May 31, 2023 • 45 mins
BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND!!! Poundcake and Fancy are back to update you on what they've been up to since the podcast hiatus. Why is Fancy self-loathing? How did Poundcake really meet his new boyfriend? Also, it's offically Pride month!! The boys discuss their plans and reminisce on The Ghost of Pridefest Past!
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Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
This is the true story story aboutNo. One major who rents a room
in a house, can't rub twonickels together and chose to have his life
take. Find out what happens whenhe stopped speaking logically and says something stupid.
This what is this? This isthe pound Take Podcast. Hello,
(00:31):
everybody, Welcome to the pound TakePodcast. I'm your host, Poundcake.
And I know I've been on hiatus, but I wanted to come back and
you know, say hey, updateyou what's been going on in my life?
Things have been crazy, So yeah, I'm just popping in and say
hey. And I brought I guessa guest. Only guess I could find,
(00:52):
the only guest that was still eagerto come to my podcast, asking
me every couple of weeks. Andyou know, I'm not that good of
a friend where I actually check in, definitely not. But see Fancy is
a good enough friend to where hewill check in even if I don't,
So here he is. Now,what's up, Fancy? Hey, it's
been I think this is the longtime. I mean, there's the longest
time it's ever been since we've doneone of these. I haven't seen you
(01:15):
since. Uh the Poldar Blast actuallythat was first February. Yeah, and
we recorded before then, so it'sbeen at least January. So yeah,
it's been a long time man.Yeah, well I've been busy, like
the it's out of the ordinary thatyou know, basually just booted, like
just booked. You're getting thin.I'm getting fat. I know, I'm
not even really I mean, I'mgetting thin, but I'm getting like bulky
(01:38):
or like I'm I got literally didhe check out my guns? Like we're
recruiting, Like look how big theyare. I don't know what you're talking
about. Candy, Now, don'tbe like that. The hair looks better
with longest. I like that.Yeah. That that's another thing too,
Like I feel like a switch wasflipped, Like when I turned thirty,
I you know, shout up.I'm serious. I know when I turned
(02:01):
thirty, it was like I didn'thave a midlife crisis, but it really
puts stuff in perspective on like whatam I doing with my life? And
I sound crazy to like my friends, my girlfriends and I talked to because
they're like, Okay, bro,you turn thirty, not like fifty,
And I'm like, but you know, you gotta go through thirty to get
to fifty, and if I'm inthe same spot twenty years from now,
(02:22):
it's because I didn't do anything inmy thirties. So I'm growing up my
hair and getting skinnier and trying tomake more money. So I'm taking all,
like taking on a lot plus thirtieslike eightyen years. So that's there's
that too, because I did thesame thing you did, except I didn't
work out and do anything. Ijust gave up. You just gave up,
(02:43):
yeah, because I was like,oh, I'm kind of getting a
gut. I should start working outtoo. But I was like, yeah,
no, my face is still pretty. I just got to grow out
of the beard a little bit tocover my second shin. Oh see,
what where is this new self?A loathing fancy? I don't understand.
And like before you were like theexample, like I would look after you.
(03:05):
I'm like, Okay, what's goingon. Well, I'm still out
there doing it and doing everybody.But yeah, I just doing it and
doing everybody. Yeah, I justI just I'm pulling you know, what
you did on grinder for a littlebit there. I'm just using older pictures
of myself, you know. Youknow, karma is a bitch and her.
I'm glad because you would you wouldbe the first person to call me
out, not that you're you werecruising on me, not that you were
(03:28):
trying to like hook up with me. You would get on the app just
to troll people, and I wasone of the people that you used to
troll. And I wasn't trolling.Well, I mean I was trolling for
Dick. I wasn't like trolling tomake fun of anybody. Okay, I
wasn't. You would get on there, You're like, dude, this picture's
from college, knock it off.Well, that's just because I am to
see you. I wasn't like lookingfor people to dog. I just have
(03:49):
to notice you. I was like, oh, I know that. Do
you have to use the word waynot cold? No, I don't like
using it anymore, Like it's likeanother thing I have evolved. I don't
like you using it anymore just becausewell, actually, Intense Randy could use
it on his podcast. I sureas shit can use it over here.
You want to you want to belike intense Randy? Is that? What
is that the goal? I didmeet him at the Polar but everyone has
(04:13):
met him. He's not unique.Well, I didn't think I would.
I didn't even think he would knowwho I was. I didn't know he
listened to your podcast until I foundout he was trying to be your co
host. But uh, yeah,I would say that intense Randy is probably
a guy who has dabbled, becausehe was making it very clear to me
that he wasn't into dudes, buthe wanted me to call him attractive,
which he's not. Sorry, Randy, I know you're listening, but yeah,
(04:35):
you're kind of old. But yeah, he's like, I'm not gay,
but I'm pretty good looking. Right, It's like, yeah, don't
hurt me, so yeah, sorryRandy. Yeah, no, yeah,
I don't. I try to holdourselves to a hard stand. Not that
he's he's a bad person, butis just no, he seems fun.
I don't I don't want I don'twant him on a podcast, at least
definitely not by myself. No,no, he seems like somebody who would
(04:57):
break something intentionally. But no,back back to the uh you on social
media doing anybody and everybody? Whatwhat is the status of that? Because
you you were again you were theexample of having like the boy toys and
I still get those dark now Igotta leave my shirt down. But why
(05:18):
what's with the letting yourself go?Is it because like all the just death
and destruction or why because working outtakes work? And I've never been one
to work out for a while,you know, until like I was have
abs for a bit, No,and I never worked out. But now
I'm old. So what happened tohim? Life caught up? Metabolism slows
down? I don't know, man, Yeah, you ain't lying there,
(05:41):
I know, but at least you'redoing something about it. I'm sure you
know. The Orange theory thing islike a sponsorship or whatever. It definitely
it's a great endoorance. Yeah,if I had one, I would probably
work out then too. But Iwas gonna say you could, you couldn't.
You can't beat it, man,Like are you serious? You're you're
gonna like pay me to work out? And like I was seeing like results
within like the the month. SoI think the first one was like,
(06:01):
uh six, maybe it was eightweeks the Transformation challenge, and like I
would go there and I was likeintimidated because I was, I don't know.
I would go to the gym incollege with like my roommates and they
would go off and do their ownthing. They'd be at the waits,
they'd be at the whatever, andthey're like, come on, bro,
do you even lift bro? Likeit was so like it was they were
(06:24):
going there more so to show offthan to help. I'm like, I
don't want to be here for this, And so I already know how people
feel when they're like intimidated to goto a gym because that was me.
And I was never really overweight upuntil like last year, like I had
been thick. I had been No, honestly, I had been thick.
Um I had been you know,I don't know what you would consider me,
(06:47):
like, I wasn't ever fat,but then like I feel like the
last you were like a seal likenot quite bare status because because you're you're
you were getting the belly and you'reyou're kind of hairy, so that that'sn't
a sealed sealed category or otter.Maybe I think you're talking about the same
shit. I don't know, Idon't follow up that shit. But yeah,
(07:08):
it was like I never I knewI wasn't getting so much bigger because
for a while, because I wouldwear the same clothes and you know,
I'm too lazy to go shopping inmy styles. My style has not progressed
that much over the years. Yeah, I only wear sweatpants these days because
every once in a while I'll havea reason to wear jeans, Like if
I'm vending a show with my buddyJeff, I'll put the jeans on and
(07:29):
I get up to my thighs andit's like I literally allowed him to say,
oh that this is not good atall. It was a struggle to
put these pants on today. Yeah, because the waist get up and let
me see do a little san youfeel like you're at Fox News right now.
I'm asking you, Oh god,are you wearing underwear? Okay,
(07:51):
it looked like you didn't wear theunderwear, just so sucked in. You
don't even exactly did you see howI'm busting out of these bad boys.
Damn it hurts just to sit here. I do this for you. Well,
yeah, I appreciate it. Ohyeah, thank you for coming down.
Oh I can't believe I got youout of your basement. Acy you
these days? Man, twenty fivebucks to park Fuck that shit, man.
(08:11):
Oh my god. See my thingwith working out, though, is
I have no problem like doing physicallabor, and that would be awesome if
like I can get muscle from doingthat. But I can't just mindlessly go
to a gym or even like inmy basement and just like lift weights like
up and down, up and down. I have to be doing something Like
if somebody was like, hey,help me fucking poor cement for my driveway.
(08:33):
Sweet, I'll do that. Igot no problem doing that. But
I can't just stand there and youknow, just pump a hearn man.
I hate that. So you whenyou did have apps, you were just
skinny and I didn't work out atall. I hate people like you because
that was never me like I hadyou were you were skinny, I was
toned. Like the picture, well, the picture that I would always show,
like hold, I'll pull it upon my Instagram. The picture that
(08:54):
I would always show was like thepicture that it wasn't even like a hot
picture. It was just a picturethat I had that I remember, like
this is what my body used tolook like. And look what the world
did to me see this picture.Yeah, yeah, I guarantee your flexing,
aren't you? Um No, thatwas right. That was right after
(09:15):
I got back from uh Panama CityBeach. So I was like tan and
that's just how my body looked.See and that was But mind you,
that was twenty years old, sothat's ten years ago exactly. The only
time I had as was literally whenI would flex for pictures. I was
never like walking around and just hadthem exactly. I sometimes look at those
(09:35):
pictures from my space and oh,little seventeen year old me trying to be
a thought, trying to be Iwasn't a thought till eighteen nineteen. I
was a late bloomer dude. Ididn't do anything with anybody till I was
seventeen. I feel like if wego back to old podcasts, there there's
a period in the air where youexplained why you were a thought. No,
(09:58):
I was a late bloomer dude.I think I've made it very clear.
This is my first and now you'remaking it for lost time. Yeah.
My first kiss was at seventeen withthe dude I was dating when I
was in high school. I wasseventeen, he was fifteen. Okay,
so wait we okay, we'll backup for a second because we've talked about
me and we're getting into you.But I just wanted to think about what
i've covered. So my my crazyweight loss, me working out now,
(10:18):
me growing out my hair. Iforgot my notes. I didn't even get
in. I didn't even get intomy boyfriend. So like, yeah,
you're making you're making fun of me. I didn't make fun of you.
Yes you did. He's kind ofweird looking at me. I'm sorry,
I mean doesn't he's not for you? What Why is he weird looking?
I think it's just because he lookslike such a stereotypical gay. What do
(10:39):
you mean a stereotypically dude? Ifif I saw that guy walking down the
street, he wouldn't have to sayanything, he wouldn't have to move.
