CONFESSING MY NIGHTMARE

In tonight’s episode of ‘Crystal’s Nightcap’ the 50 part tiktoker gets signed to a major agency, why Drake’s leaks really got leaked, a squatter in the house, and I confess what happened in my nightmare, and MORE!

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Hello to your beautiful brain bubble.It's Crystal Odal Saz back with another episode
of Crystal's Nightcap. Tonight the fiftypart TikToker gets signed to a major agency.
Why Drake's Leaks really got leaked?A squatter in the house, and
I confess what happened in my nightmareGet Usa. My name is Crystal Rosas.
I'm a twenty something Latina who justmoved from California to the Big Apple's

(00:24):
Happy Sorry that was my cat frappuccino. They're still getting used to the city
life. Anyways, Where was Iam? Oh yeah, I take over
afternoon radio every day on the worldfamous Z one hundred. But when night
falls, I'm looking for all thecloud I can get and casually searching these
streets for my prince Charming. Comeon this sexy single journey where we'll go

(00:44):
on a date with a new guyfrom the apps every week, host red
carpets and interviews, and weasele ourway into the secret society of New York's
top social life. Oh yeah,and someone's always watching. That's my overprotective
mom. This is Carystal's Nightcap.Happy hump Day, and thank you for
hanging out for another episode of Currystal'sNightcap. Please subscribe if you haven't shared

(01:07):
the pod. If you're at eleven, it's We're Live in New York City
Monday through Friday two to six pmon Z one hundred. I'm on tons
of stations across the countries on theweekends, and I'm also with you most
likely at your closest top forty stationevery night with the new hit List eleven
to midnight. So just look thatup and if I'm not, then just
hang out with me every single weeknighton our free iHeartRadio app. Just look

(01:29):
up the new hit list and I'mactually just like sharing only new songs on
there, like the Poppin' the best, only new songs for you every single
night. Kind of cool, huh, I know, kind of big things,
kind of loving it. Hope you'rehaving a great week so far,
Happy hump Day on everything. I'mat La Crystal Litlesas so you can follow
me there. And now we're gonnaget into it, starting off with the

(01:52):
trending topics this past week with sharingthe cheese manome yo, have you seen?
Did she out through it? Ohmy god, we can't believe it.
We're sharing the cheese man, We'resharing the chiefe man. Now,
the most important thing that's happening isTeresa Resa Tisa Johnson, the creator of

(02:17):
the quote, who the f didI marry? Fifty part series on TikTok
If you don't know, like,I'm sure you heard about this, Like
this was the biggest headline. Imaginea fifty part series TikTok. One TikTok
can be ten minutes. Quick littlealgebra, fifty times ten divided by eight

(02:38):
That was wrong, five hundred eighteight divided by five hundred. Wait,
five hundred divided by sixty eight hours, eight hours. This woman put eight
hours worth of content out. Shegained over a million TikTok followers. Each

(03:00):
video alone was like millions of views, which was crazy, seventeen million likes
on all of her content. Youknow that she just blew up because she
was airing out her quote husband thatlied about this was so crazy. Like
in case you just want to quicklike one second synopsis. She was dating

(03:24):
a guy who promised to like bea homeowner and buy a house and like
all these things. That was flexingall this stuff, and the moral of
a story was he was pretending tobe his actual twin brother who was the
real successful one, and he wasa fraud. If you grew up watching
Even Stevens on Disney Channel, hewas like Loomis. He was like Even

(03:47):
Stevens's evil twin brother Loomis. Imean, it was just craziness. And
she's obviously blown up. Now.She just got signed to one of the
biggest talent agencies in the world CIACreative Artist Creative Artists agencies are I'm really
sick, so bear with me.It's kind of hard for me to talk

(04:08):
right now. But she just gotsigned to CAA and we're talking Margot Robbie
Chloe and Hallie Bailey, Demi Levado, just some of the biggest names in
movies in music calling cap or nakedsports and people are like, okay,
and what like what are you gonnado? What do you mean? What

(04:28):
are you gonna do? Like?This woman is exceptional storytelling at detailing.
She is going to have a showlike Catfish where we expose men or women,
but hopefully mostly men for their lyinghabits. That's what I'm predicting is
gonna happen. That's what I wantto see. This was just honestly a

(04:50):
regular s regular woman who got incrediblydisgustingly got by a man and decided to
turn that into TikTok fame. Andnow she's up with the elites. She
really is up with the tom cruisesof the world. So round of applause.
That is the American dream. Thatright there is the American dream to

(05:12):
turn your heartbreak into a viral TikToksaga and then become world famous because of
it. So all respect to her, all flowers to her. I cannot
wait to see what she has forus. See, I didn't sit down
and watch the whole thing. Imean literally it was eight hours. Interest
me, I'm on my phone forlike eight hours, I'd be scrolling.

(05:32):
I'd be death scrolling for days.My screen time is really disgusting and actually
I should start going to therapy againbecause of it. But there are incredible
summaries of her fifty part eight hourTikTok series. You know you can go
check it out, just like searchit up on TikTok. Congratulations to her.
That was, like, for me, the most important thing that's happened

(05:55):
this past week. Also, Ilove the beef between this TikTok talking News,
this TikTok choreographer and Nicki Minaj's team. All right, so there's this
TikTok choreographer slash dancer. His nameis Dante Collie and he went viral this
past winter because he is like oneof the standouts that did a TikTok choreography

(06:17):
to Nicki Minaj's ft CEU F theClub Up, F the Club Up,
that part where she goes like,Hi, heels on my tippies, don't
say incabana, best on my cheecheese. If you don't know, it's
okay. Not everyone knows, butit went mad viral, and then nick

(06:38):
Minaj just kicked off her tour ahout to Oakland. She kicked out look
at Nikki Given Oakland Love. Shekicked it off at the Oracle in Oakland.
And that section of that song,that dance she used the TikTok choreography
that was going viral by Dante Collie, right, And when he saw this,

(07:01):
he was like WHOA, Like Icame up with this, I'm the
original choreographer to this. I didn'tget credit, Like, what's going on?
I didn't get compensated? What's goingon? Niku Minaj herself saw this
on Twitter. She is very tappedinto Twitter and honestly Instagram too, but
like she's on Twitter a lot,she has Twitter fingers, right, and

(07:25):
she tried to make great. Shesaid something along the lines of, oh
my goodness, I'm so sorry.I thought it was our own choreographers.
I was taught by my choreographers.So don't worry. We're gonna make do
We're gonna do right by you.We're gonna get you paid. She said
paid. She said paid and yourcredit right. So that's all we heard.
Now. Dantel Dantell was like,I'm gonna let everybody know what really

(07:49):
is going on because nick Image's teamreached out to me and they tried to
give me concert tickets to her show, and they only tried to pay me
one hundred dollars for my choreography.Excuse me, that is not my rate
and I deserve more than that.Like this is crazy to me. He
went off, and he went off, I mean, he respectfully went off,

(08:11):
like you don't want to upset thebarbs. I am a barb.
I love Nikki's new album. Ican always see her here when she pulls
up to Barclays. Actually, she'sdoing Barclays animiss she I think I love
Nicki Minaj. I have had mypast where it's like it is really hard
to fully be a bar because sometimesshe does things where you're like, why
did you do that? Why'd yousay that? Why did you do that?

