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May 19, 2025 • 11 mins
On today's P1 Podcast, we get an update on the gold tournament that Eddie took part in over the weekend. While he was able to get drunk, his uncle was stopping him from something else...
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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Well, it is time for a little bit of an update.
Last we met, I said I was going to a
golf tourmur I was headed out of here. I was
headed to be a golf tournament, but I didn't know
if I was going to get drunk or not. Is
it even a golf tournament if you don't get drunk.

Speaker 2 (00:15):
No?

Speaker 1 (00:17):
Oh, well, I can give you a little update on
what happened at the golf tournament. And also there was
a little bit of an incident with cheating. We ain't
done yet.

Speaker 2 (00:29):
It's time for the one podcast over a year, completely
uncensored and unacting filtered except for that part the party
the show's after show starts. Now.

Speaker 1 (00:45):
Yeah, it was a It was a different kind of
tournament and different kind of vibe because it was all
based around the high school and the high school team
and all that stuff. So there was no drinking on
the holes. You know, on the holes you could have
different Usually in golf tournaments they have coolers on certain boles,
or like we said, the ice luge or whatever, girls

(01:07):
in bikinis, well maybe mostly ours, but you know, there's
all kinds of different kinds of tournaments, and most of
them it does involve drinking and stuff like that. Well,
that's totally different, vibe, totally different. But I can't say that.
I was really excited to see our hole that we sponsored.
Did I tell you guys that? I remember if I
said the song meaning no, the show sponsored a hole. Yeah,

(01:30):
I paid for it. I forgot to tell you guys that.
Oh my god, show. I'm glad we did that.

Speaker 3 (01:36):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:37):
Yeah, nice.

Speaker 3 (01:38):
I'm so excited to write that off on my taxes.
Oh there's a little sign right there.

Speaker 1 (01:46):
Yeah, we did it.

Speaker 3 (01:47):
We made it. You guys. Tell ya look at that donating.

Speaker 1 (01:51):
Moody man, you guys are awesome.

Speaker 2 (01:53):
Thanks.

Speaker 3 (01:54):
Uh okay.

Speaker 1 (01:57):
Yeah, so our hole was great. So I was excited
about that, but no beers or anything. It was a
part five.

Speaker 3 (02:05):
I believe you show it everybody, like, this is the whole.

Speaker 1 (02:08):
Do you see the picture? I was pretty excited. I've
never sponsored a golf tournament holes before, so yeah, and
so that would be the hole to have some beers on. Right,
So there was no real drinking, you know at the
different holes. That being said, did I get sucked up? Sure?

(02:28):
It wasn't like the golf course doesn't have a bar,
has a bar and so I had some buddies who
played in the tournament. So there was a four some
of my good friends who were there, and so I
wasn't even thinking. As soon as I arrived, I had time.
I had like an hour before we are tea time
started and so I met up with them and we're like,

(02:49):
are we should we? Are we doing this? And then
I had another buddy who was there, who I didn't
know was even playing in the tournament, and I was like,
what the fuck are you doing here? My con with us?
Let's go, man, And so we all hit the bar.
We all got our cocktails.

Speaker 4 (03:04):
Now are you guys like the only ones from the
tournament in there?

Speaker 1 (03:07):
Okay, so the golfers they're gonna drink yeah yeah, So
the bar was packed. Yeah, so everybody's getting their drink
on beforehand, because well, I think we all had the
same vibe.

Speaker 3 (03:18):
Yeah you're scared. There was no not gonna be it
was it.

Speaker 1 (03:20):
You also got to wait for the carcool that takes forever.
And so we got our cocktails and then of course
what does somebody say, Well, we're gonna do a shot
right right? Yeah? And so you know me, I'm more
of a you know, fruity, Yeah, you know, give me
a buttery nipple or something like.

Speaker 3 (03:37):
That with a bunch of guys.

Speaker 2 (03:40):
I don't.

Speaker 3 (03:41):
I don't know if their shot is the purple hooter.