I would just be like, thatguy's gay. You could just see it
in his face. Oh god,yes, um absolutely, now I've I
had never dated the guy with gayface. I do know what you're talking
about, though, I don't thinkhe has that he does. I don't
think he has that he does.Did I tell you how he met or
do you know how McDonald's right?Yeah, I would long. Oh you
(11:01):
guys getting are getting the exclusive onhow I met my boyfriend. My boyfriend,
Um, so we had Facebook dating. My brother told me he was
like, hey, get Facebook Dating. I was like, I've seen Facebook
market Place and I know what theyhave to offer. I'm not interested with
those are wheelbarrels and shovels. Andso he was like, he was like,
what do you have to lose?Like you're trying to be also did
he He was like, what doyou have to lose? So I was
(11:22):
like, man, he's got apoint. So I downloaded. You didn't
have to download. It's just likean extinction. I think you have to
go to like the application within Facebookor whatever. And I got the Facebook
Dating profile and I made one andI connected with him. And again if
he had gay face, as you'dlike to say, I wouldn't. Just
(11:45):
I sound very discriminatory, but it'strue. I don't know if I wouldn't,
no stopped that. Um so Iwhen I had uh. When I'm
acted with him on Facebook Dating,we talked for a little bit and it
just we made plans to me butjust we didn't know when. And I
was driving through Ratchet Cleveland Roads,damn it, Ratchet Cleveland Roads, and
(12:07):
I hit a pothole and had ablowout. So when I went to go
get my car fixed, he livednearby where I was getting my car fixed
up, and there was McDonald's there, and I was just killing time because
it was gonna be like a threehour await. Oh, this was fate,
That's what I'm saying. So Igot my shamrock shake and I waited
for him and we kicked it eversince we were cool. Um, So
(12:31):
that happened. And I wasn't evenreally like looking for when like, yeah,
I was on a dating app,but they say that's when you find
him when you're not looking. Butlike I was on a dating app,
but like you, there's a lotof people on a dating app that are
not really like looking for anything serious. And this is the busiest time in
my life and I never really likewe weren't. I wasn't looking for anything
serious. And sure enough he scoopedyou up from that pothole and saved you,
(12:56):
honestly did. Yeah, that's essentiallywhat happened. And so a lot
has changed something. So trying tobalance you know, work life, work,
having a life, trying to havemoney and you know I might be
moving out of my apartment soon,so another transition. I thought you just
renewed the thing though the lease.Yeah, no, I thought that was
(13:18):
up like literally the last time Isaw you. I mean, I signed
my lease in August, so Igot to August to either resign or I
thought you did, like in Marchor some shit. No. And so
my roommate he's moving in with hisgirlfriend, and so it's one of those
things where I'm either gonna live inthe place where I'm staying now by myself.
(13:43):
But that's the thing, I don'tknow, because I never really had
to budget. I've been getting offreal easy. I've always had like a
roommate, I've always split costs.I've never really had I could budget.
I just haven't had to because ilive way below my means. So now
I'm like, oh, this isst people were talking about. This is
people like, Oh, they payall their bills and then they have like
fifty dollars to their name and they'reeating like peanut butter at work. This
(14:05):
is what they're talking about. SoI am having an internal struggle. I'm
like, what am I gonna donow? It's far too early in moving
with my boyfriend. I'm not gonnabe one of those gays. But what
do you think you are? Alesbian? That's what I'm saying. So
so I'm dealing. So I'm justgoing through like a lot. I'm going
through a lot, and so I'msorry, guys, I just kind of
(14:26):
put the podcast on the back burner. That's why I haven't done one in
Why is this the first one back? Yes? Oh, I'm so honored.
Yeah, so it was. Ifeel like you've been the most reoccurring
guests, so why wouldn't You're theaudience is familiar with you. I think
as a matter of fact, whenwe were at the Polar Blast, people
were coming up to you. Theywere I felt very special agree from the
(14:46):
podcast. No, actually, I'mglad you brought that up because I forgot
that. My favorite part of thePolar Blast. There was a woman there
who was making it very clear thatshe doesn't listen to the show because she
was there like with her husband orwhatever. And so he's like, oh,
this is hell and this is whateverwhatever, and he goes, this
is fancy. And she comes upto me and she's like, oh,
I don't know who you are.I was like, it's cool. And
then she goes, who's this Isthis anybody pointing to you? And I
(15:07):
said, no, that's nobody.Go figure, see see how y'all do
me? You see how y'all dome? I was like, no,
he's not important, but it's it'swhatever. Um, I'm I don't care
how they listen. They don't necessarilyhave to see me, but I'm glad
they enjoy. Yeah, she wasdefinitely dragged there. Make it known.
(15:28):
I got to know Bill's girlfriend,though she seems cool. As we waited,
guys, didn't you guys get cussedout or about to get beat up
or something? There was a womanlooking for her husband, I guess,
and I can't God, I can'tremember what happened. But Bill's girlfriends just
made like a like a side sarcasticcomment to her, and this woman was
(15:52):
not having it. She was justnot in the mood to be dealing with
anybody's side comments. So yeah,she sounded like like had anybody said it
anything else to her, there couldhave been a problem. So me and
her just kind of looked at eachher like we're just gonna sit by the
fighter now and good luck finding yourhusband. Lady. She was very angry,
not sure what about, and wenever stuck around to find out.
But other than that, we hada nice night. Yeah, No,
(16:14):
I got oh my god, Iforgot how again? Time has gone by
so fast, Like I remember likeNew Years. It seems so long ago,
but I actually remember that freaking thepolar blast. I for whatever reason,
Oh I know why, because Ijust started working out. I was
on my diet and my body wasstill juting, so I hadn't drank,
(16:37):
and like since New Years. Thatwas the last time I got drunk was
New Years. So we're talking likewhat three weeks for I sound like a
drunk. No. I was ona diet, y'all. I promised.
I was on a diet. Iwas working out, so I was trying
not to drink as much. Sosomeone gave me a shot and then another
shot, and then another shot andthen another shot, and I I remember
(17:00):
telling Fancy. I was like,listen, people, you can come up.
We stopped taking guests on the busunless you're like boyfriends or spouses.
So I was like, be cool, don't embarrass me. My boss is
here, my program directors are here, Like my bosses are here, and
who end up sucking up? Igot so smashed. I was so smashed.
(17:22):
Honestly, I'll say that you didn'tseem all that drunk to me,
personally. I mean, the onlytime that you've really been drunk around me,
it's always been at my house.You always end up laying down,
That's why. So I never actuallysee you drunk, but you weren't like
slurring your words really or anything likethat. Because I know how to.
I know how to. You knowhow to cover it. I know how
to cover it because I'm like intimes, like in crazy times, you
(17:44):
never know when you might have to, you know, pull yourself out of
a bad situation. So I havenever There was a time. It was
Erica's thirtieth birthday. She had aDirty thirty at Magnolia, which is no
longer there anymore. Is now yourfavorite spot? Good night John Boy?
Oh yeah, my dude members onlyDave who's been on this podcast, DJ's
and runs the lights there. Butshe had a birthday party there and it
(18:10):
was the last time I remember blackingout. I hadn't blacked out since college.
And somehow, some way, becauseI'll show you, like one of
the pictures if I can find them, they're in there somewhere. Somehow,
some way, I managed to getout of the club, call my uber,
get the right directions, and endup in my bed, charge my
phone, glasses off, and Ieven like took off my clothes and drunk.
(18:30):
He was watching you that. NowI was gonna say, I don't
remember that, but I was surprisedwith myself because I was like, that's
something, that's definitely something I woulddo. Like I saw myself on the
precipice. I called it uber.I don't even think I said by to
anybody, because I text. Itext like my people the next day.
I said, hey, like sorryif I was sloppy there, like you
weren't sloppy. I was like,oh, I don't remember nothing from last
night. And I was like,did someone call me? Get me an
(18:52):
uber home? I'm thinking I threwup on someone, or you know,
I got kicked out of the club. None of that. It was just
I knew my limit. I knewthat I was over the bridge, and
I just my mom always said like, hey, if you feel uncomfortable in
a situation, get out as fastas you can. And I think my
fight or flight went off and Igot out of there. So I've learned
(19:14):
to cover myself and handed myself reallywell. I can walk home drunk.
I remember I was in Chicago,in Boystown blasted out of my mind.
And and because I wasn't used tothe drinking out there because the clubs stay
open to four, which is whichis Eastern times five, So and my
friends wanted the clothes clubs. Soit's freezing cold in December walking the streets
of Chicago, crying into my phone. I didn't get laid. I was
(19:37):
mad, and I somehow got homethat way too, So I'm used to
being in crazy situations drunk. Isay all that to say I'm proud of
myself for holding it together, butI didn't expect to get that drunk.
Like I said, it wasn't likeyou passed out on the bus or you
puked or anything. Well, Billplayed a prank. Did he tell you
(19:59):
that? He? Yeah, youtold me, the little son of a
bitch like he you told me,Like as I was pulling in my driver,
you're like, my boss just calledand he's all pissed. So I
don't know what's gonna happen tomorrow,because again you can. You can get
one over on me like that,because I'm I'm far more I'm gullible as
it is already, but I'm farmore gullible when I'm intoxicated, so he
called up from his girlfriend's phone,so it was never I didn't recognize it.
(20:21):
It could have been my program director'snumber. What kind of hell about?
What would I know? I mean, I had his I have his
number now, but I didn't haveit saved, so it was just a
number to me. And he puton this little fake voice. It kind
of sounded like my boss, butnow thinking back on it, not really
probably didn't even try it at all. Maybe he was like, because like,
I want to see you Monday morning. All right, I'm glad you
got home safe. I was like, oh man, what did I do?
(20:42):
No? You were you were good? Yeah. I remember once we
got back here, you had togo to the bathroom, so I walked
with you, and then as youwere coming out, you're like you're rambling
about something, and you just stoppedand looked at me and you're like,
you know what, I have toapologize to you. I was like,
yeah, because I'm not fucked upat all. You are. Is that
why I wanted to apologize to you? Yeah, because you, like you
(21:03):
said, you were all like,you can't be you can't be making a
scene, you can't be getting messedup. And here you go. It
wasn't you at all. But see, I feel like after a certain point,
you know your friends and you don'ttell me at all. Apparently.
No, I'm not saying I knowyou. I'm saying you know me.
You know how I am. Youknow I'm paranoid. You know I'm gonna
give you lectures, and you've cometo expect it, just like I know
(21:27):
what to get from Fancy. He'sgonna park downtown, but he's gonna complain
about it. I'm gonna tell himstop saying the F word, but he's
gonna continue to use it. I'mjust gonna believe him. I think it's
gonna be a lot funnier. Yeah, actually it would be funny. Is
it gonna be a lot funnier?But yeah, I just I've learned to
expect it, and I am tryingto get better again, thirty years old
(21:48):
now, trying to improve things.I could check upon you a lot more,
especially with all I think I probablyshould, because you're probably cursed.
You're probably a bad omen. Oh. Speaking of which, to keep with
the trend of me being on thepodcast after lative dies, my stepdad has
died since I was that's what I'msaying I was getting. I was getting
to the all the death, thedeath surrounds fancy, So I feel like
this would be a great way forhim to blow off some steam. Uh
(22:11):
So, how many relatives is thisdown? Um? I think let's see
one, two, three, six, Nope, five, five, So
I need one more because they saythey die in threes. So I need
one more this year because it wasmy two grandmothers uh a month apart,
and then two months later is myuncle who we've talked about the last podcast.
