June 13, 2025 • 20 mins
In this laugh-out-loud, insight-packed episode of The Bama Brown Experience, Bama and the Big Puma dive headfirst into the myths that single men believe about what women want—and they’re not holding back. From the fear of being too bald or not buff enough, to the anxiety over driving a beat-up Chevy instead of a Ferrari, this episode unpacks it all with humor, heart, and a healthy dose of real talk.
Key Highlights:
Whether you’re single, dating, or just trying to figure out what the heck women are thinking, this episode is a must-listen. It’s brutally honest, wildly funny, and surprisingly insightful. Don’t forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with your friends—especially the ones still worried about their hairline.
Catch new episodes of The Bama Brown Experience every week on the iHeart Podcast Network.
Key Highlights:
- The top myths single men believe about women—and why they’re often dead wrong.
- Why being passionate about your hobby (yes, even Legos or model trains) might actually be a turn-on.
- The truth about “cool jobs,” money, and whether women really care about your car or your muscles.
- A hilarious breakdown of the “alpha male” myth and why kindness trumps cockiness every time.
- Bama’s personal stories about raising a daughter through law school, and the sacrifices that came with it.
- A side-splitting joke about vocal cords and... well, you’ll just have to hear it to believe it.
Whether you’re single, dating, or just trying to figure out what the heck women are thinking, this episode is a must-listen. It’s brutally honest, wildly funny, and surprisingly insightful. Don’t forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with your friends—especially the ones still worried about their hairline.
Catch new episodes of The Bama Brown Experience every week on the iHeart Podcast Network.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Hey, you're listening to the Mamma Brown Experience the iHeart
Podcast Network, three hundred thousand podcasts, and you chose this one.
What's wrong with you? I don't know. I appreciate thousands
of people who are listening a lot of us because
of Puma, the Big Cat. The Big Puma has a
Sports Cave and he produces this show and co host
(00:23):
with me, and I always appreciate that. Thank you very
much for be no show without Puma.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Promise you I'll always fun riding along with you. Almost
through another week here. But yeah, if you need a
little sports fix this weekend, go back and catch up
on this week's episodes of The Sports Cave with Biggest Puma.
Anywhere you get your podcasts, just search for that in
the search bar and get caught up. Got live Monday
(00:47):
and Wednesday on YouTube. But the audio episodes are always
there for you. Get you through a weekend.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Number one sports podcast and our whole deal. I mean,
it's everybody loves the Puma, the Big Cat as we
like to call him from from the Old School movie.
That's where the Big Cat came from. This is he
loves when I do these boneheads. What we'll call the boneheads,
the criminals that are stupid that may and I could
do one every ten minutes. I mean, there's so many
(01:13):
hard to pick. But yeah, So Richard Perua something like that.
He's in Lion County, Kentucky. Richard got d UI, got
pulled over and he's drunk and then they put him
in a cop car and they impounded his personal vehicle.
Now he was arrested, boasts bail. He gets out, he
(01:33):
goes to the impound yard, cuts a hole in the
fence because he wants his cocaine out of the trunk
this impounded car. Didn't try to take the car like
in the movies. He was trying to just get his coke.
And guess what, they monitor that. They know you're going
to try that, so they've got cameras and everything ready
for when you do that. And sure enough caught second time.
(01:54):
So now he's for sure going away for a while.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Let's add some additional charges of that original bad decision, shallow.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
That weren't smart. That wasn't a smart move on your part.
All right, So I thought just today we would hit
something here I thought was pretty interesting. Short and sweet.
They interviewed a huge amount of single women, and they
wanted to know what was the myths. All the myths,
the top ten myths will even say that women believe
(02:26):
or that single guys believe that women are thinking. You know,
And so I'm going to start at number I'm gonna
do nine because ten I didn't think was that interesting.
Nine was they they like it? Well, i'll tell you ten.
They hate DJs.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
Now this list is trash DJ's.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
I think they're the hot ship. That's that's the ones
they're gonna like. All right, So number nine was they
actually do like a guy that is that is passionate
about his hobby. Now, if you're doing whatever your hobby is,
model trains, it could be you know, legos, whatever it is.
You're worried that she's going to find out that you
(03:06):
do this crap. It's not that she likes that you're passionate.
It doesn't matter what it's about with single women, according
to them. Now, they surveyed something like a thousand, so
don't know, it should be fairly accurate all of these. So,
but uh, if you're single, Uh, this is this is guys,
This isn't women. These are these are guys what they
(03:27):
think women think and that's why they're they don't ever
ask women out. There's you know, when you meet a
group of women, say down, they go. Nobody ever asked
me out. It's hard to meet guys. And here's why,
because they have these preconceptions they're gonna get shot down.
