Ron Goes Viral On Tik Tork

Bazinga! Ron becomes a Tik Tok influencer and changes the world. 

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Ron Podcast. It's fun back again, coming at you, damn son.
It's another episode of the Roun Bagary podcast. We out here,
Let's do this forty minutes of NonStop it's commercial free
coming up and remember to say the phrase it pays

(00:21):
and you have a chance of winning one million dollars,
can we Ron? Why are you talking like that? Like
like talking like everything you just said. Also the way
you said it, it's like you're trying to bring some
high energy radio announcer vibe to our opening. So you

(00:41):
picked up on that. It was very hard not to. Yes,
I picked up on it. Well good because that's exactly
what I was trying to do. Oh okay, you've got
a good here for broadcasting, Carolina. In truth, I'm just
trying to switch things up. I was listening to some
current top forty radio DJs and I thought, Wow, these
guys are shot out of a cannon, and maybe I

(01:04):
should try that style on and see if it fits.
So you heard it for yourself, and I think we
can both see that it fits like a glove. The
Ron Burgundy Podcast NonStop Music, The hits you want, the
way you want them. Boom Wait, we will think nim
ming bing ming bing. Let's let's just cool it for

(01:29):
a second. High energy. You are, You're shot out of
a cannon. We got it, You're my father. It's very
powerful and cinematic. Listen, Carolina. I will not apologize for
trying to be innovative with this program. I just think
people want more like the real Ron Burgundy. They want

(01:50):
the comforting voice that they've listened to for years. I
can't argue with you on that, Carolina. I just I
just sometimes feel part of being a good broadcaster is
learning to evolve with the times. I agree, Yeah, you
have some sympathy for that viewpoint, don't you sure. I
think that's very important. I'm sure there's a minority of people,

(02:14):
and I'm talking a very small group, maybe five or
six people who think Ron Burgundy isn't up to speed
with the world these days. I mean, you still say
the word jugs, So yeah, I'm never gonna not say that.
But you know, look, they take a look at me
and assume that guy, yeah, he's on the wrong side
of history. I'm aware I speak and look a certain way,

(02:35):
and I want to distance myself from a lot of
my so called peers who've shown a lot of ignorance lately. Wow,
that's actually very observant and self aware. And I'm sorry
to be, you know, sappy, but when you speak like that,
I'm I'm proud of you. Ron. Well, thank you, Carolina.

(02:57):
You know, the other day I was talking to another
broadcaster who shall remain nameless, but let's give him a
pseudonym just for this conversation, which will be Tucker Carlson.
Do you know what a pseudonym is? You might want
to just go with John Doe or say Mr or
Mrs X. No, everyone does that. I'm more creative than that.

(03:19):
You know. I made up a totally fake name, Tucker Carlson. Ron,
there's actually a broadcaster named Tucker Carlson. No really, Yes,
I literally just pulled that name out of thin air.
Tucker Carlson. What does he do? Local weather somewhere. No,
he's he's pretty famous. Unfortunately, is he a child actor

(03:40):
who dresses as a cowboy? Anyway, for the purposes of
this conversation, the person I was talking to was fellow broadcaster,
not the child actor who specializes in westerns Tucker Carlson.
I never said he was a child actor. I think
that's just something you assumed the point is I'm talking
to Tucker Carlson end quotes on the phone, and he

(04:02):
started going off on pronouns, saying, Oh, I can't keep
track of it. These people are constantly changing the language,
and I can't keep up men or men and women
or women. And I said to Tucker Carlson, just hold
it right there. You're being ignorant. Shame on you. If
we weren't on the phone, I'd Sluggy in the face
for being so closed minded. Wow wait a second, I'm sorry.

