June 12, 2025 • 38 mins
Jana and Allan get a lot of questions about their relationship and it's time to clear up some rumors!
They open up about the outside perspectives of their marriage, and why they see strength in letting the world in on their relationship. And we get an inside look at how they knew early on that they had undeniable chemistry.
Plus, Jana discusses her struggles with imposter syndrome, and Allan sets some high expectations for Father's Day!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heeart Radio Podcast.
You've got your little blink, my blink, my slow blink
when I get tired. Yeah, I think it's salergies. I
think they're messing with me a little bit today in
the last couple of days, or it's because Roman was
not feeling one hundred percent, So I think maybe it
(00:23):
could be like a little piece of his bug or
something too. I was supposed to go out tonight with
some girls, but I don't think that's going to happen,
which is a bummer because actually it was like, oh,
I have a little girls night.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
It'd been fun, but we're supposed to go.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Uh when the neighbors were kind of talking about it,
and I'm like, yeah, that would actually be really fun.
I don't ever go out out. You know. They were
going to go to this cute little place in East Nashville.
But it's one of those where it's like even my
friend was like, they're gonna like one of our neighbors
is like super like she likes to like it's going
to be late and it's going to be you know, fun.
(00:59):
But I'm just like what I always leave or uber back,
But I already am like preparing my Hey, I'm not
feeling one hundred percent, which they probably all expect anyways,
I just you know, but this is because I just
think about how much it'll put me back for tomorrow
if I'm not feeling one hundred percent today, not having
a good night's sleep, Like I'm old. It's just what
(01:21):
it's coming down to. It's fine, everything is fine.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
You make the right choice.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
Yeah, no, I know. So Father's Day is coming up,
and it's one of those where it's so hard because
when you were like, I don't care, I'm like, I
know what I would want for Mother's Day, which is
I would like to have half and half. Well, I
mean this year was I was on a movie set,
(01:46):
so I couldn't really ask for for that because I
just wanted to be with the kids, and you guys,
since that was my only weekend seeing the kids for
those three weeks. In a way, well mine's the one
that I came home. But I digress. So I I
would like a half day at a spa and then
like come home to a dinner. Yeah, it's it's almost
(02:09):
because all the Mother's Day gifts are funny too. It's
they're like here you go. It's because we would actually
like a day oh I make up and from what
I've seen that we actually want to be away from
the kids on Mother's Day, like dads can go golfing
and do and then you know, so it's like you
guys have that on your Father's Day. That's where I
feel like a lot of dads do or they go
(02:30):
do like they want to go fish or like I
know Nick likes to go to the pond and stuff,
and so it's like we also don't want to be
it goes fresh and every week, right, it's a piece
of bad example, find what you mean? Yeah, So but
like for Mother's Day, that is like a dream Mother's
Day for me is a half and half where it's
like I go to a spa and maybe it's like
(02:51):
me and my girlfriends because we don't really get to
go together get together, and I think that's they'd be
nice if all of us moms went to like a spa,
that would be a dream and then come home to
a nice cook dinner from the husband, hang with the kids.
So that is like a dream Mother's Day that I've
never had.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
Like that, Oh you couldn't get this year because it
was in legs.
Speaker 1 (03:12):
And no the kids, Yeah, yeah, because I obviously want
to see them a part of it, but I also
would like to peace out too and be like pampered
mom mom day. So but with you, you know, the
last Father's Day we I think I was filming. Yes,
I was filming, So we went to dinner and stuff
(03:34):
and so yeah, that was on.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Troy was over.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Yeah that was so great. But this year he's you know,
he's not able to come over until you know, the
following week. So I'm curious and I asked you. I'm like,
what do you want to do? And you're like, does
motor Like we don't have to do anything? Like that's
not okay. I just told you my dream mother's day.
What would your dream Father's Day look like?
Speaker 2 (03:56):
My dream follow's day?
Speaker 1 (03:57):
I mean, obviously having your son over, but we know
that he can't is not the following week because I
have only a week or some and some change to
come up with something, and right now I got nothing,
literally nothing, And I actually mean this no, but you
know me, I know what you're about to say. That's
not a You're going to be like, we don't need
(04:19):
to do anything.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Well, we don't because we didn't do you know what,
I never get to just and never forget to just set.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
And you won't. That's the thing, you won't. You won't
just sit. Okay, Dream Father's Day go. But we have
to exclude the fact that we know that he can't
come till the following.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Okay, well, the fact that I know that he's coming
the following week has actually made my father's day. Don't
know he's coming there, I don't know how busy junas
from finishing one thing to then start another.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
So that's that's perfect. It's not perfect, but it's good.
Dream Father's Day would be having a lion.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Okay, okay, easy, okay, I get it right now. Notes
on that, yes, I do, because I have to not
be like guy sleep in. I would never I'm a lion.
Speaker 2 (05:15):
Wake up, wake up, and those.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
Coffee, coffee, eggs and turkey bacon.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
Yes, done, eggs and turkey bacon.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
Do I know my husband or do I know my husband?
The eggs, turkey bacon?
Speaker 2 (05:30):
Okay, okay, I think it would probably.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Ladies, listen up, I'm giving you a head head start
here with the men.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Want I'm not going to go and play like, I'll
think about something that I would like to do that
I don't normally prioritize I get to do like golf.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
Like golf, I need to make that reservation.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
No, you don't need to. So what I'm talking about
is I would I'd be happy just just going to
a driving range for an hour, smashing aut of one
hundred and fifty. Right, Okay, come back and have a
pool day with the kids, old day.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
What if it rains.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
If it rains, then.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
If it rains, fancy them all trip?
Speaker 2 (06:20):
Not really, No, I think. I think if it rains,
we're going to get lunch somewhere, a nice lunch somewhere, and.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Yeah, let's talk president. What would you like? Nothing I need, right,
and there's there's needs, and there's once or likes.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
I've already said to you it's.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
Something right, and you haven't sent me the link.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
I'm not sending you the link, so that that's fine.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
And anything else. Talking about soccer boots, so.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Yeah, up the football boots, their boots.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
That's right. I did say right.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Okay, you did say it right, Okay, so that would
be perfect. And then at the end, get the hyenas
to bed. Then I get to spend time with my
perfect wife. Can we watch a movie? Oh, we watch
more of that new series.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Of stuff that we'll finish it by then.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
Oh yeah, it's next week.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
Is yeah? Okay, Well that sounds like a fun father's day.
Then I love that. That'll be good. Anything else else
going on in your.
Speaker 2 (07:28):
Yes, it's been a busy week, A busy week. You
also new client, which is good. Yeah, big, big big.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
One, big big big one. We can't say because he
signed an NDA. That's how big.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Yeah, so he has agent called me and did some
work of the player and now we'll get discussion on
whether he comes into the comes into the program.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
It was one of those where I was like, We're
not being catfished, are we? I was like, how did
this agent reach out to you? Did he like d
M you?
Speaker 2 (08:01):
Did he like?
Speaker 1 (08:01):
Because I know you're like a big deal with striker
people and you do the analysis and but it's like
training the training programs, right, but it's you know, I'm
still like, I wonder because I mean, like I wrote you,
I wrote to your website thing will you marry me?
I also put my name to were Claire.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
So that was that was a good I mean, it
was hectic to get these analysis done in time for
a huge.
Speaker 1 (08:27):
For two days and you had we had we had
how many nights to get that done?
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Look at they and a half So two nights.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
Yeah, And it was like, hey, honey, I'm not going
to la And then you're like, well, I still need
to work until but I was it was great.
Speaker 2 (08:40):
That was good. So was the possible Saudi deal, which.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
We might be moving to Saudi Arabia, moving, but it's
a good part. Can you imagine if I called Mike
and was like, hey, can I move the kids to
Saudi Arabia? Listen. We had a hard enough time asking
about Chicago, so I think Saudi Arabia would have been
out of the question.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
So that's good. There's been a few zooms and calls
on that joint venture over there.