And no guy wants to get shot down. He just
his ego is so large. Hit and that's everybody. They
just couldn't take it, you know, and it and it's
(03:49):
tough to do. Now, that was it? Hobbies? What what
was your hobby? Uh? You have your mustang, your car,
guy like me.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
So I think the you know, when and when the
roommate and I first started dating, my hobby was still
I mean I was still playing a lot of uh
you know, like intermural sports, are still playing in men's
leagues and still trying to play. I think, you know,
obviously the obvious hobby is if I'm home, sitting on
(04:20):
the couch, I'm watching sports. There's something, there's something that
was the biggest hobby that took some took some adjustment time.
And I do I absolutely believe that women love to
see you passionate about a hobby. But I also think
there's probably a hierarchy to certain hobbies with certain women,
you know, like for me, sports being a hobby that
(04:43):
was more attractive to my wife than if I was
into like magic the gathering or dune dragons. You know,
Like the video games are kind of on the line
to begin with.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Yeah, that and that's I think a lot of guys,
older guys, The video games are fine as long as that.
And I say this about cars, boats, hunting, golf. If
you're living, if you've got her living, or you're living
in a single wide with the side missing out of it,
and then you've got a forty thousand dollars boat out there. Priorities,
(05:13):
priorities not you know, don't let it, don't let it
overtake you, you know, and so make sure that you
have a nice place. In other words, separate it. Let's
put it that way. I think that's the word. Separation
of your hobby. So you could be passionate, but you
don't look like an idiot. Number eight was a cool job.
(05:34):
Many many guys were worried that they didn't have a
cool enough job for the women. And to the women
it didn't matter. They as long as you are on
a bum, as long as you aren't ten jobs in
the time they date. Yet you know, as a lot
of that you know and then moving around. That makes sense.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
But as someone who has benefited multiple times from having
a cool, a fairly cool job.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
Yes, her job's cool, cool, access like.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
It, I can see it. Just don't be a bomb
like you said, right, something steady, consistent and you'll be fine.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
And if you don't have enough money, there are plenty
of second jobs you can do. I had to do
two jobs my whole life so that my daughter could
become a lawyer and go to Baylor Law which, let
me tell you, oh, there was some do without while
she was there for two and a half years because
and I had to sell everything I had to pay
for it. But my daughter doesn't have a half million
(06:31):
dollars with student loans now. She went to Old Miss
for her undergrad and I love Old Miss because their
motto was, hell, we'll take you. There wasn't a big qualified.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
Wait, you want to move to Mississippi Goodness, that was
a yeah, we'll pay for the travel trailer, come on.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
She literally, she literally loved that school, loved her life there,
and she wouldn't take four it. She loved Old miss
she was at Baylor Law though there was no school.
It was just going to law school. There wasn't any
like going out going to Pepper Olly her as shit,
She's like, dude, if you're going to do something like that,
and at that point, you know when you're doing, you're
what you're going to be a school you need to study,
(07:12):
and boy she did. I was very proud. She's a
very successful divorce attorney now. And she's already told me
she'll handle my mom or my wife and my mom
say my wife is my mom, and she'll tell you
that that's part of the reason that would end up
like that, all right. Number seven, Uh was, uh, if
you were rich, it guy just kind of goes back
(07:32):
to the job thing. But guys are worried or not rich,
and women are only interested in the guy that's just
totally loaded. So she's most women almost one hundred percent
on that one. Women said absolutely not. They're more interested
in someone who's kind than they are someone who's rich
and a prick. You as someone who's kind and and uh,
(07:54):
you know, I want to I'll use an example to me.
The perfect guy like that would be Carter on Er.
Remember Carter He was. He was a multi multi maybe
a billionaire air but he was still a great guy,
a nice guy, you know. So my wife loves him
and loved the e R. But she loves the new
show he's on. He's on another show where he plays
an e R doctor. I mean it's the Rain. Yeah
(08:16):
the Pit, Yeah, yeah, the pit, And so watch that
if you're a Carter. Carter fan. I watched a movie
with him and uh uh, I can't remember who the
girl was. I think it was j Lo, one of them. Anyway, Uh,
he was a stalker. He was a bad guy. I
didn't know he played a bad guy this, you know,
a long time ago. But uh, it wasn't Jaylo with
(08:38):
somebody else. J Loo had another stalker movie and I thought, ship,
jay Loo, we're all stalking you. Come on, I mean,
give me a.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
Break, make a movie about this every time.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Yeah. And I'm sure if you went up to Ja
Loo and said hey baby, you know, and by the
time you were even close, there's some guy got you
in a choke hold, I'm sure. But but Ben affleck
that movie a hint. I mean that picture of him
the foot at the basketball game and the look on
his face and jay lo and ever fighting in the
look on his face, there's no matter no matter how
(09:09):
pretty she is, somebody somewhere sick of her shit.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Why remember absolutely.