(08:33):
And I've had my love and haterelationship with Nikki, But at the
end of the day, I dolove Nikki, like I love her artistry
and I think she's amazing as anartist and what she's done for women period.
So besides that, yeah, youdon't want to upset the barb.
So he was being respectful, he'sbeing trying to be professional, but then

(08:54):
one of Nikki's choreographers, her realchoreographer, right claps back at him and
was like, oh my goodness,Like, you're crazy. You wanted to
come on stage and do a stagething with her, and you were requesting
crazy amounts of money for an eightcount sir, an eight count humble yourself.

(09:18):
You're just being very unrealistic about whatyou were demanding from us. You're
not gonna come on and we're notgonna pay for a whole outfit for you,
for staging, for you, forswitching up lighting and everything just to
bring you on stage with us.Not even Nicki's choreographers are on stage with
her. We choreograph, choreogra Wechoreograph. We have professional dancers we hire,

(09:45):
and they're the ones that do thedances. We're not just gonna bring
you on because you did an eightcount, which was wow. I mean,
okay, I see that too.I definitely see that side too,
which is true. And then alsohe was demanding that Nikki reposted him and
like tagged him and things allegedly,right, this is all alleged, and
that Dontell rejected them offering him reallygood tickets and a main greet for Nikki,

(10:09):
which would have been amazing. Nota lot of people get to me,
nigmonaje, So that alone. Peoplepay a lot of money to me
Nicki. People pay a lot ofmoney to see Nikki at her concerts.
Let alone meet her and like geta chance to speak with her. Like,
I think that alone would have beenreally good compensation. But I'm at

(10:31):
a choreographer at the end of theday. So if he feels like he
should have gotten his back right up, then that is his right to feel
that way. What do I thinkI think that this could have kind of
led him to things that he wantedto do if he would have It's kind
of hard because it's like, youdon't really want to tell someone like that

(10:52):
the value they're putting on themselves isn'tworth it. But there at the end
of the day, there are alot of people that go viral. There
are a lot of people that goviral on TikTok for choreography and they don't
get the claims, they don't getpaid for that. Like, it's kind
of hard to put money on thingslike that, right because it's art.
And if I were him, honestly, I would have taken up all those

(11:15):
things, even if it wasn't alot of money. Just the fact to
meet Nikki would have been everything.But if he didn't, and we'll see
what ends up happening. I Imean, because Nikki doesn't want to look
bad. But also nik he's notgonna get got That's what's not gonna happen.
No one's gonna get over on Nickmanage with their demands. So we'll

(11:39):
see what ends up happening. Butas of now, it looks like he's
he's not gonna be on stage dancingwith Nikki, and if you're a choreographer,
then you can't really expect that either. Just be happy that your dance
made it to there, and thennow you can do classes like Nicki Minaj
dance classes. And I took aI took a Beyonce choreography class one time

(12:01):
in the Bay in San Francisco.This is when she did her Bachella for
Formation and I paid I think likethirty bucks for that. There was like
one hundred of us there, SoI think that's something that he could have
capitalized with the situation instead of tryingto capitalize on Nikki herself. So we'll
see what happens. What you don'twant, ever, is the Barb's coming

(12:22):
after you, and the Barbs camewith vengeance after him because he was trying
to slander the Barb community. Soall love and good entergy to him and
them, and the Barbs love you, guys. Moving along to one of
Nicki's bestie's, Drake, Well,they did beef for a little bit when
the whole Meek Mill stuff happened,but they've become friends again since then.
And we all know that Drake hadthe leak. Honestly at the Century,

(12:46):
like I think that this leak wason board on par with the Vanessa Hudgens
leak and the Jennifer Lawrence. Yeah, way way bigger I think than the
Jennifer Laurence leap. Like this isthis was a really big leak on different
situations. And also it is unfortunate, like the double standard of leaked videos

(13:07):
when it comes to women and men. You know, women we get slandered
for stuff like that whenever a video, an intimate video or some pictures get
leaked, but men actually, likemen will get slandered if the video is
in their favor, and men willget praised if the video is in their

(13:28):
favor. Which who was the artistarn for that wrapper that got leaked and
everyone was like that was weak,like that was very weak. I don't
know if it was like blue Faceor twenty one sep. I don't remember
who it was andnetheless, we allknow that a video of Drake on his
private jet facing a mirror in hisbed on the private jeg got leaked and

(13:48):
it shook It shook everyone and shookthe world. And we're kind of finding
out more about what had happened now. There is a podcaster Adam twenty two.
He does this a lot of likeadults content, and he's homies with
Drake. Now, Drake actually reachedout to Adam. This is what Adam

(14:09):
was saying, because Adam was like, bro, you wanted this to leak,
we know, we get it,and Drake wanted to confront him privately
about that. This is what Adamis saying. He said that Drake reached
out to me because I was givinghim ish. I was saying, you
wanted this to leak, you lovethis ish? But he said no,
no, no, it's not mybrand. He says. But I think
it might have been like a hostagenegotiation where somebody was trying to get money

(14:33):
out of Drake to not leak thevideo, because Drake told me that he
had known about it for a coupleof weeks prior to it coming out,
So I'm guessing that's what they wereprobably trying to get money out of him
and he was not willing to doit. I need you to understand that
at any point, your cloud canbe attacked by the hackers. I do

(14:56):
not, and I've been very honestabout this. I do not take pics
like that. I never have myface in any picks, no face,
no case. I'm very careful aboutthose things. It's tough sometimes in long
distance relationships, but you gotta protectyour privacy. And that was very bold
to Drake to have that video openthere. I mean, everybody knows.

