euro's.
Speaker 1 (46:27):
Gyro is it eros and Gyro's the same thing?
Speaker 3 (46:32):
Yes? And no, John boy, this is getting strapped into
one of those big gyroscopes you see at the fair,
and while it's spinning every which way, you have to
successfully eat a Euro. It's hilariously messy and not coincidentally,
it's located right next to the Greek porta potties.
Speaker 1 (46:51):
Greek porta potties you.
Speaker 3 (46:53):
Bet oops poopas they look like little parthenons. It's a door.
And we'll have a special ribbon cutting for Dismal Seepage's
newest eatery, Mister Nico Runtapopoulos will have the grand opening
of the newest Pizza Runt with a special appearance by
the pizza runt mascot himself.
Speaker 1 (47:14):
Hey, we know him, Ricky Sharp.
Speaker 3 (47:17):
Yeah, he's uh, he's quite a character. Yeah, not the
tallest sprout in the gardens. Did you know his pizza
run outfit is the size of an actual piece of pizza.
You know, I almost stepped on him a couple of times.
He kept yelling son of a and calling me a
cherry picker. Whatever that?
Speaker 1 (47:36):
Well those are his catch phrases.
Speaker 3 (47:38):
Ah, I see. Well, I hope he makes it back
in time for the festival.
Speaker 1 (47:42):
Well where did it go?
Speaker 3 (47:44):
Long story? I was trying to take a promotional picture
for our paper, The Dismal Times, and I had him
sitting on one of the racing goats. A car back fired,
and the last time I saw him he was headed
south on a gray and white pigmy goat named Gigantis.
Speaker 1 (47:59):
Nothing sound good, So.
Speaker 3 (48:01):
Come on down the Big first Annual Dismal Seepage Greeking
Out Greek Festival. I'll see you there, and if you
if you see a slice of pizza riding a little
gold call my office.
Speaker 12 (48:17):
Big boxes here all your favorites from four decades of
the Big Show ninety nine since each fifteen for nine
ninety nine, buy them once, play them anywhere. You can
shop the Big Box online right now at the Big
Show dot Com. Order a Big Show Stuff I phone.
The number is eight hundred and four to seven one.
Stuff Online services by Anemic dot Com.
Speaker 1 (48:33):
Have you missed any of the Big Show this morning?
You can hear it all the John Wore Mill and
Lighton Risers podcast up next. Wherever you get your podcast,
make it easy. Subscribe to us with a free I
hard radio app. Love you Mean It
Good morning. That's a Big Show on the radio. Thursday,
April twenty fourth. Our feature track from The Big Show.
Bit Boxer mayor a dismal Seabit's Greek Festival. That's the keywords,
Greek festival. Hit the Big Box at the Big Show
dot com. Click out on their contest Bundy can't get there, We'll.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Call you Yon'll play game.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Do it like this?
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Then let's be my contestant, will beat the blonde happens
to be a man of a Southeast Tennessee known as Roberts.
Good morning, Robert.
Speaker 4 (01:00):
Get drawing and John Boy, you that way man.
Speaker 1 (01:03):
As awesome as can be. Hope you're all right? You
sound good?
Speaker 4 (01:09):
Yes, sir.
Speaker 5 (01:10):
It's rain and lock and jungle over in East Tennessee
and uh excavating.
Speaker 4 (01:15):
Thing going on.
Speaker 5 (01:16):
So I got a rainy tail.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
One nice that buddy saying that cab glad to got
sales service there. Let's uh, let's see if you can
get two bells before two buzzers and get this big
old prize by one hundred and twenty dollars worth of
bulls not cleaning products, right.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Yeah, because nobody ever wants a cab when it's raining.
Speaker 1 (01:36):
Cabin the excavator stand off kind of keep up with
the man they're talking over here, right.
Speaker 5 (01:41):
With that right driver Mac truck and a Peterbilt truck
that will come in very easifull.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Alright, good right, we got it going on. All right,
let's see if you can get inside the Marcy's hanghead, Marcie,
let's go to Denmark. We've been talking about traveling all
over the world on let's put that on my map. Well,
in Denmark, if you looked up and saw a stork
on your roof, it would mean you were gonna have something.
Speaker 6 (02:11):
What target practice, You're gonna have some good luck.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
You will have good luck if you see a stork
on your roof in Denmark, Robert, agree or disagree.
Speaker 4 (02:27):
I'd say you're a child.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Ah, so you're thinking the old stork in Denmark saying
you go have a baby. So are you disagreeing with
Marcy's answer? Yes, sir, Oh she was actually right. Good luck?
Speaker 4 (02:46):
Oh my goodness.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
Yeah, Danes even build nests to attract them. So yeah,
you know you you're thinking, all right, there are not
stupid enough to believe the baby deal.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
But then.
Speaker 7 (02:58):
They got big nests on her on the roof again.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Robert Let's they won't get your bail right here? Hater?
What classic seventies TV show had a theme song featuring
the lyrics love is all around, No need to waste it.
You're gonna make it after all?
Speaker 6 (03:17):
Oh you're it's the Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
I don't think you watched the show.