Speaker 1 (09:19):
The look on his face. And he sees Jennifer Garner.
I gave him Jennifer Garner and I got jay lo
Ah out.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
But then he goes back to Jennifer Garner and then
we get the picture of him smoking the cigarette outside
the house again just like, Oh, man, I just can't win.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
I can't, I can't take it. He just, oh, it's
just you. I don't feel sorry for him because he's
been with jay lo and Jennifer Garner. But still, okay,
so that's rich, that's covers. They say, as long as
you're kind and money won't hurt. But you know, you
don't have to be luded. But you don't. As a father,
you do. You've come around mid all. You better have
(09:58):
some cash enough take care of dad anyway. Playing hard
to get was number six. Do not play hard to get?
Women hate that, you think they they you know, they
go for the bad boy. They didn't always go for
the bad boy. You're you're uh, what was it? Uh?
Speaker 2 (10:16):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (10:16):
I can't tell that one on there Okay, I got it.
I kind of can was lady bought a Uh, I
don't know how to I'm gonna use the word of cessorize.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Okay, okay, all right.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
Cess arise and you can fill in the blank. So
if lady wanted to get get her she wanted to
get her niece a doll, so she went to the store,
the toy store, and she said, I want to get
a Barbie doll for my niece. And she goes, okay,
and she buys the Barbie doll and she said, you know, oh,
(10:54):
I just thought, uh does does uh? Does she come
with Ken? And the salesperson said no, Uh, she accessorizes
with g I Joe. She she dates can't. Yeah, I
(11:18):
don't think it's censorized fiction. I don't know. See we're
not covered by us. He says, how much is ship
I can get away with?
Speaker 2 (11:26):
That was what I wish people could see the wheels
turning in your head as you're trying to figure out
how to have like.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
We get fired or not. Let me let me clear
some of everybody. I'm no longer on the radio on
kVA anymore. I don't do it on everybody do this podcast,
but still with iHeart. And they do have some you know,
they got some standards. They don't want us to mess up,
but uh, I don't. I really don't care, you know,
as far as getting in trouble or anything. I mean,
(11:54):
they won't fire me. They can't any time and they
know that. And we've had that discussion anyway. Okay, that
was playing hard to get, all right? The alpha dog.
They do not like an alpha dog. They think, you know,
when you think, oh I'm the guy, I'm running the show.
They said they're tired of that. Now this is once again,
this is a women. If you just joined us as women,
(12:15):
who I guess it's not like radio where they just
join us. They've been here for the whole deal. So, uh,
this is women. What guys believe in the myth that
they think women think the alpha male is a deal.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
And I think these last couple of you know, the
playing hard to get or the alpha male, I think
it's just don't be one hundred percent that because there
needs to be some still balance, Like you can't just be.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
A confidence is attractive, but over confidence or being a
dick that's not attractive.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
An alpha asshole, and don't be a beta cook like
find out a balance between the two of those.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
And to other people, they really judge how you, you know,
early on in the relationship, how you treat other people.
And I have found that it just doesn't matter losing
your shit over anything. It just maybe because I'm sixty seven,
but I just don't really get all worked up anymore.
I mean, sometimes my blood sugar will jump. You know,
it's an old guy thing with diabetes. But and that'll
(13:16):
make me, you know, stupid, mean, but you man, live.
The thing is about I had a boss one time,
and time it's the best advice I can give you. Besides, ladies,
take care of business at home. You won't have to
worry about him leaving you. The other one is, and
by the way, there's the best advice ever given on
the radio anywhere in the world. But the other one is,
if you can count to ten. I know it sounds
(13:38):
so simple, and but I had a boss who's the
greatest boss I ever had, and he taught me that.
He said, man, if you can count to ten, and
he goes, cause here's the thing. You're gonna lose your shit.
You're gonna yell at somebody. They're still stupid they're still wrong,
and you're gonna have to apologize, you know, and they're
still gonna be wrong, you know. So he said, if
you can count to ten and just it will do
(14:02):
more for you if I don't give you anything else
in my thirty eight years that I learned from him
because I had just got through I mean, I crawled
up this woman a woman, actually was a guy. I
almost said that wrong. It was a guy. I crawled
up his ass for screwing up and yelled at him
so hard that I think he almost cried. And and
he went to HR and said, Bam, it was mean
(14:25):
to me, you know. And HR and this manager. I
end up in my manager's office and he goes, look,
you can't yell at people like that. He goes, you know,
you do fun radio job. You have a fun job.