Speaker 1 (03:43):
It really wasn't. What are we doing? And my buddy
Josh goes man that Don Julio is calling my name,
and I went, damn it, oh no no. But you
know when in Rome, stop it tequila. I did doing
tequila shows. So by the time the tournament gets underway,

(04:04):
I'm feeling that you feel I'm ready to go. Well,
now I got eighteen holes and I'm probably not going
to drink it the whole rest of the time.

Speaker 4 (04:10):
Now, when you realize that there was no booze on
the course, did you add all consider calling Emily and
have her come around to Yeah East County bitches, bring
the drinks.

Speaker 1 (04:21):
Around emergency services.

Speaker 4 (04:22):
Yeah, yeah, emergency would be nice. I feel like she's great.

Speaker 5 (04:25):
At that, though we covered on Friday's podcast that I'm
not that great at it, because Eddie, that one tournament
that you and I were driving around and I was
yelling out eas kindy bitches, we never actually delivered.

Speaker 3 (04:37):
You didn't, And I know alcohol prices, I know alcohol prices, right, guys,
Oh my god.

Speaker 1 (04:42):
Okay, she's very loud, excited, she knows alcohol prices.

Speaker 5 (04:46):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (04:47):
Yeah, and Emily's her one job was to bring cocktails
to me, and she didn't do it.

Speaker 4 (04:52):
Didn't.

Speaker 1 (04:52):
No, I didn't call her.

Speaker 3 (04:53):
Okay, you're right. It's a bad well.

Speaker 1 (04:55):
And I also kind of had to keep it somewhat
cool because I'm playing with my daughter and my straight
laced uncle. My uncle was very he's very serious about golf.
He's a you know, very straight laced guy. He's a
former professor. Like he he doesn't fuck around. He's not drinking.
And so I also, you know, didn't want to get
too smammered, and so I was. I was you know,
once I got my drinks in, I was good, and

(05:18):
I'm like, all right now I'm loosey goosey, ready to play. Yeah. Yeah,
So I was fine. You know, did I when the
cargirl came around? Did I get another drink? Yes? Of course,
But I wasn't good. Am I going to see her again?
You never know, you usually get her once on any
air per nine.

Speaker 3 (05:32):
Very smart. I don't want to thank you.

Speaker 1 (05:35):
So I'm fine, I'm doing good. I'm not going crazy
or whatever.

Speaker 5 (05:38):
But your dad doing being grumpy if.

Speaker 4 (05:43):
It's not his five o'clock cocktail, he's not having it.

Speaker 1 (05:47):
Back in the day, he would drink beers on the course,
but he wasn't. He wasn't drinking nothing for big Yeah
it was whatever, And so I'm the only loser out
there drinking.

Speaker 5 (05:59):
But that's fine.

Speaker 1 (06:00):
I don't care. I was having a good old time. Well,
when you play these tournaments, store will remember this. When
you play in these charitable golf tournaments on a lot
of holes, they'll have different like games or advantages that
they just want to raise more money for, because the
actual tournament itself is kind of secondary. Really. They're they're

(06:20):
all about. They want to raise funds for whatever it
is they're doing. So they'll have a you know what,
we have this cannon you can pay for that. They'll
shoot the golf ball at and you pay for it,
and that's your drive. Oh that's cool, yeah, which is like, Okay,
that's not really golf, but who cares.

Speaker 3 (06:35):
It's fun absolutely.

Speaker 1 (06:37):
Or you're gonna roll a dice and whatever dice you roll,
that's whatever where you get to start your drive at.

Speaker 3 (06:43):
Okay, all kind of is there one with a lottery scratcher.

Speaker 1 (06:46):
Uh no, but there was a they did have a
poker hand where which I did pay for it. I
didn't win. I know where you pick cards and whatever
cards you picked that was your poker hand, and whoever
won the poker hand won a prize. Oh no a
so and then you know, you open up the cards
and you're like, all right, well I had whatever. I
had a pair of sixes and I didn't win.

Speaker 3 (07:06):
I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 (07:07):
I was pissed, but whatever. Fun. So in one of
the holes, there's a par three and you basically there
was a ten foot circle around the hole. And so
they said, if you make it into that ten foot
radius on your drive, then that counts as a hole
in one. Oh nice, and you could pay forty bucks

(07:27):
and your whole team is eligible for it. And I
and I was like, all right, get forty again. But
if everybody pays ten charity still before it's usually like
ten bucks for that. No, no, it's it's usually pretty high. No,
definitely not. You'd be playing at Augusta.