(15:16):
I just don't understand, like everybodyknows that they can get hacked. It's
like, why are you doing videoslike this? But you know, maybe
you feel invincible, but even themost powerful and strongest and longest and growthiest
man in the world is not invincibleto hackers. It's a pretty unfortunate situation
to be blackmailed like this. Iam not questioning this. I don't think

(15:39):
that this is a lie. Itis not good for Drake's brand to be
leaked like that. It would havebeen worse if we were all displeased with
the leak. The fact that theleak was fine and fair, maybe it
makes Drake a little less annoyed aboutthis and his brand. But nonetheless,

(16:02):
like he has a kid, youknow, and he does have a pretty
clean brand. You don't see himbeing a hot mess everywhere. He's pretty
buttoned up. Drake is really oneof the most buttoned up for the most
part, people a Triple A listcelebrities, right, So I don't think
that this was on purpose. Ireally don't. He doesn't need that clout.
Drake can do anything and get clout. He don't need to be leaking

(16:22):
videos like that to get clout.I do think that if he was put
in one of these blackmail situations,that's just the best thing to do is
just to be like, you knowwhat, I'm not. You're probably gonna
put it out one day. Nomatter what. You cannot win in a
blackmail situation. The only way towin is to not be put in a
blackmail situation. And no, Ihave content like that out there, but
you know, it is what itis, and sometimes there's stuff that we

(16:45):
can't really control. So I getit. And you know, you can't
judge anyone for what they do.Me personally, I just don't. I'm
scared of things like this, Sothat's why I would not and who would
want to happen to me? Andnobody cares about me, But I would
just be very, very embarrassed aboutsomething like that. So Drake, congratulations
because your leak ended up working outin your favor. I don't think that

(17:07):
anyone was angry about that or brandswere upset. Yes, it's not on
brand for you. But I maybeif Drake would have told us, hey,
listen, someone's blackmailing me and here, we wouldn't have believed him.
I think that if he straight upjust said that, no one would have

(17:29):
believed him. So I think thatDrake is doing the best thing by telling
people on the low in the industrywho he knows will have big mouths and
talk about it out loud so thatwe understand what actually happened. But he
doesn't have to say it himself.Drake sit down with oprah Man. We
needed to sit down with Alex Cooper. We want to hear everything. I

(17:52):
hope you will one day. Drakeis very specific. He only talks to
and does interviews with his own peers, like he'll sit down with like Little
Yachty or like Craycross or like FrenchMontana, But he will never sit down
with a woman for a conversation Numberone or any outlets ever. And that's
just because of Drake's cloud. Hecould do that, but you and he

(18:15):
says a lot in his music.He does. He does give us a
lot in his music. But yeah, if I were getting black mailed.
I would just let them do it, because, like I said, you
can't win. What would you havedone if you were Drake? And that
really was a situation. I don'tknow what else you can do. You're
not gonna give somebody money because I'sgonna ask for more and more. It's
never gonna end. And where arethe other videos? Huh? Where are

(18:37):
the other photos? That's what I'mno. I'm a taken woman. I
don't I don't need to see that. Okay, I'm a loyal, taken
woman. So I'm gonna ZiT mylip on that. But you would like
to see it? You would clickon it, Yes, you would.
Don't lie. Don't lie to me. Okay, I probably would also click.
Actually, I think I. WhenI saw the videos of Drake,
I tried to find them again andshow them to my man when we were

(19:00):
on FaceTime, and I couldn't findthem anymore. So then I sent him
a meme that someone drew of thevideo. It was kind of funny,
and he was like, why areyou talking about this and showing me this?
I don't like this conversation. Iwas just like, because Babe,
everyone's talking about it. You didn'tsee it on LinkedIn, the only social
media he has in LinkedIn, solike to gauge how viral something is for

(19:23):
us. I asked him like,did you see this on LinkedIn? This
happened but all He's like, no, I didn't see it. I was
like, okay, well maybe hedidn't make the LinkedIn rounds, but yeah,
now we have a little more backgroundabout what happened with Drake in that
leak. Now let's coach on overfrom America to the UK. Kate Middleton.
Everyone's talking about her. There's somany different conspiracy theories about where she
is and where she has been.Kate Middleton, Prince Williams's wife, our

(19:49):
future Queen of England. She hasnot been seen out in the public since
December, and everyone did know thatshe was going to go through surgery and
her team said that she won't beout in public again until Easter. Right,

(20:10):
So when this first got out,everyone was like, oh, okay,
like cool, and then a monthwent by, and then another month
went by, and now it's likegoing on three months. Like the last
time we saw her was around Christmastime, and so people are now coming
up with crazy conspiracy, hilarious conspiracytheories about what actually happened and what is
happening to Caate Middleton. People aresaying that she's getting a BBL. People

(20:33):
are saying that she's getting her nosedone or a facelift, and like all
these different things. Right, nobodyreally knows. Now her team has gone
a wind of all of these conspiracytheories and they are clapping back and they're
like, listen, we already toldyou that you're not going to see her

(20:56):
until Easter, and I told youthat she wanted to keep her privacy,
so she's gonna keep her privacy untilEaster. Period. That's it. We're
talking more about this and then itjust the rumor just kept coming out now

(21:18):
and now and now, like theyTikTok does not stop now. Interestingly enough,
yesterday we did get the first viewingof Kate Middleton. Now this is
you know, how the UK Popsis, I mean, the UK Pops
has brought people down unfortunately rest inparadise to our Queen Diana. But they

(21:41):
did get photos of her in acar sitting on the passenger side with her
mom. And this is part youguys are so annoying. You are so
annoying. This is the part thattook me out. Okay, it's it's
from far away. It's like avery high quality paparazzi camera, but it's
super far away, so it's grainy. People zoomed in the photo and like

(22:07):
tried to make it high deaf withAI, and everyone's like, oh my
gosh, she got rid of themole. She has like a cute little
mole on the side of her likeright lip, and people were like,
she got rid of the mole.Okay, it's so grainy that, like
the real photo is so grainy.Even if use AI, like, you
cannot tell that she got rid ofthe bole. So I don't know yet,
And this photo you can't tell ifshe got rid of the mole.