Speaker 1 (09:06):
Things are wheling and dealing.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
Things are wieling and dealing. And I've got a speeding
ticket this morning.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
He did get a speeding ticket. And I had to
remind you he's just doing his job and you were
in the wrong speeding when I.
Speaker 2 (09:22):
Take a beat, Yeah, I'm in the wrong. But this
guy appeared from nowhere.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
I was like, well, yeah, they're cops. They hide in
you know, places to catch people in this get people
on speeding because they're doing their job.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Yeah, everyone on that road is speeding, right.
Speaker 1 (09:41):
Well, I did say that. I was like, that guy
is for sure not going fifteen.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
I was trying to like the unlucky one.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
Yeah, and he's like, oh, trust me, I've already stopped
five people in the last thirty minutes. I'm like, this
is a tricky road and it just started construction, and
we were like, where's the twenty five mile per hour sign?
Speaker 2 (09:56):
I actually don't see any.
Speaker 1 (09:57):
There's actually a bunch. Yeah, there will be because he's
now that you'll now you'll see them.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
But listen, I'm in the wrong. I was gone over
the speed limit slightly, slightly. Oh it's normally a forty.
That road is normally a forty.
Speaker 1 (10:11):
It's actually not thirty five.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
Okay, So I was in nine miles an hour over
the limit twenty five. Yeah, but you said because of
the construction that's come down, which I never took notice
off anyway. So been a good week which ended in
the bloody speeding ticket.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
Time to go to driving school?
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Yeah, online, it's online. I don't need to go there
physical physically goal you.
Speaker 1 (10:38):
Got to go to court.
Speaker 2 (10:39):
The PTSD horrible, Yeah, yeah, okay, what were you a week?
Speaker 1 (10:47):
Yeah, you know, trains, planes and automobiles didn't didn't get
to where I need to be, so it's time. Oh good.
It was a reroute. I love. I love a good reroute.
That's the thing. I'm a big believer that, you know,
there was a reason why we were delayed, was the
reason why we didn't go, And it's okay. I always
think there's a greater plan within, you know, God's inner
(11:12):
workings of all that. Like maybe we would have gotten
into an accident. I don't know. There was just like
so many things where I I take those signs and
say that's where I wasn't. I wasn't meant to go
do that, so and that said where I kind of
always live within things. But yeah, I found you know,
I found it to be a good week.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
Movie.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
Yep, booked to movie. So excited about that and so well,
you know, because I always talk about on wine down too,
so it's like not trying to repeat you know what
I mean.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Yeah, fun questions.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
Did sexual chemistry or emotional chemistry come first in your relationship?
For you both.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
That's a good question because the sexual chemistry or emotional
care mystry comp That's a strange one because we spent
a lot of time talking on zoom before we actually met.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
FaceTime zoom face. We weren't having business.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
Sending your email was with a link here's the past one.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
When you're meeting my day.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
On zoom this morning, sorry, FaceTime.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
There is a difference, which is why I had to clarify.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
I appreciate that. I think, yeah, there was definitely sexual
sexual chemistry and emotional chemistry. I think there was that
even before we met, and then when we met, there
was it was definitely that.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
Yeah, yeah, I would say there was a definite chemistry
when we were facetiming, but it went beyond like a
sexual chemistry, because if I'm going to be honest, I
really didn't get the I was attracted to your FaceTime,
but it was it was a person in person. There
was I'm like, okay, I am attracted to this person.
It takes me a second. Then it was like an
(13:00):
instant in person, if that makes sense. Did you have
any hesitations moving so fast in your relationship?
Speaker 2 (13:18):
None?
Speaker 1 (13:19):
Well that was fast response.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
No, I know because I talked about it with someone
a couple of days ago.
Speaker 1 (13:25):
A couple of days ago yesterday, Who would you talk
to yesterday about it?
Speaker 2 (13:31):
Tell me?
Speaker 1 (13:34):
I mean, I know who if I looked at the
calendar exactly, what was it? What brought up about? That
came up about that we're talking to a mentor essentially, because.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
We're talking about the timeline of things of Roman before marriage,
and the question came up of how did I feel
about things being in that order and how quickly things
moved and straight out like zero concerns over it, zero doubts,
would never change any of it. So that's why I
(14:09):
answered that question so quickly on did we have any
hesitations on moving so fast? I had none because I
was I was sure, I knew things were We're.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Right, Yeah, I mean I think there was. I'll speak
to an episode that we posted last week. It was
on when we get into conflict, how you know you
try to push my buttons? And then someone had commented
in the wind down DMS, which I love people when
(14:43):
they love people's comments, whether good or bad. I always
kind of look at them both ways.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
And.
Speaker 1 (14:50):
They were basically like why, like maybe like you posting
this actually shows your really I can't remember exactly what
they said, but like, this isn't actually good that your
post this about it. And I kind of I looked
at that and goes, okay, we always said that we
wouldn't show weakness for our marriage, and I kind of
(15:11):
brought that up, was like, did we overshare on the
last episode talking about you know, how how we have
conflict and how sometimes you know, there is a budding
of like you want to like you have words that
come out that you don't want to say, you know,
and so, and I was like, did that did that
(15:32):
bring weakness out? Or does that show weakness in our relationship?
Speaker 2 (15:35):
That was a question.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
That's what I asked you in the car. I'm like,
because we always talked about not because they're like, oh,
if they're sharing this, imagine what's behind closed doors?
Speaker 2 (15:43):
Is that what the person said.
Speaker 1 (15:44):
In a way, yeah, I can't. I don't verbate them, remember,
because I I didn't really, you know, have much thought
into that. But when I was thinking about that, I'm like,
to me and what and I do remember responding in
a way, it's like, there is no perfect relationship, Like
you guys, I'm like, show me a couple that has
(16:06):
zero issues. Yeah, that has never fought, that has never
had a you know, a confrontation from maybe communication, or
that has said something they regretted saying, or like, show
me one relationship that's And to me, I'm like, I
find it healthy that there is conflict and that there
is not all the time, like it doesn't need to
(16:27):
be a constant where it's like it doesn't have to
be hard all the time, and that's not what it is.
And I also think there's what I said to them.
I was like, there's no perfect relationship and there's so
much growth in the work that we do and this
is like light years less than like what I had
in my previous you know.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Yeah, So you're going back to your question to me,
does it show too much weakness?
Speaker 1 (16:51):
No, I don't think it does. But I'm just saying, like.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
You know, I don't think so. I think it shows
an honesty. And I think the fact that there's no
relationship out there that doesn't have issues none. There's people's
perception of what issues might be, and there's people's perception
of what our lives might be based on what we
say on this podcast. But that's the that's their opinion,
(17:18):
and that's their perceptions only perception, because they're now thinking, oh,
if that's what they're sharing, then what's all the craziest
that's happening that they're not sharing when it's actually not
the case. We're actually sharing stuff that helps other people,
are being honest that these are these are the only
issues that we have. There's not underlying issues that creep
(17:38):
through the But it just shows you people's perception. Like
I got a shitty email from someone during the week
that's shared with you, which one someone had written to
me And I don't know if I could share this
on here, but someone had written to me on an email.
How can you go from I think I can share that,
yeah for sure. How can you go from England coach
(18:01):
to a household a house husband coaching kids? You must
have some bad karma. But that's that's somebody's perception because
I'm no longer with England, though they don't have a
clue what I'm doing in the background and what's going
on in the background and the clients I have and
the deals that I'm doing and other things that are
(18:21):
so it's just people's perception of our lives are actually
probably a lot different from what they actually think.
Speaker 1 (18:31):
Yeah, and I think too. You know a lot of
times people will be like, oh, he doesn't have a job,
like does Alan work like that? Those are a lot
of my questions that come in when I do my
Wednesday what do you want to know? Questions?