And then my boss's husband who Iwas kind of cool with, died
(22:34):
in January. And then my stepdad, who I mentioned the last time I
was here, who I had seenat Christmas time, who was getting pretty
bad with als He ended up dyingat the end of March. And uh,
yeah, a LS is pretty shitty, dude, it I've heard.
Yeah, if if you don't reallyknow what it what it all is,
because I was familiar with more thanjust a TikTok challenge, right, well,
(22:57):
you know what I was on vineback then they didn't do TikTok?
What was the als ice bucket challenge? John? Now? I think I
think it was fine. Yeah,oh god, and I didn't do it.
I was challenged to do it yearsago, and I didn't do it.
So I probably sealed his fate rightthere, a thinking you're better than
us. No, but so Ionly knew about it as much as literally
(23:18):
everybody else did from the ice Bucketchallenge and all that stuff. But it
basically, if you don't know,it eats your muscles to a point where
you lose your ability to speak,to walk, and then eventually your lung
strength is diminished so much that youbasically suffocate and die. Yeah. All
the while, it doesn't affect yourbrain at all, so you're still you
(23:38):
in your head, but you're goingto be basically a prisoner in your own
body. Yes, it's probably theworst way to die, I would imagine,
considering it doesn't mess with your brainat all, at least you know,
if it gave you dimension, it'slike, okay, well you don't
really know, but yeah, tobe a prisoner in your own body,
that would pretty much sun. Hewas in pain most of the time.
Don't really help. He was tryingsome experiment and told things I guess for
(24:00):
a few months, and my mom, bless her heart, was like taking
him to like Rhode Island, tolike specialists and shit. But luckily he
never got to the point where hewas even in a wheelchair. His speech,
his speech was getting very hard tounderstand him. But in March he
got pneumonia and he was in thehospital. He yet, he was pretty
(24:22):
bad, and my mom was like, oh, we don't know if he's
gonna make it, And honestly,I was thinking, it's probably the best
way to go now before he getsreally fucked up and unable to do anything
for himself, you know. Butthen he started to get better, so
I was like, Okay, wellhe's gonna get better. But then his
health took a turn again, liketwo weeks after being in the hospital,
and he just went down the tubeslike overnight, and he started to refuse
(24:45):
treatment and told ready to go exactly, he was just done. So he
told my mom that he didn't wantany more treatments and he wanted to be
taken home that night, and thedoctors were like, well, we got
to take you back to because hewas in rehab. They were like,
we got to take you back tothe hospital first, you know, to
you know, look at you.But he was like, no, not
(25:06):
going to the hospital. I wantto go home. So they pulled a
bunch of strings and ship to makesure that the ambulance took him home.
And you know, they said abouta hospice bed and all that, and
he died that night that he wenthome. Oh so he knew. So
yeah, he was ready, man. So I guess it's it's like he
willed himself to go before he knewthat he would not have any quality of
(25:27):
life, because like I said,I I'd see him at Christmas and he
was able to walk, like shuffleshort distances without the walker even but it
was very hard to understand him.And he I guess he had a tube,
implanet in a stomach for him todo like some type of injections and
stuff to try to slow progress.Yeah, so he had like a tube
(25:47):
and yeah, it's still yeah,so yeah, he uh, he willed
himself to go. So I hopeif if I'm ever in that position,
I would be strong enough to justbe like, you know what I'm done.
Do you not have those conversations withyour family, because I know we
we've talked about and obviously my family'svery close knit and we're not looking for
anyone to die, but uh mymom did my mom say? She's like,
(26:08):
oh, don't worry about it,like uh buying an expensive coffin put
me in a box. I'm dead, And I'm like, well, obviously
I want to get you like agoal. I want to masole. I'm
like, I want to go outin style. Yeah. See I used
to think that way, but thenyou got to think about it. Ah,
it's expensive. Beat, Yeah,you're putting a lot of burden on
your family. Well, plus,Beat, nobody comes to visit my ass
hardly now, and I have acool ass house. Ain't nobody going to
(26:30):
come to my fucking grave and plantsome flowers and shit for every year?
You know? So it's eventually it'sjust going to be all run down and
gross. So no, I don'twant that shit either. It's a waste
of land. So no, Iwant to be you know, cremated,
and I want to make a plastermold of my dick and that way everybody
who loves me can put a littlebit of my ashes in a dildo,
(26:51):
and that way I can still fuckthem for all eternity. I think that's
quite romantic, don't you think.Sure that's been before I'm sure that's probably
been done. That probably has actually, but yeah, that's my plan.
I deal. I'm sure a matterof fact, I'm sure that was like
a thing there. There was anews story years. Yeah, there was
ago about Yeah, that lady.I think she was going into Dubai or
something like like. The was like, what's this and that's like that's my
(27:11):
boyfriend's ashes or some ship in abutt plug? I think, yeah,
that's what it was. A buffalug. It was a buttlug. God,
my boyfriends always up my ass.Wow, that's a way to stay connected
forever. That that is some fetishstuff. Like I there when I went
to get my first horrible tattoo whenwhen I was sixteen, there was a
guy in there in the shop.Uh, and he was like he had
(27:32):
his hair. He had hair allthe way down his back. And I
was thinking to myself, I'm like, wow, this guy is really dedicated
to his ponytail. But I soonfound out that it was the hair of
all his dead friends. What thehair? That is what I was told.
It's the hair of his all ofthis. Okay, that's what you
were told. Who told you this? The tattoo? Or is that he
said that worked in the shop.He said, this dude comes in here
(27:53):
every day. His ponytail is weall the hair weaved into it is the
hair of all of his dead friendends. Um, he has a lot
of dead friends. Apparently, hewas like the fuck He said that kid
has a lot of problems. Hesaid, kid has a lot of problems.
I was like, wow, yeah, that's a that's an understatement.
You have enough hair to weave tomake, you know, for it to
(28:15):
go down. It was past hisbutt. He had like a rocky my
via ponytail was involved on that.So yeah, he's like, this kid
has a lot of problems. Butyeah, I just yeah, Well I
feel free, fancy. I feellike you don't get a release, and
you do have a really cool basement. I know you refuse to come over.
I don't refuse to come over.When When was the last time I
(28:36):
refused to come When was the lasttime you roll over? When was the
last time I was invited? Oh? You've been invited several times for parties.
Oh now I'm tired and ache.But you think I'm lying when I
say that sounds like excuses to me. I have gigs on weekends, I
have I mean my weekdays are don'tforget about it, so too busy for
Pride. Yes, I'm booked onPride, leaving as homos behind. I
(28:57):
see see I didn't say m Yeah, I mean gays need pay. I
mean you can. The older Iget, the more I realize this.
Yeah, I'm gay for pay.So I mean I will, I will
go. I have no problem going, but I was booked first. How
unprofessional is that? I'd like,I'm sorry, I'm going to Pride bring
(29:18):
about your wedding, but well theyhave to let you because I mean,
you can make a stink about that, you know, like showing the hate
when never saithing like man protests weddingto go to Pride exactly. Yeah,
No, I'm good, I've doneit in years past and that and that's
great. But what I am freefor I'm busy that weekend Columbus Pride.
(29:40):
Oh actually went? When is that? So it's June? It's the following
weekends. I think that's June seventeenth. And if I'm not mistaken, I
think my boyfriend has a graduation partyfor his niece, so I will probably
have to make an appearance there,but we don't go for the parade anyways,
go for the Colubs should I haven'tbeen a Columbus since with you.
(30:02):
That's been four years, five yearsyears. We almost never went to any
other city. It was the onlyhotel that wasn't bucked. And after you,
there's a reason, after the hotelyou picked in Las Vegas. I
don't want to hear about my choosinganything. First of all, the hotel
Las Vegas is supposed to be noisyand you're supposed to not get any sleep
there. I didn't have a placein the ghetto. I had a place
(30:22):
that was like very busy strip wherepeople get shot. Yeah, that's cool.
People get shot everywhere in Las aboutThis place specifically was empty because you
think if it was cheap and itwas a good place to be, days
wouldn't be all over it. Well, everything was booked up, dude.
They were sun tanning outside Windy's.That means I think it's safe. I
was. I had never ever inmy life been cussed out by an Uber
(30:47):
driver before. I didn't understand it. Like I he said, Okay,
you said, oh I booked theroom, you call the Uber. I
said, okay, that's fair,I'll call the Uber. Call the uber
sitting there waiting, wait and waiting, and in the guy see ride ride,
Uh what is it called? Ridecanceled And then I was still charged
five dollars because it was like afterfive minutes. And then like I he
(31:11):
said a message like no way,man, screw you, like in my
message cause I'm like, I'm gettingcussed out through uber messages, Like how
is that a thing? Well,he probably thought it was a setup or
something like he rolls up and thenyeah, he probably looking back on I'm
like, oh, yeah, hedefinitely thought he was going to a setup
because it was behind the Windy's allthe way down the road, which actually
doesn't make that much sense because I'msure if you could if you went to
(31:33):
like the castle, was like,hey, the guy that called an uber
jumped me. They can just trackyou know, your Uber account, Like
that's yeah, but criminals don't careabout being tracked. But they're like,
oh being charged, yeah, butlike whenever, and so yeah, I
got cussed out there. And thenthe second uber, the second ride I
call the girls, pulls up.She's like get in. She just like
(31:56):
kicks open the door, get inright up, come on, come on,
And then she's like, what areyou guys doing? It was almost
like we were in like a combatmovie where she was like trying to dodge.
She said, what are you guysdoing here? Do you know where
you're at? I was like,uh, Columbus, if you were,
if you were called, I wasn'tworried because I was strapped. I brought
two of that night, so Iwas. I wasn't in the room.
You didn't bring it with you topride, I know because I was wearing
them tight, so I had noplace to put it. Yes, because
(32:17):
you shocked your balls off. Iwish I had a vagina would have shoved
it up there like it was.It was ridiculous. She said, do
you know where you're at? Isaid, Columbus. She said, no,
you're in West Columbus. You said, you see that chick over there
that's freaking out at that gas station. She was just quick last week.
She's crazy. She was screaming toherself. She's like this is She said,
I wouldn't walk my dog in thisneighborhood. She's like, you guys
(32:38):
better be careful. I said,this dude over here booked the room.
Um, and I swear I hurtknocking at night. Yeah, because you
you called you. That's that's whenyou got drunk at the bar and like
passed out, literally laying on thebar at the bar. And then you
said that you had some hook upcoming to the room. So I did,
did I said I had back tothe room. Yes, that was
(32:59):
probably the pound. No it wasn't. You said you you were setting something
up, but then you passed out. If I honestly, if I had
a hook up coming to the room, like I, if I had a
hook up coming, I would haveprobably went to his room, because that's
why I used to do. Iused to room poach. I think you
mentioned that that was the original plan. That was the original plan. So
he admitted that was the original plan. That I told you that probably going
(33:20):
down that I always used to roompoach. I had never ever booked a
room for Pride before all Gay's roompoach. If you can't afford a room,
you go down there, you hookup with a guy, and you
sleep in his room. I havedone that for years, and thank god,
nothing ever happened. Actually, themost that happened at night, Joe
got too drunk and pissed on Iremember, did he Yeah, he fell
(33:40):
asleep and he pissed. He pissedthe bed. I think he pissed on
your side. He ain't pissed onmy side. I ain't. Yeah,
it makes sense, yeah, abit, because whatever you you two were
probably cuddling with each other and Iwas probably way on the corner. Well,
actually, do do we have Ithink we had two beds anyway?