(22:29):
Her lips look the same, Okay, she didn't get no crazy filler or
anything. Her nose looks the same. She looks beautiful, but she's wearing
your turtlenecks sunglasses and her hair isdown, so you don't really know what
exactly is happening to her happened toher. But I just think that the
rumors are silly and funny, likethe BBLLA ones and like other they're funny.
I mean, I don't think it'smeant to cause harm. I hope

(22:52):
not. But at the end ofthe day, we don't really know what
is happening to her. So whenwe were talking about this on air,
I was just like, we don'tknow what the surgery is just or what
even happen if it was surgery,So let's just make sure that we're sending
her good energy, love, positivevibes, because clearly, if someone is
in the public eye all the timeand then decides to take a few months
off, then that means that theyreally need some personal time, in private

(23:15):
time with just themselves and their family. Even her husband, Prince Harry Harry
though one Williams, he had toback out of some pretty large engagements to
make sure that he was there forhis wifey. So I don't know what's
going on. Wishing them love andpeace and good energy because if it was,

(23:37):
you know, that serious, andit could have been really tough.
And I don't really think that she'sproblematic, like I I really don't.
I think she stays in her lane. Well, she doesn't have to,
Like, she doesn't have to stayin her lane. Nobody does. I
think that she's like, you knowwhat, I'm the princess and gonna be
the queen one day, so I'mjust gonna like sit here. And her

(24:00):
kids are adorable, Like I lovewhen there's funny videos of her kids being
out and they're just kind of likeacting like little kids, and she's doing
her best to like you know,parent them, but also kind of goofing
and laughing around along when they dosilly things. Yeah, I don't,
I'll have problem Kate Milton. Ithink people be hating on her, and
they be hating on her sissy inlaw too, and it's just Megan Megan

(24:21):
Markle, our American queen and whenever, like what the live their lives.
But yes, let's hope that everythingthat went on with her and is going
on with her is okay. AndI'm sure we're gonna find out, so
we'll see what happens. I'll keepbe posted to no this man though,
this man and queens. This storythere's so many layers. I was dagging.

(24:41):
This is a really big news headlinehere in the tri State in New
York area, but it's just aconversation in general because home squatters have been
becoming more and more of a topbecause there's a lot of laws that have

(25:02):
been protecting people from staying in residencesthat they don't pay for essentially, which
is, first of all, like, let's take a step back. That's
really awful. Like it's really toughthat there are people that you know,
can't afford to live, so theyjust have to find houses in squat there.
Homelessness obviously is a huge problem everywherein the world. Oh gosh,

(25:25):
sorry I had to take a quickcough break, but yes, and the
people that are squatting literally that don'thave a place to live, I feel
my heart is out for them.And then there's other people that are squatting
just because they're stubborn and feel veryentitled. I want to introduce you Brett
Floris or his other name. Healso goes by Brett Fisher. All right,

(25:49):
Brett Flores, do not be posingas a Latino. First of all,
Okay, this man Brett Flores.He refuses to leave this home in
Douglaston, Queens that was sold backin October to a couple for two million

(26:11):
dollars. So he's living in atwo million dollar home and has been since
October and refuses to leave. Thehomeowners Joseph and Susannah Landa are furious.
They've been trying to work with thejudicial system for these past five months,

(26:32):
almost half a year, because thisguy refuses to leave the property. Now,
here's what we know so far.This is where the story gets crazy.
Okay, Brett used to be thecaretaker for the previous homeowner who was
mad old. Brett was getting paidthree thousand dollars a week to caretake for

(26:56):
Bernard Fernandez, older man now canPasisconse. Bernard passed away January of last
year. So from last January toOctober, Brett has been living there Revere,
Okay, and it's two million dollarhome. So then the home gets

(27:18):
old in October, and then thiscouple buys the home and obviously Brett is
refusing to leave. Now Brett lawyeredup his lawyer O'Sullivan and him are they
are sticking to their guns, sayingthat there is quote a revelation that is
going to turn this narrative on itshead that allegedly the homeowners, Joseph and

(27:45):
Susannah, they are not victims inthis case, and there are audio recordings
to prove that. Not only that, there are also core documents that during
that time of January October, Brettwas trying to slip in rent out rooms
in the house that he doesn't ownby his former employee. He was trying
to rent out rooms in a homethat he does not own. The nerve,

(28:11):
now, what are these audio recordings? We don't know. Where is
this proof that's gonna quote turn thenarrative on. It's we girl, We
don't know. We don't know becauseso far we have no proof. And
the judge is like, all right, what's going on? Where's the proof?
Here we are, we're in courtand the lawyer is like, you,
I have a new born at home, so can we just push the
court date? That's what that happensa lot in court, Like these lawyers

(28:33):
be given grand excuses to push courtdates, and it's like babysitting. I
want to hear the audio recordings.What kind of audio recording are you going
to have, sir, proving thatthe people that just spent two million dollars
on a home don't own the home? What? What is it? What's
going on? If the homeowner died, that's it. No one owns the
home. But we'll see what thesequote audio recordings and these revelations are because

(28:59):
someone squatting up in a house that'sworth two million dollars trying to rent out
rooms get a lick off of itat the same time. Insanity. The
fact the first run flag to me, obviously was that this guy's trying to
pose as a Latino like Brett Fisher, Comambra, Comeumbra and not saying that
you know, as Latino sir,perfect people. Of course, we do

(29:22):
our we do our fair share ofshade things. But bro, this is
this is a good one, andI cannot wait, Oh gosh, I
cannot wait to see what happens.Squatters are a huge problem. Again.
Condolences to anyone that is going throughhousing issues right now. It's so tough
to live out here, but wehave people that are out here two million

(29:44):
dollar home sir, No, Ihave no sympathy for you. You were
making three Can we talk about howhe was making three thousand dollars a week
to change your grown man's diaper?Yes, yes, sign me up.
Shoot three thousand dollars a week thoughbefore after taxes. I don't know.
What do you think would you bea caregiver for three thousand dollars a week?

(30:06):
Uh? Yeah? Uh? Idon't know, y'all. That's a
tough one. That's a tough one. He's making money, though, you
were making so much money. Whereis the money? Where is the money?
Where's those three thousand dollars a week? Bro? Love this story.
I'm going to keep very close tabson you, Brett, I really will.
Huh. Is that enough cheesement foryou? All right, Let's head

(30:30):
into Crystal's cave. This was goingon with me and my life and me
and everything and me and me andme and me and may Yeah yeah yeay
hey yea yeah yeah, yeay Hello. Who's in here? It's so dark?
Ew, what's dripping? I canstep on something. You're now inside
crystals case. Listen. I'm nota girl that takes six days for willy

(30:56):
nilly I have. I've been givingmyself like a lot more grace on sick
days though, Like this is mysecond sick day on Monday that I took
here at work because I was likeactually dead, like I could not.
It's the body aches, it's thedisgusting cough and everything. It's ordering chicken

(31:18):
soup for myself that's disgusting because it'snot my mom's cargo. I just I
miss my mom's cargo that boy.Oh, I miss her carditos. I
miss her females. I really do. It's just it's tough when you're sick
and you're cat can't make you yourmom's cardo. But yeah, like I
worked this weekend and actually I hada house swarming party in Brooklyn. I

(31:42):
never go to Brooklyn never, never, never, never go to Brooklyn,
Like if you live in Manhattan,it's just like why, you know.
So I was actually going to goto a housewarming party in Brooklyn, which
I was kind of geeked about.It was gonna be like my first housewarming
party one of my friends that Ihaven't seen in a very long time,
and I told some of my friendsto come along with And then I'm at

(32:04):
work on Saturday. I'm not feelinggood. And then after work, I'm
just like you, guys, Idon't think i'm feeling good. I think
I'm getting sick, and they werelike, no problem, we love you
feel better, which I love.And then I just facetimed with my boyfriend
all of Saturday. And then Sunday, wait, yeah, Sunday. I

(32:30):
woke up and I was supposed togo to church and I was like,
well, I cannot get out ofbed, Like my whole body is aching.
I feel so sick, and I'vehad I've been sick for the past
like month. I had to takea sick day a few weeks ago two
because it was just too much.And then Sunday came around and I just
like could not get out of bed. I ordered disgusting chicken noodle soup.