Speaker 2 (18:41):
Yeah, and it's like maybe I should, maybe I should
clarify to people what I actually do, and they'd be like, oh, wow, right.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
Okay, Well because your whole like when I met you,
you were coaching in Norwich, and because you haven't landed
a coaching like you you could have like that's the
thing that you could be an assistant coach in San Diego.
You could be doing set piece coaching here. And it's
like you have reworked what you want to do because
you've seen a benefit in other areas. And there will
(19:11):
be a time where you will if you want to
take that position again, right when the time is right,
you know, for you for everything, and so but people
don't it's like because you haven't late, it's not it's
like and do you have to like? But it's people's
perception is what's so funny. And then I had even
a comment yesterday I didn't even tell you this because
I wasn't feeling good yesterday. But and this has happened before.
(19:33):
I don't look at any of those hate pages and
people have I won't even give the name to it
because it's when they had when they had spoke. The
last time I looked on that hate page was when
they were saying that we lied about when Roman was born.
And then I'm like that and that's where I was
(19:55):
just like, and you know that we're still lying that,
you know, and someone said when I we were celebrating
Roman's year wedding, I'm sorry your birthday, They're like, well,
that's not actually the date per this page, and I'm
like in and I was like, in what world? Why?
Like why would I? And that's when I knew back then,
like I was like, they're like they're just reaching and
(20:16):
they're just trying to just you know, have their own
stories that they make up and inner workings of it all.
And so you know, they do that same thing about
your job, which is what filters in. And then they
also yesterday when I was saying how different this relationship
is and how I can trust you versus my past
relationships is you know, your words and actions they match
(20:37):
and and where you know, someone commented and said, oh,
but this page says that he's on dating apps, and
I ended up. Yeah. And now in the past, I
would have been like, show me the proof, like because
obviously that has was a trend, right, so like yeah,
(20:59):
but with this, I'm like, I laughed out loud, you know,
because they want to create issues in their own what
are those those? She and this girl's like, Unfortunately it's
like my trashy magazines. And I just said, question for
you though, if this was your life and we you know,
(21:20):
flipped this and people were writing this about you, very
untrue things, you know, how would that make you feel?
Because no matter, like it doesn't affect because I don't
look at it anymore. But of course I'm still human.
It still hurts. But no matter what I do, no
matter what you do, no matter if you have this
top client that it ends up you know, really doing
your program, They're still going to say he's a house
(21:41):
husband because that's the narrative that makes them feel better.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
Yeah. People will create their narrative based off their own
agenda and then negas have seen their own life.
Speaker 1 (21:51):
Like nothing I can do or you can do good
or bad. Are they're going to say, like, Okay, now
I like them, Like no, they they hate me, and
now they will be mean to you. And so I
I just to that point about moving fast, I mean,
you know, going into that, I mean there's things that
come up with other people's perceptions as opposed to ours.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
Yeah, and there's also the how you're supposed to do things,
traditional things how you and it's there's no see, as
long as you follow the boundaries and the core values
of your relationship, there's no there's no right or wrong
timing on things. That's absolutely not.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
I think you need to cover the basis of what's
important to you and if you people align. But I
don't see the point like when you know, like we
knew we wanted to try, there's to then be like,
all right, well let's date for two years and then
let's try. It's like that there're a there wasn't time
for that.
Speaker 2 (22:53):
But then also personally we wanted.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
I knew that you were my person when I met you,
and at that point I didn't care what anyone thought.
So and that's what I said to that person. I
was like, well, if he is good on him, ope,
his site's good and he'd be an idiot, but it's
all good. I know, so funny. But to speak on
(23:16):
that again, those just to just wrap that piece up
about it is you know, I think there is because
obviously I post the like finding love. There is that,
and I was just talking to someone else on another
podcasts and we were saying, like there, but there's also
things and issues and you have to work on communication,
and we're working on that, and I think that's that'll
(23:37):
only make our marriage stronger as opposed to not and
then having it faster for seven years and then we're
so disconnected. It's like I don't want that.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Yes, we are strengthening. People might see it as weakness,
and regardless, I don't really care. But we are making
sure that a foundations as strong as possible so that
we are for the next thirty forty fifty years. So
that's why we're doing the work right now rather than
being reactive. Yeah in ten years time and our foundation
(24:10):
is not as strong to go back on and actually
to be to be rigid on the co values and beliefs.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
But if you did have a dating app, like what
would the oh my god, if you do well played
it's actually upsurd, like well are you on hingebabe Riah?
Which one is the bumble?
Speaker 2 (24:33):
Yeah? All of them. If but for people to make that,
like the email that I got that, why do that?
Speaker 1 (24:40):
Because they like, why be.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
Nasty like that and have a perception of someone you
don't have a clue what they do just because you
don't see it. It would be good for people to
spend a week with us and then they'll be like,
all right, okay.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Yeah, Alan works. I mean I don't see you. You
were in your office, so you come out of the
office at four, but you have your clients. The analysis
I mean that is you do so much work. You're
not sitting playing video games and not working and not
like you work and hustle and your private training people
(25:18):
all the things and so so what it might be
some youth players okay, and you're growing something for you know,
but people you're not like I'm just gonna say, I'm
gonna call myself out. You're not like me. You don't
post things and be like this is what I'm doing today,
Like sometimes you do, like when you're Brian White scores,
He's the top scorer in the MLS and Hugo. They're
fighting your other client, who's the top scorer in the MLS.
(25:39):
You don't gloat like being like I'm now doing analysis.
I'm now doing you know, like I'm now training this
really huge player in Nashville. I'm you know, who's on
an MLS team? Like, you don't do that.
Speaker 2 (25:52):
Two PM, I have a deal with the Saudi conglomerate
to discuss a joint ventur licensing. I just don't do it.
That's not how I operate.
Speaker 1 (25:59):
Yeah, so people.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
Don't have a clue. But yeah, it would be good
for people to spend a week with us and be like, wow.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
Maybe we should do a day in the life real
for Alan on your page. There you go. Maybe people
need't see that my stay at home husband would you
would never be And some people are okay with that
and that's not your listen.
Speaker 2 (26:22):
For some men it's fine and that's and they're okay
with it. I just it's not how I could ever operate.
Speaker 1 (26:28):
Yeah, and I wouldn't want that for you either. Do
you guys align on music taste?
Speaker 2 (26:46):
Oh wow? No, no, no, I put up with yours
and you hate mine. I listen to house music and
you don't.
Speaker 1 (26:55):
Like it and you listen to I listened to Chill
Hits on Spotify. That's my jam, Chill Hits. It's a
really good playlist. I love it. It's chill. You listen
to music that gives me anxiety and panic attacks because
it's like pound pound pound pound pound, it's like house music.
I'm not a house music fan.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
Done. Yeah, okay, So.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Alan, do you want Roman to grow up playing soccer?
Speaker 2 (27:20):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (27:22):
I'm actually going to go baseball. Why I love baseball?
I don't think. I don't think Roman likes soccer.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
What a silly comment.
Speaker 1 (27:31):
He likes, he likes. He picks up the ball eighteen
months old, he doesn't want to kick it.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
We'll see probably never kicked at eighteen months.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
Really, No, No, I want him to play whatever he wants, but.
Speaker 2 (27:45):
I want to play. I want him to play whatever
he wants as well, as long as it's got two
goals in their own ball, then they'll get Do.
Speaker 1 (27:53):
You ever get impostor syndrome?
Speaker 2 (27:55):
Good question? Possibly? Sometimes yeah, And I know this because
part of imposter syndrome is perfectionism. So would you procrastinate
because you want things to be perfect, which is part
of imposter syndrome. So yeah, I do get it in
(28:16):
that sense. I don't get it from a self doubt
point of view or a self confidence point of view.
I get it from a is this as good as
I can make it and it can be better, which
makes me takes me longer to do it, so I think.