No, we didn't. Oh wedidn't. We had one bed because I
think lucky son, because I thinkI nudged you when I heard that.
(34:01):
When I heard the knocking, Iheard No, you probably nudged Joe and
scared the piss out of him.Maybe No, that that was nuts.
That was I guess an experience thatI damn right, we're gonna do it
again, baby, I'm not doingthat, not that part again. You
booked the room? No, haveyour gay faced boyfriend booked the room?
(34:22):
I probably will, but do thatif he well, I think he's probably
gonna drive down there for like theday. Yeah, because he has the
graduation parties. I don't know howlong he wants to stay to that.
But again, all I want todo is the drag bars, the gay
clubs, and then maybe brunch Sundaymorning, So I don't care about that.
But you talk about brunch now untilyou end up drinking till like three
(34:45):
thirty on brunches all day when it'sPride, Like, what are you talking
about that gays invented brunch? No, I think they have a set time
if you're gonna do like the actualdrag brunch thing. I think it's a
set time. Well whatever, it'sPride weekenders of that entire week, we
can make use of it if wewant to. I remember I was talking
to some Oh, you were somad about this guy there that was like,
(35:07):
oh, why did you hate himso much? You're like, he's
just so still. Yeah, hewas so drunk, obnoxious and he kept
saying pizza, very strange. Hewas so hot, like he was.
I still followed that guy on Instagram. I don't even remember what he looked
like. I just remember he waslike a dumb jock, stupid a face
fuck, Oh my god, allright, all right, tell us what
(35:30):
you really feel? Yeah, thatwas that was. That was probably like
the drunkest I've ever been at Pridethe other ones. I actually know that's
not true because the next year Iwent, and I went with my roommates,
and I don't even think we didn'thave a hotel, did we.
I don't think we did. Ithink we drove down there for the day
(35:51):
and then drove back. Jesus,I don't remember us having a hotel.
Maybe I was too drunk. Ohno, yes we did. Yes we
did. We had a hotel,but it was by the airport, so
it was a far farther drive down, so we didn't really have access to
the downtown like we did before whenwe were on the West Side. I
was like, oh, wow,we're on West eighteenth Street. That's so
close to downtown there. But yeah, we did go down there and I
(36:15):
fell asleep at one of the tablesthat they had outside access. Is that
like just what you do apparently,but I didn't know that's what I do.
You don't know until you get it. Was like it wasn't even like
a midnight yet. Because you starteddrinking in the room. I was like,
dude, are you sure you wantto do it? I'm fine,
No, I think no, becauseyou were forcing me to drink that I
wasn't for you. I think Iwas on medication at that time. I
was like, yeah, you werefor yearsiasis shit, yeah. I was
(36:36):
like, I have I'm on medicationright now, so I got to protect
my liver and so I can onlyhave one strong one. That you were
doing shots in my uv blue inthe room and I was like that nasty
stuff, and I said, dude, mixing now, I don't want to
mix. I drink no, seriously, you were like I drink harder stuff
in and then yeah midnight clip.Yeah it was real, real fun for
me. Yeah okay, and thenyeah because I did false sleep in the
(36:59):
bar. Yeahs at the bar andthose getting talked to by a bunch of
chicks because he's so adorable. I'mstanding there like my dick in my hand,
like, oh, this is fun. Picture that you sit me A
Joe shirtless was really hot. Idon't he doesn't, think, he said,
but whatever he could he could belike he works out for like three
hours a day, Dude, he'sinsane, and then he wonders where the
time goes? Why does he workout that because he's insane? Does he
(37:19):
want to He should do like sometype of modeling. He doesn't have to
do like a I don't know howtall he is, but he could do
like a commercial modeling or something he'sstarting to do, like drag shows.
I guess I know, But likehe got that hot body, he's not
going to show it off. Idon't understand. Well again, like I
said, I know the picture you'retalking about, the picture with his shirt
open. He looks perfect, Yes, and his face is perfect. He's
(37:40):
perfect eyebrows and a and he tecksand he texts me back, I don't
even look good there. Oh,I hate him too. I sacrifice for
months trying to achieve him. Idon't even have abs yet. I got
upper torso, I got upper bodystrain. I'm faster, but he's he's
got the dream body. He's anasshole, not a pimple or award,
(38:00):
not one. I hate him.Yeah, I hate him too. I'm
gonna talk to him next time,saying I'm like, you should do some
modeling. Let me be your amanager. I'm ugly. He don't even
look good. Yeah, he atleast started only fans, sure, or
not even only fans. What didthey call it? Well, I don't
know, just a certain type ofmodeling. Just a Twitter account? Yeah
(38:22):
you all Twitter? So? Umdo you have the consistent um F boy?
Well, I still got Mason aroundthat's what I mean. I didn't
want to say his name if hewasn't relevant. No, yeah, yeah,
he's still yeah. Well see Iremember I was his first, so
I think he still Literally I said, why do you still put up with
me? He was like, asyou were my first. I was like,
oh, that's the reason. Kay. Thanks, It's like I thought
(38:43):
there would be more to that together. What we're what? You guys don't
live together or anything? Oh no, remember I'm still living with Joe.
I'm paying four hundred a month.And then and then, oh yeah,
I remember. I wanted to cushyou out because you put me in this
mother a group thread with like nineteenpeople about what when you got your new
phone? Oh my new number,dude, I clicked the box that says
(39:07):
send it separately, and it stilldoesn't. It didn't do it. It
didn't listen. So I wanted tomurder you. I was like, I
was like, what is this?I was like why? And I thought
it was control. I'm like someone, I literally thought someone hacked your phone
because I'm like, why would youhave a different number? And she's like,
ha, hi, it's fancy.And then like the way you were
talking and the way your friends wereresponding. I said, oh, this
(39:28):
is definitely fancy for sure, exactlybecause I was like, there's no way
you would have friends that would talkthat greasy to you. I was like,
wow, I'm not the only whenit talk to Fay like that,
They're like, oh my gosh,please delete me. Ill You're grow They
were like, oh my gosh.Oh I'm gonna read them. That's what
I'm gonna read. Oh god,you still have them? I think so.
I really I don't delete it much, and I think I mute it
thread because it was going off likeall day. But it was just like
(39:51):
it was Inbruary. Yeah, dude, I delete text almost every three or
four days just to like save space. I guess I don't really need to
Where where is it? Where is? They really weren't that good. I
might have, but it was justthe way people were responsed. I was
like, damn, fancy, ain'tgot no friends. Let let it be
nice as this guy it was okay, me and eighteen other people, and
(40:13):
it said Hey, it's fancy.This is my new number. Save it
And people were like wtf and theywere like, how'd you get this number?
Nah? I'm good? Why justremove me from this, and and
someone commented back, I'm here forthe comments, he said, and said,
it's not me. I'm not here. Someone said, who the F
is this? Someone said I neverbothered to save the old one. Literally
(40:37):
no, no, I said,I never bother saved the old Sam,
because who would send me pictures ofthree midgets hall tied, asked him,
and human centipede style with pig earsglued on them, with furry dresses and
wiley coyote drooling over them with utensilsand a strap on at five am.
Honestly, it's better than morning paper. That's that's a very creative images that
(41:00):
Sam depicted. I hope it's Iwonder if it's real out there. Someone
say, get me off, getme out of this chain. I'm going
to block this, like it justwent on and on. This was like
all day. It was like threehours. Oh fancy, you need a
friend? I know. That's whyI'm saying, why why would I bother
(41:22):
being buried? And hope people visitme when I'm dead. People don't visit
me one on the lives, SoI make I make my house awesome and
nobody cares, So okay, fuckeverybody, Seriously, it's Pride month and
you do not deserve to be depressed. You get thirty days. Well,
du pandering to you. Since there'sgonna be such a long gap in between
us recording and you broadcasting, I'mgonna have like three or four more relatives
(41:44):
die by then, so we're gonnahave to do this again. Maybe you
can do it. I'm not goingto participate, but you can do a
seance on the podcast and then seeif you can channel them because I won't
be Yeah, we could, Iput have you been Have you ever seen
like a psychic or anything? Neverdone that? That seems like something you
(42:05):
would do all the all the deaddolls and stuff that are possessing your basement
and you don't have anything. No, I've never seen a psychic. I
will say. Back when I waslike in high school, I drank the
Sylvia Round kool aid from Montell.Okay, we talked about this on a
pass on a pass, Yeah,so yeah, I drank. I drank
her kool aid for a while.I went and saw that bitch twice.
(42:27):
I gave her a hug and everything. You really believed her? Yeah,
well she sounded good at the time. She was pan have something to believe
in. Man, you gotta havesomething to believe in. But yeah,
so this was this podcast was essentiallyjust to update everybody and what's been going
on in our lives. More deathand destruction, more death and destruction.
But you're quite entertaining when you tellit. So at least, why else
would I be here? I was, so at least you have that going
(42:51):
for you. There's some people thathave death and destruction and they're dead boring,
and that's not you. Fancy andboring don't go in the same sentence.
Actually, uh, you know youwant to wrap up. Probably you're
good. But back in March,I actually had an STD scare. But
at least it was a scare exactlyheartch You want to guess which one you're
gonna be care of? Uh gonnagonna pacificis Come on, be realistic,
(43:15):
no idea, Come on, justguess one. Herpies Nona no syphilis.
YEPI are closely related. I swearbecause I when I went to go get
an STD test, it said,uh, gonna syphilis slash syphilis Nona lamydia.
Oh damn it, you're right,Okay, someone who gets tested all
(43:36):
the time I'm gonna take your wordfor it. I should have known better
considering my my primary practitioner is aninfectious disease doctor. Yeah enough. Well
then, but yeah, I thoughtI had a little thing going on and
I was like, oh, betterget a blood test. But it wasn't
so okay. Well, by thenext time we probably record, I probably
won't have it. You might haveanother scare that'll be a tease. Where
(43:58):
can they find you? In thenon biblical sense? Twitter tie the by
guy and U Instagram? Uh tieMercury excellent. Yeah, I haven't done
anything with the only fans in awhile, so thinking about it, But
you know, Mason's hesitant, andif I'm trying to get people to look
at it, I need Mason's abs. Mason has no life, he's got
(44:19):
no job, he doesn't have hislicense. So it's like, dude,
go make some money and do thisif he doesn't want to do anything,
because it's out of it forever.Like so what he's hot, Well,
I better be a mortified online whileI'm still hot. Then, you know,
looking like you know Jack Nicholson,Now you need his abs? I
know, yeah, you need hisabs? All right? Well, you
guys know where to find me RadioCody b Twitter, Instagram, TikTok,
straight across the board. Obviously youcan find this podcast wherever you get your
(44:43):
podcast I Heeart Radio, wherever elseyou get your podcast it but it'd be
iHeartRadio. Um. But yeah,so that is it for me. Thank
you fancy for coming in always firston such short notice, even though it
was like a week and you werebegging, he was itching to get it.