Speaker 4 (03:32):
I love you, honey, but not as much as I
love Jackie. I'm gonna have to disagree with you.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
I think she was kidding. Okay, it's nice to know
where you sand love ladder because.
Speaker 6 (03:46):
You have here just continuing with the Mard curse. Sure,
my answer is the Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
That's okay. Well, okay, well he disagreed, and that was
the thing to do, as it was not dead with
the you know what it was really? Of course, it
was the Mary Tyler Moore show.
Speaker 6 (04:08):
I to back.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
No, that was an ethel Merman show. Didn't quite make it. Okay, yeah,
this gun they did like nine versions of it.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
It didn't get better.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
All right, Well, let's uh, let's say we can get
robertsprize packer bell would do that. A buzzer would not,
According to a screener of movies intended for airline play.
They checked for and edit out three things extreme violence,
sex scenes, and what else.
Speaker 6 (04:46):
My desire to see it.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
I don't tell you what.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
I have to agree.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
They do edit that stuff out. They also take out sile.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
Sex and violence, sex and nudity.
Speaker 5 (05:06):
Yes, all right, Robert, here we talking about.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
The Central States. This is for airline place.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
For airline travel. They edit the movies out. You know,
they edit violence, outs and sex, and Taylor says nudity.
Speaker 5 (05:27):
All right, then I'll agree with Tay.
Speaker 1 (05:29):
Okay, Well, I'm gonna go ahead and let you have
that for the wind behind it said sex, and then
that kind of goes along with nudity. But the the
other hands we're looking for is offensive language, is what
they edited. All right, so offensive langue? All right?
Speaker 5 (05:49):
What you need, Robert, I'm fifty eight, and I can't
remember the last time I listened to you.
Speaker 4 (05:56):
The first time you all the time, and I listened
here for years and years year, and uh okay, I
need to shout out my brother.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Okay, all right, well Robert, pick it up. You might
have a day off, but I got stuff to do,
so let's let's.
Speaker 3 (06:19):
All right.
Speaker 5 (06:20):
I'm gonna shout out to my boss Michael Daily on
the young man twenty seven year old running a million
dollar company here in Tennessee doing uh excavation works, many
many peaches of heavy equipment, dump trucks.
Speaker 4 (06:39):
And heavy howards.
Speaker 5 (06:40):
Oh right, well he's got a bunch of great guys
working for him.
Speaker 3 (06:45):
Man.
Speaker 4 (06:45):
My other shout is, hey, Jackie, Baby, I love you, honey.
Speaker 6 (06:50):
No one could see that one coming.
Speaker 1 (06:52):
Alright, got corner you, Robert. I'm looking you with it
right now, Bardie, bring jad you listen man bottom for
the hour top of your knews talking about promise season.
(07:15):
My accent, I oh yeah, it happens right on the
other side of your report.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
H m hm.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
H m.
Speaker 7 (07:36):
Hm, h.
Speaker 6 (07:42):
M hmmm.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
Good morning, Ben shows on the radio. It's time too.
I was like, yo, what's up.
Speaker 7 (08:05):
Welcome to ax Ike, the place to go for all
the four one one you need for all your uh
uh what you call Meldon Micosio relationshrimps. Dig this dear Ike.
This girl that I have known for a long time
has asked me to her senior prom. So me, being
the nice guy that I am, said yes. I never
(08:28):
went to my prom when I was in school, so
I don't know how to make this a special night
for her. So I'm writing you to get your advice.
Can you help me out please, Sincerely, Confuzzled Greenbrier, Tennessee.
Dear Fuzzy, I can tell by the way that you
(08:50):
write that you is very white. But that's all right.
Don't get up tight or fuss off, fight or loose
sleep at night. I gonna help you with your problem.
The whole night will be the bomb. You'll even please
her mom. So o hell with it.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
I can't keep it a bit.
Speaker 7 (09:12):
Yes, I can help you. Let me preach on no
that that that that now Confuzzle. This would been much
easier for Ike if and you was asking how to
stalkerate your new bride, young prom date like you was
a sleek, deadly uh what you call King Kobe Brazil
invading the nest full of them tasted juicy little mongolooses.
(09:35):
I got fags of advice, all that kind of stuff.
But if you think about it, those cats don't need advice.
They already got their game planning on the big board.
It's dudes like you that need to low down. And
I must confess to it. Your letter has touched Ike's heart.
I want you to know that you is up for
mac Daddy other year for agreeing to take your ugly
(09:58):
friend to the problem. I know you didn't say she
was ugly, but since everybody everybody knows that the good
looking girls all get asked out early, the real skaged
Bernard's got to go ask their gay friends and cousins
to take along. And since you didn't say nothing about
the two of you being relationated, sounds like you might
(10:21):
be more kanfuzzled about just the prom not to mention
the fact you go around using words like confuzzled. But
I'll give you the beneficial of the doubt. Now let's
get at he ifing you wants to make this a
special knot, don't do what the rest of her pale
born classmates are doing. Renting a tux is played brother.