(28:38):
But yeah, I think there's parts of it creep into
my keep, into my life. Yeah, yeah, absolutely certain examples
and I can't think of hand right now, but yeah,
it's definitely something that's doesn't have a huge impact in
my life, but it definitely creeps in at times. What
about you.
Speaker 1 (28:56):
A part of imposter syndrome is undermining success, and I
feel like I do that a lot, where you'll be like, yeah,
but you're about to do four movies. I'm like, oh, well,
it's not. When I say, I'll go like, well, it's
not this, or it's not that, or it's not it's
not the series that I want, or it's not so
I'll I undermine it a lot instead of being like, yeah,
four movies is awesome, that's so cool. I'm a working actress.
But I'd be like, well, because I think it's because
(29:18):
I do hear the other people in my brain going.
But it's just a D list and it's just done
this and it's not it's not a you know, a
big ABC show or something like that.
Speaker 2 (29:29):
We have this discussion during the week, Well, it's never
going to be perfect, Like it's never going to be
filmed in Nashville. It's never going to be the perfect
director or the perfect script or it's never going to
be the perfect It's never going to be perfect. So therefore, but.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
I just believe that it can be. We see, like
I have hope and belief that like, no, there is
going to be a perfect situation. En roll and you know.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
I'm talking about perfectis and filmed in Nashville, so you
don't have to be on location.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
But I'm okay being you know, like some of these
just film a couple. So it's like, I don't know,
I find it to be I do think there is
a situation like that.
Speaker 2 (30:20):
Yeah. Sometimes sometimes I feel like I don't deserve certain things,
which is also a part of imposta syndrome. So I'm like,
I think I don't deserve it, yeah, or I'm not
going to get it because I don't deserve it.
Speaker 1 (30:37):
You want buying things, Yeah, you're that way, like you
have a massive retail Uh what's that called retail guilt? Yeah,
where you'll buy something like I'm returning it. I don't.
I don't. I don't. I don't deserve it, I don't need it.
I'm like, what, it's a it's a it's a two
piece set from whatever that viewery Like, Babe, you wanted it,
(31:00):
you know, but you're just like.
Speaker 2 (31:01):
Ah know, Yeah. So I think it plays a little.
I think it plays a small part in our lives.
I don't think it over consumes or well, not me anyway.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
I don't think you what is something in your past
you would like to redo on.
Speaker 2 (31:15):
I mean there's obviously certain incidents that I would absolutely
love a redoo on, Like.
Speaker 1 (31:22):
What give me one might right, I'm pinned that one yet.
Speaker 2 (31:28):
But I think I would. I would think I would
like a redeo on my playing career. Oh really, yeah, yeah.
I think I would have played a different position on
the field, and I would have had a different type
of career. Maybe I wouldn't have the coaching business I
have right now, but I would have had a different career.
(31:48):
So if I could, if I could redo my career
playing career, I would play it in a different position.
That's quite a big one for me that I think
about a lot, and it's something that I wasn't exposed
to really late in my career, that change of possession.
And when I got there, I'm like, Wow, this feels
like where I should have been for the last fifteen years.
(32:09):
So I would always have liked to READO on that. Yeah, yeah,
what about you?
Speaker 1 (32:15):
I mean sure I would like a certain redo on
relationships and maybe not walk down a few miles and
or went to Vegas and of course, you know, stayed
in abusive relationships. But if we're gonna go career wise,
and it's interesting. I was talking to Sophia and Rob
about this on the Drama Queen's podcast about how you know,
I look back and sometimes cringe at episodes. I'm like, god,
(32:38):
I didn't, you know, I if I could only redo that,
But then again I didn't. I still wouldn't have had
like playing her playing my character twenty verse forty is
just wildly different anyways, because I know more now, So
it's yeah, so I think it's you just you know
(33:00):
more now. That's the thing even with your with with
playing a different position or sports or whatever, it's it's
the knowledge we have now or the emotional capabilities that
we have to connect to things are are wildly different,
which is why I think my acting is better now
that it was back then, because I've gone through more
things and connect can can connect. But so I don't
(33:22):
I don't know if that would have changed, but I
I would love to play that character again, would you? Oh? Yeah?
She was fun. It was really fun. And now that
I have a little more.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
What the one tree? Hell yeah, little menace.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
Little menace, Little menace. So I was watching something on
What Happens Live Paige Sorbo. She was dating Craig Bonover.
They are from Summer House. They have now broken up,
but she has said that she basically would lie for him, right, Okay,
(33:58):
So I'm just curious, you know, have you ever lied
to protect your partner?
Speaker 2 (34:04):
I've a lied to protect my partner and a loaded question.
I'm gonna get more context on it. So she was
she was she was lying to defend them, yes, right, Okay?
Would I lie to defend you? Yeah? I would.
Speaker 1 (34:26):
I feel like if you have to lie for your partner, though, that's.
Speaker 2 (34:29):
It could be a really tricky situation where give me one.
Speaker 1 (34:35):
I mean, like we had like a couple of months
ago in therapy or something. You're like, oh, I would.
I wasn't going to say that. I'm like, well, I am,
because I have to own up to my staff, you know.
So I think that's a situation where maybe you would
have I don't know if you would have lied, but
maybe you would have like defended. But I mean know
(34:56):
I called myself out to be like, no, that's that
I own this. This isami. You're like, oh, wasn't even
to say that.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
But if I would lie, if I knew it was
going to protect you from a situation didn't want to
be in, or a situation which was going to which
is going to affect us and our family, then yeah
I would. Yeah. Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (35:17):
I mean I'll always defend you. But I just feel
like if there's a lie in that, it sounds like
then that person did something actually wrong.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
Well, it depends on how much you're going to deviate
on your morals to protect something that needs to be
protected for the greater good. Like if I have to
lie to keep you out of a situation where you
which might be unsafe for you, then yeah, sure, granted, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
It seems more in the situation though, the defending maybe
character okay that makes sense and maybe not, but that's
just what I make up when I read the story.
That's like, but if you have to defend your partner,
like I have lied for my person in the past
one thousand percent, but I don't. I don't. I wouldn't
(36:05):
do it now like I would defend you. I would
defend you always, but like lie, that's the piece where
I wouldn't do that again, because if you're lying for
your partner, that's them being like.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
What was false? You're living a false life.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
Yeah, like no, he did do this and that is
like that, Yeah it was wrong.
Speaker 2 (36:27):
Okay, So in that sense, then I think the Falst
thing is wrong for me to put you in a
possession where you have to lie on mest and foremost,
So they are that's wrong. I think. Secondly, yeah, I
mean I don't think I've been I've not been a
situation where I had to lie for you or you've
(36:49):
had to life on me.
Speaker 1 (36:50):
Well, I guess if someone is in that situation, I'm curious.
I guess reflect on a boy. Is that something that
I just don't think that's a healthy defend always, Yeah,
have have your partner. You always want to defend your partner.
But if you are defending their something that they've done
(37:11):
wrong and you're lying about it, that is maybe possibly
feeding the problem too.
Speaker 2 (37:16):
You're becoming an enabler.
Speaker 1 (37:18):
Yeah, even though she did say, like behind doors, she'd
be like, you know that was wrong. So that's like
that was you know, good that she'd come back and
be like in private, she would say, you know that
you were wrong, but I'm going to defend you because
you're my boyfriend. Like I love like that piece of it.
Speaker 2 (37:30):
Yeah, So here's here's my take on it. Here's my
honest answer. I think everything is relative to the situation
and the importance of the situation. I think I would
be prepared to do it once. If it has to
happen again, then it's you're in the wrong scenario, yeah,
with the wrong person. Yeah, and you need to get out. Yeah,
(37:53):
so I think I would.