(32:53):
And then it was my brother Junor'sbirthday. It was my brother Junior's birthday
and a while ago go my brotherJunior, he turned thirty one. He
told me, he's like, ohmy gosh, these videos are so funny,
Like I would love people to dopersonalized shout outs for me. Now
if you're on TikTok or maybe Idon't think you've really seen on my Instagram.

(33:15):
They're only popping on Instagram. Butyou can pay people to like do
a huge birthday shout out for you, and it's like ten dollars. And
he loved these like African like acrobaticguys that were like having balloons and signs
and your photos and it's like acute little like fifteen second and like dance

(33:37):
for you, right, And soI was like, I'm going to do
one of these for Junior, becausehe mentioned a while ago that he would
love one of these. So Isent the video to my boyfriend and he
went to my parents' house and wewere on FaceTime and I was like,
okay, you guys, like here'sJunior's present. And Junior was speechless,

(33:57):
like he was like no way.We saw the video together, probably like
twenty times, all together in thehouse. It was just my mom,
my dad, the little duck,my nephew, my little brother Semon,
Junior, my boyfriend and his son, and they were just like cracking up,
like it was just the best present. My brother like was so happy.
He just loved it so so much, and it was just such a

(34:19):
good vibe. And the sign saidthe sign that they read out loud,
it was like happy birthday Junior twentyfour K all Day, because that's his
instagram is twenty four Custom twenty fourK, so it's like Custom twenty four
K all Day. He's single,ladies and ready for a wife. My
brother Junior, he's thirty one andhe's ready for a wife. He's looking

(34:40):
for a wife. And a HappyBirthday from Otto Sau's Ranch that's what That's
what our family calls like the housethat we live and grew up and we
call it roa Sauce Ranch and we'relike, Happy Birthday from Ro Sauce Ranch.
And it was just so fun andwe got to like sing happy birthday
to him. We're all hanging out. Mean, I you know what's kind

(35:01):
of crazy is that like I wasn'tphysically there, but because I was on
FaceTime, I kind of feel likeI was there. They just kind of
propped me up and I was interjectingin conversational. We were actually able to
all be together. And I FaceTimemy family a lot, but you know,
first of all, like I was, I'm just really happy that I

(35:21):
was able to, you know,spend those I was FaceTime with them probably
like maybe like two or three hours. I was really happy that I got
to spend that night with them,even though I was I was pretty sick,
but I was just kind of like, you know whatever, returning out
for drinking birthday. They were alldrinking, they were all taking shots and
stuff. I was like, bro, are you serious right now? Like
my little brother said, I waslike, you're so jealous. You're not
here right now with us, andmy boyfriend doesn't even drink. He literally

(35:42):
only took a shot to make mejealous and give me fomo. I was
so mad. And then they wereall just like having a good time and
it was just my immediate family likenobody else. And I did kind of
feel like I was there, whichwas cool. It did make me a
little sad that I I wasn't there. Oh, I'm very emotional today.
I'm not gonna like I'm very emotional. I don't. I don't know why

(36:05):
why I'm so emotional, but Ireally am. Yeah, I was.
I was like definitely kind of sadthat I wasn't there, But you know,
it's also way later for us herein New York that it is over
there. So by eleven twelve,I was already kind of tired and that
was only like nine for them,so I tapped out. But my boyfriend
was there until like past midnight,just hanging out playing video games with my

(36:28):
brother and the duck and his sonand just vibing, and I was so
it made me feel so good thatmy boyfriend, even though I'm not home,
he's making such an effort to spendtime with my family. You know,
he's he's busy with his side ofthe family too, and you know,
he's deciding that with his time thathe has with his son, like

(36:51):
he wants to spend it with myfamily, even if I'm not physically there.
And I'm just like, oh,like I love that, Like you're
just like I'm split, Like myheart is, like I wish I was
there with you guys, but itmakes me so happy that he cares so
much about me and he loves myfamily so much that he likes being over
there. I didn't know that heleft so late. You know, we

(37:14):
caught up. We caught up thenext day and he was just like,
yeah, like, I don't thinkI left until like twelve twelve thirty we
got home. My hell, it'shired. I was like, you are
not that late. He's like,yeah, I mean I love being over
there. I love being with youguys. Like it's really fun for me.
I'm just like, that's always whatI wanted. That is always what
I wanted, and my family loveshim being there too, And it was

(37:35):
it was it was great. Itwas great, but I was dead.
I was dead. And then Iwoke up and actually, like at four
in the morning, I sent anemail to my boss. I was like,
it's looking bad, Like there's noway I'm going to come in today.
So Monday, I took a sickday and I just tried to recop,
and then Tuesday it was hit theground running for International Women's Month.
We had a panel and I'm sothankful I was asked to be on the

(37:57):
panel here at work for iHeart.They invited amazing clients and partners that we
have here in iHeart New York,and they had a kind of like you
know, little summit where they hadus the talent and they had musical performances.
They had the ladies from Wicked onBroadway come and sing for us,

(38:19):
which was everything. And then Iwas on the panel with amazing talent here
in New York, Christi from LIGHTFM, Danielle and Gandhi from our morning show
here on Z one hundred. Theyhad Angela Yee from Way Up with Angela
interview Angie Martinez. So it's liketwo of the women that I look up
to so much in radio like interviewingeach other like craziness. My boss,

(38:45):
yeah, she interviewed us the talent. The talent on my panel, and
it was just honestly, it wasamazing. Like at some points hearing what
my coworkers were saying, like Igot a little like emotional. I'm just
like, oh my gosh, wereally do get put through a lot,
and we really have to do alot, and we're trying to figure out

(39:07):
what to do for International Women's Day, which is this Friday, right,
and other years they've had us dopanels on air and kind of take over
for a few hours or whatever,or they'll have women lead the shows,
right or only women on air,and that was kind of annoying. It
was kind of like, honestly,a little slap in the face if you