(10:45):
Cruise over to the cool side of town and find
out where the pimps dress for success. Deck your own
self out in some bright red or lime green waistcoat
and slacks with that matching tie shoes in Derby like
they went to olden crowd on Sunday. Let her know
what color so she won't clash. Let them other rednecks
(11:06):
have the fashion disaster, and when it comes to getting
your ride on. Remember limos is for layme ods. Nothing
more pitiful than a bunch of crackers in the dumb
and dumber past the tuxedo pulling all that money so
thirty of them can squeeze into a four passenger limo.
They pull up, open the door and they just keep
(11:28):
climbing out. Man, one after another, looks like a damn
clown within. Just pimp your own ride with some neon
running lights of one of them big bass wolfers in
the trunk and pull up to the door with the
beat just shaking the shingles man, and when you tie
it on the feedback. This is one time to pass
on the viaenias. Show a little class and take that
(11:51):
sweet lady of yalls straight to a finer dining establishment
and use your head man.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
The drive through is for losers. Go inside.
Speaker 7 (12:04):
And pay full price. If she catches you using coupons,
you could forget that good night grabbing giggle. Follow these
simple rules and you do yourself proud. Well. I hope
this does the trick. Don't worry yourself sick. Just remember
to act slick, be cool to your chick, and don't
(12:26):
act like a prude.
Speaker 8 (12:28):
Oh yeah, dip dodge, duck diving dogs five thiet and
don't go acting on rude or I'm telling you, dude,
she'll never get nude.
Speaker 7 (12:42):
You'll have to go home and get stewed. Or the
worst might come to pass. She'll take you out in
the grass and in front of the whole class, she
might break her foot off in your ass.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
You knew that, you knew I was coming.
Speaker 7 (12:56):
I had to work that in this someway. This is I.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
You want to axy like mal to exact, John Boyn
Bill A p O Box one nine one one one,
Charlotte and Ce two eight two one nine. Good morning,
(13:37):
that's a big show on the radio. Well, the weather
is heating up, and so is a big movie release
schedule for the summer. And as usual, nothing gets by
a resident critic. Let's welcome back, Rabbi myren Bergstein show,
Owe me, homie, what's happening? How are you? Rabbi?
Speaker 3 (13:55):
Hot?
Speaker 7 (13:56):
It's getting warm outside the couple of days and then
ninety What the hell do you do with spring?
Speaker 1 (14:02):
You're fast.
Speaker 7 (14:05):
I can't step outside without making gravy. Give me a
damn break here, I'm eighty years old. No mouth, parwa
your dumbass. You can always move up north one then
give up show business.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
So I guess you've been been to the movie.
Speaker 7 (14:22):
No, I come in here for the stimulating conversation and
the off chance that Marsie shows up without a taco.
And again I'm a loser as usual.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
Of course I.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
Went to the movie, all right, So what you see?
Speaker 7 (14:35):
I would be happy to tell you if you would
shut the hell up for two seconds.
Speaker 3 (14:40):
Now.
Speaker 7 (14:40):
My great grandkids bugged me to take them with me,
so I had to see something kid friendly in quotation marks,
I wanted to see that movie about the Last Supper,
but they wanted to see Snow White.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Did you go snow Way?
Speaker 7 (14:56):
So I told him to pick something else. And they
wanted to see this mind shaft movie Minecraft. That don't
make no sense? The title, no, the movie, Oh what
a mess. Here's what the press release says. A mysterious
portal posts four misfits into the overworld, a bizarre Cubic wonderland.
(15:17):
The Trive's on imagination to get back home, they'll have
the master the terrain whilein Balkan on a magical quest
with an unexpected.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
Craft named Steve.
Speaker 7 (15:29):
Sounds interesting, except it isn't It's like Wizard of Oz
for lazy, stupid people, except everything in this oz is square.
For some reason, it's based on some video game. Oh well,
so now it makes perfect sense. That's why it's craft.
How the actors, well, I think I can shum it
up with one word. Nah, didn't know, Oh you speak
(15:51):
the kids lingo.
Speaker 1 (15:54):
I didn't know you were hit to that scene.
Speaker 7 (15:57):
I didn't know hardly anyone in it except for that
awkward guy from the Superhero Stuff not his best vike.
But if I had to pick a bright spot in
a dull, dumb movie, it would be that funny fat
guy from Natcho Mama and Karate Teddy Ben Jack Nicholson.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
Jack Black. The actor you're thinking of is Jack Black.
Speaker 7 (16:18):
I thought that was the actor whose face was so
leathery he looked like a catchers mitt.
Speaker 1 (16:23):
U's Jack Palance.
Speaker 7 (16:26):
I thought that was the guy who could look left
and right at the same time, us Jack Alum. I
thought that was.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
The love boat guy us Jack Jones.
Speaker 7 (16:36):
I thought that was the show where friends sat around
slapping each other in the crunches.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
U's Jackass.
Speaker 7 (16:44):
I thought that was the guy with the beautiful hair
that said book him, Danny Boy.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
That's Jack Lord.
Speaker 7 (16:49):
I thought that was the clown and the dunts hat
kind to sell me a breaker us Jack in the box.
I thought that was the guy with the orange skin
that only works one day in October.
Speaker 1 (17:00):
Jack o'lanlorn. So who the hell am I thinking? Jack Black? Oh?
Speaker 2 (17:06):
What a kiss on that guy?