Speaker 1 (37:55):
I think it's about accountability too for the other person,
Like I don't want to always lie for you, like
and that was a you know, I've been there, so
it's like the person has to take accountability, which is
why relationships have changed. Now you know.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
Well.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
On that note, see you guys next week.
Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heeart Radio Podcast.
You've got your little blink, my blink, my slow blink
when I get tired. Yeah, I think it's salergies. I
think they're messing with me a little bit today in
the last couple of days, or it's because Roman was
not feeling one hundred percent, So I think maybe it
(00:23):
could be like a little piece of his bug or
something too. I was supposed to go out tonight with
some girls, but I don't think that's going to happen,
which is a bummer because actually it was like, oh,
I have a little girls night.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
It'd been fun, but we're supposed to go.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Uh when the neighbors were kind of talking about it,
and I'm like, yeah, that would actually be really fun.
I don't ever go out out. You know. They were
going to go to this cute little place in East Nashville.
But it's one of those where it's like even my
friend was like, they're gonna like one of our neighbors
is like super like she likes to like it's going
to be late and it's going to be you know, fun.
(00:59):
But I'm just like what I always leave or uber back,
But I already am like preparing my Hey, I'm not
feeling one hundred percent, which they probably all expect anyways,
I just you know, but this is because I just
think about how much it'll put me back for tomorrow
if I'm not feeling one hundred percent today, not having
a good night's sleep, Like I'm old. It's just what
(01:21):
it's coming down to. It's fine, everything is fine.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
You make the right choice.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
Yeah, no, I know. So Father's Day is coming up,
and it's one of those where it's so hard because
when you were like, I don't care, I'm like, I
know what I would want for Mother's Day, which is
I would like to have half and half. Well, I
mean this year was I was on a movie set,
(01:46):
so I couldn't really ask for for that because I
just wanted to be with the kids, and you guys,
since that was my only weekend seeing the kids for
those three weeks. In a way, well mine's the one
that I came home. But I digress. So I I
would like a half day at a spa and then
like come home to a dinner. Yeah, it's it's almost
(02:09):
because all the Mother's Day gifts are funny too. It's
they're like here you go. It's because we would actually
like a day oh I make up and from what
I've seen that we actually want to be away from
the kids on Mother's Day, like dads can go golfing
and do and then you know, so it's like you
guys have that on your Father's Day. That's where I
feel like a lot of dads do or they go
(02:30):
do like they want to go fish or like I
know Nick likes to go to the pond and stuff,
and so it's like we also don't want to be
it goes fresh and every week, right, it's a piece
of bad example, find what you mean? Yeah, So but
like for Mother's Day, that is like a dream Mother's
Day for me is a half and half where it's
like I go to a spa and maybe it's like
(02:51):
me and my girlfriends because we don't really get to
go together get together, and I think that's they'd be
nice if all of us moms went to like a spa,
that would be a dream and then come home to
a nice cook dinner from the husband, hang with the kids.
So that is like a dream Mother's Day that I've
never had.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
Like that, Oh you couldn't get this year because it
was in legs.
Speaker 1 (03:12):
And no the kids, Yeah, yeah, because I obviously want
to see them a part of it, but I also
would like to peace out too and be like pampered
mom mom day. So but with you, you know, the
last Father's Day we I think I was filming. Yes,
I was filming, So we went to dinner and stuff
(03:34):
and so yeah, that was on.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Troy was over.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Yeah that was so great. But this year he's you know,
he's not able to come over until you know, the
following week. So I'm curious and I asked you. I'm like,
what do you want to do? And you're like, does
motor Like we don't have to do anything? Like that's
not okay. I just told you my dream mother's day.
What would your dream Father's Day look like?
Speaker 2 (03:56):
My dream follow's day?
Speaker 1 (03:57):
I mean, obviously having your son over, but we know
that he can't is not the following week because I
have only a week or some and some change to
come up with something, and right now I got nothing,
literally nothing, And I actually mean this no, but you
know me, I know what you're about to say. That's
not a You're going to be like, we don't need
(04:19):
to do anything.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Well, we don't because we didn't do you know what,
I never get to just and never forget to just set.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
And you won't. That's the thing, you won't. You won't
just sit. Okay, Dream Father's Day go. But we have
to exclude the fact that we know that he can't
come till the following.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Okay, well, the fact that I know that he's coming
the following week has actually made my father's day. Don't
know he's coming there, I don't know how busy junas
from finishing one thing to then start another.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
So that's that's perfect. It's not perfect, but it's good.
Dream Father's Day would be having a lion.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Okay, okay, easy, okay, I get it right now. Notes
on that, yes, I do, because I have to not
be like guy sleep in. I would never I'm a lion.
Speaker 2 (05:15):
Wake up, wake up, and those.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
Coffee, coffee, eggs and turkey bacon.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
Yes, done, eggs and turkey bacon.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
Do I know my husband or do I know my husband?
The eggs, turkey bacon?
Speaker 2 (05:30):
Okay, okay, I think it would probably.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Ladies, listen up, I'm giving you a head head start
here with the men.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Want I'm not going to go and play like, I'll
think about something that I would like to do that
I don't normally prioritize I get to do like golf.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
Like golf, I need to make that reservation.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
No, you don't need to. So what I'm talking about
is I would I'd be happy just just going to
a driving range for an hour, smashing aut of one
hundred and fifty. Right, Okay, come back and have a
pool day with the kids, old day.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
What if it rains.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
If it rains, then.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
If it rains, fancy them all trip?
Speaker 2 (06:20):
Not really, No, I think. I think if it rains,
we're going to get lunch somewhere, a nice lunch somewhere, and.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Yeah, let's talk president. What would you like? Nothing I need, right,
and there's there's needs, and there's once or likes.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
I've already said to you it's.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
Something right, and you haven't sent me the link.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
I'm not sending you the link, so that that's fine.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
And anything else. Talking about soccer boots, so.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Yeah, up the football boots, their boots.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
That's right. I did say right.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Okay, you did say it right, Okay, so that would
be perfect. And then at the end, get the hyenas
to bed. Then I get to spend time with my
perfect wife. Can we watch a movie? Oh, we watch
more of that new series.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Of stuff that we'll finish it by then.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
Oh yeah, it's next week.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
Is yeah? Okay, Well that sounds like a fun father's day.
Then I love that. That'll be good. Anything else else
going on in your.
Speaker 2 (07:28):
Yes, it's been a busy week, A busy week. You
also new client, which is good. Yeah, big, big big.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
One, big big big one. We can't say because he
signed an NDA. That's how big.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Yeah, so he has agent called me and did some
work of the player and now we'll get discussion on
whether he comes into the comes into the program.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
It was one of those where I was like, We're
not being catfished, are we? I was like, how did
this agent reach out to you? Did he like d
M you?
Speaker 2 (08:01):
Did he like?
Speaker 1 (08:01):
Because I know you're like a big deal with striker
people and you do the analysis and but it's like
training the training programs, right, but it's you know, I'm
still like, I wonder because I mean, like I wrote you,
I wrote to your website thing will you marry me?
I also put my name to were Claire.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
So that was that was a good I mean, it
was hectic to get these analysis done in time for
a huge.
Speaker 1 (08:27):
For two days and you had we had we had
how many nights to get that done?
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Look at they and a half So two nights.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
Yeah, And it was like, hey, honey, I'm not going
to la And then you're like, well, I still need
to work until but I was it was great.
Speaker 2 (08:40):
That was good. So was the possible Saudi deal, which.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
We might be moving to Saudi Arabia, moving, but it's
a good part. Can you imagine if I called Mike
and was like, hey, can I move the kids to
Saudi Arabia? Listen. We had a hard enough time asking
about Chicago, so I think Saudi Arabia would have been
out of the question.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
So that's good. There's been a few zooms and calls
on that joint venture over there.