(04:24):
I just can't believe that sentence just came out of
your mouth. It's really amazing. I mean, you've evolved so
much ever since you accidentally stormed the capital. Yes, who
would have known that my accidental the story of the
capital would become a moment of enlightenment. You love crowds,
love a crowd, but a lot of people would never
assume this about you. Well, thank you appreciate that. But

(04:46):
let me continue, I said to Tucker Carlson, which again
is a pseudonym. I said, Tucker. If a person wants
to identify as a he, she, whatever you call it,
that is none of your business. They are people and
served to be treated with the same dignity as you
and me. So that's how I put it. And with that,
I'll be signing off today, folks. This is Ron Burgundy. No, Ron,

(05:11):
I'm just getting my jacket. We've only been here for
like four minutes. We just got here. Are you serious?
I could have sworn I was. I was here for
three hours. Look, you haven't even had a sip of
your coffee yet. Oh in that case, please the show
must go on. Anyway, we were discussing how you are
becoming an ally. Yes, yes, Caroline, and I know I'm

(05:32):
I'm out of touch in a lot of ways. I
admitted I have a lot to learn, and I want to.
I really want to. I want to be a better
ally in the world. And and that's why on today's show,
I'm going to ask you, as a young person, to
help me with something very important. Okay, now, no, it's
not bad. Okay, what is it? I want you to
teach me how to get famous on TikTok? I'm sorry,

(05:55):
how is you getting famous on TikTok going to help
with any of those things? Like? Well, I think it's
just a chance to reach out to a new young demographic.
I think we've we've done some of that here on
the podcast. Also on a personal level, I finally learned
a lot by listening to young people. Sure, and the
young people they're they're all on TikTok. Did you just

(06:16):
say tiktork? Wait? Is it TikTok or TikTok? Whichever one
is right? That that's the one I just said, it's
it's TikTok. Al right, Well, when we come back from break,
a two hour break, Carolina is going to show me
the ins and outs of TikTok. We have fifteen minutes,
and by the end of this episode, Ron Burgundy is
going to go viral. I don't even have TikTok installed

(06:37):
on my phone. You don't have it all ready. I
don't use it. Oh. I thought you were a cool
young person. You're what thirty one? Wait, you're turning thirty
one in May. Yeah, my gosh, I can't believe you
remembered my birthday. I saw it on your driver's license
when I was going through your purse. Are you serious?
And I thought, I gotta remember that. It's the nice

(06:59):
thing to do. You need to stop going for my
purse for candy and snacks. I keep telling you there's
no food in my purse. No, I was just seeing
if you had a diary. What are you serious? Yes, well,
I don't know why. I'm I don't know why I'm
telling you so much right now? All right, let's take
a break and then you can make me viral on TikTok.
I don't know if this is going to be possible.

(07:21):
I'll do my best. Back in the flash with the
Rot Burgundy podcast podcast podcast podcasts so annoying. We're back

(07:46):
on the Ron Burgundy Podcast with me as always as Carolina,
and today on the show Carolina. This is gonna be fun.
It's gonna teach me how to become famous on TikTok.
I'm okay. Disclaimer, I rarely used to talk, and I
don't think you actually need to do this to connect
with a younger audience. There's so many other ways. But

(08:06):
here's the thing. TikTok just seems fun, you know, it
just seems like fun. And so what if Silicon Valley
wants to collect all my personal information? My life is
an open book, not unlike your purse. All right, do
you have the app loaded up? Yes, it's all set,
So what do you want to do I want to
go viral? I'm sorry, was I not clear about that yet?

(08:28):
You can't just make something go viral. It has to
be interesting or news worthy, you're cute or funny. It
has to happen organically. I think all I'm gonna need
to do is get on there and do a fun
dance and then blam, Oh I've got millions of followers. Yeah,
but you're a journalist, You're I don't know. I mean,
do you really want to reduce yourself to dancing on TikTok?