This is a job to them, a regular job. They're
not having any fun. And then when the one guy
that they look up to comes in there and yells
at him, kind of is not good. And then you
(14:45):
get the reputation of being a jerk, you know. So
if you can count to ten, all right, that was
alphabet bald. If you're bald, that is no longer and
we all owe Jason statum thank you for that.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
You know, so that is exactly right. It's funny that's
as high up on the list as it is because
the roommate sent me a god it was from one
of these, uh you know, one of these female rag magazines,
like Cosmo or something, and there was a whole article
about how it's the summer of bald apparently, like because look,
(15:22):
I've got long hair, but we've got some signs of.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Look at me. Yeah money, I mean.
Speaker 2 (15:30):
I'm fighting the urge to be self conscious about it,
and she's sending me articles like, look, no bald is
bald is hot? Now you have nothing to worry about.
Speaker 1 (15:38):
I wish I had I wish I had my own
ball cap company because ball caps became the thing to wear.
But anyway, they said started with Bruce Willis, but really,
Jason is is a is the one to thank for that.
Uh uh. He's good looking man, you know, he's and
he's in a he does ten he does he's he's
(16:00):
in h He's ten million a movie. Now, Jason state
of is good for him.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
My favorite thing about him is like, so he plays
all of these hitman badasses, you know, he is a
absolute like stage theater oh yeah, on the like school
of Shakespeare. Like he is the antithesis of what he
plays in all of these big budget action movies. He's
(16:25):
actually really like kind of softer stage theatrical, classic theater guy.
Speaker 1 (16:33):
Absolutely, and he's a real He's a true, true Thesbian.
And he was a swimmer. I think it was Olympic
swimmers where he had got known. I want to say
Australia or New Zealand. I don't remember which one. Whatever,
he's wherever he's from, he was a Olympic swimmer from there,
and that's where he stayed fit and all that. All right,
let's see I got a oh uh, you drive a
(16:55):
cool car that was number three there. If you are
worried that you're not in a Aborghini or Ferrari or
you know, when you're driving over there in the Chevy,
the Chevy Scrotum or whatever. V yeah, you're worried. As
long as it's clean. One of their things was a
nasty car. If you had a nasty car, and I'm
(17:18):
not about inside, didn't necessarily be clean the outside, but
if your car was filthy inside, they you're out. You're
immediately out.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
By the way, even even from a guy's perspective, like
you know, before I was married, whenever I would date
girls and see that their car was absolutely a wreck
with trash and all kinds of stuff, that was a
massive red flag to me of like, no, absolutely not.
Speaker 1 (17:43):
It's your apartment that's going to be my house if
we end up together. You don't care. You don't ever
want to look like you don't care. Number two was
if you didn't have big muscles, if you weren't like
a bodybuilder. Guys are always worried about how they look
their bodies. You know, they have peck implants and all
that kind of ship getting implants. Yeah, cal can you
(18:05):
imagine that? I mean, I don't want anything. Yeah, you
know I had my no better than I do that.
I've already pushed you pretty. I told you that one.
I can't tell that. I tell all these jokes. I
can't tell remember the guy with the uh the guy
(18:26):
with the deep voice. Oh yeah, that one. I love
that joke. Should we tell it again? Just because it's
just the greatest.
Speaker 2 (18:34):
Joke used that joke since you shared it with me,
that's how much.
Speaker 1 (18:39):
Here it is? All right? This is the joke. I
swear to God, if you call him bitch any of y'all,
I'm gonna just I'm gonna funt you down. All right,
So listen, here's the here's maybe my favorite joke all time.
So this guy, let's end it with this. Okay, Well
I'll do number one. Number one was height. You were
worried about height? Okay, don't because that's not a big
deal and absolutely all right. So here's this end with
(19:01):
the joke, maybe my favorite. I have one more of
this favor. I just literally cannot tell on the air,
but this one I can tell.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
So this guy goes to the doctor and he said,
the doctor, my boy is a little People can't understand me.
It's affecting my business. I can't people can't understand me.
I'm a salesman. And so the doctor goes, well, let's
give you a physical see what's going on. So go
ahead and get undressed, and he does the guy and
then the doct goes, well, there's your problem right there.