Speaker 7 (17:07):
More creases on his face than Liberachi's chinos.
Speaker 1 (17:12):
What are you?
Speaker 7 (17:12):
I think he never heard a sunblocker moisturizer. He was
beef jerkie and a stetson O.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
The movie.
Speaker 7 (17:18):
Ah well, I give it one and a half yamaka,
mostly because I like the aqua guy. I don't know
you might have a different opinion. I mean, if you
live in your mother's basement and play games all day
and move food like a bum, I'm sure this is
your favorite movie of the year. But for guys like me,
I need more. See I read books. Maybe you heard
(17:40):
of them. It's like a whole movie in your head.
I don't need Fat Night or Mario injected into my
veins like some sort of cyber junkie. But you, your bastard.
You got no taste, no education, no clue. You are
society's brighten and a shame to your parents. Don't a
oil the favorite, and don't great. We don't need any
(18:01):
more stupid deadbeats. We're full of the fix you for
five bucks, your bastard, I'm paying, but it is possible
that I could be wrong.
Speaker 9 (18:15):
Go in peace, but be.
Speaker 7 (18:16):
Sure to see him at name. It's cheaper, y'all, bastard.
Speaker 1 (18:24):
Good morning, you got the big show on the radio.
More chances you to win coming up after your news
weathers barts.
Speaker 9 (18:30):
I stand on the hill, but not for a thrill,
for the breath of a fresh keel. And never mind
the man who contemplates doing away with license plates. He
stands alone anyhow, Bacon the cookies of discontent, by the
heat of the longer man.
Speaker 1 (18:52):
Leaving this sword.
Speaker 9 (18:55):
And then like in Portrago dot dot you know, kind
of host set up.
Speaker 10 (19:00):
Leaving a soul hot in the waters of the Medulla
Oblonga with John Boy and Billy on the Big show,
like that with John Boy.
Speaker 1 (19:49):
Good morning, Big shows on the radio. And this is
your twenty four hour alert, John Boys wonderful Thing number
one hundred and thirty nine, Gobby the Talking record for girls,
and now ready my mess Rosemary Roy was on twelve
inch final. You have a shy girl and a record player.
This is a wonderful thing for you. I'm sorry that
(20:15):
a shy girl the record player.
Speaker 2 (20:18):
That's like the worst pickup line ever.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
Well, I got to explain it when I had the
talking record for boys, you know, like shy kids as
an interactive out record as you go back and forth,
you know, bring them out, you know, the talking birds
and stuff. Oh yeah, before the rats. I'm with you,
man is making fun of kids doing that?
Speaker 2 (20:44):
Yeah, I just told you. But you know, don't you
have any real kittens for your kittens?
Speaker 1 (20:51):
They liked old days were your family, girl on the farm,
and he was all there with the kids. He doesn't practice.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
I gotta say, kids in the old days got out
and met more other kids than they do today.
Speaker 9 (21:05):
But I'm not gonna argue with.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
You about my wonderful day. Good in the sakes man. Anyway,
y'all check it out. I ain't gonna force it on you.
If you won't. What's your name and the hat little
announce it in twenty more hours from right now. That's
all right with Randy Good Morning, got the Bag Show
on the radio coming up. We play wordy word for
a big old prize pack from Law Tigers. We got
(21:29):
some cool swag from the Tigers plus a twenty five
dollars gas card motorcycle lawyers who ride as Low Tigers
representing injured riders over two decades with Lord Tigers. You'll
never ride along. Click on the link at the Big
Show dot Com find out more, Hang on play more
than minutes. Right now, it's time for Tater Tainma News
(21:53):
and here's our girl, Marcy tater More. Hello, boy, bye bye, Hey.
Speaker 6 (21:58):
Justin Bieber's in the news. Bieber's been in the tabloids
all of his life, but lately because he's looking very
thin and people are saying, spreading rumors that maybe he's
into the drugs. Maybe not. Others are saying, like the
Hollywood Reporter, that his relationships, mental health, church, and finances
are all up in the air, all right. His reps
(22:19):
responded by denying that Bieber is deep in debt. He said,
they said, quote.
Speaker 1 (22:23):
Like he can't afford to eat, and.
Speaker 6 (22:27):
They're saying that basically, the tabloids are always trying to
picture an, you know, paint and unflattering picture of justice Peter.
If he is financially overstretched. It's due to the cancelation
of the Justice Tour and his massive real estate holdings.
Speaker 2 (22:42):
According to the Reporter.
Speaker 6 (22:43):
They claim that Bieber still owes around twenty million from
the canceled tour that he did a couple of years ago.
He's also overspent on six mansions and the renovations in
Beverly Hills, Palm Springs and Idaho.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
How do you know, Well, most of the has went
to like a fire pole and a water slide that.
Speaker 6 (23:04):
He had to grow up with all those all those millions.
Last summer, Justin Bieber cut ties with his inner circle.
This is another speculation that that's the reason why he's
in trouble, including his security chief, his manager Scooter Braun,
who we all know is not the best guy. And
Scooter had a deputy, so he cut ties with him.