Oh, it was I need somethingto do. M hmmm. And
that guy's is my pound tic
This is the true story story aboutNo. One major who rents a room
in a house, can't rub twonickels together and chose to have his life
take. Find out what happens whenhe stopped speaking logically and says something stupid.
This what is this? This isthe pound Take Podcast. Hello,
(00:31):
everybody, Welcome to the pound TakePodcast. I'm your host, Poundcake.
And I know I've been on hiatus, but I wanted to come back and
you know, say hey, updateyou what's been going on in my life?
Things have been crazy, So yeah, I'm just popping in and say
hey. And I brought I guessa guest. Only guess I could find,
(00:52):
the only guest that was still eagerto come to my podcast, asking
me every couple of weeks. Andyou know, I'm not that good of
a friend where I actually check in, definitely not. But see Fancy is
a good enough friend to where hewill check in even if I don't,
So here he is. Now,what's up, Fancy? Hey, it's
been I think this is the longtime. I mean, there's the longest
time it's ever been since we've doneone of these. I haven't seen you
(01:15):
since. Uh the Poldar Blast actuallythat was first February. Yeah, and
we recorded before then, so it'sbeen at least January. So yeah,
it's been a long time man.Yeah, well I've been busy, like
the it's out of the ordinary thatyou know, basually just booted, like
just booked. You're getting thin.I'm getting fat. I know, I'm
not even really I mean, I'mgetting thin, but I'm getting like bulky
(01:38):
or like I'm I got literally didhe check out my guns? Like we're
recruiting, Like look how big theyare. I don't know what you're talking
about. Candy, Now, don'tbe like that. The hair looks better
with longest. I like that.Yeah. That that's another thing too,
Like I feel like a switch wasflipped, Like when I turned thirty,
I you know, shout up.I'm serious. I know when I turned
(02:01):
thirty, it was like I didn'thave a midlife crisis, but it really
puts stuff in perspective on like whatam I doing with my life? And
I sound crazy to like my friends, my girlfriends and I talked to because
they're like, Okay, bro,you turn thirty, not like fifty,
And I'm like, but you know, you gotta go through thirty to get
to fifty, and if I'm inthe same spot twenty years from now,
(02:22):
it's because I didn't do anything inmy thirties. So I'm growing up my
hair and getting skinnier and trying tomake more money. So I'm taking all,
like taking on a lot plus thirtieslike eightyen years. So that's there's
that too, because I did thesame thing you did, except I didn't
work out and do anything. Ijust gave up. You just gave up,
(02:43):
yeah, because I was like,oh, I'm kind of getting a
gut. I should start working outtoo. But I was like, yeah,
no, my face is still pretty. I just got to grow out
of the beard a little bit tocover my second shin. Oh see,
what where is this new self?A loathing fancy? I don't understand.
And like before you were like theexample, like I would look after you.
(03:05):
I'm like, Okay, what's goingon. Well, I'm still out
there doing it and doing everybody.But yeah, I just doing it and
doing everybody. Yeah, I justI just I'm pulling you know, what
you did on grinder for a littlebit there. I'm just using older pictures
of myself, you know. Youknow, karma is a bitch and her.
I'm glad because you would you wouldbe the first person to call me
out, not that you're you werecruising on me, not that you were
(03:28):
trying to like hook up with me. You would get on the app just
to troll people, and I wasone of the people that you used to
troll. And I wasn't trolling.Well, I mean I was trolling for
Dick. I wasn't like trolling tomake fun of anybody. Okay, I
wasn't. You would get on there, You're like, dude, this picture's
from college, knock it off.Well, that's just because I am to
see you. I wasn't like lookingfor people to dog. I just have
(03:49):
to notice you. I was like, oh, I know that. Do
you have to use the word waynot cold? No, I don't like
using it anymore, Like it's likeanother thing I have evolved. I don't
like you using it anymore just becausewell, actually, Intense Randy could use
it on his podcast. I sureas shit can use it over here.
You want to you want to belike intense Randy? Is that? What
is that the goal? I didmeet him at the Polar but everyone has
(04:13):
met him. He's not unique.Well, I didn't think I would.
I didn't even think he would knowwho I was. I didn't know he
listened to your podcast until I foundout he was trying to be your co
host. But uh, yeah,I would say that intense Randy is probably
a guy who has dabbled, becausehe was making it very clear to me
that he wasn't into dudes, buthe wanted me to call him attractive,
which he's not. Sorry, Randy, I know you're listening, but yeah,
(04:35):
you're kind of old. But yeah, he's like, I'm not gay,
but I'm pretty good looking. Right, It's like, yeah, don't
hurt me, so yeah, sorryRandy. Yeah, no, yeah,
I don't. I try to holdourselves to a hard stand. Not that
he's he's a bad person, butis just no, he seems fun.
I don't I don't want I don'twant him on a podcast, at least
definitely not by myself. No,no, he seems like somebody who would
(04:57):
break something intentionally. But no,back back to the uh you on social
media doing anybody and everybody? Whatwhat is the status of that? Because
you you were again you were theexample of having like the boy toys and
I still get those dark now Igotta leave my shirt down. But why
(05:18):
what's with the letting yourself go?Is it because like all the just death
and destruction or why because working outtakes work? And I've never been one
to work out for a while,you know, until like I was have
abs for a bit, No,and I never worked out. But now
I'm old. So what happened tohim? Life caught up? Metabolism slows
down? I don't know, man, Yeah, you ain't lying there,
(05:41):
I know, but at least you'redoing something about it. I'm sure you
know. The Orange theory thing islike a sponsorship or whatever. It definitely
it's a great endoorance. Yeah,if I had one, I would probably
work out then too. But Iwas gonna say you could, you couldn't.
You can't beat it, man,Like are you serious? You're you're
gonna like pay me to work out? And like I was seeing like results
within like the the month. SoI think the first one was like,
(06:01):
uh six, maybe it was eightweeks the Transformation challenge, and like I
would go there and I was likeintimidated because I was, I don't know.
I would go to the gym incollege with like my roommates and they
would go off and do their ownthing. They'd be at the waits,
they'd be at the whatever, andthey're like, come on, bro,
do you even lift bro? Likeit was so like it was they were
(06:24):
going there more so to show offthan to help. I'm like, I
don't want to be here for this, And so I already know how people
feel when they're like intimidated to goto a gym because that was me.
And I was never really overweight upuntil like last year, like I had
been thick. I had been No, honestly, I had been thick.
Um I had been you know,I don't know what you would consider me,
(06:47):
like, I wasn't ever fat,but then like I feel like the
last you were like a seal likenot quite bare status because because you're you're
you were getting the belly and you'reyou're kind of hairy, so that that'sn't
a sealed sealed category or otter.Maybe I think you're talking about the same
shit. I don't know, Idon't follow up that shit. But yeah,
(07:08):
it was like I never I knewI wasn't getting so much bigger because
for a while, because I wouldwear the same clothes and you know,
I'm too lazy to go shopping inmy styles. My style has not progressed
that much over the years. Yeah, I only wear sweatpants these days because
every once in a while I'll havea reason to wear jeans, Like if
I'm vending a show with my buddyJeff, I'll put the jeans on and
(07:29):
I get up to my thighs andit's like I literally allowed him to say,
oh that this is not good atall. It was a struggle to
put these pants on today. Yeah, because the waist get up and let
me see do a little san youfeel like you're at Fox News right now.
I'm asking you, Oh god,are you wearing underwear? Okay,
(07:51):
it looked like you didn't wear theunderwear, just so sucked in. You
don't even exactly did you see howI'm busting out of these bad boys.
Damn it hurts just to sit here. I do this for you. Well,
yeah, I appreciate it. Ohyeah, thank you for coming down.
Oh I can't believe I got youout of your basement. Acy you
these days? Man, twenty fivebucks to park Fuck that shit, man.
(08:11):
Oh my god. See my thingwith working out, though, is
I have no problem like doing physicallabor, and that would be awesome if
like I can get muscle from doingthat. But I can't just mindlessly go
to a gym or even like inmy basement and just like lift weights like
up and down, up and down. I have to be doing something Like
if somebody was like, hey,help me fucking poor cement for my driveway.
(08:33):
Sweet, I'll do that. Igot no problem doing that. But
I can't just stand there and youknow, just pump a hearn man.
I hate that. So you whenyou did have apps, you were just
skinny and I didn't work out atall. I hate people like you because
that was never me like I hadyou were you were skinny, I was
toned. Like the picture, well, the picture that I would always show,
like hold, I'll pull it upon my Instagram. The picture that
(08:54):
I would always show was like thepicture that it wasn't even like a hot
picture. It was just a picturethat I had that I remember, like
this is what my body used tolook like. And look what the world
did to me see this picture.Yeah, yeah, I guarantee your flexing,
aren't you? Um No, thatwas right. That was right after
(09:15):
I got back from uh Panama CityBeach. So I was like tan and
that's just how my body looked.See and that was But mind you,
that was twenty years old, sothat's ten years ago exactly. The only
time I had as was literally whenI would flex for pictures. I was
never like walking around and just hadthem exactly. I sometimes look at those
(09:35):
pictures from my space and oh,little seventeen year old me trying to be
a thought, trying to be Iwasn't a thought till eighteen nineteen. I
was a late bloomer dude. Ididn't do anything with anybody till I was
seventeen. I feel like if wego back to old podcasts, there there's
a period in the air where youexplained why you were a thought. No,
(09:58):
I was a late bloomer dude.I think I've made it very clear.
This is my first and now you'remaking it for lost time. Yeah.
My first kiss was at seventeen withthe dude I was dating when I
was in high school. I wasseventeen, he was fifteen. Okay,
so wait we okay, we'll backup for a second because we've talked about
me and we're getting into you.But I just wanted to think about what
i've covered. So my my crazyweight loss, me working out now,
(10:18):
me growing out my hair. Iforgot my notes. I didn't even get
in. I didn't even get intomy boyfriend. So like, yeah,
you're making you're making fun of me. I didn't make fun of you.
Yes you did. He's kind ofweird looking at me. I'm sorry,
I mean doesn't he's not for you? What Why is he weird looking?
I think it's just because he lookslike such a stereotypical gay. What do
(10:39):
you mean a stereotypically dude? Ifif I saw that guy walking down the
street, he wouldn't have to sayanything, he wouldn't have to move.