I mean, your business is like two feet long and
(19:30):
it's pulling down on your vocal cords. So that's what's
going on here. Let me I tell you what we'll
do we'll do an operation and we'll cut half of
it off and then maybe people can understand you. So
he does it, and sure enough, the guy now people
can understand him. He's just business is booming, he's he's
doing great. He said, God, thanks to every better. I
(19:52):
need to go back and thank this doctor. And so
he walks in his doctor, wonderful everything you did for me.
I just can't help but thank you so much, and
the doctor goes very welcome, thank you very much. That's
(20:20):
my favorite hoard that's going to get out on. Right there,
you're listening to Bell and you'll be telling that damn
joke here ten minutes to somebody. So don't act like,
oh my god, I'm offended. If you're offended, you probably
weren't listening now anyway, So it's uh, anyway, I love
that joke. It's a Maama Brown experience on the iHeart
Podcast Network
Hey, you're listening to the Mamma Brown Experience the iHeart
Podcast Network, three hundred thousand podcasts, and you chose this one.
What's wrong with you? I don't know. I appreciate thousands
of people who are listening a lot of us because
of Puma, the Big Cat. The Big Puma has a
Sports Cave and he produces this show and co host
(00:23):
with me, and I always appreciate that. Thank you very
much for be no show without Puma.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Promise you I'll always fun riding along with you. Almost
through another week here. But yeah, if you need a
little sports fix this weekend, go back and catch up
on this week's episodes of The Sports Cave with Biggest Puma.
Anywhere you get your podcasts, just search for that in
the search bar and get caught up. Got live Monday
(00:47):
and Wednesday on YouTube. But the audio episodes are always
there for you. Get you through a weekend.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Number one sports podcast and our whole deal. I mean,
it's everybody loves the Puma, the Big Cat as we
like to call him from from the Old School movie.
That's where the Big Cat came from. This is he
loves when I do these boneheads. What we'll call the boneheads,
the criminals that are stupid that may and I could
do one every ten minutes. I mean, there's so many
(01:13):
hard to pick. But yeah, So Richard Perua something like that.
He's in Lion County, Kentucky. Richard got d UI, got
pulled over and he's drunk and then they put him
in a cop car and they impounded his personal vehicle.
Now he was arrested, boasts bail. He gets out, he
(01:33):
goes to the impound yard, cuts a hole in the
fence because he wants his cocaine out of the trunk
this impounded car. Didn't try to take the car like
in the movies. He was trying to just get his coke.
And guess what, they monitor that. They know you're going
to try that, so they've got cameras and everything ready
for when you do that. And sure enough caught second time.
(01:54):
So now he's for sure going away for a while.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Let's add some additional charges of that original bad decision, shallow.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
That weren't smart. That wasn't a smart move on your part.
All right, So I thought just today we would hit
something here I thought was pretty interesting. Short and sweet.
They interviewed a huge amount of single women, and they
wanted to know what was the myths. All the myths,
the top ten myths will even say that women believe
(02:26):
or that single guys believe that women are thinking. You know,
And so I'm going to start at number I'm gonna
do nine because ten I didn't think was that interesting.
Nine was they they like it? Well, i'll tell you ten.
They hate DJs.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
Now this list is trash DJ's.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
I think they're the hot ship. That's that's the ones
they're gonna like. All right, So number nine was they
actually do like a guy that is that is passionate
about his hobby. Now, if you're doing whatever your hobby is,
model trains, it could be you know, legos, whatever it is.
You're worried that she's going to find out that you
(03:06):
do this crap. It's not that she likes that you're passionate.
It doesn't matter what it's about with single women, according
to them. Now, they surveyed something like a thousand, so
don't know, it should be fairly accurate all of these. So,
but uh, if you're single, Uh, this is this is guys,
This isn't women. These are these are guys what they
(03:27):
think women think and that's why they're they don't ever
ask women out. There's you know, when you meet a
group of women, say down, they go. Nobody ever asked
me out. It's hard to meet guys. And here's why,
because they have these preconceptions they're gonna get shot down.
And no guy wants to get shot down. He just
his ego is so large. Hit and that's everybody. They
just couldn't take it, you know, and it and it's
(03:49):
tough to do. Now, that was it? Hobbies? What what
was your hobby? Uh? You have your mustang, your car,
guy like me.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
So I think the you know, when and when the
roommate and I first started dating, my hobby was still
I mean I was still playing a lot of uh
you know, like intermural sports, are still playing in men's
leagues and still trying to play. I think, you know,
obviously the obvious hobby is if I'm home, sitting on
(04:20):
the couch, I'm watching sports. There's something, there's something that
was the biggest hobby that took some took some adjustment time.