So Bieber now manages himself do it myself, and it's
(23:26):
having mixed results. According to the reporter. He relies greatly
on his spiritual advisor, Pastor Judah Smith of the non
denominational church Home is the church that he belongs to,
according to the Hollywood Reporter, and he also had a baby,
so maybe the baby's keeping him up. Not him, but
his wife had a baby, so like a hell just
thirty early thirties. Yeah, he's early thirties. I think he's
(23:50):
been famous since he was like fifteen sixteen. Was found
on YouTube.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
That's right.
Speaker 6 (23:55):
Yeah, just worried about the boy hey relationship news. Over
Easter weekend, they went official with their uh social media
Elizabeth Hurley is dating. Just take a guess, anyone, Drivis
CalCon No, No, Billy Ray Cyrus.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
Billy Ray, Cyrus, Billy photographic proof.
Speaker 6 (24:18):
Okay, hold on one moment, heart there they are right there.
Speaker 7 (24:25):
I had it.
Speaker 6 (24:26):
So the couple who met while filming the twenty twenty
two holiday movie Christmas in Paradise shared this photo on
Instagram showing them looking on Lovy dov.
Speaker 1 (24:36):
I was witch well, Billy dark hair, go back to
the mullet, Billy Ray, come on mate and give.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
Me ten minutes. I'd put John Boy in there.
Speaker 1 (24:47):
You know, photo shot with Billy Ray.
Speaker 7 (24:51):
Yeah, they captured the photo.
Speaker 6 (24:53):
Happy Easter with a big ol'heart emoji.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Elizabeth Hurley. So that's the one that would play in
the romantic comedies, would like.
Speaker 6 (25:00):
Right, Yeah, she was in bedazzled. She's the British actress
who was tied to Hugh Grant until Hugh Grant got
in all his little trouble with.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
What happened to he.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
Was all hooked up with her, dude stepping out on
this somewhere.
Speaker 6 (25:24):
Serena Williams has denied that her Super Bowl crip walk
at the halftime show was to drag a former boyfriend, Drake.
You know, it wasn't about him, she said, it was.
I would never do that, she said. Obviously I can
see how someone would think that, but absolutely not. I
have never had negative feelings towards him. That was the
Time magazine.
Speaker 1 (25:43):
And I missed the first part of that him.
Speaker 6 (25:47):
That's no, that's just to drag. Means that I wasn't
doing that to you know.
Speaker 1 (25:53):
What was she doing?
Speaker 6 (25:53):
She did the crip walk. You watched the whole halftime show, right,
and so Kendrick Lamar had those little lines that not
like us, and and was there was that whole Drake
you know reference in the song and they were out
and then they turned to her and she's doing the
crip walk, and so everyone was speculating because we had
no had no format to follow.
Speaker 1 (26:13):
About like why Justin Bieber is skinny something like.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
That, the same their job.
Speaker 1 (26:22):
All right. By the way, in my defense, I was
using the bathroom during half time of the Super Bowl,
like most think, I missed that much.
Speaker 6 (26:30):
Yeah right, And Nate Bergatzi will host the Emmy Awards
on CBS that happens in September, so he has been
tagged to host that show.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Yeah, all right, thank you very much for that.
Speaker 2 (26:49):
Don't drag me.
Speaker 1 (26:50):
Now do the crib walk, cra cra. Well, let's get
us a winner. That's why we already were here. We
go one eight hundred big show. We're getting a couple
of contestants and play next. Good morning, it's a big
(27:30):
show on the radio. Road it through your Thursday feature
tracking the Big Show? Bid bok mayor does one see bit?
Greek festivals? Now get it more before we get out
of here. Classic. We got a request a bit coming
up in just a few minutes. Let's see what happens
with our game right now at everybody's head, I bout
(27:51):
my bed.
Speaker 3 (27:51):
Okay, the word the word, any word.
Speaker 1 (27:54):
Let's meet our contestants. We got cameraon from Irwin, Tennessee.
Good morning camera, Good morning, john boy, well, good money.
Let's see we got Frank out of Adamsville, Tennessee. Good morning, Frank, Hey,
John boy, first time amend. All right, couple of Tennessee
(28:16):
boys going at it. How about that? Every one against Adamsville.
So Tater, how about you take Frank? Okay, I take Cameron?
Speaker 8 (28:25):
Right?
Speaker 1 (28:27):
All right, boys, let's see what we're gonna do. Frank,
you relax me and Cameron for the first thirty seconds,
all ran are these random words? Random words? All right, Cameron?
Are you ready?
Speaker 3 (28:39):
I'm ready?
Speaker 1 (28:41):
Okay, start the clock. Now, see what month it is.
Look on the calendar. Uh huh too? Blank and forget?
I I begive, yes, okay, I offer a hundred dollars
blank for that criminal bill No, one hundred dollars? What if? No,
(29:04):
if you bring in the criminal back in the Old West,
five hundred dollars blank is offered? No another word?
Speaker 10 (29:16):
Good?
Speaker 1 (29:17):
All right? Okay, Well let's go back. We gotta gotta
clear up some stuff. So, Jaggie, what were you talking about?
The word was forgive? You said? And I said forget? Okay,
But that classic to forget and forgive. That's correct, don't
you know? Don't aren't we a little lenient when we
do classic sayings, what now your score keep I'll just
(29:40):
try it, all right, one to one after round one?