I would just be like, thatguy's gay. You could just see it
in his face. Oh god,yes, um absolutely, now I've I
had never dated the guy with gayface. I do know what you're talking
about, though, I don't thinkhe has that he does. I don't
think he has that he does.Did I tell you how he met or
do you know how McDonald's right?Yeah, I would long. Oh you
(11:01):
guys getting are getting the exclusive onhow I met my boyfriend. My boyfriend,
Um, so we had Facebook dating. My brother told me he was
like, hey, get Facebook Dating. I was like, I've seen Facebook
market Place and I know what theyhave to offer. I'm not interested with
those are wheelbarrels and shovels. Andso he was like, he was like,
what do you have to lose?Like you're trying to be also did
he He was like, what doyou have to lose? So I was
(11:22):
like, man, he's got apoint. So I downloaded. You didn't
have to download. It's just likean extinction. I think you have to
go to like the application within Facebookor whatever. And I got the Facebook
Dating profile and I made one andI connected with him. And again if
he had gay face, as you'dlike to say, I wouldn't. Just
(11:45):
I sound very discriminatory, but it'strue. I don't know if I wouldn't,
no stopped that. Um so Iwhen I had uh. When I'm
acted with him on Facebook Dating,we talked for a little bit and it
just we made plans to me butjust we didn't know when. And I
was driving through Ratchet Cleveland Roads,damn it, Ratchet Cleveland Roads, and
(12:07):
I hit a pothole and had ablowout. So when I went to go
get my car fixed, he livednearby where I was getting my car fixed
up, and there was McDonald's there, and I was just killing time because
it was gonna be like a threehour await. Oh, this was fate,
That's what I'm saying. So Igot my shamrock shake and I waited
for him and we kicked it eversince we were cool. Um, So
(12:31):
that happened. And I wasn't evenreally like looking for when like, yeah,
I was on a dating app,but they say that's when you find
him when you're not looking. Butlike I was on a dating app,
but like you, there's a lotof people on a dating app that are
not really like looking for anything serious. And this is the busiest time in
my life and I never really likewe weren't. I wasn't looking for anything
serious. And sure enough he scoopedyou up from that pothole and saved you,
(12:56):
honestly did. Yeah, that's essentiallywhat happened. And so a lot
has changed something. So trying tobalance you know, work life, work,
having a life, trying to havemoney and you know I might be
moving out of my apartment soon,so another transition. I thought you just
renewed the thing though the lease.Yeah, no, I thought that was
(13:18):
up like literally the last time Isaw you. I mean, I signed
my lease in August, so Igot to August to either resign or I
thought you did, like in Marchor some shit. No. And so
my roommate he's moving in with hisgirlfriend, and so it's one of those
things where I'm either gonna live inthe place where I'm staying now by myself.
(13:43):
But that's the thing, I don'tknow, because I never really had
to budget. I've been getting offreal easy. I've always had like a
roommate, I've always split costs.I've never really had I could budget.
I just haven't had to because ilive way below my means. So now
I'm like, oh, this isst people were talking about. This is
people like, Oh, they payall their bills and then they have like
fifty dollars to their name and they'reeating like peanut butter at work. This
(14:05):
is what they're talking about. SoI am having an internal struggle. I'm
like, what am I gonna donow? It's far too early in moving
with my boyfriend. I'm not gonnabe one of those gays. But what
do you think you are? Alesbian? That's what I'm saying. So
so I'm dealing. So I'm justgoing through like a lot. I'm going
through a lot, and so I'msorry, guys, I just kind of
(14:26):
put the podcast on the back burner. That's why I haven't done one in
Why is this the first one back? Yes? Oh, I'm so honored.
Yeah, so it was. Ifeel like you've been the most reoccurring
guests, so why wouldn't You're theaudience is familiar with you. I think
as a matter of fact, whenwe were at the Polar Blast, people
were coming up to you. Theywere I felt very special agree from the
(14:46):
podcast. No, actually, I'mglad you brought that up because I forgot
that. My favorite part of thePolar Blast. There was a woman there
who was making it very clear thatshe doesn't listen to the show because she
was there like with her husband orwhatever. And so he's like, oh,
this is hell and this is whateverwhatever, and he goes, this
is fancy. And she comes upto me and she's like, oh,
I don't know who you are.I was like, it's cool. And
then she goes, who's this Isthis anybody pointing to you? And I
(15:07):
said, no, that's nobody.Go figure, see see how y'all do
me? You see how y'all dome? I was like, no,
he's not important, but it's it'swhatever. Um, I'm I don't care
how they listen. They don't necessarilyhave to see me, but I'm glad
they enjoy. Yeah, she wasdefinitely dragged there. Make it known.
(15:28):
I got to know Bill's girlfriend,though she seems cool. As we waited,
guys, didn't you guys get cussedout or about to get beat up
or something? There was a womanlooking for her husband, I guess,
and I can't God, I can'tremember what happened. But Bill's girlfriends just
made like a like a side sarcasticcomment to her, and this woman was
(15:52):
not having it. She was justnot in the mood to be dealing with
anybody's side comments. So yeah,she sounded like like had anybody said it
anything else to her, there couldhave been a problem. So me and
her just kind of looked at eachher like we're just gonna sit by the
fighter now and good luck finding yourhusband. Lady. She was very angry,
not sure what about, and wenever stuck around to find out.
But other than that, we hada nice night. Yeah, No,
(16:14):
I got oh my god, Iforgot how again? Time has gone by
so fast, Like I remember likeNew Years. It seems so long ago,
but I actually remember that freaking thepolar blast. I for whatever reason,
Oh I know why, because Ijust started working out. I was
on my diet and my body wasstill juting, so I hadn't drank,
(16:37):
and like since New Years. Thatwas the last time I got drunk was
New Years. So we're talking likewhat three weeks for I sound like a
drunk. No. I was ona diet, y'all. I promised.
I was on a diet. Iwas working out, so I was trying
not to drink as much. Sosomeone gave me a shot and then another
shot, and then another shot andthen another shot, and I I remember
(17:00):
telling Fancy. I was like,listen, people, you can come up.
We stopped taking guests on the busunless you're like boyfriends or spouses.
So I was like, be cool, don't embarrass me. My boss is
here, my program directors are here, Like my bosses are here, and
who end up sucking up? Igot so smashed. I was so smashed.
(17:22):
Honestly, I'll say that you didn'tseem all that drunk to me,
personally. I mean, the onlytime that you've really been drunk around me,
it's always been at my house.You always end up laying down,
That's why. So I never actuallysee you drunk, but you weren't like
slurring your words really or anything likethat. Because I know how to.
I know how to. You knowhow to cover it. I know how
to cover it because I'm like intimes, like in crazy times, you
(17:44):
never know when you might have to, you know, pull yourself out of
a bad situation. So I havenever There was a time. It was
Erica's thirtieth birthday. She had aDirty thirty at Magnolia, which is no
longer there anymore. Is now yourfavorite spot? Good night John Boy?
Oh yeah, my dude members onlyDave who's been on this podcast, DJ's
and runs the lights there. Butshe had a birthday party there and it
(18:10):
was the last time I remember blackingout. I hadn't blacked out since college.
And somehow, some way, becauseI'll show you, like one of
the pictures if I can find them, they're in there somewhere. Somehow,
some way, I managed to getout of the club, call my uber,
get the right directions, and endup in my bed, charge my
phone, glasses off, and Ieven like took off my clothes and drunk.
(18:30):
He was watching you that. NowI was gonna say, I don't
remember that, but I was surprisedwith myself because I was like, that's
something, that's definitely something I woulddo. Like I saw myself on the
precipice. I called it uber.I don't even think I said by to
anybody, because I text. Itext like my people the next day.
I said, hey, like sorryif I was sloppy there, like you
weren't sloppy. I was like,oh, I don't remember nothing from last
night. And I was like,did someone call me? Get me an
(18:52):
uber home? I'm thinking I threwup on someone, or you know,
I got kicked out of the club. None of that. It was just
I knew my limit. I knewthat I was over the bridge, and
I just my mom always said like, hey, if you feel uncomfortable in
a situation, get out as fastas you can. And I think my
fight or flight went off and Igot out of there. So I've learned
(19:14):
to cover myself and handed myself reallywell. I can walk home drunk.
I remember I was in Chicago,in Boystown blasted out of my mind.
And and because I wasn't used tothe drinking out there because the clubs stay
open to four, which is whichis Eastern times five, So and my
friends wanted the clothes clubs. Soit's freezing cold in December walking the streets
of Chicago, crying into my phone. I didn't get laid. I was
(19:37):
mad, and I somehow got homethat way too, So I'm used to
being in crazy situations drunk. Isay all that to say I'm proud of
myself for holding it together, butI didn't expect to get that drunk.
Like I said, it wasn't likeyou passed out on the bus or you
puked or anything. Well, Billplayed a prank. Did he tell you
(19:59):
that? He? Yeah, youtold me, the little son of a
bitch like he you told me,Like as I was pulling in my driver,
you're like, my boss just calledand he's all pissed. So I
don't know what's gonna happen tomorrow,because again you can. You can get
one over on me like that,because I'm I'm far more I'm gullible as
it is already, but I'm farmore gullible when I'm intoxicated, so he
called up from his girlfriend's phone,so it was never I didn't recognize it.
(20:21):
It could have been my program director'snumber. What kind of hell about?
What would I know? I mean, I had his I have his
number now, but I didn't haveit saved, so it was just a
number to me. And he puton this little fake voice. It kind
of sounded like my boss, butnow thinking back on it, not really
probably didn't even try it at all. Maybe he was like, because like,
I want to see you Monday morning. All right, I'm glad you
got home safe. I was like, oh man, what did I do?
(20:42):
No? You were you were good? Yeah. I remember once we
got back here, you had togo to the bathroom, so I walked
with you, and then as youwere coming out, you're like you're rambling
about something, and you just stoppedand looked at me and you're like,
you know what, I have toapologize to you. I was like,
yeah, because I'm not fucked upat all. You are. Is that
why I wanted to apologize to you? Yeah, because you, like you
(21:03):
said, you were all like,you can't be you can't be making a
scene, you can't be getting messedup. And here you go. It
wasn't you at all. But see, I feel like after a certain point,
you know your friends and you don'ttell me at all. Apparently.
No, I'm not saying I knowyou. I'm saying you know me.
You know how I am. Youknow I'm paranoid. You know I'm gonna
give you lectures, and you've cometo expect it, just like I know
(21:27):
what to get from Fancy. He'sgonna park downtown, but he's gonna complain
about it. I'm gonna tell himstop saying the F word, but he's
gonna continue to use it. I'mjust gonna believe him. I think it's
gonna be a lot funnier. Yeah, actually it would be funny. Is
it gonna be a lot funnier?But yeah, I just I've learned to
expect it, and I am tryingto get better again, thirty years old
(21:48):
now, trying to improve things.I could check upon you a lot more,
especially with all I think I probablyshould, because you're probably cursed.
You're probably a bad omen. Oh. Speaking of which, to keep with
the trend of me being on thepodcast after lative dies, my stepdad has
died since I was that's what I'msaying I was getting. I was getting
to the all the death, thedeath surrounds fancy, So I feel like
this would be a great way forhim to blow off some steam. Uh
(22:11):
So, how many relatives is thisdown? Um? I think let's see
one, two, three, six, Nope, five, five, So
I need one more because they saythey die in threes. So I need
one more this year because it wasmy two grandmothers uh a month apart,
and then two months later is myuncle who we've talked about the last podcast.
And then my boss's husband who Iwas kind of cool with, died
(22:34):
in January. And then my stepdad, who I mentioned the last time I
was here, who I had seenat Christmas time, who was getting pretty
bad with als He ended up dyingat the end of March. And uh,
yeah, a LS is pretty shitty, dude, it I've heard.