And I do I absolutely believe that women love to
see you passionate about a hobby. But I also think
there's probably a hierarchy to certain hobbies with certain women,
you know, like for me, sports being a hobby that
(04:43):
was more attractive to my wife than if I was
into like magic the gathering or dune dragons. You know,
Like the video games are kind of on the line
to begin with.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Yeah, that and that's I think a lot of guys,
older guys, The video games are fine as long as that.
And I say this about cars, boats, hunting, golf. If
you're living, if you've got her living, or you're living
in a single wide with the side missing out of it,
and then you've got a forty thousand dollars boat out there. Priorities,
(05:13):
priorities not you know, don't let it, don't let it
overtake you, you know, and so make sure that you
have a nice place. In other words, separate it. Let's
put it that way. I think that's the word. Separation
of your hobby. So you could be passionate, but you
don't look like an idiot. Number eight was a cool job.
(05:34):
Many many guys were worried that they didn't have a
cool enough job for the women. And to the women
it didn't matter. They as long as you are on
a bum, as long as you aren't ten jobs in
the time they date. Yet you know, as a lot
of that you know and then moving around. That makes sense.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
But as someone who has benefited multiple times from having
a cool, a fairly cool job.
Speaker 1 (05:59):
Yes, her job's cool, cool, access like.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
It, I can see it. Just don't be a bomb
like you said, right, something steady, consistent and you'll be fine.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
And if you don't have enough money, there are plenty
of second jobs you can do. I had to do
two jobs my whole life so that my daughter could
become a lawyer and go to Baylor Law which, let
me tell you, oh, there was some do without while
she was there for two and a half years because
and I had to sell everything I had to pay
for it. But my daughter doesn't have a half million
(06:31):
dollars with student loans now. She went to Old Miss
for her undergrad and I love Old Miss because their
motto was, hell, we'll take you. There wasn't a big qualified.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
Wait, you want to move to Mississippi Goodness, that was
a yeah, we'll pay for the travel trailer, come on.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
She literally, she literally loved that school, loved her life there,
and she wouldn't take four it. She loved Old miss
she was at Baylor Law though there was no school.
It was just going to law school. There wasn't any
like going out going to Pepper Olly her as shit,
She's like, dude, if you're going to do something like that,
and at that point, you know when you're doing, you're
what you're going to be a school you need to study,
(07:12):
and boy she did. I was very proud. She's a
very successful divorce attorney now. And she's already told me
she'll handle my mom or my wife and my mom
say my wife is my mom, and she'll tell you
that that's part of the reason that would end up
like that, all right. Number seven, Uh was, uh, if
you were rich, it guy just kind of goes back
(07:32):
to the job thing. But guys are worried or not rich,
and women are only interested in the guy that's just
totally loaded. So she's most women almost one hundred percent
on that one. Women said absolutely not. They're more interested
in someone who's kind than they are someone who's rich
and a prick. You as someone who's kind and and uh,
(07:54):
you know, I want to I'll use an example to me.
The perfect guy like that would be Carter on Er.
Remember Carter He was. He was a multi multi maybe
a billionaire air but he was still a great guy,
a nice guy, you know. So my wife loves him
and loved the e R. But she loves the new
show he's on. He's on another show where he plays
an e R doctor. I mean it's the Rain. Yeah
(08:16):
the Pit, Yeah, yeah, the pit, And so watch that
if you're a Carter. Carter fan. I watched a movie
with him and uh uh, I can't remember who the
girl was. I think it was j Lo, one of them. Anyway, Uh,
he was a stalker. He was a bad guy. I
didn't know he played a bad guy this, you know,
a long time ago. But uh, it wasn't Jaylo with
(08:38):
somebody else. J Loo had another stalker movie and I thought, ship,
jay Loo, we're all stalking you. Come on, I mean,
give me a.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
Break, make a movie about this every time.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Yeah. And I'm sure if you went up to Ja
Loo and said hey baby, you know, and by the
time you were even close, there's some guy got you
in a choke hold, I'm sure. But but Ben affleck
that movie a hint. I mean that picture of him
the foot at the basketball game and the look on
his face and jay lo and ever fighting in the
look on his face, there's no matter no matter how
(09:09):
pretty she is, somebody somewhere sick of her shit.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Why remember absolutely.
Speaker 1 (09:19):
The look on his face. And he sees Jennifer Garner.