All right, Frank, you got one sitting there. Let's leave
what you and Taylor can do reward? Yeah, wait till
I started? Okay, alright, ready go yeah, reward?
Speaker 6 (29:58):
All right, Hey, be good to this. These people that
live next door to you, they're what, huh you the
season is cold and it's snowing? What season is it?
Speaker 2 (30:10):
You ask?
Speaker 6 (30:11):
Stop and ask for a blank? When you're lost direction.
This is a big word for meaning you're in a
fight with somebody. Uh, there's a blank going on in Iraq.
There's a.
Speaker 3 (30:27):
Fire. Five.
Speaker 1 (30:29):
So that's the one you leave me in camera and
to pick up. Yeah, alrighty, so what'd you all get?
Speaker 3 (30:38):
Five?
Speaker 1 (30:38):
Put a five on that one? No, a four on
the one, A total of five? All right, Cameron, me
and you against the world. Yeah, okay, we're picking up
on that last one. It's kind of a toughie, you
can see. But I think Tayor was on the right
track going over across seas where things are happening like that.
(30:58):
That's where that's where uh oh here, but no, nothing's
jumping in my head. So I guess we'll just go
ahead and start ready, go okay, another word for war
a small? Uh No, that's just part of a war.
(31:18):
Uh it's a small blank Okay. Let me let me
go another way. Remember that movie with what's his name from?
Raised in Arizona? Blank air, blank air. It was it
was like prisoners. Yes, yeah, all right, there's that's the
first syllable of that. No, but a con, remember con,
(31:39):
it's not there's a con.
Speaker 3 (31:44):
Let me.
Speaker 1 (31:46):
Okay, Frank has already won the game.
Speaker 3 (31:49):
Five.
Speaker 1 (31:52):
Let's let's see Frank, do you know the word trying
to get.
Speaker 2 (31:58):
Some congreg but I can't.
Speaker 5 (32:00):
I can't get it.
Speaker 7 (32:03):
What what was that? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (32:09):
Flick yeah, conflict? Alright, I cauldn't get it. I couldn't
get it. All right, that's all right. Let's just go
ahead and move on and never mention this game again. Cameron,
you can try again, buddy, Frank, you got you long
Tiger's prize back headed over. Appreciate you all boys, Hang on,
(32:32):
Good morning, Big shows on the radio. Bit request time.
Tim Catherine out of Greenville, South Carolina, says, A JB.
It's not too soon. Can we hear Oliver talk about
your dog pearl from my request. Thank you and sorry
for you lost buddy. Thank you so much, Tim, appreciate
you and thanks a bunch of you big show listeners.
For the John Boy and Billy facebook page, there's a
(32:54):
link to that lapse of love deal that took care
of a pearl and it's like a sight and y'all
are leaving messages. It's really cool, man. It's neat to
look back and say, you think about that pearl. I mean,
you know, coming to work with me being on a
big show for fifteen years. Man, A lot of y'all
and the ones that didn't meet very vocal vocal. All right, Tim,
(33:17):
we got your request. Buddy coming up next Good morning,
(33:44):
and that's a big show on the radio. Jack just
had me a note. Cameron, my partner on Wordy Work,
wants to give a shout out to Dwayne Sparks. That's his,
his buddy who listens to wordy Word every day. Do
nothing one wordy words of Ah, Dwayne, you know your
(34:05):
body there, Cameron ghost Heaven knows it wasn't my fault,
never never.
Speaker 11 (34:15):
Any way for a jety buddy, you tell that the
day Cameron whippreciate you well, Ah, did, but I request
tam kay, they're out of Greenville, South Carolina.
Speaker 1 (34:27):
Here you go, tell it is time for Oliver. Well, well, well.
Speaker 7 (34:38):
One of the reasons this show is so popular is
because our listeners consider all of us part of their
extended family, and all of us here consider one another
a big family. So let's just set here and be
a family. That's enough of that crap. Each of us
has an individual qui and idiosyncrasies that from time to
(35:02):
time gets on the other family members nerves, but we
generally overlook it in the name of peace and harmony
in the family unit. But there comes a time when
conditions become unbearable and someone must step forward and say
something to the offending party.
Speaker 1 (35:23):
Oh I don't like where this is going.
Speaker 7 (35:25):
And since the rest of you gutlass jackasses haven't got
the stones to speak up, I do take a number.
I guess I'll have to do it. So John boy
On behalf of the entire Big Show cast and crew,
May I say, we have all had a royal.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
Buttload of your damn dog.
Speaker 7 (35:52):
Let me preach on it now. It's painfully obvious why
you and Pearl get along so well. That old adage
about how dogs and their masters begin to resemble each other.
Couldn't be more appropriate in this circumstance. That same vacant
stare when you're being spoken to, eating out of the garbage,
(36:15):
can those mystery stains on your fur, whinding at the
door when you're left outside too long, barking at Randy,
and of course dragging your ass on the carpet. Ever
(36:38):
since that mentally deranged mongrel has set foot in the studio,
things have gone down hill. Brother, You're already questionable work ethic.
