348: ‘I wish we had sex more.’ (ft. Violet Lange)

A common pattern in a lot of love relationships sounds like one partner (often a man, in a man/woman dynamic) saying things like:

• "I wish you weren’t so busy with the kids."
• "You never dress up for me anymore."
• "I wish you'd flirt with me more."
• "You hide yourself from me; I never really see your body anymore."
• "I wish we had more sex."

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What's driving this, and how does a couple navigate it skillfully? A lot of men yearn for more sexual connection with their partner -- but it's not just about the sex. And the way a lot of men go about talking about this with their woman partner ends up being triggering for the woman.

Here we discuss what we've witnessed in terms of men's deep desire for not just sex, but their partner's enthusiastic participation. And we dive right into what's even underneath that: The ache to feel her feminine essence.

This is about more than just incorporating sex toys or trying out a new position. This is about the depth and power and range of the open feminine. Get ready for a hell of a ride!

Memorable quotes from this episode

• “I wasn’t open and didn’t know how to open.”
• “To the men, it’s like a vitamin.”
• “It’s the sense of aliveness as it changes moment to moment.”
• “A lot of times what women are hearing is, ‘I’m not enough.’”
• “I want to feel lust for life! I want to feel playful and lighthearted and irreverent.”
• “The essence of the feminine is desire and emotion.”
• “When women are in their full range, the relationship accelerates.”
• “I want you to enjoy it; I want you feel your pleasure and your desire, and I know that’s in you.”

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Mentioned on this episode:

• Please Her In Bed: A Course for Men, Designed by Women (www.pleaseherinbed.com)
• ROSE Code by Violet Lange: www.violetlange.com/rosecode