Speaker 1 (09:06):
Things are wheling and dealing.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
Things are wieling and dealing. And I've got a speeding
ticket this morning.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
He did get a speeding ticket. And I had to
remind you he's just doing his job and you were
in the wrong speeding when I.
Speaker 2 (09:22):
Take a beat, Yeah, I'm in the wrong. But this
guy appeared from nowhere.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
I was like, well, yeah, they're cops. They hide in
you know, places to catch people in this get people
on speeding because they're doing their job.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Yeah, everyone on that road is speeding, right.
Speaker 1 (09:41):
Well, I did say that. I was like, that guy
is for sure not going fifteen.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
I was trying to like the unlucky one.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
Yeah, and he's like, oh, trust me, I've already stopped
five people in the last thirty minutes. I'm like, this
is a tricky road and it just started construction, and
we were like, where's the twenty five mile per hour sign?
Speaker 2 (09:56):
I actually don't see any.
Speaker 1 (09:57):
There's actually a bunch. Yeah, there will be because he's
now that you'll now you'll see them.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
But listen, I'm in the wrong. I was gone over
the speed limit slightly, slightly. Oh it's normally a forty.
That road is normally a forty.
Speaker 1 (10:11):
It's actually not thirty five.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
Okay, So I was in nine miles an hour over
the limit twenty five. Yeah, but you said because of
the construction that's come down, which I never took notice
off anyway. So been a good week which ended in
the bloody speeding ticket.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
Time to go to driving school?
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Yeah, online, it's online. I don't need to go there
physical physically goal you.
Speaker 1 (10:38):
Got to go to court.
Speaker 2 (10:39):
The PTSD horrible, Yeah, yeah, okay, what were you a week?
Speaker 1 (10:47):
Yeah, you know, trains, planes and automobiles didn't didn't get
to where I need to be, so it's time. Oh good.
It was a reroute. I love. I love a good reroute.
That's the thing. I'm a big believer that, you know,
there was a reason why we were delayed, was the
reason why we didn't go, And it's okay. I always
think there's a greater plan within, you know, God's inner
(11:12):
workings of all that. Like maybe we would have gotten
into an accident. I don't know. There was just like
so many things where I I take those signs and
say that's where I wasn't. I wasn't meant to go
do that, so and that said where I kind of
always live within things. But yeah, I found you know,
I found it to be a good week.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
Movie.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
Yep, booked to movie. So excited about that and so well,
you know, because I always talk about on wine down too,
so it's like not trying to repeat you know what
I mean.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Yeah, fun questions.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
Did sexual chemistry or emotional chemistry come first in your relationship?
For you both.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
That's a good question because the sexual chemistry or emotional
care mystry comp That's a strange one because we spent
a lot of time talking on zoom before we actually met.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
FaceTime zoom face. We weren't having business.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
Sending your email was with a link here's the past one.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
When you're meeting my day.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
On zoom this morning, sorry, FaceTime.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
There is a difference, which is why I had to clarify.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
I appreciate that. I think, yeah, there was definitely sexual
sexual chemistry and emotional chemistry. I think there was that
even before we met, and then when we met, there
was it was definitely that.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
Yeah, yeah, I would say there was a definite chemistry
when we were facetiming, but it went beyond like a
sexual chemistry, because if I'm going to be honest, I
really didn't get the I was attracted to your FaceTime,
but it was it was a person in person. There
was I'm like, okay, I am attracted to this person.
It takes me a second. Then it was like an
(13:00):
instant in person, if that makes sense. Did you have
any hesitations moving so fast in your relationship?
Speaker 2 (13:18):
None?
Speaker 1 (13:19):
Well that was fast response.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
No, I know because I talked about it with someone
a couple of days ago.
Speaker 1 (13:25):
A couple of days ago yesterday, Who would you talk
to yesterday about it?
Speaker 2 (13:31):
Tell me?
Speaker 1 (13:34):
I mean, I know who if I looked at the
calendar exactly, what was it? What brought up about? That
came up about that we're talking to a mentor essentially, because.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
We're talking about the timeline of things of Roman before marriage,
and the question came up of how did I feel
about things being in that order and how quickly things
moved and straight out like zero concerns over it, zero doubts,
would never change any of it. So that's why I
(14:09):
answered that question so quickly on did we have any
hesitations on moving so fast? I had none because I
was I was sure, I knew things were We're.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Right, Yeah, I mean I think there was. I'll speak
to an episode that we posted last week. It was
on when we get into conflict, how you know you
try to push my buttons? And then someone had commented
in the wind down DMS, which I love people when
(14:43):
they love people's comments, whether good or bad. I always
kind of look at them both ways.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
And.
Speaker 1 (14:50):
They were basically like why, like maybe like you posting
this actually shows your really I can't remember exactly what
they said, but like, this isn't actually good that your
post this about it. And I kind of I looked
at that and goes, okay, we always said that we
wouldn't show weakness for our marriage, and I kind of
(15:11):
brought that up, was like, did we overshare on the
last episode talking about you know, how how we have
conflict and how sometimes you know, there is a budding
of like you want to like you have words that
come out that you don't want to say, you know,
and so, and I was like, did that did that
(15:32):
bring weakness out? Or does that show weakness in our relationship?
Speaker 2 (15:35):
That was a question.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
That's what I asked you in the car. I'm like,
because we always talked about not because they're like, oh,
if they're sharing this, imagine what's behind closed doors?
Speaker 2 (15:43):
Is that what the person said.
Speaker 1 (15:44):
In a way, yeah, I can't. I don't verbate them, remember,
because I I didn't really, you know, have much thought
into that. But when I was thinking about that, I'm like,
to me and what and I do remember responding in
a way, it's like, there is no perfect relationship, Like
you guys, I'm like, show me a couple that has
(16:06):
zero issues. Yeah, that has never fought, that has never
had a you know, a confrontation from maybe communication, or
that has said something they regretted saying, or like, show
me one relationship that's And to me, I'm like, I
find it healthy that there is conflict and that there
is not all the time, like it doesn't need to
(16:27):
be a constant where it's like it doesn't have to
be hard all the time, and that's not what it is.
And I also think there's what I said to them.
I was like, there's no perfect relationship and there's so
much growth in the work that we do and this
is like light years less than like what I had
in my previous you know.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Yeah, So you're going back to your question to me,
does it show too much weakness?
Speaker 1 (16:51):
No, I don't think it does. But I'm just saying, like.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
You know, I don't think so. I think it shows
an honesty. And I think the fact that there's no
relationship out there that doesn't have issues none. There's people's
perception of what issues might be, and there's people's perception
of what our lives might be based on what we
say on this podcast. But that's the that's their opinion,
(17:18):
and that's their perceptions only perception, because they're now thinking, oh,
if that's what they're sharing, then what's all the craziest
that's happening that they're not sharing when it's actually not
the case. We're actually sharing stuff that helps other people,
are being honest that these are these are the only
issues that we have. There's not underlying issues that creep
(17:38):
through the But it just shows you people's perception. Like
I got a shitty email from someone during the week
that's shared with you, which one someone had written to
me And I don't know if I could share this
on here, but someone had written to me on an email.
How can you go from I think I can share that,
yeah for sure. How can you go from England coach
(18:01):
to a household a house husband coaching kids? You must
have some bad karma. But that's that's somebody's perception because
I'm no longer with England, though they don't have a
clue what I'm doing in the background and what's going
on in the background and the clients I have and
the deals that I'm doing and other things that are
(18:21):
so it's just people's perception of our lives are actually
probably a lot different from what they actually think.
Speaker 1 (18:31):
Yeah, and I think too. You know a lot of
times people will be like, oh, he doesn't have a job,
like does Alan work like that? Those are a lot
of my questions that come in when I do my
Wednesday what do you want to know? Questions?
Speaker 2 (18:41):
Yeah, and it's like maybe I should, maybe I should
clarify to people what I actually do, and they'd be like, oh, wow, right.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
Okay, Well because your whole like when I met you,
you were coaching in Norwich, and because you haven't landed
a coaching like you you could have like that's the
thing that you could be an assistant coach in San Diego.