(39:28):
think about it, because it's likewe're celebrating you by giving you more work.
That's kind of how it looked andfelt to some of us, and
a lot of us over the yearshave spoken out about that, and this
year, one of our directors shewas like, well, we wanted to
give you guys, all women theday off, but then there is a

(39:51):
man that is not on board anddoesn't want to do it and is very
powerful, so you guys aren't doingthat, and it's just kind of like,
that's exactly what we're talking about,Like this alone is exactly what we're
talking about. Like women carry somuch weight in every industry that men don't

(40:15):
even want us to get one dayoff. And in men's defenses, there
were men at this meeting that we'retrying to be like, oh well listen,
like you know, however, allother women connect to take the day
off, but just like in thisdepartment, they won't. And then it's

(40:36):
just like, well, then thatdefeats the purpose. Like if one department
isn't gonna have us take the dayoff, it just makes us look like
salads when we do take this No, like we're all gonna get it off
or we're not gonna get it off, Like if that's just silly. And
if you're offended by this conversation,like imagine how annoyed and offended women feel

(41:00):
that, like we can't even getone day off because a man doesn't want
us to, Like it's just literallyeverything what the day is standing for.
It's just crazy. I mean,I don't know what you guys are doing
in your job. I don't evenknow if it's being celebrated at your job.
Should it even be celebrated? Imean I think so, Like I

(41:22):
really do think so because women wehave come such a long way. But
there was one host on a panelthat said, I've been in radio for
fifty years and I'm honestly just sodisgusted that I'm still seeing the same problems
that a lot of us have beendealing with fifty years ago. And it's
just so true. I know,it's annoying to hear these things and it

(41:46):
feels like we're complaining and whining.It's also things that we're living though,
Like if if you're not living itlike you just you can't understand. And
I really do have to say thankyou to the amazing people at my job
that put that that event on becauseit really did impact me a lot this

(42:06):
year, and it, honestly,it really makes me feel so proud about
the women that have helped me somuch, and the women that I've looked
up to, and the women itmakes me so emotional, the women that
have punched through glass ceilings and havemade it easier for women like me,
because it's it's not easy, likeit's still so hard to be a woman

(42:28):
in any industry. But it justreally made me reflect on the things that
my boss has been through, thatmy coworkers that are older than me or
even my age, have been throughand are still going through and all the
work that we still have to do. I'm still very proud to be the
first Latina woman to host Afternoons atZ one hundred. There's still a long

(42:51):
way to go. But I don'tmake this whole gallivanty thing because I'm like
me, just being in the spaceis enough, Like I don't want to
have to do extra and more tolike prove or show to anyone that we
need to be women inmpowerment and thisand that and that. Like me,
just existing in this space, Ithink is enough. And you just existing

(43:14):
in your role and what you're doingis enough. And we carry so much
weight and work in everything else thatwe do in our lives, like you
being you and doing you and usingyour voice, and men that are allies
for us and continue to fight forus, like eye witness, like I
witness that in my meeting that therewere amazing men that were like trying to

(43:37):
defend us and still trying to geta day off for everybody else and understanding
the whole thing and even say,okay, well what else could we do?
Like ladies, what else do youthink It's like, you know,
what, what if men had aday? What would men be doing on
an International Men Day? They'd beplaying golf. I don't know if i've
shared this before. I think whenwhen Zaddy and I went to this spall

(44:00):
one day, it was like aweekday and it was like a Monday,
and it was like two in theafternoon and We're at the spa and I
was looking around and I was like, Babe, there's no girls here,
Like I would hate to be herealone. I'm very happier here. I
was like, but you know whereall the girls are are the women are

(44:22):
they're working, they're working, Andthere's like fifteen twenty men sprawled out around
the spa relaxing, kicking back,chilling, and you know where the women
are, or the wives or thegirlfriends. They're working. It was mind
boggling to me, it really was. But anyways, yes, happy International

(44:45):
Women's Week. Clearly we have along way to go, but I just
thought that was really interesting. Andthere are so many amazing men that I
work with that do push us anddo lift us up. And I mean,
my boss is alone. Like thefact that my boss took a chance
on me to put a woman onafternoons and Z one hundred, Like he's

(45:06):
not only that, like he isso supportive of me, and he is
someone that's I look at and islike, that's an ally and he understands
when I go to him for things, and he completely I'm very very thankful
that I have support from men hereand women. You know, every time
I go to my bosses, they'rejust like I hear you. Yeah,

(45:29):
I could see why you're very frustratedabout that. Okay, Like how are
you feeling? What do you thinkwe should do about this? Like how
can I help you? Man?Very very empowered from all around, So
wheat is you are enough? Congratulationsfor being alive and riding the fight of

(45:52):
just being in a world where there'sstill some of us that aren't allowed to
speak in rooms. And let's justkeep what we really need to keep doing
is mentoring each other and elevating eachother and pushing each other up. That's
the only way it's going to work. And teach our sons to do that
too, and our daughters, ohmy god, those. I had a

(46:13):
nightmare the other night and I wokeup when I texted my boyfriend, so
like I had a nightmare at that. I was out with my boyfriend Zaddie
somewhere and I got too drunk andI started being Hella mean to him,
like very very mean to him,and he left and he left me,

(46:37):
and I was like I woke upand I was like, oh my gosh,
Oh my gosh. I was like, that is the worst. That
is a true nightmare of mine Ihave. I wouldn't say that I've like
blacked out around my man's yet.I haven't. I don't think I've blacked

(46:57):
out other than the Bad Bunny blackOut of twenty twenty two. I think
that was the last time that Iclock me if I'm wrong, snapchat me
if I'm wrong at lack Crystal rolesas. But I seriously think that the
last time that I for real blackedout was a Bad Bunny Blackout of twenty
twenty two. And that's when Idecided I was going to change my life
in drinking habits because it was notokay. And after that, I was

(47:27):
just like that changed a lot forme. I was like, you know
what, like not cute, notfun, not fresh, don't want my
friends having to take care of meanymore, don't want to get like dragged
home, like it's just embarrassing.Tom Cruise, who I was like loosely
dating at the time, was thereand witnessed it. It was just all
bad, right, so and thatdidn't matter more So it was just like

(47:49):
me. I was like, girl, like, you're like in your late
twenties, Like what are you doing? Get it together? So I don't
think I've blacked out since then.I've definitely heavily drinked sent around him.
There's been like a close calls.There's been some like sloppy nights that we're
not very appreciated, but there hasn'tbeen any blackouts. And I have my