(08:51):
My decision is vital, and this is about connecting more
with young people and hearing what they have to say
to make the world a better place. Right. I mean,
that's part of it, because if that's something you're truly
interested in doing, I can actually put you in touch
with some great organizations, Mutual aid projects, nonprofit Carolina. I

(09:12):
need you to hold the camera while I do the
fun tiktork dance. I've been practicing in my den for
a week, So that's what this is really about. You've
been working on this, you know, and a lot of
people know this. I'm an excellent dancer, Okay, but here's
the thing I'm afraid that if we do make a
TikTok of you dancing, then it will go viral. Perfect,

(09:34):
That's what I'm saying. No, but I think it could
go viral and um the wrong way. Listen, if I
get the clap from dancing, it won't be the first time.
What I'm trying to say is you could end up
with people laughing at you, not with you. And I
mean no, I don't understand what. Why would people be
laughing at all? There's nothing funny about my dancing. The

(09:56):
art of dances is not a laughing matter, because you
know I'm cla sickly trained. There just might be something
inherently funny to people about seeing Ron Burgundy dancing. I
can do ballet, jazz, tap, modern hip hop, dancer size that.
Do you remember that I went with you to your
ZOOMA class at the Y. Yeah, they asked you to leave.
I've worked very hard on my craft and I don't

(10:17):
see how anyone could find that the least bit funny.
People just know you from a different contexts, and I
want to show them this side of me. Do people
laugh while they're watching Dancing with the Stars. No, Never,
They watch people dance and the cream rises to the top. Yeah,
are you trying to get on Dancing with the Stars? Wait?

(10:39):
What are they asking? No? Right, yes, I haven't gotten
the call. But but it's not like I'm waiting by
the phone. I barely even care at all. Okay, I'm
just starting to add some stuff up. Add what up?
I don't owe you any money. I put the wallet
right back in your purse. Ron, did someone from Dancing

(11:02):
with the Stars tell you if you got a following
on TikTok, they might consider having you on the show.
Is this what it's all about? If? And I'm saying,
if a conversation took place along those lines, that would

(11:27):
be confidential dancer to producer confidentiail. But I will say
I did have a conversation, and let's say someone may
have said it may increase my chances of getting on DWTS,
that's Dancing with the Stars. Yeah, look, are you going
to film my TikTok? Dnswer? What? Because I can find

(11:50):
someone else to do it. I just just thought you
would know how to make me look flattering. I trust you,
Thank you, Ron, And in the interests of that trust,
I would like to talk to you off the air
about this. Well, like I said, my life is an
open book. But if we have a commercial lined up,
I suppose we could do that and then talk privately.

(12:10):
If we don't have a commercial, we can just move
away from the mics and whisper. Let's just talk the
dancing with the stars of it all through privately. Okay, alright,
fair enough, back in a moment with information on how
you can see my awesome dance moves on TikTok. This
is Ron Burgundy. Bazinga. What's bazinga? It's it's a cool
word I saw on a TV show to I wrote

(12:32):
it down as soon as I heard it. I don't
think you're using it in the right context. Well, it's
still a cool word, bazinga. We're back here on the

(12:52):
Ron Burgundy Podcast. Carolina and I just had a heart
to heart and she really made a compelling argument. Thank
you so much for just really listening to me there. Yeah. So,
and people are used to seeing Ron Burgundy behind a desk,
seeing me tackle hard hitting news stories, become a trusted
source of information, and in these uncertain times we're living in,

(13:15):
personalities like myself are rare commodities. I'm so glad you've
thought this through. That's why I've made the difficult decision
two ignore Carolina's advice and film a really fun dance
for TikTok Boo. Yah. That's right, I'm the slum Dog Millionaire. Baby.
I'm sorry this you're saying the Year of the slum

(13:36):
Dog Millionaires. That's some DJ name. Well, I just said it.
I honestly don't know where that came from. It's an
Academy Award winning picture from two thou Oh. I I
don't know, Caroline. I'm just amped up and it came
out of my mouth. Sue me. All right, let's move
on and film. That's That's not the first time I've
said that. Today. I also filmed Baxter's piano recital. Let's

(13:58):
just get this over with. Terrific, Okay. So I've worked
out a little routine to a d Alipa song. Now,
I don't know if we can get the rights to
the du Alipa song for the podcast, so we need
to cover our basis. Well, we'll do one version where
we play the actual song and I dance to it,
and one where you sing it and I do my awesome,
mind blowing TikTok dance. Okay, I'm just gonna send an

(14:21):
open apology to the legal team at I heart for
I mean a lot of stuff that went on an HR,
but also for having to work this out last minute. Sorry, guys,
let's do this, Carolina. I'm pumped up. Make sure you
get my entire body and frame. So which version do
you want to do first? The one with the actual
do Alipa song or the one where you sing it?