You could be doing set piece coaching here. And it's
like you have reworked what you want to do because
you've seen a benefit in other areas. And there will
(19:11):
be a time where you will if you want to
take that position again, right when the time is right,
you know, for you for everything, and so but people
don't it's like because you haven't late, it's not it's
like and do you have to like? But it's people's
perception is what's so funny. And then I had even
a comment yesterday I didn't even tell you this because
I wasn't feeling good yesterday. But and this has happened before.
(19:33):
I don't look at any of those hate pages and
people have I won't even give the name to it
because it's when they had when they had spoke. The
last time I looked on that hate page was when
they were saying that we lied about when Roman was born.
And then I'm like that and that's where I was
(19:55):
just like, and you know that we're still lying that,
you know, and someone said when I we were celebrating
Roman's year wedding, I'm sorry your birthday, They're like, well,
that's not actually the date per this page, and I'm
like in and I was like, in what world? Why?
Like why would I? And that's when I knew back then,
like I was like, they're like they're just reaching and
(20:16):
they're just trying to just you know, have their own
stories that they make up and inner workings of it all.
And so you know, they do that same thing about
your job, which is what filters in. And then they
also yesterday when I was saying how different this relationship
is and how I can trust you versus my past
relationships is you know, your words and actions they match
(20:37):
and and where you know, someone commented and said, oh,
but this page says that he's on dating apps, and
I ended up. Yeah. And now in the past, I
would have been like, show me the proof, like because
obviously that has was a trend, right, so like yeah,
(20:59):
but with this, I'm like, I laughed out loud, you know,
because they want to create issues in their own what
are those those? She and this girl's like, Unfortunately it's
like my trashy magazines. And I just said, question for
you though, if this was your life and we you know,
(21:20):
flipped this and people were writing this about you, very
untrue things, you know, how would that make you feel?
Because no matter, like it doesn't affect because I don't
look at it anymore. But of course I'm still human.
It still hurts. But no matter what I do, no
matter what you do, no matter if you have this
top client that it ends up you know, really doing
your program, They're still going to say he's a house
(21:41):
husband because that's the narrative that makes them feel better.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
Yeah. People will create their narrative based off their own
agenda and then negas have seen their own life.
Speaker 1 (21:51):
Like nothing I can do or you can do good
or bad. Are they're going to say, like, Okay, now
I like them, Like no, they they hate me, and
now they will be mean to you. And so I
I just to that point about moving fast, I mean,
you know, going into that, I mean there's things that
come up with other people's perceptions as opposed to ours.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
Yeah, and there's also the how you're supposed to do things,
traditional things how you and it's there's no see, as
long as you follow the boundaries and the core values
of your relationship, there's no there's no right or wrong
timing on things. That's absolutely not.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
I think you need to cover the basis of what's
important to you and if you people align. But I
don't see the point like when you know, like we
knew we wanted to try, there's to then be like,
all right, well let's date for two years and then
let's try. It's like that there're a there wasn't time
for that.
Speaker 2 (22:53):
But then also personally we wanted.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
I knew that you were my person when I met you,
and at that point I didn't care what anyone thought.
So and that's what I said to that person. I
was like, well, if he is good on him, ope,
his site's good and he'd be an idiot, but it's
all good. I know, so funny. But to speak on
(23:16):
that again, those just to just wrap that piece up
about it is you know, I think there is because
obviously I post the like finding love. There is that,
and I was just talking to someone else on another
podcasts and we were saying, like there, but there's also
things and issues and you have to work on communication,
and we're working on that, and I think that's that'll
(23:37):
only make our marriage stronger as opposed to not and
then having it faster for seven years and then we're
so disconnected. It's like I don't want that.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Yes, we are strengthening. People might see it as weakness,
and regardless, I don't really care. But we are making
sure that a foundations as strong as possible so that
we are for the next thirty forty fifty years. So
that's why we're doing the work right now rather than
being reactive. Yeah in ten years time and our foundation
(24:10):
is not as strong to go back on and actually
to be to be rigid on the co values and beliefs.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
But if you did have a dating app, like what
would the oh my god, if you do well played
it's actually upsurd, like well are you on hingebabe Riah?
Which one is the bumble?
Speaker 2 (24:33):
Yeah? All of them. If but for people to make that,
like the email that I got that, why do that?
Speaker 1 (24:40):
Because they like, why be.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
Nasty like that and have a perception of someone you
don't have a clue what they do just because you
don't see it. It would be good for people to
spend a week with us and then they'll be like,
all right, okay.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Yeah, Alan works. I mean I don't see you. You
were in your office, so you come out of the
office at four, but you have your clients. The analysis
I mean that is you do so much work. You're
not sitting playing video games and not working and not
like you work and hustle and your private training people
(25:18):
all the things and so so what it might be
some youth players okay, and you're growing something for you know,
but people you're not like I'm just gonna say, I'm
gonna call myself out. You're not like me. You don't
post things and be like this is what I'm doing today,
Like sometimes you do, like when you're Brian White scores,
He's the top scorer in the MLS and Hugo. They're
fighting your other client, who's the top scorer in the MLS.
(25:39):
You don't gloat like being like I'm now doing analysis.
I'm now doing you know, like I'm now training this
really huge player in Nashville. I'm you know, who's on
an MLS team? Like, you don't do that.
Speaker 2 (25:52):
Two PM, I have a deal with the Saudi conglomerate
to discuss a joint ventur licensing. I just don't do it.
That's not how I operate.
Speaker 1 (25:59):
Yeah, so people.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
Don't have a clue. But yeah, it would be good
for people to spend a week with us and be like, wow.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
Maybe we should do a day in the life real
for Alan on your page. There you go. Maybe people
need't see that my stay at home husband would you
would never be And some people are okay with that
and that's not your listen.
Speaker 2 (26:22):
For some men it's fine and that's and they're okay
with it. I just it's not how I could ever operate.
Speaker 1 (26:28):
Yeah, and I wouldn't want that for you either. Do
you guys align on music taste?
Speaker 2 (26:46):
Oh wow? No, no, no, I put up with yours
and you hate mine. I listen to house music and
you don't.
Speaker 1 (26:55):
Like it and you listen to I listened to Chill
Hits on Spotify. That's my jam, Chill Hits. It's a
really good playlist. I love it. It's chill. You listen
to music that gives me anxiety and panic attacks because
it's like pound pound pound pound pound, it's like house music.
I'm not a house music fan.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
Done. Yeah, okay, So.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Alan, do you want Roman to grow up playing soccer?
Speaker 2 (27:20):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (27:22):
I'm actually going to go baseball. Why I love baseball?
I don't think. I don't think Roman likes soccer.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
What a silly comment.
Speaker 1 (27:31):
He likes, he likes. He picks up the ball eighteen
months old, he doesn't want to kick it.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
We'll see probably never kicked at eighteen months.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
Really, No, No, I want him to play whatever he wants, but.
Speaker 2 (27:45):
I want to play. I want him to play whatever
he wants as well, as long as it's got two
goals in their own ball, then they'll get Do.
Speaker 1 (27:53):
You ever get impostor syndrome?
Speaker 2 (27:55):
Good question? Possibly? Sometimes yeah, And I know this because
part of imposter syndrome is perfectionism. So would you procrastinate
because you want things to be perfect, which is part
of imposter syndrome. So yeah, I do get it in
(28:16):
that sense. I don't get it from a self doubt
point of view or a self confidence point of view.
I get it from a is this as good as
I can make it and it can be better, which
makes me takes me longer to do it, so I think.
(28:38):
But yeah, I think there's parts of it creep into
my keep, into my life. Yeah, yeah, absolutely certain examples
and I can't think of hand right now, but yeah,
it's definitely something that's doesn't have a huge impact in
my life, but it definitely creeps in at times. What
about you.