Yeah, if if you don't reallyknow what it what it all is,
because I was familiar with more thanjust a TikTok challenge, right, well,
(22:57):
you know what I was on vineback then they didn't do TikTok?
What was the als ice bucket challenge? John? Now? I think I
think it was fine. Yeah,oh god, and I didn't do it.
I was challenged to do it yearsago, and I didn't do it.
So I probably sealed his fate rightthere, a thinking you're better than
us. No, but so Ionly knew about it as much as literally
(23:18):
everybody else did from the ice Bucketchallenge and all that stuff. But it
basically, if you don't know,it eats your muscles to a point where
you lose your ability to speak,to walk, and then eventually your lung
strength is diminished so much that youbasically suffocate and die. Yeah. All
the while, it doesn't affect yourbrain at all, so you're still you
(23:38):
in your head, but you're goingto be basically a prisoner in your own
body. Yes, it's probably theworst way to die, I would imagine,
considering it doesn't mess with your brainat all, at least you know,
if it gave you dimension, it'slike, okay, well you don't
really know, but yeah, tobe a prisoner in your own body,
that would pretty much sun. Hewas in pain most of the time.
Don't really help. He was tryingsome experiment and told things I guess for
(24:00):
a few months, and my mom, bless her heart, was like taking
him to like Rhode Island, tolike specialists and shit. But luckily he
never got to the point where hewas even in a wheelchair. His speech,
his speech was getting very hard tounderstand him. But in March he
got pneumonia and he was in thehospital. He yet, he was pretty
(24:22):
bad, and my mom was like, oh, we don't know if he's
gonna make it, And honestly,I was thinking, it's probably the best
way to go now before he getsreally fucked up and unable to do anything
for himself, you know. Butthen he started to get better, so
I was like, Okay, wellhe's gonna get better. But then his
health took a turn again, liketwo weeks after being in the hospital,
and he just went down the tubeslike overnight, and he started to refuse
(24:45):
treatment and told ready to go exactly, he was just done. So he
told my mom that he didn't wantany more treatments and he wanted to be
taken home that night, and thedoctors were like, well, we got
to take you back to because hewas in rehab. They were like,
we got to take you back tothe hospital first, you know, to
you know, look at you.But he was like, no, not
(25:06):
going to the hospital. I wantto go home. So they pulled a
bunch of strings and ship to makesure that the ambulance took him home.
And you know, they said abouta hospice bed and all that, and
he died that night that he wenthome. Oh so he knew. So
yeah, he was ready, man. So I guess it's it's like he
willed himself to go before he knewthat he would not have any quality of
(25:27):
life, because like I said,I I'd see him at Christmas and he
was able to walk, like shuffleshort distances without the walker even but it
was very hard to understand him.And he I guess he had a tube,
implanet in a stomach for him todo like some type of injections and
stuff to try to slow progress.Yeah, so he had like a tube
(25:47):
and yeah, it's still yeah,so yeah, he uh, he willed
himself to go. So I hopeif if I'm ever in that position,
I would be strong enough to justbe like, you know what I'm done.
Do you not have those conversations withyour family, because I know we
we've talked about and obviously my family'svery close knit and we're not looking for
anyone to die, but uh mymom did my mom say? She's like,
(26:08):
oh, don't worry about it,like uh buying an expensive coffin put
me in a box. I'm dead, And I'm like, well, obviously
I want to get you like agoal. I want to masole. I'm
like, I want to go outin style. Yeah. See I used
to think that way, but thenyou got to think about it. Ah,
it's expensive. Beat, Yeah,you're putting a lot of burden on
your family. Well, plus,Beat, nobody comes to visit my ass
hardly now, and I have acool ass house. Ain't nobody going to
(26:30):
come to my fucking grave and plantsome flowers and shit for every year?
You know? So it's eventually it'sjust going to be all run down and
gross. So no, I don'twant that shit either. It's a waste
of land. So no, Iwant to be you know, cremated,
and I want to make a plastermold of my dick and that way everybody
who loves me can put a littlebit of my ashes in a dildo,
(26:51):
and that way I can still fuckthem for all eternity. I think that's
quite romantic, don't you think.Sure that's been before I'm sure that's probably
been done. That probably has actually, but yeah, that's my plan.
I deal. I'm sure a matterof fact, I'm sure that was like
a thing there. There was anews story years. Yeah, there was
ago about Yeah, that lady.I think she was going into Dubai or
something like like. The was like, what's this and that's like that's my
(27:11):
boyfriend's ashes or some ship in abutt plug? I think, yeah,
that's what it was. A buffalug. It was a buttlug. God,
my boyfriends always up my ass.Wow, that's a way to stay connected
forever. That that is some fetishstuff. Like I there when I went
to get my first horrible tattoo whenwhen I was sixteen, there was a
guy in there in the shop.Uh, and he was like he had
(27:32):
his hair. He had hair allthe way down his back. And I
was thinking to myself, I'm like, wow, this guy is really dedicated
to his ponytail. But I soonfound out that it was the hair of
all his dead friends. What thehair? That is what I was told.
It's the hair of his all ofthis. Okay, that's what you
were told. Who told you this? The tattoo? Or is that he
said that worked in the shop.He said, this dude comes in here
(27:53):
every day. His ponytail is weall the hair weaved into it is the
hair of all of his dead friendends. Um, he has a lot
of dead friends. Apparently, hewas like the fuck He said that kid
has a lot of problems. Hesaid, kid has a lot of problems.
I was like, wow, yeah, that's a that's an understatement.
You have enough hair to weave tomake, you know, for it to
(28:15):
go down. It was past hisbutt. He had like a rocky my
via ponytail was involved on that.So yeah, he's like, this kid
has a lot of problems. Butyeah, I just yeah, Well I
feel free, fancy. I feellike you don't get a release, and
you do have a really cool basement. I know you refuse to come over.
I don't refuse to come over.When When was the last time I
(28:36):
refused to come When was the lasttime you roll over? When was the
last time I was invited? Oh? You've been invited several times for parties.
Oh now I'm tired and ache.But you think I'm lying when I
say that sounds like excuses to me. I have gigs on weekends, I
have I mean my weekdays are don'tforget about it, so too busy for
Pride. Yes, I'm booked onPride, leaving as homos behind. I
(28:57):
see see I didn't say m Yeah, I mean gays need pay. I
mean you can. The older Iget, the more I realize this.
Yeah, I'm gay for pay.So I mean I will, I will
go. I have no problem going, but I was booked first. How
unprofessional is that? I'd like,I'm sorry, I'm going to Pride bring
(29:18):
about your wedding, but well theyhave to let you because I mean,
you can make a stink about that, you know, like showing the hate
when never saithing like man protests weddingto go to Pride exactly. Yeah,
No, I'm good, I've doneit in years past and that and that's
great. But what I am freefor I'm busy that weekend Columbus Pride.
(29:40):
Oh actually went? When is that? So it's June? It's the following
weekends. I think that's June seventeenth. And if I'm not mistaken, I
think my boyfriend has a graduation partyfor his niece, so I will probably
have to make an appearance there,but we don't go for the parade anyways,
go for the Colubs should I haven'tbeen a Columbus since with you.
(30:02):
That's been four years, five yearsyears. We almost never went to any
other city. It was the onlyhotel that wasn't bucked. And after you,
there's a reason, after the hotelyou picked in Las Vegas. I
don't want to hear about my choosinganything. First of all, the hotel
Las Vegas is supposed to be noisyand you're supposed to not get any sleep
there. I didn't have a placein the ghetto. I had a place
(30:22):
that was like very busy strip wherepeople get shot. Yeah, that's cool.
People get shot everywhere in Las aboutThis place specifically was empty because you
think if it was cheap and itwas a good place to be, days
wouldn't be all over it. Well, everything was booked up, dude.
They were sun tanning outside Windy's.That means I think it's safe. I
was. I had never ever inmy life been cussed out by an Uber
(30:47):
driver before. I didn't understand it. Like I he said, Okay,
you said, oh I booked theroom, you call the Uber. I
said, okay, that's fair,I'll call the Uber. Call the uber
sitting there waiting, wait and waiting, and in the guy see ride ride,
Uh what is it called? Ridecanceled And then I was still charged
five dollars because it was like afterfive minutes. And then like I he
(31:11):
said a message like no way,man, screw you, like in my
message cause I'm like, I'm gettingcussed out through uber messages, Like how
is that a thing? Well,he probably thought it was a setup or
something like he rolls up and thenyeah, he probably looking back on I'm
like, oh, yeah, hedefinitely thought he was going to a setup
because it was behind the Windy's allthe way down the road, which actually
doesn't make that much sense because I'msure if you could if you went to
(31:33):
like the castle, was like,hey, the guy that called an uber
jumped me. They can just trackyou know, your Uber account, Like
that's yeah, but criminals don't careabout being tracked. But they're like,
oh being charged, yeah, butlike whenever, and so yeah, I
got cussed out there. And thenthe second uber, the second ride I
call the girls, pulls up.She's like get in. She just like
(31:56):
kicks open the door, get inright up, come on, come on,
And then she's like, what areyou guys doing? It was almost
like we were in like a combatmovie where she was like trying to dodge.
She said, what are you guysdoing here? Do you know where
you're at? I was like,uh, Columbus, if you were,
if you were called, I wasn'tworried because I was strapped. I brought
two of that night, so Iwas. I wasn't in the room.
You didn't bring it with you topride, I know because I was wearing
them tight, so I had noplace to put it. Yes, because
(32:17):
you shocked your balls off. Iwish I had a vagina would have shoved
it up there like it was.It was ridiculous. She said, do
you know where you're at? Isaid, Columbus. She said, no,
you're in West Columbus. You said, you see that chick over there
that's freaking out at that gas station. She was just quick last week.
She's crazy. She was screaming toherself. She's like this is She said,
I wouldn't walk my dog in thisneighborhood. She's like, you guys
(32:38):
better be careful. I said,this dude over here booked the room.
Um, and I swear I hurtknocking at night. Yeah, because you
you called you. That's that's whenyou got drunk at the bar and like
passed out, literally laying on thebar at the bar. And then you
said that you had some hook upcoming to the room. So I did,
did I said I had back tothe room. Yes, that was
(32:59):
probably the pound. No it wasn't. You said you you were setting something
up, but then you passed out. If I honestly, if I had
a hook up coming to the room, like I, if I had a
hook up coming, I would haveprobably went to his room, because that's
why I used to do. Iused to room poach. I think you
mentioned that that was the original plan. That was the original plan. So
he admitted that was the original plan. That I told you that probably going
(33:20):
down that I always used to roompoach. I had never ever booked a
room for Pride before all Gay's roompoach. If you can't afford a room,
you go down there, you hookup with a guy, and you
sleep in his room. I havedone that for years, and thank god,
nothing ever happened. Actually, themost that happened at night, Joe
got too drunk and pissed on Iremember, did he Yeah, he fell
(33:40):
asleep and he pissed. He pissedthe bed. I think he pissed on
your side. He ain't pissed onmy side. I ain't. Yeah,
it makes sense, yeah, abit, because whatever you you two were
probably cuddling with each other and Iwas probably way on the corner. Well,
actually, do do we have Ithink we had two beds anyway?