I can't even say that without laughing. Has dipped off
the radar. You've started to rely on the dog for
(36:58):
all your material. I remember the good old days when
he used to have those Thomas Edison stories right and left.
And I gotta be honest that where's your froggy stuff?
Is so fifteen minutes ago? And speaking of froggy, do
you have any idea how gay you sound doing all
(37:20):
that baby talk? You're so cute, Yes you are. You're
a little angel, just a perfect little angel. Dad you love, Yes,
he does, see what I mean. I want to hit
myself in the head with a hammer. Enough already, it's
only been a month and she's already got your wearing pink.
(37:42):
You let her run wild anywhere she wants to go,
like those liberal parents who let their obnoxious, ill bred
kid terrorize other families in a restaurant and then just
look on blithely like it's just the cutest thing they've
ever seen. What that kid really needs is a first
class not jerked in this tail, and so does that
damn dog.
Speaker 1 (38:03):
You need to man up, Skippy.
Speaker 7 (38:06):
Owning a dog is a big responsibility, Your responsibility, not
everyone else is, because whenever a disaster happens, you handle
the problem with your usual amazing mastery of the English language.
The dog peas on the carpet, Jackie Tata dog pee, Hell,
(38:29):
she shreds anything within reach, Jackie Tata stuff shredded hal
She jumps up on the table and steals food. You
gonna eat that now, it's not just the big show, gang.
Even your friends and family are ready to snap. You
took it to the beach, and after two days, Captain
(38:49):
Kit was at the tackle shop trying to find a
hook she'd fit on. Poor little Coach Cobs, Poor little coach.
She mistook him for a chew toy and ran around
the farm with him in her mouth, And it didn't
help that every time she brought him back you kept
(39:10):
throwing him for her. Is that really how friends do
one another? Even your wife, your poor put upon life,
is at her wits end, As if being married to
you isn't enough of a challenge. Making her sit in
the back seat so Pearl can ride shotgun is going
(39:32):
too far? Why the missus was even willing to meet
you halfway? She was happy to let Pearl sleep in
the bed with you. She thought it was touching to
see Pearl sleeping with her head on your chest, until
she realized the other end would be in her face.
To be honest, after sleeping with you, that would seem
(39:52):
like a refreshing change of face to leave. And the chewing,
sweet fancy, I see Moses. The chewing. She's a weapon
of mass destruction with a fruity collar. You name it,
she'll chew it. Doorstops, chair legs, water bottles, purser's backpacks,
(40:14):
electrical cords, books, shoes, tater. You get the picture and
the paper this month is like a paper shredder with
a tail. Four hours in the studio and it's like
a ticket tape. Parade's been going on, So who's gonna
pay for all that? Let's just say forget the razors
(40:37):
next year, buy us some chew toys, you cheap bastard.
But to be fair, I guess Pearl has brought us
some bright moments on occasion. Well, I've never seen Terry
Hansen smile so much than the day Pearl ate that
biscuit off his lap, the time John Boy blamed Jackie
(41:01):
for one of Pearl's poots, And who could forget today
Pearl dropped a big old Cleveland steamer being in Rayford's office,
And be honest, who hasn't wanted to do that? Good times?
Speaker 1 (41:18):
But still it's not enough.
Speaker 7 (41:20):
We're sick of that, mutt. But you're the boss. You
want to keep bringing little puppy pain and he ask
to work and the immortal words of mean Gene. I
don't know what the hell we can do about it,
So go on, let her run your life, kiss a
fuzzy little butch of big dumb sap. Alienate your coworkers,
(41:41):
run off your friends, anger your family. You wouldn't be
the first guy whose life was ruined by some bitch.
Do you validate?
Speaker 1 (41:55):
I dought he's growing on good morning. That's a big
(42:24):
show on the radio, I know. And big show listener said,
got a mayor dismal Sepas albums man, He said, so
many weekend events like a double album by now if
you like this, this is keywords Greek festival. When you
hit the big box at the big show dot com. Well,
(42:45):
there's always something exciting happening in Dismal seep at South Carolina,
and you're to tell us all about it. As a
mayor himself, the honorable Merwin co fiddle swoop, Good morning,
mister mayor.
Speaker 3 (42:57):
Yeah, su Cary Merra, John boy.
Speaker 1 (43:00):
Are you just making clean on? Is this your way
of telling me you're having a star Trek convention?
Speaker 3 (43:05):
No, sorry to disappoint, that's hello. Good morning, John Boy
in Greek in honor of our first annual Dismal Seepage
Greeking Out Greek Festival.
Speaker 1 (43:15):
Oh got you that's great, first year, hun So what
made you decide to have a Greek festival?
Speaker 3 (43:21):
Oh yeah, there's a lot of contributing factors. We've done
just about every other nationality. It was down to a
toss up between Greece and Macedonia. Macedonia is just weird,
all they do is drive backwards and bet their paychecks
on sports. If I wanted to see that, I go
to Charleston.
Speaker 1 (43:39):
Does doesimal Seepage have a big Greek population?
Speaker 3 (43:43):
Oh no, we've got to truck him in from a
rental place.
Speaker 1 (43:46):
Hit a second, you're you're renting Greeks.