I gave him Jennifer Garner and I got jay lo
Ah out.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
But then he goes back to Jennifer Garner and then
we get the picture of him smoking the cigarette outside
the house again just like, Oh, man, I just can't win.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
I can't, I can't take it. He just, oh, it's
just you. I don't feel sorry for him because he's
been with jay lo and Jennifer Garner. But still, okay,
so that's rich, that's covers. They say, as long as
you're kind and money won't hurt. But you know, you
don't have to be luded. But you don't. As a father,
you do. You've come around mid all. You better have
(09:58):
some cash enough take care of dad anyway. Playing hard
to get was number six. Do not play hard to get?
Women hate that, you think they they you know, they
go for the bad boy. They didn't always go for
the bad boy. You're you're uh, what was it? Uh?
Speaker 2 (10:16):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (10:16):
I can't tell that one on there Okay, I got it.
I kind of can was lady bought a Uh, I
don't know how to I'm gonna use the word of cessorize.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Okay, okay, all right.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
Cess arise and you can fill in the blank. So
if lady wanted to get get her she wanted to
get her niece a doll, so she went to the store,
the toy store, and she said, I want to get
a Barbie doll for my niece. And she goes, okay,
and she buys the Barbie doll and she said, you know, oh,
(10:54):
I just thought, uh does does uh? Does she come
with Ken? And the salesperson said no, Uh, she accessorizes
with g I Joe. She she dates can't. Yeah, I
(11:18):
don't think it's censorized fiction. I don't know. See we're
not covered by us. He says, how much is ship
I can get away with?
Speaker 2 (11:26):
That was what I wish people could see the wheels
turning in your head as you're trying to figure out
how to have like.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
We get fired or not. Let me let me clear
some of everybody. I'm no longer on the radio on
kVA anymore. I don't do it on everybody do this podcast,
but still with iHeart. And they do have some you know,
they got some standards. They don't want us to mess up,
but uh, I don't. I really don't care, you know,
as far as getting in trouble or anything. I mean,
(11:54):
they won't fire me. They can't any time and they
know that. And we've had that discussion anyway. Okay, that
was playing hard to get, all right? The alpha dog.
They do not like an alpha dog. They think, you know,
when you think, oh I'm the guy, I'm running the show.
They said they're tired of that. Now this is once again,
this is a women. If you just joined us as women,
(12:15):
who I guess it's not like radio where they just
join us. They've been here for the whole deal. So, uh,
this is women. What guys believe in the myth that
they think women think the alpha male is a deal.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
And I think these last couple of you know, the
playing hard to get or the alpha male, I think
it's just don't be one hundred percent that because there
needs to be some still balance, Like you can't just be.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
A confidence is attractive, but over confidence or being a
dick that's not attractive.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
An alpha asshole, and don't be a beta cook like
find out a balance between the two of those.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
And to other people, they really judge how you, you know,
early on in the relationship, how you treat other people.
And I have found that it just doesn't matter losing
your shit over anything. It just maybe because I'm sixty seven,
but I just don't really get all worked up anymore.
I mean, sometimes my blood sugar will jump. You know,
it's an old guy thing with diabetes. But and that'll
(13:16):
make me, you know, stupid, mean, but you man, live.
The thing is about I had a boss one time,
and time it's the best advice I can give you. Besides, ladies,
take care of business at home. You won't have to
worry about him leaving you. The other one is, and
by the way, there's the best advice ever given on
the radio anywhere in the world. But the other one is,
if you can count to ten. I know it sounds
(13:38):
so simple, and but I had a boss who's the
greatest boss I ever had, and he taught me that.
He said, man, if you can count to ten, and
he goes, cause here's the thing. You're gonna lose your shit.
You're gonna yell at somebody. They're still stupid they're still wrong,
and you're gonna have to apologize, you know, and they're
still gonna be wrong, you know. So he said, if
you can count to ten and just it will do
(14:02):
more for you if I don't give you anything else
in my thirty eight years that I learned from him
because I had just got through I mean, I crawled
up this woman a woman, actually was a guy. I
almost said that wrong. It was a guy. I crawled
up his ass for screwing up and yelled at him
so hard that I think he almost cried. And and
he went to HR and said, Bam, it was mean
(14:25):
to me, you know. And HR and this manager. I
end up in my manager's office and he goes, look,
you can't yell at people like that. He goes, you know,
you do fun radio job. You have a fun job.
This is a job to them, a regular job. They're
not having any fun. And then when the one guy
that they look up to comes in there and yells
at him, kind of is not good. And then you
(14:45):
get the reputation of being a jerk, you know. So
if you can count to ten, all right, that was
alphabet bald. If you're bald, that is no longer and
we all owe Jason statum thank you for that.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
You know, so that is exactly right. It's funny that's
as high up on the list as it is because
the roommate sent me a god it was from one
of these, uh you know, one of these female rag magazines,
like Cosmo or something, and there was a whole article
about how it's the summer of bald apparently, like because look,
(15:22):
I've got long hair, but we've got some signs of.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Look at me. Yeah money, I mean.