(14:42):
You know what do do? The one where you sing
it first? It's it's a good warm up. Okay, I
am thank you, Yeah, okay, okay, Now hit record and
start singing that d Alipa song I like and watch
me blow your mind with my moves. All right, recording ready? Ready? Okay, one,

(15:05):
don't pick up the phone. You know he's only calling
because he's drunken alone to don't let him in. You
have to kick him Matt again, okay, and cut? Did
we get it? We get it? We got something, hammy
your phone. Let me watch Blie back huh. Okay, yeah,
it's good. Right, it looks great. Hot hot, hot, he's hot. Okay,

(15:31):
that's you. Okay, now, okay, now let's do a version
with the actual song. You ready, these rights are probably
really expensive. She's like in a Grammy Award winning pop star.
That's that's fine. I'll pay up to one. It might
be a little bit more. I'm serious. Now, now press play. Okay,
Oh my god, are you okay? Whoa? Oh? Oh my god? Okay, okay,

(16:01):
let me just oh I'm fine, I find I can
continue to dance. I'll just I'll just need something to
number pain. You. Do you have any feting on you?
N No, that's dangerous. Let me just get you home
one second. Let me just delete this video first deleted?
Are you mad? Woman? Ouch? Got it in so much pain?

(16:22):
Upload it now? Upload the video. No, this is the
one where you're dancing to do Alipa and you fall
and hurt yourself. It'll go viral. Title it Ron Burgundy
do Alipa fail? Oh my lower back is as hot
as a Hendrix guitar lick? Does anyone to have access
to any painkillers strong enough to tear? Apart of family

(16:45):
painkillers that are so potently they wreck you financially and emotionally.
I want those. We'll be right back. Ye shooby doo

(17:07):
b d B do you here? I go? Here? We go, here,
we go again, girls, what's my weakness? Finn? Hey, he's
round berger Um. Thank you so much for listening today,
and thank you so much to our engineer Carl, who
works with Nick, who I always suspected had a drug problem,

(17:28):
and God bless him, I was right. I'm feeling much
better now. Okay, you're not on like a chill drug.
You're on fentanel, which literally destroys lives and we're suffering
from an opioid epidemic because of it. So please don't
try this at home. And Carl is going to get
treatment at a facility in West Palm Beach, Florida. Courtesy
if Carolina's Christmas bonus, I don't know. I think there's

(17:50):
another way for us to gather the funds. Carolina, how
many views are we up to on that tiki torch?
You're dualipa fail that oh is at one point two
million views on TikTok and also do a Leapa commented
l O L fantastic. Well, I think we learned a

(18:11):
lot today about young people and communication. It's it's very
important to listen to the youth because you never know
what lessons they might have to teach you. Also, do
not take addictive pain medication unless you really need it,
or you Ron Burgundy, and you deserve a little break
a Rooney, I guess you got what you wanted today.

(18:33):
You went viral on TikTok. Well, you just have to
understand the algorithm. I forgot to mention this earlier, but
I'm I'm up for a Pulitzer prize for a story
I did on early COVID one nine. Do you think
this TikTok will help her hurt? My chances is that
the fentanyl that you were up for a Pulitzer That

(18:53):
feels like it might be. If you keep this up,
you're going to go to Florida with Carl. I mean,
I honestly don't know. It's a crazy world. You might
be nominated for a pullit, sir, Yeah, crazy world indeed, sister.
Hey everybody, this is TikTok star Ron Burgundy saying goodbye
to our listeners this season. Uh yeah, I did good.

(19:15):
I would love to see Walter crunk I get that
many views online as fast as I did. I'm the
gold standard of journalism now and that should wipe that
grin off of his face. He actually he passed away
like over ten years ago. On second thought, does anyone
have any fruit cocktail? I would love some fruit cocktail Carolina.

(19:38):
Can we get fruit cocktail when you drive me home?
Just don't talk to me. Put another dime in the jukebox, baby,
I'm Ron Burgundy Buzzinger w