Speaker 1 (28:56):
A part of imposter syndrome is undermining success, and I
feel like I do that a lot, where you'll be like, yeah,
but you're about to do four movies. I'm like, oh, well,
it's not. When I say, I'll go like, well, it's
not this, or it's not that, or it's not it's
not the series that I want, or it's not so
I'll I undermine it a lot instead of being like, yeah,
four movies is awesome, that's so cool. I'm a working actress.
But I'd be like, well, because I think it's because
(29:18):
I do hear the other people in my brain going.
But it's just a D list and it's just done
this and it's not it's not a you know, a
big ABC show or something like that.
Speaker 2 (29:29):
We have this discussion during the week, Well, it's never
going to be perfect, Like it's never going to be
filmed in Nashville. It's never going to be the perfect
director or the perfect script or it's never going to
be the perfect It's never going to be perfect. So therefore, but.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
I just believe that it can be. We see, like
I have hope and belief that like, no, there is
going to be a perfect situation. En roll and you know.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
I'm talking about perfectis and filmed in Nashville, so you
don't have to be on location.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
But I'm okay being you know, like some of these
just film a couple. So it's like, I don't know,
I find it to be I do think there is
a situation like that.
Speaker 2 (30:20):
Yeah. Sometimes sometimes I feel like I don't deserve certain things,
which is also a part of imposta syndrome. So I'm like,
I think I don't deserve it, yeah, or I'm not
going to get it because I don't deserve it.
Speaker 1 (30:37):
You want buying things, Yeah, you're that way, like you
have a massive retail Uh what's that called retail guilt? Yeah,
where you'll buy something like I'm returning it. I don't.
I don't. I don't. I don't deserve it, I don't need it.
I'm like, what, it's a it's a it's a two
piece set from whatever that viewery Like, Babe, you wanted it,
(31:00):
you know, but you're just like.
Speaker 2 (31:01):
Ah know, Yeah. So I think it plays a little.
I think it plays a small part in our lives.
I don't think it over consumes or well, not me anyway.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
I don't think you what is something in your past
you would like to redo on.
Speaker 2 (31:15):
I mean there's obviously certain incidents that I would absolutely
love a redoo on, Like.
Speaker 1 (31:22):
What give me one might right, I'm pinned that one yet.
Speaker 2 (31:28):
But I think I would. I would think I would
like a redeo on my playing career. Oh really, yeah, yeah.
I think I would have played a different position on
the field, and I would have had a different type
of career. Maybe I wouldn't have the coaching business I
have right now, but I would have had a different career.
(31:48):
So if I could, if I could redo my career
playing career, I would play it in a different position.
That's quite a big one for me that I think
about a lot, and it's something that I wasn't exposed
to really late in my career, that change of possession.
And when I got there, I'm like, Wow, this feels
like where I should have been for the last fifteen years.
(32:09):
So I would always have liked to READO on that. Yeah, yeah,
what about you?
Speaker 1 (32:15):
I mean sure I would like a certain redo on
relationships and maybe not walk down a few miles and
or went to Vegas and of course, you know, stayed
in abusive relationships. But if we're gonna go career wise,
and it's interesting. I was talking to Sophia and Rob
about this on the Drama Queen's podcast about how you know,
I look back and sometimes cringe at episodes. I'm like, god,
(32:38):
I didn't, you know, I if I could only redo that,
But then again I didn't. I still wouldn't have had
like playing her playing my character twenty verse forty is
just wildly different anyways, because I know more now, So
it's yeah, so I think it's you just you know
(33:00):
more now. That's the thing even with your with with
playing a different position or sports or whatever, it's it's
the knowledge we have now or the emotional capabilities that
we have to connect to things are are wildly different,
which is why I think my acting is better now
that it was back then, because I've gone through more
things and connect can can connect. But so I don't
(33:22):
I don't know if that would have changed, but I
I would love to play that character again, would you? Oh? Yeah?
She was fun. It was really fun. And now that
I have a little more.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
What the one tree? Hell yeah, little menace.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
Little menace, Little menace. So I was watching something on
What Happens Live Paige Sorbo. She was dating Craig Bonover.
They are from Summer House. They have now broken up,
but she has said that she basically would lie for him, right, Okay,
(33:58):
So I'm just curious, you know, have you ever lied
to protect your partner?
Speaker 2 (34:04):
I've a lied to protect my partner and a loaded question.
I'm gonna get more context on it. So she was
she was she was lying to defend them, yes, right, Okay?
Would I lie to defend you? Yeah? I would.
Speaker 1 (34:26):
I feel like if you have to lie for your partner, though, that's.
Speaker 2 (34:29):
It could be a really tricky situation where give me one.
Speaker 1 (34:35):
I mean, like we had like a couple of months
ago in therapy or something. You're like, oh, I would.
I wasn't going to say that. I'm like, well, I am,
because I have to own up to my staff, you know.
So I think that's a situation where maybe you would
have I don't know if you would have lied, but
maybe you would have like defended. But I mean know
(34:56):
I called myself out to be like, no, that's that
I own this. This isami. You're like, oh, wasn't even
to say that.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
But if I would lie, if I knew it was
going to protect you from a situation didn't want to
be in, or a situation which was going to which
is going to affect us and our family, then yeah
I would. Yeah. Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (35:17):
I mean I'll always defend you. But I just feel
like if there's a lie in that, it sounds like
then that person did something actually wrong.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
Well, it depends on how much you're going to deviate
on your morals to protect something that needs to be
protected for the greater good. Like if I have to
lie to keep you out of a situation where you
which might be unsafe for you, then yeah, sure, granted, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
It seems more in the situation though, the defending maybe
character okay that makes sense and maybe not, but that's
just what I make up when I read the story.
That's like, but if you have to defend your partner,
like I have lied for my person in the past
one thousand percent, but I don't. I don't. I wouldn't
(36:05):
do it now like I would defend you. I would
defend you always, but like lie, that's the piece where
I wouldn't do that again, because if you're lying for
your partner, that's them being like.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
What was false? You're living a false life.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
Yeah, like no, he did do this and that is
like that, Yeah it was wrong.
Speaker 2 (36:27):
Okay, So in that sense, then I think the Falst
thing is wrong for me to put you in a
possession where you have to lie on mest and foremost,
So they are that's wrong. I think. Secondly, yeah, I
mean I don't think I've been I've not been a
situation where I had to lie for you or you've
(36:49):
had to life on me.
Speaker 1 (36:50):
Well, I guess if someone is in that situation, I'm curious.
I guess reflect on a boy. Is that something that
I just don't think that's a healthy defend always, Yeah,
have have your partner. You always want to defend your partner.
But if you are defending their something that they've done
(37:11):
wrong and you're lying about it, that is maybe possibly
feeding the problem too.
Speaker 2 (37:16):
You're becoming an enabler.
Speaker 1 (37:18):
Yeah, even though she did say, like behind doors, she'd
be like, you know that was wrong. So that's like
that was you know, good that she'd come back and
be like in private, she would say, you know that
you were wrong, but I'm going to defend you because
you're my boyfriend. Like I love like that piece of it.
Speaker 2 (37:30):
Yeah, So here's here's my take on it. Here's my
honest answer. I think everything is relative to the situation
and the importance of the situation. I think I would
be prepared to do it once. If it has to
happen again, then it's you're in the wrong scenario, yeah,
with the wrong person. Yeah, and you need to get out. Yeah,
(37:53):
so I think I would.
Speaker 1 (37:55):
I think it's about accountability too for the other person,
Like I don't want to always lie for you, like
and that was a you know, I've been there, so
it's like the person has to take accountability, which is
why relationships have changed. Now you know.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
Well.
Speaker 1 (38:09):
On that note, see you guys next week.
Host
Jana Kramer
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