Speaker 2 (07:52):
Yeah, yeah, everybody out to Agusta.

Speaker 1 (07:58):
So it's forty bucks and I'm like, all right, well,
I'll just pay for everybody, and we'll just do it.
And you know it's like.

Speaker 3 (08:05):
Most people doing it.

Speaker 1 (08:06):
Oh yeah, everybody's doing it. Yeah, you know, well there
are some out there, thank you. You can pay for
your individual shot, or you can pay for your team whatever.
And if everybody kicks in ten, that's fine. But I'm
not gonna make my daughter or my dad or whatever.
I just paid for the team, and that way we
all have an opportunity for it. Well, of course we suck,
and so we didn't come close to making it. We

(08:28):
didn't even make it on the green, so we're just
off the green. And so they so on your second shot,
if you're within the ten foot radius, you get a birdie. Okay,
so I'm like, that's still good. I'll take that. So
we all have to now chip to try and make
it into this ten foot radius hole to get the birdie.
So I get up, boom, don't even come close. I'm terrible. Yeah, yeah, awful.

(08:54):
My daughter goes doesn't make it, my dad goes doesn't
make it. And now my uncle, who's pretty good, he
gets up up, he chips it's it's headed right for
the circle. I'm like, oh yeah, we got it, and
it keeps rolling, rolling, rolling, and it dis rolls. I
swear maybe two inches outside of the circle. Well, at
this point, by the way it is, we're on the

(09:17):
back nine, so I would say we only have like
five holes left. I'm exhausted. I was drunk earlier. It's
been a no nap day, so I'm I'm kind of
already over it. And so I go kind of flippantly,
I say, I just paid forty bucks. That's a birdie.
In my eyes, I'm taking it. And I'm kind of

(09:38):
laughing about it. And my daughter is standing right there
and she goes, yeah, it's so close. Yeah, we should
take it. And I then look over and my uncle
is shaking his head in shame, in shame, and he goes, no,
we are not taking what He goes, it's not is
it inside the circle? And do you think I'm a

(10:00):
rule follower?

Speaker 4 (10:01):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (10:01):
This guy does not fuck around. I mean he's counting
every single shot he's counting, which is crazy. Gimmy's no nothing.

Speaker 3 (10:08):
For shotgun starts like this.

Speaker 1 (10:10):
Everyone cheats. Well, and it's not even the it's the
tournament itself is like secondary. Yeah, par you know what,
what's part like sixty four? I don't know. No, you
do seventy two or seventy two. I'm sorry, seventy two, right,
So much people hit seventy lower than seventy two.

Speaker 3 (10:25):
Some guys will come back and be like twenty three, and.

Speaker 1 (10:28):
You're like, dude, what the fuck? Every hole? There's no
way we were playing with this guy.

Speaker 2 (10:33):
Fucking that is true that you're just like what they
got twenty three.

Speaker 1 (10:38):
So because my uncle's counting every single shot, we have
no chance to win the tournament. So this hole does
not matter. So that's why I was like, who cares.
I just paid forty bucks, give me the burden.

Speaker 3 (10:49):
It still wouldn't matter.

Speaker 1 (10:50):
He would not do it. He would not do it really,
So and I and I Michael, who's doing a scorecard?
He is? And so do I go, come on, man, like,
do I argue it? I mean, it's my own goal?
And I go, well, he's actually kind of teaching my daughter,
like the right way to play golf. Yes, yes, and
you know because he's on the golf team that's the
wrong way. But you don't play golf, like, how do I.

Speaker 2 (11:13):
Feel needs to know when when the balls in the
rough and you're a couple of inches away from the
green and the fair way.

Speaker 1 (11:18):
You kick it a little bit o. Wait, hold on,
hold on, You look to the left, and you give
it a lot of nudge. Found it to find that.
I swear I thought it was ob. I must have
hit something and there's no here. Must have maybe I
hit a bird, So now I know how Thor plays.

(11:40):
I kind of did
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