Speaker 2 (15:30):
I'm fighting the urge to be self conscious about it,
and she's sending me articles like, look, no bald is
bald is hot? Now you have nothing to worry about.
Speaker 1 (15:38):
I wish I had I wish I had my own
ball cap company because ball caps became the thing to wear.
But anyway, they said started with Bruce Willis, but really,
Jason is is a is the one to thank for that.
Uh uh. He's good looking man, you know, he's and
he's in a he does ten he does he's he's
(16:00):
in h He's ten million a movie. Now, Jason state
of is good for him.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
My favorite thing about him is like, so he plays
all of these hitman badasses, you know, he is a
absolute like stage theater oh yeah, on the like school
of Shakespeare. Like he is the antithesis of what he
plays in all of these big budget action movies. He's
(16:25):
actually really like kind of softer stage theatrical, classic theater guy.
Speaker 1 (16:33):
Absolutely, and he's a real He's a true, true Thesbian.
And he was a swimmer. I think it was Olympic
swimmers where he had got known. I want to say
Australia or New Zealand. I don't remember which one. Whatever,
he's wherever he's from, he was a Olympic swimmer from there,
and that's where he stayed fit and all that. All right,
let's see I got a oh uh, you drive a
(16:55):
cool car that was number three there. If you are
worried that you're not in a Aborghini or Ferrari or
you know, when you're driving over there in the Chevy,
the Chevy Scrotum or whatever. V yeah, you're worried. As
long as it's clean. One of their things was a
nasty car. If you had a nasty car, and I'm
(17:18):
not about inside, didn't necessarily be clean the outside, but
if your car was filthy inside, they you're out. You're
immediately out.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
By the way, even even from a guy's perspective, like
you know, before I was married, whenever I would date
girls and see that their car was absolutely a wreck
with trash and all kinds of stuff, that was a
massive red flag to me of like, no, absolutely not.
Speaker 1 (17:43):
It's your apartment that's going to be my house if
we end up together. You don't care. You don't ever
want to look like you don't care. Number two was
if you didn't have big muscles, if you weren't like
a bodybuilder. Guys are always worried about how they look
their bodies. You know, they have peck implants and all
that kind of ship getting implants. Yeah, cal can you
(18:05):
imagine that? I mean, I don't want anything. Yeah, you
know I had my no better than I do that.
I've already pushed you pretty. I told you that one.
I can't tell that. I tell all these jokes. I
can't tell remember the guy with the uh the guy
(18:26):
with the deep voice. Oh yeah, that one. I love
that joke. Should we tell it again? Just because it's
just the greatest.
Speaker 2 (18:34):
Joke used that joke since you shared it with me,
that's how much.
Speaker 1 (18:39):
Here it is? All right? This is the joke. I
swear to God, if you call him bitch any of y'all,
I'm gonna just I'm gonna funt you down. All right,
So listen, here's the here's maybe my favorite joke all time.
So this guy, let's end it with this. Okay, Well
I'll do number one. Number one was height. You were
worried about height? Okay, don't because that's not a big
deal and absolutely all right. So here's this end with
(19:01):
the joke, maybe my favorite. I have one more of
this favor. I just literally cannot tell on the air,
but this one I can tell.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
So this guy goes to the doctor and he said,
the doctor, my boy is a little People can't understand me.
It's affecting my business. I can't people can't understand me.
I'm a salesman. And so the doctor goes, well, let's
give you a physical see what's going on. So go
ahead and get undressed, and he does the guy and
then the doct goes, well, there's your problem right there.
I mean, your business is like two feet long and
(19:30):
it's pulling down on your vocal cords. So that's what's
going on here. Let me I tell you what we'll
do we'll do an operation and we'll cut half of
it off and then maybe people can understand you. So
he does it, and sure enough, the guy now people
can understand him. He's just business is booming, he's he's
doing great. He said, God, thanks to every better. I
(19:52):
need to go back and thank this doctor. And so
he walks in his doctor, wonderful everything you did for me.
I just can't help but thank you so much, and
the doctor goes very welcome, thank you very much. That's
(20:20):
my favorite hoard that's going to get out on. Right there,
you're listening to Bell and you'll be telling that damn
joke here ten minutes to somebody. So don't act like,
oh my god, I'm offended. If you're offended, you probably
weren't listening now anyway, So it's uh, anyway, I love
that joke. It's a Maama Brown experience on the iHeart
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