(48:13):
Kira girl, Girl, is Iyour Kana coming up? Is there three
Taniera? I have my three Tanieracoming up, which means my double kan
because I'm turning Dirty thirty and Iam going to be tested to the core
because everybody that I love is therenow. The last time that I was

(48:35):
with everybody that I love was lastyear for my brother's Junior's Dirty thirty and
Zaddy was there and I did drinka lot, and I didn't drink a
lot a lot, but I didn'tblack out. I Yeah, I was
calm, cool and collected, soit was fine, but this time it's

(48:57):
like my part. And also Iwas kind of on edge at the party
because that was the first time thateverybody in my entire life met Zaddy.
So I didn't want to overdrink thenbecause like because I I don't know how
to act like if I overdrink,and like Zaddie's around so sometimes, so

(49:17):
I I want to be very calm, cool, collected around my family,
so my extended family as well,So I like I didn't get too crazy.
And some of the weddings that we'vebeen to together with my family and
Zaddy, like I've got like kindof crazy. I remember the wedding that
we went to in Tahoe. Mymom was there and she said that I
was doggy humping everyone including her.Yeah, that's what I mean. So

(49:38):
this is the first time that I'mgoing to be like celebrating myself for my
birthday with Zaddie and all of mybest friends. So I'm really putting my
blackout limits to the test here,and I don't want to black out.
I really don't want to black out. And so when I had this nightmare

(50:00):
and I woke up thinking like ill. I was so mean when I overdrank
in this nightmare. I just feltso bad and Zaddy had every right to
leave me and break up with meand say I don't want this. So
I was just like really reflecting onthat and this man, Oh, he's

(50:22):
so perfect. He's so perfect.So I text him. I'm like,
Babe, I had a nightmare,like I blacked out and I was just
so mean to you and you leftme, and I just never want to
do that to you, like,I never want to put us in that
situation. And he's like, oh, man, is this something that like
you're afraid is going to happen.I just want you to know that I

(50:44):
love you so much and I don'tever want that to happen either. I
do understand that you're not perfect andmistakes are going to happen, and I
am here to take you with allof your imperfections and I am going to
be there no matter what, becauseyou take me for all my imperfections,
no matter what. And I justdon't want you to worry about that.

(51:05):
And I was like, why whatdid I do to deserve this man?
What did I do to deserve thisman? No? For real? Okay,
that's that's besides the point. Imean, that is how someone should
respond to you. He always respondslike better than I can ever imagine,
right, Like, that was sosweet of him. That's the kind of
that's the kind of man. That'smy man's you know, I'm saying,
that's that's zaty right there. ButI really do, like I want to

(51:30):
have a conversation with myself, andI have been having a conversation with myself
about that because back in the day, like I did have struggle. I
did struggle like I did struggle.I've been in tumultuous relationships. For alcohol
was heavily a part of our relationship, and we would get in crazy fights.
You know, when you're young.That happens sometimes. And I did

(51:53):
not like that. And it wasn'tlike, no blame on him, like
it was it was me. Iwas when I was in my my younger
twenties, I was going through alot of pressure from a lot of different
places. I was going through alot of trauma and trying to deal with
that with alcohol and things. AndI know that I have been like that

(52:17):
before, like been in a rageof anger, and I know that there
is that side of me when alcoholis involved, and I know that my
man now does not deserve that side. I know my man now and what
I've been through like deserves like amore healed me because he's gone through his
healing and it's still going through itand we're both working on that with ourselves

(52:42):
and with each other. And I'mvery thankful that he's patient with me.
There's still things that I do thatare triggering and like not my best self,
and he pushes me like either way, like he's like it's okay,
Like I support that, I knowthat happened. I know this is happening,
and like I just want you tobe bad, Like he literally pushes
me to be better. That's soimportant to me. And it's not to
say, like, girl, chill, you can't. You could black out

(53:06):
every once in a while, LikeI get it, but girl, you
were not there at the Bad BunnyBlackout of twenty twenty two, Like that
was not okay. And that's whatthe first time that's happened. And the
problem is that those things with time. Number one become habits, which like
at one point it kind of wasa habit of mine in patterns, and
number two, it can affect peoplein a crazy way. You say things,

(53:30):
you do things that you wouldn't whenyou weren't under the influence, and
it can impact and affect someone forever. And even though Zaddy is giving me
the grace to make mistakes, thatdoesn't mean that I can turn that around
and manipulate that and like be likeokay, well you know what I was
gonna get blacked out, and likeit's okay, I could do it like
like no, and at the endof the day, like that's what growth

(53:52):
is. I'm turning thirty. I'mturning thirty. I'm not in my early
twenties. Anya, I'm not inmy mid twenties anymore. I'm not in
my late twenties anymore. For thenext like week, ten days, I'm
going to be thirty. And meand Zaddy are getting very serious and having
very serious existential conversations about our futures. And we do see each other in

(54:16):
our future, and that means thatlike what I see in him for the
future and what he sees in mefor the future, like we should be
acting that way towards each other.And I just don't ever want it to
get to a point where like heyou know is questioning or whatever, and

(54:36):
just because I love him so muchand I'm because I know that's not all
what he deserves, and because heis the way that I deserve, and
because also it is it's what's bestfor me. It's what's best for me
is to grow and evolve into Senoralife. You know what I'm saying.
And that's what that's that's what we'reheaded, y'all to Senora life. Because

(54:58):
I'm thirty. I'm going to bethirty. So it's a little disconnected from
my little brother Stevan, who istwenty two and now he's getting into drinking
and all that. He Oh mygosh, this man, this little man,
he is so tall tall and whenhe's like it's pretty much six foot.
But it's so funny because we're out, he wants to get bettle with

(55:22):
me and I'm like, we're like, I've been doing this for ten years,
Ted Crystal, fifteen years. I'vebeen drinking since I was like sixteen.
You know what I'm saying. Andit's Steve. When I have comamra,
you know, I'll still give him. I'll still give him our quality
time when we needed to. Andobviously, like I can have a lot
of fun without being drunk, andI feel way better the next day.

(55:43):
But we're gonna see, y'all,We will see. But I think I
wanted to be fine. I'm goingto continue to pray on it. Please
pray on it for me, becausethat nightmare was terrible, and I really
don't ever want to put myself ina situation where he sees me like so
gross and just disgustingly drunk and he'sjust like, what did I get myself

(56:07):
into? Because, like I mentioned, that's just not what he deserves,
and that's not what I'm ultimately,that's not why I deserve for myself.
That's really what it is. That'snot what I deserve for myself. So
that was my nightmare. Crazy huh. Okay, Now we are going to
get into our daily motivation of theweek. I love these and I'm glad

(56:28):
that you're liking them too. Thisone is called live your life well.
Live your life well today with noapologies. Make your way through the world,
embracing responsibility for your own actions andconsequences. You have unique value,
a worthwhile and authentic perspective. Sharethat value, express that perspective. It's
great to deepen your understanding of others, and to generously give of your spirit.