Speaker 3 (43:48):
You know there's a place in Georgia called we Reek
of Greek that's like a one stop shop for all
things Greek. I've got their business cards right here. Hold
on a second. Here it is when you're up a
creek without a Greek, don't freak, it's us you seek.
Speaker 1 (44:03):
Well, that is catchy. So what's on the docket for
the big weekend?
Speaker 3 (44:08):
Oh, we've got all the traditional Greek festival stuff, you know,
the food, the culture. Men with excess body hair and
one eyebrow, women with excess.
Speaker 1 (44:19):
Body hair and one eyebrow dancing.
Speaker 3 (44:23):
No, I'm sitting in my chair. Actually, no, no, no,
will you.
Speaker 1 (44:25):
Have Greek dancing?
Speaker 3 (44:27):
Oh? Why, thank you for reminding me, John boy. We've
actually gone one better. We've got the touring production of
the musical Grease.
Speaker 1 (44:37):
Well, how does that have anything to do with a
Greek festival? You know, that's all fifties music and rock
and roll.
Speaker 3 (44:46):
Well, it would be if it was spelled g r
e a s e. This, however, is spelled g r
e e ce like the Country. The all Greek version
of that show set in Greece in the fifties, and
it's even performed in Greek.
Speaker 1 (45:01):
How's that gonna go over?
Speaker 3 (45:04):
I'm sure it'll be fine. John Stamos is starring, so
all the house frozz will be there, you know, John, boy,
the Greeks were quite the athletes, so we're excited to
welcome Achilles Heels in an old woman Greco Roman wrestling exhibition,
just like in ancient times.
Speaker 1 (45:25):
You know, unless I'm mistaken, Greco Roman wrestling was done
in the nude.
Speaker 3 (45:31):
Oh well, my weekend just got better. And we've got
a couple of streets for the kiddos. Absorb of the Greek.
The human sponge will be on human sponge.
Speaker 1 (45:43):
So how's that work?
Speaker 3 (45:46):
Well, my understanding is he's like a roll of bounty
paper towels. He's a He's an old guy with extremely
dry skin, and apparently he just soaks up the water.
That's what happens when you don't moisturize. You gotta moisturize,
John boy.
Speaker 2 (46:00):
You moist your eyes.
Speaker 3 (46:01):
No, I'm straight. We've also got Gregorio's racing goats.
Speaker 1 (46:08):
Ah, kind of like the pig races we have in
our county fairs.
Speaker 3 (46:12):
Well, if the losers get eaten, that's exactly what.
Speaker 1 (46:15):
Well, speaking of food, I guess this is going to
be traditional Greek fair.
Speaker 3 (46:20):
Oh yeah, Bett's pie stuffed grape leaves, bahkla blah. And
we have a special eating contest Euro's.
Speaker 1 (46:27):
Gyro is it eros and Gyro's the same thing?
Speaker 3 (46:32):
Yes? And no, John boy, this is getting strapped into
one of those big gyroscopes you see at the fair,
and while it's spinning every which way, you have to
successfully eat a Euro. It's hilariously messy and not coincidentally,
it's located right next to the Greek porta potties.
Speaker 1 (46:51):
Greek porta potties you.
Speaker 3 (46:53):
Bet oops poopas they look like little parthenons. It's a door.
And we'll have a special ribbon cutting for Dismal Seepage's
newest eatery, Mister Nico Runtapopoulos will have the grand opening
of the newest Pizza Runt with a special appearance by
the pizza runt mascot himself.
Speaker 1 (47:14):
Hey, we know him, Ricky Sharp.
Speaker 3 (47:17):
Yeah, he's uh, he's quite a character. Yeah, not the
tallest sprout in the gardens. Did you know his pizza
run outfit is the size of an actual piece of pizza.
You know, I almost stepped on him a couple of times.
He kept yelling son of a and calling me a
cherry picker. Whatever that?
Speaker 1 (47:36):
Well those are his catch phrases.
Speaker 3 (47:38):
Ah, I see. Well, I hope he makes it back
in time for the festival.
Speaker 1 (47:42):
Well where did it go?
Speaker 3 (47:44):
Long story? I was trying to take a promotional picture
for our paper, The Dismal Times, and I had him
sitting on one of the racing goats. A car back fired,
and the last time I saw him he was headed
south on a gray and white pigmy goat named Gigantis.
Speaker 1 (47:59):
Nothing sound good, So.
Speaker 3 (48:01):
Come on down the Big first Annual Dismal Seepage Greeking
Out Greek Festival. I'll see you there, and if you
if you see a slice of pizza riding a little
gold call my office.
Speaker 12 (48:17):
Big boxes here all your favorites from four decades of
the Big Show ninety nine since each fifteen for nine
ninety nine, buy them once, play them anywhere. You can
shop the Big Box online right now at the Big
Show dot Com. Order a Big Show Stuff I phone.
The number is eight hundred and four to seven one.
Stuff Online services by Anemic dot Com.
Speaker 1 (48:33):
Have you missed any of the Big Show this morning?
You can hear it all the John Wore Mill and
Lighton Risers podcast up next. Wherever you get your podcast,
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Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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