No, we didn't. Oh wedidn't. We had one bed because I
think lucky son, because I thinkI nudged you when I heard that.
(34:01):
When I heard the knocking, Iheard No, you probably nudged Joe and
scared the piss out of him.Maybe No, that that was nuts.
That was I guess an experience thatI damn right, we're gonna do it
again, baby, I'm not doingthat, not that part again. You
booked the room? No, haveyour gay faced boyfriend booked the room?
(34:22):
I probably will, but do thatif he well, I think he's probably
gonna drive down there for like theday. Yeah, because he has the
graduation parties. I don't know howlong he wants to stay to that.
But again, all I want todo is the drag bars, the gay
clubs, and then maybe brunch Sundaymorning, So I don't care about that.
But you talk about brunch now untilyou end up drinking till like three
(34:45):
thirty on brunches all day when it'sPride, Like, what are you talking
about that gays invented brunch? No, I think they have a set time
if you're gonna do like the actualdrag brunch thing. I think it's a
set time. Well whatever, it'sPride weekenders of that entire week, we
can make use of it if wewant to. I remember I was talking
to some Oh, you were somad about this guy there that was like,
(35:07):
oh, why did you hate himso much? You're like, he's
just so still. Yeah, hewas so drunk, obnoxious and he kept
saying pizza, very strange. Hewas so hot, like he was.
I still followed that guy on Instagram. I don't even remember what he looked
like. I just remember he waslike a dumb jock, stupid a face
fuck, Oh my god, allright, all right, tell us what
(35:30):
you really feel? Yeah, thatwas that was. That was probably like
the drunkest I've ever been at Pridethe other ones. I actually know that's
not true because the next year Iwent, and I went with my roommates,
and I don't even think we didn'thave a hotel, did we.
I don't think we did. Ithink we drove down there for the day
(35:51):
and then drove back. Jesus,I don't remember us having a hotel.
Maybe I was too drunk. Ohno, yes we did. Yes we
did. We had a hotel,but it was by the airport, so
it was a far farther drive down, so we didn't really have access to
the downtown like we did before whenwe were on the West Side. I
was like, oh, wow,we're on West eighteenth Street. That's so
close to downtown there. But yeah, we did go down there and I
(36:15):
fell asleep at one of the tablesthat they had outside access. Is that
like just what you do apparently,but I didn't know that's what I do.
You don't know until you get it. Was like it wasn't even like
a midnight yet. Because you starteddrinking in the room. I was like,
dude, are you sure you wantto do it? I'm fine,
No, I think no, becauseyou were forcing me to drink that I
wasn't for you. I think Iwas on medication at that time. I
was like, yeah, you werefor yearsiasis shit, yeah. I was
(36:36):
like, I have I'm on medicationright now, so I got to protect
my liver and so I can onlyhave one strong one. That you were
doing shots in my uv blue inthe room and I was like that nasty
stuff, and I said, dude, mixing now, I don't want to
mix. I drink no, seriously, you were like I drink harder stuff
in and then yeah midnight clip.Yeah it was real, real fun for
me. Yeah okay, and thenyeah because I did false sleep in the
(36:59):
bar. Yeahs at the bar andthose getting talked to by a bunch of
chicks because he's so adorable. I'mstanding there like my dick in my hand,
like, oh, this is fun. Picture that you sit me A
Joe shirtless was really hot. Idon't he doesn't, think, he said,
but whatever he could he could belike he works out for like three
hours a day, Dude, he'sinsane, and then he wonders where the
time goes? Why does he workout that because he's insane? Does he
(37:19):
want to He should do like sometype of modeling. He doesn't have to
do like a I don't know howtall he is, but he could do
like a commercial modeling or something he'sstarting to do, like drag shows.
I guess I know, But likehe got that hot body, he's not
going to show it off. Idon't understand. Well again, like I
said, I know the picture you'retalking about, the picture with his shirt
open. He looks perfect, Yes, and his face is perfect. He's
(37:40):
perfect eyebrows and a and he tecksand he texts me back, I don't
even look good there. Oh,I hate him too. I sacrifice for
months trying to achieve him. Idon't even have abs yet. I got
upper torso, I got upper bodystrain. I'm faster, but he's he's
got the dream body. He's anasshole, not a pimple or award,
(38:00):
not one. I hate him.Yeah, I hate him too. I'm
gonna talk to him next time,saying I'm like, you should do some
modeling. Let me be your amanager. I'm ugly. He don't even
look good. Yeah, he atleast started only fans, sure, or
not even only fans. What didthey call it? Well, I don't
know, just a certain type ofmodeling. Just a Twitter account? Yeah
(38:22):
you all Twitter? So? Umdo you have the consistent um F boy?
Well, I still got Mason aroundthat's what I mean. I didn't
want to say his name if hewasn't relevant. No, yeah, yeah,
he's still yeah. Well see Iremember I was his first, so
I think he still Literally I said, why do you still put up with
me? He was like, asyou were my first. I was like,
oh, that's the reason. Kay. Thanks, It's like I thought
(38:43):
there would be more to that together. What we're what? You guys don't
live together or anything? Oh no, remember I'm still living with Joe.
I'm paying four hundred a month.And then and then, oh yeah,
I remember. I wanted to cushyou out because you put me in this
mother a group thread with like nineteenpeople about what when you got your new
phone? Oh my new number,dude, I clicked the box that says
(39:07):
send it separately, and it stilldoesn't. It didn't do it. It
didn't listen. So I wanted tomurder you. I was like, I
was like, what is this?I was like why? And I thought
it was control. I'm like someone, I literally thought someone hacked your phone
because I'm like, why would youhave a different number? And she's like,
ha, hi, it's fancy.And then like the way you were
talking and the way your friends wereresponding. I said, oh, this
(39:28):
is definitely fancy for sure, exactlybecause I was like, there's no way
you would have friends that would talkthat greasy to you. I was like,
wow, I'm not the only whenit talk to Fay like that,
They're like, oh my gosh,please delete me. Ill You're grow They
were like, oh my gosh.Oh I'm gonna read them. That's what
I'm gonna read. Oh god,you still have them? I think so.
I really I don't delete it much, and I think I mute it
thread because it was going off likeall day. But it was just like
(39:51):
it was Inbruary. Yeah, dude, I delete text almost every three or
four days just to like save space. I guess I don't really need to
Where where is it? Where is? They really weren't that good. I
might have, but it was justthe way people were responsed. I was
like, damn, fancy, ain'tgot no friends. Let let it be
nice as this guy it was okay, me and eighteen other people, and
(40:13):
it said Hey, it's fancy.This is my new number. Save it
And people were like wtf and theywere like, how'd you get this number?
Nah? I'm good? Why justremove me from this, and and
someone commented back, I'm here forthe comments, he said, and said,
it's not me. I'm not here. Someone said, who the F
is this? Someone said I neverbothered to save the old one. Literally
(40:37):
no, no, I said,I never bother saved the old Sam,
because who would send me pictures ofthree midgets hall tied, asked him,
and human centipede style with pig earsglued on them, with furry dresses and
wiley coyote drooling over them with utensilsand a strap on at five am.
Honestly, it's better than morning paper. That's that's a very creative images that
(41:00):
Sam depicted. I hope it's Iwonder if it's real out there. Someone
say, get me off, getme out of this chain. I'm going
to block this, like it justwent on and on. This was like
all day. It was like threehours. Oh fancy, you need a
friend? I know. That's whyI'm saying, why why would I bother
(41:22):
being buried? And hope people visitme when I'm dead. People don't visit
me one on the lives, SoI make I make my house awesome and
nobody cares, So okay, fuckeverybody, Seriously, it's Pride month and
you do not deserve to be depressed. You get thirty days. Well,
du pandering to you. Since there'sgonna be such a long gap in between
us recording and you broadcasting, I'mgonna have like three or four more relatives
(41:44):
die by then, so we're gonnahave to do this again. Maybe you
can do it. I'm not goingto participate, but you can do a
seance on the podcast and then seeif you can channel them because I won't
be Yeah, we could, Iput have you been Have you ever seen
like a psychic or anything? Neverdone that? That seems like something you
(42:05):
would do all the all the deaddolls and stuff that are possessing your basement
and you don't have anything. No, I've never seen a psychic. I
will say. Back when I waslike in high school, I drank the
Sylvia Round kool aid from Montell.Okay, we talked about this on a
pass on a pass, Yeah,so yeah, I drank. I drank
her kool aid for a while.I went and saw that bitch twice.
(42:27):
I gave her a hug and everything. You really believed her? Yeah,
well she sounded good at the time. She was pan have something to believe
in. Man, you gotta havesomething to believe in. But yeah,
so this was this podcast was essentiallyjust to update everybody and what's been going
on in our lives. More deathand destruction, more death and destruction.
But you're quite entertaining when you tellit. So at least, why else
would I be here? I was, so at least you have that going
(42:51):
for you. There's some people thathave death and destruction and they're dead boring,
and that's not you. Fancy andboring don't go in the same sentence.
Actually, uh, you know youwant to wrap up. Probably you're
good. But back in March,I actually had an STD scare. But
at least it was a scare exactlyheartch You want to guess which one you're
gonna be care of? Uh gonnagonna pacificis Come on, be realistic,
(43:15):
no idea, Come on, justguess one. Herpies Nona no syphilis.
YEPI are closely related. I swearbecause I when I went to go get
an STD test, it said,uh, gonna syphilis slash syphilis Nona lamydia.
Oh damn it, you're right,Okay, someone who gets tested all
(43:36):
the time I'm gonna take your wordfor it. I should have known better
considering my my primary practitioner is aninfectious disease doctor. Yeah enough. Well
then, but yeah, I thoughtI had a little thing going on and
I was like, oh, betterget a blood test. But it wasn't
so okay. Well, by thenext time we probably record, I probably
won't have it. You might haveanother scare that'll be a tease. Where
(43:58):
can they find you? In thenon biblical sense? Twitter tie the by
guy and U Instagram? Uh tieMercury excellent. Yeah, I haven't done
anything with the only fans in awhile, so thinking about it, But
you know, Mason's hesitant, andif I'm trying to get people to look
at it, I need Mason's abs. Mason has no life, he's got
(44:19):
no job, he doesn't have hislicense. So it's like, dude,
go make some money and do thisif he doesn't want to do anything,
because it's out of it forever.Like so what he's hot, Well,
I better be a mortified online whileI'm still hot. Then, you know,
looking like you know Jack Nicholson,Now you need his abs? I
know, yeah, you need hisabs? All right? Well, you
guys know where to find me RadioCody b Twitter, Instagram, TikTok,
straight across the board. Obviously youcan find this podcast wherever you get your
(44:43):
podcast I Heeart Radio, wherever elseyou get your podcast it but it'd be
iHeartRadio. Um. But yeah,so that is it for me. Thank
you fancy for coming in always firston such short notice, even though it
was like a week and you werebegging, he was itching to get it.
Oh, it was I need somethingto do. M hmmm. And
that guy's is my pound tic
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