(56:53):
But that's no reason to become aslave to anyone else's opinion of you.
Open yourself to all the possible abilities, summon the courage and the discipline
to follow the ones that have themost meaning to you. Take a little
bit of risk, do what initiallyfeels uncomfortable. Life is yours today to
be lived in all its richness,and much of that richness exists outside of

(57:15):
what become all too familiar. Nowis your opportunity for a unique and enriching
experience. Make it count, makeit memorable. Give the best of yourself
and make it great. Oh man, that's so good. Give the best
of yourself and make it great.I had a moment like that today because

(57:37):
I've told you how this is likea very shifting year for me. I'm
turning thirty. I'm deciding what I'mgoing to do with the next few years
of my career and where I'm goingto be, Like I'm deciding that within
the next few months. So there'sjust like a lot of things to take
into consideration. I'm in an amazing, healthy relationship that's unfortunately long distance,

(57:58):
so that's really tough, and beingaway for my family is really hard.
And today I just had like oneof those moments in the morning. I
don't know about you, but Imean, we know this. I live
by myself. I live with mycat, and a lot of the times
I'm just like alone, and I'malone because I work a lot. So
I don't really try to make timetoo much for friends during the week because

(58:20):
I'm working a lot and I don'twant to overextend myself. And when I'm
going home from work, or whenI'm getting ready to go to work,
or when i get home from work, I always have something on. I'll
have a podcast on or a showon. I'm watching Just Trish on YouTube.
I'm watching H three podcasts. I'mwatching Jeff FM and watching tanamo joone
canceled. Like I'm a very YouTubegirly right. I even sleep with podcasts

(58:46):
just playing. I know that's weird, but I used to sleep with the
TV on, but the TV's verybright. So now I like turn on
a YouTube podcast and I just sleepwith it. This morning, for whatever,
and I've been having tough I'm sleepingon top of it. But this
morning I did my morning daily prayer, and then I was gonna put a
podcast on. I was like,you know, no, Like, while

(59:07):
I'm doing my hair and makeup,I'm just gonna sit in my thoughts,
which is something that I've been avoidingbecause of all these big decisions i have
coming up. I've been avoiding mythoughts, and I broke down. I
had like a full on mental breakdownjust thinking about everything, and I'm just

(59:28):
thinking, like what makes me thehappiest. It's like it's such an existential
conversation I was having with myself becauseI was like work and missing my family
and wanting to be back home,and then like the career that I have
ahead of me here in New York, but then like just the happiness that
I get when I'm just talking tomy family and just wanting to be there

(59:51):
so bad, and just understanding thatthe family that I have is so unique.
The fact that my family loves eachother so much and has so much
fun together not normal at all,And like the more that I'm away from
them, the more that I'm valuingthat because it's all I've known my whole
life. I took it for granted, and now that I've not been with
them, for three winters now everyday, right, It's just I'm missing

(01:00:15):
them on a crazy level. Andof course my boyfriend being over there ads
layer to it, but it's justlike, ultimately, I was like,
what makes me happiest in the worldbeing at home with my family and laughing
with them, like literally laughing withmy family at my mom's house. So
I just like broke down because I'mjust like, oh my gosh, Oh
my gosh, this is like reallyheavy. And then I had to scurry

(01:00:35):
here to work because I had anartist interview. So I'm like at work,
I'm I was literally doing my makeupwhile tears were running, like ugly
Kim Kardashian tears were running down myface. And then I got to work
and within those twenty minutes, likehere comes this cute, amazing little girl
rock band. They're called the Beaches, and they're coming in and I was
just like I sat down and Ilike read my prayer book. I closed

(01:01:00):
it and I was like, I'mgonna be present. And I had so
much fun. I had so muchfun with the interview and those girls,
and then I had so much funputting content together for my show. And
then I just had so much funon my show, and which is just
so crazy to me because I hadlike the worst morning because I was just

(01:01:20):
like with myself and with my thoughts, and like the more I think about
it, like the more emotional Iget, I think my throat chakra needs
a little cleansing. I'm like verycaught up up here, you know,
I mean the coughs and all thaton top of it. But no,
for real, I wish that therewas just like a magic genie that can
tell you what to do and whatthe perfect path is for you. But

(01:01:42):
there's not. Like you really haveto sit with yourself and your thoughts and
just think of what you want.And that's where I am right now in
my career. So it's really hard, and it's like a really it's just
really really hard. And obviously there'sbigger problems, like I could depletely understand,
like this is a fortorld problem ona magnitude level, and there's so

(01:02:06):
many worst things happening. Of course, this is what's happening with me,
and it's just so interesting that likeI had the worst morning that I've had
in such a long time, LikeI can't remember like the last time that
I cried about something like that,and then I had the best day at
work because I was just like,I'm gonna be present, and I really

(01:02:30):
do feel like I gave the bestof myself and I'm really proud of myself
for doing that. And I thinkwe don't give each other and ourselves enough
credit for that, and I thinkthat's really what matters, Like if in
the moment and in your presence,you can really just try to make it
the best and give thinks and befilled with gratitude and like just really give

(01:02:52):
your Like how good do you feelwhen you know that you did your best
at something? And I'm really proudthat I wasn't like closed off and I
was like open today and I wasjust trying to put my best foot forward.
And I think that attitude is gonnakeep pushing me forward with these very
wobbly next few months. And it'sjust really it's just been a little tough

(01:03:15):
over here. My really good friendinvited me to MISA and I'm about to
go right now. I'm probably gonnabe a little late, but it's like
the Youth, It's the Youth Masstonight. So let me just wrap this
up and say thank you. Verymuch and say I love you very much,
and I know that we're all goingthrough things and that life be tough
sometimes, but I hope that youcan live your life well, no matter

(01:03:37):
what that means to you, andgive the best of yourself and make it
great because in the present, that'sliterally all we could do. And I
hope that you enjoyed tonight's episode ofCrystals night Cap. Thank you so much
for hanging out with me. Pleaseshare the podcast with your friends if you're
really liking it. Next week I'llclose off with the prayer. I just

(01:03:58):
didn't have time right now. Ineed to go hang out with God for
a second. I really really doneed that. But yeah, keeping your
prayers. I'm keeping you in myprayer. Yeah, I'm keeping you in
my prayers. I love you so, so so much, and I'll see
you on the next one.